Lost In Delirium

Chapter 6: Missing In Action

Weeks passed without any visit from Zuko and Toph did not know whether to feel relieved or nervous. She spent her days hammering the soles of her leather boots to thinness so that it would be easier for her to feel the ground beneath her feet while still not giving away that she was actually learning something about this place. After another visit to the baths, she had figured out why it was so much cooler. The reason being an underground river, probably flowing in from the sea somehow. She did not know how she would break into it or even if there was any escape that way, but perhaps the next time, if given the chance, she could explore it further.

Mai and Ty Lee had made their presences worthwhile over the last week or so. When all three of them were bored, the two Fire Nation warriors would often visit her and the three would play mah-jong, though that proved to be quite difficult for Toph to learn, though as soon as she figured out how to recognise the different tiles by the feel of the engravings on the front, she was actually quite good.

But for some reason, it was usually Mai who won, her usual deadpan expression and voice signifying no real pride during the occasion. The girl learned to enjoy their company and at times when they left, she felt a sense of guilt and depression knowing that they were still the enemy, but cast that into the back of her mind and forced herself to remain rational.

Standing up from her place on the bed, the blind girl went around the side of the large wooden bed and kneeled down, sticking her hand under the mattress and pulling out a piece of fabric that had once covered a cushion.

In her pocket, were a few large and heavy stones that she'd managed to steal during a walk in the garden with Azula. She stuffed the stones into the cushion cover and pushed them all to one corner, tying a knot at the point where they were secure.

It wasn't much of a weapon, but if she played her cards right and managed to nick a few things here and there, it may prove to be her ticket out of here. Once she got out, the idea was to hide somewhere on the island until her friends came and they could all just run away. But even she knew that there were about a million and one flaws in the plan and the likelihood of it working, was next to zero.

Hiding the makeshift weapon back under the bed, she quickly stood up and composed herself as a knock sounded at the door.

"Uh – come in," the girl said quickly, seating herself on the bed and clearing her throat.

A rather flustered looking Azula walked in, and though she couldn't see, the rather shaky vibrations coming from her footsteps told her that something had happened. "And how are we this morning?" the princess asked, offhandedly, walking in quickly, slightly breathless. Now this wasn't Azula.

Confusion evident on her face, Toph stood up slowly and frowned. "Uh…I'm fine?"

The brown haired girl nodded, her mind seemingly on something else. "Good, good, nothing out of order. Good," she said, more to herself than anyone else.

Now Toph knew something was wrong. "Azula, is…what's with you?" she asked, unsure of how to talk to the girl when she was in such a state. She didn't know if she should have just asked normally but the girl probably wouldn't have realised anyway.

Brown eyes flickered with worry upon hearing the question and she paused, looking towards Toph almost as if she were pondering something about her. Shaking her head, the princess said calmly, "There's nothing wrong. Everything is going to be alright." Again, there was self assurance in her tone and something clicked at the back of the Earth Bender's mind. Although her last statement seemed more as if she was affirming something to herself than to Toph. Azula would never say something like that to another human being.

Something had happened and the princess was scared. 'Does it have anything to do with Zuko?' she thought suddenly. 'Is that why I haven't seen him?'

"Hey, Princess, has something happened?"

That seemed to bring the other girl back to her old self. Her face seemed to change and there was nothing in her body language or her heartbeats that told the girl anything. She was passive and cold and composed. And if Toph hadn't been trying to figure out what was wrong, she would have praised the girl's self control.

And the voice that came out of her lips was as level as ever as she said stonily, "Nothing has happened. I was just coming around to check on your welfare." She turned to leave, "You will dine with us tonight. Mai and Ty Lee will get you ready by seven. Don't be late."

She left as quickly as she came and for a few moments, Toph just stood there as still as a rock, stunned and confused. Dine? With Fire Benders? She'd rather get fried! But then she wondered why she was dining with them. Surely such an occasion marked the end of the world…that or someone was with them. Possibly the Fire Lord.

A sudden panic fluttered within her chest. If it was one person she didn't want to meet, it was Lord Ozai. Was that why, for less than a minute, Azula was so unlike herself? Why she seemed afraid and worried? The only time she'd felt Azula like that was when Aang, Katara, Zuko and herself had almost captured her before she hit Uncle Iroh.

But that was years ago. The girl's thoughts travelled to Uncle Iroh and how he was in a cell somewhere below her in the dungeons, probably with no water, half starving and dying. She vaguely mused to herself whether they gave him any tea.

Sighing, the green eyed girl sat back down on the bed, the daunting occasion of dining with Fire Benders inching ever so much closer like dawn's first light. She almost felt as if it was her last hour and she was having her last meal.

She shuddered and closed her eyes, hoping that her assumptions were wrong.

--

Azula sat in her work room, sitting at her desk, elbows on the table and her fingers massaging her temples. She was tired and the anxiety of tonight's dinner wasn't helping. There were a good number of Fire Nation officials and members of parliament coming and all of them wanted to see the girl.

The princess had no idea why but they wouldn't take no for an answer. Mai and Ty Lee sat opposite her, worry and concern evident on both their faces. The acrobat leaned across and placed her hand in front of the girl who, upon opening her eyes, sighed and grasped her friend's hand tightly for a second before letting go.

"Tonight's dinner is important. I believe that it is the guests' intention to make sure that I still have the girl. Many of them have seen her before with the Avatar and if it's proof they want, I cannot deny them that."

The girl stood and folded her arms, turning her back to them and looking out the window. "I do not know their intentions once they've arrived. There will be guards at every door and corridor but you two must keep an eye on the girl."

"But why?" Ty Lee asked.

"To ensure that she doesn't escape," she paused and inhaled deeply, confessing, "and to make sure that no one else takes her. She's important to us. We must keep her within our grasp at all times."

Both the other girls looked at each other and Mai asked hesitantly, "But why would they take her? It would be stupid to kidnap a prisoner from the Princess."

"These people are dangerous, Mai. What do you think it will look like to my father if one of my prisoners, the most important of them, 'escapes' and somehow ends up in some general's cellar?" She turned around and banged her fist on the desk, leaning down so that she was level with their faces, looking darkly into their eyes.

"I will not lose everything I've accomplished so far," she hissed. "I will not lose my dignity or my power or my chance at the kingdom once my father dies." Her face softened and she stood up. "You two have been so faithful and loyal to me. Not to mention you two are the only two I can call my true accomplices. I need you always by my side or I risk losing everything…you two included."

The acrobat gave her friend an encouraging smile. "We understand."

Warmth flickered in Mai's eyes and she allowed the smallest of smile to grace her lips. "We're not going anywhere. Leave tonight to us."

Golden brown eyes gazed with uncharacteristic tenderness over at her two closest friends. They weren't exactly friends, more like the most loyal childhood female allies she would ever find. She dismissed them and they stood up, bowing to her in unison and walking out, unknowingly to her, giving final fleeting glances before exiting.

--

Zuko sat outside his uncle's cell, leaning against the door with his eyes closed and his head hung low. He had felt terrible ever since the day he'd yelled at her. On one hand, he felt obliged to do what his uncle told him to, and on the other he didn't want to get too close to the girl for fear that Azula may do something worse to Iroh or to himself. He did not give two cents if Azula were to hurt Toph, but seeing as his uncle would never forgive him should he deny him his wish, he realised that he had to keep her alive at least…no matter how much it tormented him seeing her walking, alive and unhurt.

Tonight's dinner was going to be cold as usual. None of the government officials or the generals paid much heed to him but they did pay him some respect when they had to talk to him. Still, he couldn't help but feel bitterness and detestation towards them all.

"Uncle…I can't do it," he said quietly, feeling the weight of guilt crush over him.

"You must. You must protect her. Never forget, Zuko; you are much stronger than them. I have trained you and you have learned. You have learned many techniques but you have also learned to be humble. Their minds are twisted, yours is clear and you must not let their treachery affect you," Iroh said wisely and seriously.

Frustration coursed through the scarred prince. "I know! But…it's so hard. They don't need to speak for me to know that they're insulting me." He ran a hand through his loose hair and growled in annoyance.

'And I'm not as clear and good as you think, Uncle…I despise that bitch.'

Iroh stood up and looked through the tiny grilled window in the door and down at his nephew. "Zuko, you are like a son to me and I know you. I know that you can build enough strength within you to do what is right."

And all of a sudden, Zuko realised that his uncle wasn't just talking about the dinner tonight.

"You have to stop the suffering. You have to stop the oppression and the anger of all the other nations. I do not expect you to do it all by yourself but I know that you can if you have help. Please Zuko, they will need her when the time comes. It is time for you to prove yourself. Not now, but soon."

The prince stood and gazed through the bars at the kind old face staring back at him. "You can do it, my boy."

Amber eyes stared into old brown ones and the boy nodded. "I will watch her tonight."

'Even if it means having to put up with her.'

The reasons he had not been to see her lately were that he just could not be bothered to be around someone so uncouth and crude and someone who paid absolutely no respect to him. His hatred for her was one thing, but he also felt increasing frustration whenever he looked at her. All he wanted to do was wrap his hands around her neck and hurt her. He wanted to tell her that her friends were not coming. Because the likelihood of them reaching here alive, with the Southern Water Tribe or not, was slowly desisting.

Silently he revelled in the fact that he friends may even die before they set foot on Fire Nation territory. He wanted to see her face when he told her they had not made it. He wanted to see the pain in her eyes when their mangled bodies were thrown before her feet, when her hands ran over their broken forms, when she screamed in pain as she held them close to her chest, her body too stunned to shed tears.

As he walked away from the dungeons, a dark, sinister smile came to his lips as he imagined her weeping dry tears onto the floor, her whole being collapsed and devoid of any hope. He wanted to see it all.

'I want to see you cry.'

Now all he had to do was go and face the girl. And when it came to the feisty Earth Bender that was never anything to look forward to.

--

Green eyes looked up automatically as a knock came at the door. The entire afternoon had been spent pacing around the room in anxiety and fiddling with the band around her neck that, no matter how she tried, wouldn't come undone.

She hesitated before calling out unevenly, though knowing full well who it was, "Wh-who is it?"

"It's us."

It was Mai and Ty Lee was with her. Green eyes frowned in frustration and panic and she quickly walked over and opened the door. The tall girl raised a thin brow.

"Well, nice to see that you're happy to see us," she droned out and Ty Lee smiled chirpily and gave a wave.

Toph mentally groaned and said out loud, "Well, it's nice to see that you'll be taking me to my death."

Mai snorted. "Relax, we'll be there the whole time."

"Yeah, and we'll make sure nothing bad happens," the acrobat added encouragingly. As they walked in, she suddenly clapped her hands enthusiastically and bounded over to the large wooden cupboard on the far side of the room. "Well, we'd better get started! I get to pick out your outfit!"

Two pairs of dark brows rose. "If it remotely resembles a dress, I am not wearing it."

Pale gold eyes rolled and Mai sighed. "Come on, you might as well take a bath first."

As the two girls left, the Earth Bender vaguely heard Ty Lee talking to herself, "Hm, maybe this skirt…or that one, that's pretty too! Oooh! I love those shoes…"

Green eyes rolled and Toph muttered bitterly to herself, "Now this is why I hate dinners."

Mai snorted and placed a hand onto the girl's shoulder, leading her down towards the bath rooms.

"Now you see why we rarely have parties. Ty Lee get's ecstatic."

Grimacing, Toph was reminded of the many parties she was forced to attend to when she was younger, due to her parents' positions and their wealth and faces in society. It was a disgusting process that involved much planning, tailoring, needles being stuck into places they shouldn't and heaps and heaps of material, each one in a different colour that she could not even see. It was pointless and a total waste of time and money. Being the nineteen-year-old girl she was now, she still did not like parties or bright, festive occasions.

"Parties are stupid," Toph pouted as they walked down a large flight of stairs.

"Oh very mature," Mai commented, rolling her golden orbs, but she said it with a hint of good humour, a small, almost unnoticeable upward curve to the corners of her lips.

The pink-clad girl laughed and danced around the two darker girls on her hands and said chirpily, "But this is going to be so much fun! We never get invited to dress up like tonight! Usually we just wear our usual outfits…which can be so boring after a while…"

"So you dress up! I don't see why I have to. I'm a prisoner aren't I?" the green-eyed girl protested, folding her arms.

The acrobat snorted. "And whoever said prisoners had to look like peasants? Besides, you've been dressed rather nicely so far and you haven't complained."

Toph shot her a pointed look. "You haven't put me in a dress so far. I don't do dresses."

Shrugging, Ty Lee smiled and patted the girl on the head. "We'll figure something out."

And it was moments like these that wanted to bring a smile to Toph's face. A smile of happiness and regret all mixed into one. She knew, even though it was only on a very basic level, and her trust in them was still extremely low, that it was bad to get close to them. She didn't want to be friends, and she cursed herself at letting her guard down every single time.

'Pull yourself together, Toph. You're stronger than this.'

She clenched her fists and remained silent the rest of the way, biting her lip. The frown slowly faded into a bitter expression.

'Then why is it so hard?'


A/N: Okay, done with this one too. Granted it's a little shorter than the others, but hey, what can I say? We need a little breather before we get into the action part right? Hm…I think the next few chapters will definitely be changed a LOT. But thanks to all my reviewers!! You guys are great! I'm sending you ALL a very yummy, very sticky virtual cookie :)

KEEP REVIEWING! :D

Peace out!
Rex