I don't own Inuyasha
It was weird. It had been two weeks since we came home from France. Inuyasha and I hadn't defined the relationship. We weren't talking much at all. It was sort of mutual. I avoided him as much as he seemed to be avoiding me. I couldn't help but feel crappy, considering we had such a nice time in the city of lights. As much as I hated to say it, I missed him. I craved his attention. I wanted to wake up in the romantic city in the arms of my secret lover. I had to convince myself that is was just another one of his flings. I wasn't special or different. It was just awkward now. I should've known better. I avoided all eye contact with him as we sat across from one another at a meeting.
Sesshomaru was droning off about some numbers and data. This didn't pertain to my area so I ignored it. That was the men's game here. I was not interested in numbers unless they had to do with the legal department or a contract. I was too busy trying not to make an ass out of myself. If my hooking up with Inuyasha got out in the office, I'd never be taken seriously here. I should've thought of that beforehand. But I didn't think he'd tell people… but I also didn't think he'd avoid me when we got back. I was clearly wrong about him in general, but then again it was still our secret. So maybe I could still have hope for him?
I pushed a strand of my hair behind my ear… Maybe I liked him? Okay, I did like him. Him not talking to me now was puzzling me. How was he so amazing in Paris and now just such a stranger? I felt like I got to know him a lot there. Was it just the city? Was it the fact that we were lonely? Was it even genuine? I bit my lip. This made me feel like a little girl all over again. I hated it. I couldn't believe I was a successful lawyer, yet still being played by men. Kouga never did this. He was straightforward and followed through. What had I done to make Inuyasha not want to see me anymore? Everything was great… I couldn't help the sigh that escaped my lips. Amber eyes checked on me, they weren't the eyes I was longing for. But I gave the older brother a small smile to let him know I was okay.
We even parted at the airport with a kiss. He said he'd call me, but that call never came. It made me feel cheap. I gave it up to someone that couldn't even look me in the face now. He hadn't looked at me in two weeks. I felt like I had been lied to and used. But then again, I willingly came into it. I wasn't a victim. I was just merely disappointed. I really thought he and I would actually become something or get somewhere. I really did think this one would be different from other men. I never pegged him as the hit it and quit it type. Or at least, I didn't think he'd use that idea on me.
I guess I was upset, more so at myself than him. I should've expected this from men by now. I shouldn't have been surprised or hurt. I knew what I was doing when I slept with him. I knew the risks. I knew that it could've just been the most mind-blowing sex I had ever had in my life and that it would go away just as quickly as it came. Was I regretting my decision? I wasn't sure. I could honestly argue both sides.
"Kagome?" Inutashio called my name. I look up to see my boss's face. His wise golden eyes seem to be starring into my soul. I feel like he could tell what I was thinking just by looking at me. The wise man reminded of my own father from what I could remember of him. I met his stare and gave him a polite nod to show that I acknowledged him. I wasn't in a talking mood today. I felt more like Sesshomaru today. "Did Patrice fax you the tax papers?"
I shook my head. "No, he said he'd send them to Inuyasha." My now apparent mistake shoots his head up at the sound of my saying his name. Oh, now you pay attention to me? I mentally rolled my eyes at him. I wasn't sulking anymore, now I was pissed off. "I do, however, have all the contacts and signatures. I could ring him up and ask for the tax documents again."
"Please Kagome, would you? I would've preferred to have them sooner. That Patrice is taking his time." The silver haired man asked, I could hear the annoyance in his voice in regards to Patrice. Inutashio was not known for his patience. He was never rude, but it was easy to tell when he was in a bad mood or irritated.
"I was supposed to have it by now, I'll do it—" Inuyasha butted in. He must've forgotten to talk to Patrice as well. Now he realized his mistake.
I frown. "It's fine. I'll have it on your desk in less than an hour," I said tonelessly. It was my best Sesshomaru impression I could muster. I made eye contact with Inuyasha as the words left my mouth.
Who did this guy think he was? Did he know whom he was dealing with? I wasn't some random hook up girl. I wouldn't be treated like it. And I would not let him have anything else over me. I was pissed. I was Kagome, a successful business lawyer and I wasn't having this. I wasn't going to allow him to make me feel this inferior. He was the one that was inferior. He was the one that couldn't rise to the challenge. He may as well been a real dog with his tail tucked between his legs. I was not taking kindly to being his Paris whore and a stranger in the office.
When the meeting ended I strutted out of the office as fast as I could. I could hear my heels clicking against the tile floors. I was probably the first one out of the conference room. But I didn't care at the moment. I had to get out of the office. I was done being surrounded and reminded of him. I walked up to my office in haste. There, I saw something I wasn't really prepared for. It ruined my drive. And by ruined my drive, I mean it turned my anger into complete surprise.
There stood my ex-boyfriend. I was floored. "Kouga?" My mouth is wide open.
He stood there with a dozen roses. His face seemed different. His icy blue eyes seemed to warm up at the sight of me. I couldn't believe it. He was even wearing a suit. Kouga hated suits. He was a wild child. He stood very tall, and had a grave look in his eye.
"Kagome," He whispered. It was so hard to even hear his voice say my name. It didn't sound right. It couldn't sound right after everything that had happened. Things just couldn't be the same. As quick as it was, I had moved on. If I really loved Kouga I wouldn't have been able to sleep with Inuyasha. I know that I don't love the man in front of me.
"You came from France?" I ask him, he must've been on tour still. There was no way he would just up and leave. It wasn't like him. The man lived for his art. He chose it above all else. Suddenly I realized I wasn't mad at him anymore. As odd as it sounded, I cared more about Inuyasha not calling me more than this situation.
"I was hoping we could talk over lunch or something…" His voice was lowered. He seemed so defeated. I couldn't help but feel bad. I bit my lip and walked over to him.
"Kouga," I hug him lightly. He pulls me into his strong grasp. I'm not surprised by his act. But I do admit it is familiar. I take in his smell. He smells like the perfume I got him last Christmas. He smells like home. I can't help but crack a little bit. He was thinking of me, while I was with another man. It wasn't either of our faults. I try to summon the part of me that would always love him. But to my avail, I found it difficult. It wasn't a part of me I wanted to access.
He lets me go. "I've missed you,"
"You have a funny way of showing it." I retort without thinking. Dammit, too quick for my own good.
He puts on a sly grin, "I even miss those comments. Kagome, c'mon, just have lunch with me, we can talk everything out and decide what we want to do from there. I came all this way just to try and fix it."
That was true. I had to give him credit. "Fine," I said. I go behind my desk to reach for my purse. Kouga places my roses on one of my file cabinets. "I have a vase," I smiled at his antics. He was always so awkward; it was something I loved about him. I walk out of my office quickly and find a vase and fill it with water. I returned to my office to see him sitting on my desk patiently with a wolfish grin on his tanned face. "What are you so smiley about?" I ask him jokingly. I never knew what was going on in that head of his.
"I have a new song for you," He broke the grin, it became the biggest smile of all time. I couldn't help but blush. "I'm not releasing it without your approval, of course. I just want you to hear it."
I nod my head, and motion him over to my desktop. He starts to fiddle with the computer while I put my roses away. I start hearing this beautiful melody being played on the guitar; I could tell it was him playing it and not his brother. This was more Kouga's type of artistry. (Song: Roses by James Arthur, Disclaimer: I don't own it, just a fan, 10/10 recommend listening to the song, it's awesome.) I hear his raspy voice come to life in the speakers.
"I could've chose anybody but I chose you, ooh ooh. Help me get better, you pull me right out of the blue oh oh. And daddy don't like you, but daddy and I never speak. Every night when I wake up I need you to get back to sleep." I stood listening to the lyrics, without noticing I start swaying to the music.
Kouga shyly stalks up to me, and offers me a hand. I can't help the smile on my face. He's a dork. I let him take me. He leads me in front of my desk. Slowly, he places his hands on the crook of my back. It feels like he's done it a hundred times. My arms wrap around his neck instinctively. We do this little two-step sway in circles. I wouldn't even qualify it as real dancing. We were just feeling the music.
"Smells like roses to me, two young lovers at sea. Tastes so bitter, so sweet. You're my bang, together we go bang bang bang, bang bang bang, bang bang bang oh oh, oh oh."
My eyes tear up at the choir. The roses were fitting after all. I find the acoustic guitar to be relaxing. His voice sounds so hurt throughout the song, I could feel it. This was his apology. He was never one for words, but his music always spoke for him. Kouga meant what he wrote. He did love me, he was sorry. I put my head on his chest, and he pulls me closer. I could feel the tears forming in my eyes, but I didn't want to let them go. I didn't want him to hear me cry.
"You could've chose anybody but you chose me, hiding in bedsits cause no one around us agrees. And I feel romantic cause since morning I've been at the wine. Shall we eat all the poison and leave all the questions behind?"
This haunting female voice comes in. I couldn't hold the tears back. He wanted me, with all the bad that came. He didn't care about the fight. He just wanted me. He wanted to get through it. I start to tune out the song because I look up into his eyes. He is starring into mine. Before I knew it the choir was finished again.
"And all the chemicals and alcohol make for a volatile love but stay with me, just stay with me. And I never wanna lose you but I feel that this closeness will tear us apart. But stay with me, stay with me." Kouga sings to me softly.
We stop dancing, he just holds me as the song comes to a finish. I'm balling my eyes out at this point. It was beautiful. I couldn't believe he did that for me. "I love it." I finally let out. Just as I say that a beautiful silver haired man walks in. My heart drops immediately. I couldn't believe this was happening to me.
"Inuyasha," I breathe out.