It'd almost been two weeks since Kakashi had been back to Rin's house after running out of there like a scared dog after he realized what he had done. He hadn't seen her since and made a special effort to stay out of her daily routine. He made all of his appointments after Rin's shift was over and he was sure she had left the Hospital. He even asked the receptionist to keep his appointment book on a separate shelf from the appointments that Rin supervised so she wouldn't see when he was coming.

He felt ill all the time, partly from the painkillers and mostly from the guilt. It gnawed at him, chewing a hole through him.

When he was with Rin it had all gone away, the hurt, the fear the pain, all of it. Then afterwards it all flooded over him ten fold. He betrayed Obito by doing this. Obito loved Rin. He would have given her the world if she had given him the chance. Kakashi felt like he had just blind sided anything Obito had asked him to do in complete disregard for anything and it made him feel sick. His head hung sadly with the next thought that had weighed on his mind very heavily over the last few days.

He'd used Rin.

Despite her constant assurances that he had done nothing wrong, he felt like he had used her. He was sedated and feeling sorry for himself and tried to soothe whatever he was going through with sex. He'd done it before and succeeded but Rin was different.

Rin was his friend. The only friend he had left. He felt like the scum of the earth even before he saw the blood.

Rin had been a virgin and he took it away from her just to make himself feel better for a little while. The one thing that was hers to give to a man that she loved he took just because he could. She hadn't said anything to him, but then again he hadn't given her the chance. He started rambling and apologizing profusely before taking off, leaving her holding the sheets over her and undoubtedly humiliated.

He sat down on the bank next to the old red bridge, absently plucking the green blades beneath him as he watched the river flow towards whatever destination it was headed. He'd royally fucked up this time.

He heard someone coming over the bridge and cursed when he saw his intruder. It was Rin.

She was still wearing her uniform which told him she had just gotten off work. It was usual. She usually did her errands before she went home and changed. He noticed her dark hair braided in twin pig tails that laid against her head. He wasn't used to seeing her with braids of any kind. She usually didn't mess with her hair. She only did when their was an occasion or she got bored. She had a mailbag and her purse looped over her shoulder and a puppy in the other arm. The dog was white with brown ears and brown masking its eyes.

"Tsume's. I'm bringing Akamaru home in a couple of weeks."

It was probably the dog she was talking about. He felt his heart beat hasten as she approached him. He stood up as she got closer in respect, looking at her and then down to his feet, still ashamed of his actions.

"You've been avoiding me." She told him, her head cocked to the side.

"I wasn't sure if you want to see me. Not after what I did." He replied lamely, ringing his hands.

"That's ridiculous, Kakashi. Of course I wanted to see you. You're my friend." She said, wrapping her arms around him in a hug after she had sat the puppy and her things down next to her.

"I'm so sorry." He apologized again. He swallowed. "I didn-

He was surprised when Rin's hand connected with the side of his head, opposite of his wounded eye, knocking him slightly off balance.

"Stop apologizing." She demanded. "I swear, if you apologize one more time for something I wanted to do for you in the first place then I'm not going to give you the cake in my bag."

"What?" He asked, confused.

"Yeah, I brought cake. I know you don't much care for sweets, but 'Kashi it's really good."

"No. Not the cake. You wanted to do it for me?"

"Yeah. It wasn't like you raped me. I wanted it too. Sure as hell beat sleeping." She added, smiling at the look in Kakashi's revealed eye. She reached up and pulled his mask off of his face. He held his breath at the serious look on her face. Rin was rarely serious. "Look," She said gently. "You aren't the only one hurting. You weren't the only one who wanted to escape. I wanted it too" She explained.".- I just wanted to help you, Kakashi. It was frustrating seeing you like that."

"You're not mad?" He asked. He felt like he deserved to be stabbed through the chest with a kunai. He felt like he needed to be punished.

"The only thing I'm mad about is you avoiding me." She said gently, releasing his mask so he could put it back on his face. She sat down next to the bank like he had only a few minutes ago. He followed suit. "It's pretty isn't it?" She asked him as she leaned on his shoulder.

"Are you sure you're all right? You're not mad at me?" He asked as he stiffened when he felt her touch.

"If I was mad would I have brought cake?" She asked, sitting up and reaching for her almost forgotten bag. She had stopped by the bakery and bought a huge piece of chocolate mud slide cake. Kakashi had gotten distracted by Akamaru hiding down behind a tall weed, getting ready to pounce on a grass hopper as she reached in and produced the chocolate treasure.

"-Here." She said, nudging him with her elbow to get his attention.

He took the hefty piece of cake from her and Akamaru came over and climbed into her lap. "-Akamaru, I presume?" He asked before he took a bite.

"Yeah, that's 'Kamaru. He just turned three weeks old."

"Only three?"

"Yeah. I've got his bottles and stuff in the bag. Tsume wanted me to go ahead and take him even though he's still a little young. Are you goin' to eat it or not?"

"Oh, yeah." He said, before turning his attention back to the cake and taking a bite of it. His stomach growled in appreciation. It was quite possibly the best cake he had ever had. She was right like always. It was good. He mumbled a thanks before he resumed stuffing his face. He felt his spirit lighten as he heard her giggling in amusement.

He turned back towards the river as she laid her head back down on his shoulder. He swallowed and looked down at her, noticing the daisy chain that was around her neck. "What's that?" He asked, poking it lightly.

"A daisy chain. One of my patients made it for me. It's for good luck." She said, twirling it between her fingers, conveniently forgetting to tell him the luck was for her baby. She cleared her throat. " 'Kashi, we have to talk about something. There's something I need to tell you."

"What?" He asked before he took another bite to show he was paying attention.

"You know about the Nakaue clan, right?"

"Yeah, they're a Fire clan, nobles. They're kind of weird though. They breed with other clans so you never know what Nakaue has what ability. There's really no individual trait to the clan. No real bloodline."

"Yeah. I went to Sensei's office today. He was telling me about the war treaty."

"Since when did he talk to you about his Hokage duties?" Kakashi asked, getting suspicious.

"Since it included me. I've agreed to surrogacy for the Nakaue's." She said, quickly completely forgetting what she had rehearsed to tell him to make that sound any better..

He swallowed thickly and laid the plate down on the grass next to him before looking at her with a certain intent. Almost like an intent to make her take her words back. She absently tightened her grip on Akamaru who had climbed into her lap. She felt her hands start to shake as the fear of Kakashi's reaction came back. She was fairly sure that he didn't know about the death rate among the Nakaue child-bearers. She was also fairly confident it was the medicine there and that as long as she stayed in Konoha she would be fine.

"What?" He asked, his revealed eye fixed on her, giving her the chills.

I've agreed to surrogacy for the Nakaue's. It's a part of the Cold War peace treaty."

"Tell them no." He told her again.

"I can't Kakashi. The deal's already been made." She told him, studying his features for any clue to his reaction.

"They can't take you!" He said rather loudly. His tone was mean, mean enough to cause her to shy away and Akamaru to whimper in fear. "Tell them no!"

"I can't!" She told him, finding her voice. "What? You don't understand that a deal's a deal?! I figured that you would at least understand that!" She yelled, feeling slightly betrayed.

She knew that he would take it badly, but he hadn't even given her the chance to explain.

"What happened?! Did they single you out?! The clan?! What happened, Rin?! What about the Inuzuka clan makes it good enough for the Nakaue's?" He asked, wanting the answer to all five of his questions and not getting it fast enough.

"Yeah! Believe it or not, my clan is really valuable! People respect my clan!" She screamed back.

He'd upset her but didn't pull back from their fight. He hadn't meant the Inuzuka's weren't worth it. They were strong on the battlefield and he wanted an Inuzuka with him rather than against him. He didn't want the Inuzuka bloodline in the Nakaue clan. He didn't want Rin in the Nakaue clan. The idea of her bearing some strange man's child upset him. He didn't want anyone to touch her, especially the Nakaue's. He was supposed to protect her, damn it.

"You're not old enough!" He growled, unwilling to lose the argument.

"I'm of age in my clan!" She said gathering her things and Akamaru."- and I am certainly not a child." She spat before stomping off in the direction of her house, her bags and the puppy in tow.

He sat back down on the bank, picking his cake back up when he spotted the daisy chain. It must have broke off during their argument. He carefully picked up the necklace, twirling it between his fingers. He felt the huge wave of guilt wash over him.

Why had he done that? She had come to him undoubtedly seeking solace and understanding. She wanted the same thing in return that she gave him every time he needed it and he had been selfish enough to deny her that. She went through great lengths to help him through whatever he was going through. Whatever she was handling, she probably couldn't do it all alone. It probably scared the hell out of her. The idea of having a baby for the Nakaue's: having a baby at all. She needed his support and he hadn't given it to her.

What the hell was he thinking?

He stopped by his apartment after he finished the cake Rin had given him. He got a piece of paper and a pen and scribbled out a note before he headed out for Rin's place.

He wasn't stupid. He wasn't going to try to get her to let him in. He had no false fallacy that she would let him in her home after that fight. Rin didn't fight without a reason and didn't quickly forget. She was a lot like him.

Right now, he wasn't asking for that. He just want to return the good luck charm to her. She needed it more than he did. It was rightfully hers anyway.

He laid the daisy chain down on her front porch with a neatly folded piece of paper. He knocked on her door and then disappeared within a cloud of smoke.

She opened the door, wiping the tears roughly out of her eyes. Damn Kakashi for this. She realized no one was there and started to shut the door before the daisy chain caught her eye. She picked it up along with the paper. She opened it carefully, not wanting to tear the corners. She recognized the handwriting as Kakashi's.

Rin,

I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it.

Come talk to me when you're ready. I promise I'll listen. You know where I am.

Kakashi