Hi there, up to Chapter 6 actually I thought this was the last one but there's one more... Hope you enjoy it. Thank you for the reviews.

Chapter 6

"Oh My God what did I do?" I turned and flew out of the window so fast Edward didn't realise I was gone until a few seconds later.

That was all the head start I needed. I ran faster than I had ever run before. I flew up the mountain and over the ranges and I didn't stop until I was sure Edward hadn't followed. I must have run for miles. If I didn't need my breath I am sure I would have run out long before now. I slowed down once I reached the river and fell to the ground. I listened carefully but I could hear nothing out of the ordinary, just a few wild animals grazing further ahead. I would deal with them later.

I couldn't believe I kissed him, how could I be so stupid. All these years knowing that he hated me and I acted like a complete and utter .... "IDIOT" I screamed out my new label because I knew it would only sink in if I said it out loud. I fell back on the grass so I was lying in the sun. Why was I so stupid to do that to myself. "WHY?" I felt stupid screaming at myself but I was so angry nothing would help me at this moment. I laid there and started to cry, a tearless cry but I cried for my pain, I cried for the loss of Charlie and Renee and I cried for the loss of my new family, but mostly I cried for myself. I couldn't stop crying it had taken so much out of me and I didn't believe I would ever get through this. If I wasn't immortal I would surely be dead by now, dead from a broken heart. I felt so much pain and anxiety inside of me I yelled yet again, into the silent forest that could not help me any more."Sorry Carlisle you can't fix me any more"

"I hate you Edward Cullen I hate you", I sobbed, I couldn't even bring myself to scream out in rage any more. I was broken, lost and broken, I laid my arm across my face and waited until the night would take me away.

"I hope you don't mean that?" Edward's velvet voice echoed through the small clearing by the river where I had collapsed. I tried to will my body to get up and run since it hadn't taken him long to find me. Surely if I ran faster he wouldn't catch me again. But in all honesty, I had nothing left, nothing at all, my spirit was broken.

"Edward go away, just let me die please"

"You can't die Silly Bella, you're already dead" Edward had a smirk on his face and if I wasn't so spent I would have hit him, still might be a good idea though...

"Well go away and let me finish what I started so long ago. Edward just walk away, you did it once I am sure you can do it again" I knew that was hitting below the belt, but I really couldn't care if he was hurt because nothing compared to the pain I was feeling and had felt thanks to Edward Cullen.

"Bella, we need to talk about that" Edward laid down on the ground next to me.

"NO Edward, I can't talk to you anymore, I can't talk about this anymore, I can't talk......... about pain anymore" I ended with a whisper because I knew I couldn't hold my voice together. He touched my arm so I would pull it away from my face and now he could see the stress I was under and he knew that it wasn't going to be easy to fix his.

EPOV (finally)

I ran through the forest at an incredible speed, even for me. It had taken me a good 20 seconds to realise she had gone out the window, unfortunately she would have a good lead but I wasn't giving up. When I came in and saw her on the lounge, looking so beautiful, so perfect and so DEAD, I freaked. I couldn't believe they would go behind my back.

Never in a million years would I have thought Carlisle did it to save her and not just kill her. I am so stupid, I should have realised. But then when the first words out of her beautiful mouth were Emmett, I felt like I was losing it. She looked so tiny in his huge arms and so helpless. It should have been me comforting her and protecting her, not my brother, not my married brother at that. I scanned his thoughts and realised his only held pure thoughts for her and I was sorry I overacted. When everyone sat down to talk, Alice was doing a good job at blocking me from seeing her thoughts. Only letting through some of the most intense ones of her change. I knew she knew something else because she was too quiet and she was doing an exceptional job of blocking me. Very unlike my pixie sister. I couldn't get through her barrier, so I scanned everyone else's mind.

Rose was furious with me and I could feel the energy waves coming off her. Emmett and Jasper were impossible to read especially since they were holding her hand. I couldn't read them at all, they were as silent to me as she had always been. Esme was completely distraught and I couldn't make sense of anything she was thinking.

I listened to Carlisle tell me about Bella and all the things that had happened to her since I left. I was feeling such guilt and pain that I couldn't explain it. I thought that I had lost her again but this time forever. Then everything changed in a single split second. Bella turned to talk to me. The first thing she had said to me directly since I got back and Alice touched her shoulder to support her. It was at this time Alice let her guard slip. I only caught a split second of the image but I knew what it was and I knew Bella would be mine forever.

Now I had to find her and convince her that I loved her still. I followed her unique scent through the forest. Luckily she had returned my kiss because it had intensified her scent on me and made it easier to follow as well as giving me even more hope. I found her laying near a river quite a fair way from our home. I knew she was still a new born and it was normal but I couldn't help but feel proud of my Bella. I watched her as she sobbed, I was just about to go to her when I heard her scream out 'idiot'. I wasn't sure if she meant me so I stepped back and waited. 'Why' followed her scream and then more sobs and it wasn't until she spoke so clearly that she hated me that I snapped back to reality. I walked silently over to her and watched as she laid down with her arm folded over her face. I really wanted to see her face actually I needed to see her face.

"I hope you don't mean that" please don't mean it Bella please please please don't mean it. I thought she would run but I was ready to grab her if she did. She didn't though she just laid there sad and broken. Never did I want to see my Bella broken again, and I was doing it to her again. Did I ever learn? She told me to leave her and let her die. I tried to see if she would have a laugh but she didn't instead she hit me where it hurt, she hit below the belt. She threw it back in my face, that I left her so many years ago.

"Bella we need to talk about that" I hoped she would let me have the chance to explain, I had to believe she would. I had to have faith in my sister's vision, Alice had never let me down before. I touched her arm and hoped she would let me see her beautiful face. I looked at her and knew I had to fix this, she had to know how I felt and the only way I could do that was to show her what she meant to me. I leant down until I was hovering above her face. I waited, hoping she would give me permission to continue.

The hardest thing was she didn't pull away, she didn't take my face in her delicate, beautiful hands, no she just laid there like the broken spirit she was. It tore me up inside and my urgency to show Bella how much I loved her came out in a rush. I leant down and pressed my lips into hers, I waited for a reaction like the one back in my room, but, it didn't come. I was defeated, I had lost her. I couldn't fix what I had broken so long ago.

How stupid was I to believe she would think everything would be fine when I came back. I pulled back from her face and put a tendril of hair behind her ear. I looked at the rest of her hair and started clearing out the leaves that had tangled their way into her beautiful hair. I lifted it up and smelt it one more time. I inhaled deeply and let the pain of loss come over me once again.

"Bella I am sorry, obviously you don't want me anymore and I completely understand. I am sorry I exposed you to all of this and now you have to endure the curse we have."

I took her tiny hands in mine and kissed them both and laid them back on her stomach where they were resting before. I looked into her eyes and she was looking at me with such desperation, it tore me up inside.

"Bella I look into your eyes, and I still see those beautiful eyes you had before I came and ruined your life. I look at your hair and it still feels as soft to me as it did the day I first touched it. I look at your hands and remember the day you placed them against my chest. I look at your mouth and I see your cries of pain when I said goodbye to you, then I look at your eyes again and see the pain I put there. Nothing will ever erase that look, I am sorry. I will be forever sorry and I just hope one day you can forgive me and remember the good times we did have" I looked into her eyes and kissed them both, I kissed her nose and then kissed her lips so gently. I had my hand over her stomach and around her waist and tightened my hold on her as I kissed her. I knew this would be the last time so I had to relish every last second I had with my beautiful Bella. I didn't deepen the kiss, I wanted it to be sweet, like she was to me. I was about to pull away when I felt her tiny hand touch my arm. I couldn't help myself so I pulled back so I could see her eyes.

"Did you ever love me Edward?" Her voice was so quiet I would have missed it if I were human.

"Bella I love you more than I have ever loved anyone in all my one hundred years, I loved you before and I still love you now"

"But you said you didn't, you said you lied to me" Bella's eyes showed the depth of her pain

"Bella I had to lie, I thought it was for your own safety and I never would have thought that leaving you could have created the abyss I felt in my soul everyday I was away from you" I hoped she would understand why I did it.

"Edward I tried, I really tried to live without you but when you left, you took my soul with you and I couldn't live like that. I wanted to die. That was my only escape. I am sorry you had to come back to this, this broken piece of whatever I am" I couldn't believe she was apologising to me.

"Bella you have nothing to apologise for, I am sorry I should have never left you. But I did believe you were better off without me. I can see I was wrong and I hope one day you will find it in your heart to forgive me" My head had dropped down to lay on her stomach and then I felt her hands in my hair. I took a deep breath and stilled my body's reaction to her. I didn't want to blow it by scaring her now. She continued to run her fingers through my hair and I wished this moment would never end.

"Edward do you love someone else?" I jumped up and looked her in the eyes. How could she even think that, it was absurd.

"What Bella?" It was the only sentence my brain could spit out.

"I understand you know, its been a long time and I .... I just wanted to know" She wouldn't look into my eyes, so I placed my fingers under her chin and turned her face to look into mine.

"Bella Swan, I love you now and forever. There has never been anyone else nor would there ever be anyone else" I hoped she could see the sincerity in my eyes. She just looked at me and I really felt I had lost her therefore I had nothing to live for now. Then by some small miracle she smiled, just a small smile but a smile all the same. I felt bolder and leant in to capture those beautiful lips once more.

Ok guys what do you think???

Only one more chapter to go, please review ;-)