AN: Sorry I did not get to reply to reviews like I would have liked to. The holidays, a death in the family, and Thanksgiving 2 and 3... been kinda busy. Anyway.. here we go again and thanks for sticking with me.

SPOV

Penny had suggested that I go home and get cleaned up. I really didn't relish in the idea of leaving her but the thought of using a shower other than my own did fill me with discomfort. As I said before, I may not be a complete freak but one still has to worry about such things as athletes foot from an uncared for shower floor. That I could not tolerate.

Just as Penny seemed to drift off to sleep I stepped out into the hall and called Raj to see if he would come and pick me up. Of course he was more than willing to help in any way possible. He really was a good person but his over eagerness reminded me of a puppy ready to nip at your feet to try to play with you. I stood in the hall and watched the hustle and bustle of the staff going from room to room checking on people, making rounds, conversing in idle chit chat, and so on and wondered just how it was that I got here.

I was well aware of the day that Penny became a part of my life. My memory would never let me forget. However, what I was failing to remember was when Penny became such an important part of my life. I began to recall all of the times that she had been there for me when the others had failed to. She let me stay with her when I was locked out of my apartment. She took care of me when I was sick and my 'friends' went to see a movie marathon at the local cinema. She took me shopping for that horrible tuxedo that I ended up not wearing for most of the night. And she tried to help me date. But now that I think back on it, that relationship with Amy was doomed from the start because Penny was already there. She was already in her spot in me. Where that was, I'm not sure.

Feeling as though I had muddled through my thoughts as best I could with no foreseeable resolution to my conundrum I re-entered her room to wait for my ride. I noticed right away that something was a miss.

Her breathing was shallow and her monitors were off. Her face seemed pale. I walked over to touch her and her hands felt cold. I pressed my fingers to her neck to feel for her pulse and it was not normal. It seemed to beat only once every few seconds. Something was horribly wrong. My body jolted into action before my mind could catch up. I shook her body, pinched her arms, legs, hips anything trying to get a reaction out of her. There was nothing. I needed help.

I ran from her bedside and out of the door and shouted to anyone who would listen.

"Something is wrong! We need help in here now!" Nurses sprang into action and followed me back into her room to assess the situation. One nurse said to call her doctor while another turned on the monitors to reveal an alarmingly low heart rate and pulse ox. 35 BMP and 56% oxygen. Oh god.

There was a flurry of motion around me as people came and went. Her doctor came in yelling about her oxygen being turned off and a nurse hastily turned in back on. He ordered a defibrillator be brought in and I strangely recall hearing myself yell at her, demanding that she come to, wake up and yell back at me.

"What is happening?" I demanded. No one seemed to pay me any mind as they all rushed to her aide. All I could do way pray, to a god I do no believe in, that she would be ok. My mother would do this so why couldn't I? Because I am a man of science and my friend, my... Penny was dying.

"Wait! She's coming back!" Someone shouted. I looked over at the screens and things seemed to be normalizing. 75% oxygen and 65BPM and climbing. 80%, 90%, 92%. She was coming back. Her chest began to rise and fall with normal consistency. Then suddenly my body froze in terror. She let out a blood curdling scream. A scream of a person being tortured in a way no person should ever feel. Was this normal? I stepped back and looked at the shocked faces of the people around me.

And just as suddenly the screams stopped and her eyes fluttered open and asked, "What's going on?" as if nothing at happened. Her eyes were confused to see so many people around her and I wished I could forget, just as she had, that this had ever happened.

The doctor explained to her, to us, what happened and my hand reached for hers again and I felt a tear fall from my eyes. The idea of losing her was right up there with my mother or my Meemaw, I felt a pain I didn't know I could feel for someone who was not blood wash over me and I didn't care that I was showing emotion others normally wouldn't see. Penny was different. She saw me for who I was not who I pretended. So I wouldn't pretend for her anymore.

Everyone left the room and we were alone. She gripped my hand tighter and I sat down on the bed facing her. The ridiculous day time programming was still floating around the room but her eyes spoke louder than anything Dr. Phil or whoever it was had to say.

"Sheldon, I almost died?"

"Yes. I came back into your room to wait for Raj and noticed your breathing to be irregular. I can only assume when they unhooked you from your monitors after your therapy today they failed to hook them back up. You should be grateful I came back when I did." She reached up and wiped at the tear that fell from my eye and I didn't back away. I wanted her to touch me. I wanted to be reassured that she was still here.

"Thank you." She looked around at the monitors and watched as her actions changed the numbers on the screens. She seemed so fine with the fact that she nearly died. How could she be okay with this? I certainly was not.

"Penny, I do not think it wise that I leave you again."

"You can't stay here every hour of every day with me. They will watch me more closely. You have work to do." She was right.

"Yes, although there are some thing that I could do here others would require the space of my office. If, and only if, I am satisfied with your new location then will I consider leaving again. If not you will have a twenty four hour watch." She laughed at me. Suddenly her face turned serious.

"Please don't tell the others. I don't want to them to worry." I sighed heavily.

"I may not have the facial ticks that I claimed to accompany my inability to tell a lie I still have a strong disdain for lying. Growing up in a Christian Texas home one thing that is drilled into you from birth is honesty is everything. To lie is to sin. I can't not tell the others why you have been moved nor can I not tell them why your stay in the hospital will most certainly be extended. Although I won't tell Leonard. He will likely have to hear it from someone else."

"Sweetie, just leave out the part about me almost dying. Okay?" I nodded. I guess I could manage that. Just then her brows scrunched together as if she were deep in thought. "What happened between you and Leonard while I was in here?" I dropped her hand and stood up to stand in front of her bed.

"Leonard's emotional complexes were out of line. He tried to make this about him because he was not here with you and I was. I have had a lot of time to think about my friendship with Leonard and I am not entirely satisfied with the way things have been going these last few years. I have been working on a new roommate agreement for next quarter. I do not think he will be happy." I smirked. "Probably about as happy as Priya was when she was no longer then center of his attention." Penny laughed.

"I can't believe I was once jealous of what they had."

"I still can't believe that after years of proving him right over and over again he thought I would be wrong when I said you two never had a chance. Well, I guess he was right for a short period of time." I rested my hands on the end of the bed and leaned closer to her. "What were you thinking?" I had to ask. She sighed loudly and I regretted bringing up something that might upset her. Before I could dismiss my question she shocked me by answering.

"Most of the men that I had dated previously were dumb jock assholes that just wanted to get into my pants. I thought Leonard was different." She admitted sheepishly.

"Well the only one of those descriptions he doesn't fit is 'jock'. The first day we met you he claimed you for his own without any knowledge of who you were as a person or if you would make an ideal mate." I explained. I knew this wasn't news to her. Raj let it slip after a night of drinking.

"What did you think of me?" She asked through hooded eyes. I wanted so badly to answer her. Was it the time?

"Penny, shouldn't we discuss this later?" She looked hurt.

"There is no reason for you to hide from me. I've seen the differences in you that others overlook. I know when someone says something sexually inappropriate you blush slightly and not because you are annoyed. I know that when you think no one is looking you will eat peanut butter right out of the jar. And I know when you walked up the stairs when Leonard and I were kissing in the hallway you looked shocked and hurt. Regardless of the time or the place of the discussion it needs to happen."

"Everyone eats peanut butter out of the jar." I countered.

"Not 'Sheldon Cooper'" She said with those frustrating air quotations. I grunted and paced the small area in front of her bed.

"Four years with me and you can see what Leonard can not in seven. It's no wonder he's an awful physicist. Okay, if it will put an end to this discussion until you have your strength back then I will indulge you. When I first saw you I thought you were attractive. I was embarrassed to be seen with that bumbling fool of a roommate of mine and the repeated 'hi's. But I was still Crazy Sheldon Cooper so I pushed it aside rather than pushed him aside." She smiled. "After that I found that you were invading parts of my mind that I was not ready for you to be in. I was forced to condition myself to keep you out of my thoughts merely because you were pleasant to admire. It was wrong and I am ashamed of the lustful thoughts. So I trained my mind to keep you out. Then you began to spend more time with us. You began a part of the group. I began to see the kind of person you were. You were not put off by my crazy antics, quirks, or ticks like the others but challenged them. You were there for me when my friends were not. You aided my while I was sick and offered assistance whenever I needed it. You were a constant the others never seemed to want to be. You rarely ever turned me away unless I was trying to get you to do so. So I began to condition harder. I would focus on complex equations that had no merit to my work just to keep my mind off of you.

"I'm not the nearly the crazy theoretical physicist I claim to be and only do that to keep people away. The effects of the experiment backfired with you. Raj is the only other person that knows about any of this. I figured since I knew I would be having the conversation again in the near future I hypothesized that I would need to rehearse the conversation. Given the people in my life, Howard only here because of Bernadette's concern for you and Leonard trying desperately to make the situation about himself, Raj seemed like the obvious choice. He's actions have always indicated a strong emotional attachment to his friends and the need for acceptance so I was not concerned about telling him. However, looking back it would have made sense to tell someone unbiased. Maybe my barber but I'm not due for a hair cut anytime soon and given the circumstances I don't believe it would be appropriate." She listened intently. Her eyes were clear and focused and not glassy and confused as they had been only moments ago. I wondered how much of this she would remember.

"Basically, what I am getting at is that you were more important to me than I wanted you to be. And when you saw me outside of my normal persona and tried your own experiment I was terrified. I had every intention of trying to push you at arms length but just needed to figure out how. Then I got the message from Leonard about the accident and everything vaporized. The lies, the cover ups, the need to keep you away. It didn't matter anymore. My reaction to what happened told me everything I needed to know." She was crying slightly.

"And what is that?" She asked, her voice hitching slightly. The door opened before I could respond. I don't even know what I was going to say. What I going to say that I loved her? Was I going to tell her I needed her?

"I'm sorry but I need to ask you to leave. We need to try to get her to use the bathroom and then we will be moving her." She looked alarmed.

"And just how am I going to go to the bathroom?" She demanded. The nurse held up a bedpan and smiled sadly. "Oh, god." She whispered. She looked at me for comfort but I could offer none. "I don't want you to be here for this." I nodded.

"I'll be outside. I need to make another call to Raj anyway. I will not be leaving as planned." I bowed my head slightly and stepped out of her door just to the right. It was cracked so I could hear everything. I dialed Raj's number and he answered promptly.

"I'm almost there, dude. What's up?"

"There has been a change of plans." I heard her scream out. They were lifting her lower half trying to assist her as best they could. "I'm staying here."

"What happened?" His voice sounded honestly concerned.

"There were complications and her breathing was slightly compromised. They are moving her to a more closely watched unit to avoid any further events but until I am satisfied with everything I will not be leaving her. However, I do need to speak to a few people in this current department so I need you to stay with her. You are the only person I would trust to do so and her father will be here soon but not soon enough. These matters need to be dealt with now." Raj let out of a nervous laugh.

"I know you're different but you're not going to try to kill anyone are you?"

"Oh, dear lord Rajesh. I'm not even going to answer that question. Can I rely on you to stay with Penny or not?"

"Yes, I'll be there soon." He hung up the phone and I waited for her to be wheeled out of her room. Her new one was only a few doors down. My confidence was not rising at all. I had a feeling I would be here for the next week or so whether I wanted to be or not. I looked at the text messages on my phone.

Penny's dad will be arriving at LAX at 6pm. I'll bring him straight to the hospital. I assume I will be able to see her.

We'll see, Leonard. We'll see. I watched though the window of her new door as they hooked everything up properly and dialed the number to the super of our building. That elevator would need to be fixed immediately.

AN: Things will start to pick up after the next probably two chapters. I have a few more things I want to put in here and then it'll be life getting back to normal... well... the new normal.