Three weeks. I have been here for three weeks. I counted the days. I marked them in the dirt in the corner. And to think I thought I was going to be out of here the first day I was brought here. This man, this guy, he is evil. He is THE definition of evil. I refuse to call him by his name. I refer to him as HIM or HE. He takes his anger out on me. He is the ultimate manipulator. He does things, makes mistakes, and blames them on me. The thing about it is, sometimes I do believe it is my fault. Deep down I know it isn't but maybe I was brainwashed by him. Can you be brainwashed if you know you are brainwashed? I guess it depends.

I learned things in the time I was here. I have become an expert at cooking and sewing. I had some skill before when it came to cooking but now I was a damn chef. I made a joke. I could almost laugh. Almost.

Sewing was a whole different story. I did not know a damn thing about sewing besides that fact that you have to thread the needle. I didn't even know how to do that. I thought of the memory of the first time he made me:

He was trying to move something, a bookcase, I think it was, and it caught on his shirt and ripped it.

"Shit!" He yelled. I jumped. I always jump when he yells. I cringe when he gets close. He looked down at the tear and then at me with his evil, angry face. I knew I was going to get hit. He slapped me right across the face making me fall to the floor. I touched my face then looked up at him. "You see this?" He showed me the hole. "You're gonna fix this for me now!" He took his shirt off and threw it at me then left the room for a moment. I whimpered in fear that he was going to come back with the fire poke. Instead he brought a container. He dropped it next to me, the lid come open spilling the contents out. It was sewing materials. "Fix the hole." He said.

I whimpered again because I was afraid to tell him I didn't know how. "B-but…" I trailed off.

"Yes?" He walked closer to me.

"…I-I don't know how to sew." I looked up at him, the fear was evident on my face.

"Figure it out!" He yelled then walked away.

With shaky hands, I threaded the needle and taught myself to sew.

It was difficult at first but now it's cake. I have to say, though…all this time, I wondered why didn't he just get another shirt? Clothes are one of the easier things to find these days.

I also know how to do stitches. After learning to sew, stitches just came naturally to me. I had to stitch him up the one day. I recalled that memory as well:

He came back from a run or something. Walked right over to me, didn't say a word, just slapped me hard. Then, he showed me his hand. He had a pretty bad cut. "Let's clean that up for you." I said. I washed the old blood away then cleaned it.

"Ow, that burns." He shouted at me. He slapped me upside the head. I continued what I was doing. Once the wound was clean, I started the stitches. "Ow, you idiot!" He slapped me a bunch of times in the head. I was unfazed by it.

"There all done." I said.

He examined it, I waited in anticipation for his approval. Finally, he nodded. "Good job."

"Thank you." I said.

You believe that? I fixed his wound and then thanked him. And after he beat me. I have already accepted my fate. I knew that if I didn't get out of here, then he will eventually kill me. And I had no hope that I was going to get out of here.

"It's ready." I said. I got a bowl of soup for him and sat it in front of him at the table. Then, I did the same for myself. I sat down across from him. I noticed he didn't try his food yet. "Aren't you hungry?"

"It's a bit too hot. I'm letting it cool." He said calmly.

I nodded. I eyed the fire poke leaning up against the counter and became nervous. I was always only one word, one comment or look away from getting it. "So…did you find anything interesting on your run today?"

He nodded. "I found some barbed wire." He took it out of his bag that was next to him on the floor and sat it on the counter. "I want to start making a fence around my property. It will help to keep the dead away."

"Good idea." I said. He eyed me suspiciously. I became nervous and bit my lip. I looked down at my bowl of soup. I saw him finally lift his spoon to his mouth. He made noises like he was tasting it. I looked up at him.

"What is this?" He asked slowly.

"Beef." I answered too quickly. "I-I thought it was your favorite?"

He narrowed his eyes at me then looked back down at his soup, he was pushing everything around with his spoon. "If this is beef, then why isn't there any meat?"

I was getting more and more nervous. I swallowed hard before answering. "We were out."

He glared at me. "Idiot!" He threw his spoon at me but I dodged it and it hit the counter behind me.

"I'm not eating this without meat." He protested. "You can eat it. You're still too thin anyway. I'LL just have coffee." I immediately stood up and started making his coffee. "You didn't make some beforehand?"

"I-I'm sorry." I stammered. "It'll only be a minute."

"Idiot." He said. I poured the dark liquid into his cup and stirred in the cream. "Hurry up!" I was shaking. I sat the cup in front of him. He just stared at me. "Aren't you forgetting something?" I was confused. Then, I realized I left the spoon in his cup.

"Oh, I'm sorry." I grabbed it to put it into the sink. He smacked my back in the process. I watched him nervously take a sip. Then, he gave me a look. I felt like I was going to puke.

"Is this…dark roast?"

"…yes." It was barely audible. I bit my lip. There was a heavy silence as he stared at me. Then, he pounded his fists on the table. My eyes widened and I jumped.

"I can't let this one go." He stood up and grabbed the poke.

"No." I said quietly.

"Put your hands on the table." He demanded. He's never done that before. He always comes over to me and just starts beating me.

"No. Please." I begged close to tears.

"HANDS ON THE TABLE!"

I was too scared not to oblige. I put my hands on the table palm down, he raised the poke, I closed my eyes waiting for the pain. I screamed out immediately after it hit me. I'll never get used to that feeling. He hit me three times. I lay on the ground sobbing in pain. He was standing there shaking his head.

"You know what?" He started. "I've been thinking…" I looked up at him. "This isn't working out." He ran a hand through his hair like he was working on a stressful project at work. "I really wanted it to, Summer, but it's not. I guess I'm going to have to start looking for Fall again." He sighed and picked up his gun. My eyes widened. "I'll be humane, where do you want it?"

I immediately freaked out. He is not killing me today! I grabbed the pot off the stove and threw the hot soup on him. He screamed and rubbed his eyes. Then, I picked up the fire poke and started hitting him with it as hard and fast as I could. He was yelling in pain. He shot his gun once but missed me. I hit him in the leg and he went down. Then, I stabbed him in the stomach with the poke. I listened to his gruesome cries. Not one part of me felt bad. I couldn't get the poke out of him, but I wasn't done yet. I eyed the barbed wire on the counter and quickly unrolled some of it. I wrapped it tightly around my hands so I had a nice grip and then I proceeded to saw his head off with the wire. I didn't stop, I was in a rage. Blood sprayed everywhere and I listened to his gross sounds as he gasped for air. My hands were also bleeding from the wire. The sound of sinew ripping making me almost sick. I didn't stop until his head was on the floor.

I stood there panting. I was covered in blood. If anyone had watched this horrific scene, they would think that I was the crazy one. I looked down at his body. "It's over." I spit at him. "You're the idiot."

I gathered up all the food and supplies that this man had as fast as I could. I needed to get the hell out of here. Anywhere is better than here.

I reached for the doorknob, but froze. I haven't been outside in three weeks. I have been locked in this hell. You can do this. I coached myself. I nodded and took a deep breath. Slowly turning the knob, I opened the door and took a step out. I felt the air hit my face immediately, I could smell the trees. Birds few across the sky. The sky! I could see the sky! And it was beautiful. Before I knew it, I was sobbing. I broke down and fell to my knees crying. I cried for everything that happened here and how long I was here. How I was treated and how I thought I was going to die. It was all so overwhelming and it made me extremely emotional.

"I'm alive." I said out loud and cried. "I'm alive!"

I went back to that house I stayed at because I remembered that I left my fishing rod there. I get there and what do you know? My bag was still sitting right there in the front yard where I dropped it.

I went inside. I gathered up my supplies. The bag I took from that guy's house was practically filled so I took some supplies out of that one and put it into the other. I walked around the house making sure that I didn't leave anything else around. I found a teddy bear in one of the bedrooms that made me think of my sister. I grabbed it. I usually bring her back something whenever I go out on runs.

While I was in the bathroom, I looked at my reflection in the mirror. I was covered with blood. I was also covered in bruises. I should probably clean myself up a little before going home. Wouldn't want to scare anyone.

After changing my clothes and wiping myself off, I just stared at myself. I didn't look like me anymore. I still was me, I knew that, but I didn't look or even feel the same. I just don't feel like me. I thought sadly.

A little later, I looked at all the supplies I had. I got a good amount of stuff, mostly from that man's house. It's almost like it was supposed to happen. "It went the way it was going to. The way it was supposed to." I heard Tyreese's voice in my head. I quickly shook that thought. "No." I refuse to believe that this happened for that reason. I went through hell for that? No way. Not everything happens for a reason. Certainly not this. That's what I told myself…but I didn't believe me.

I stood outside the gates of Alexandria. I thought about staying at that house back there for another night, but I really wanted to get home.

A few people greeted me here and there as I made my way to my house. I gave them so much as a nod or just said a quick "hi."

I walked up the stairs to my house and opened the doors and stepped inside. "Michonne? That you?" I heard my dad's voice.

I didn't answer right away. "…it's me." My dad came from around the corner.

"Abby?" He said surprised. Then he looked really happy. "Abby, oh my gosh." He came over to me and hugged me tightly. I dropped everything in my arms. "I missed you so much." He said.

At first, I tensed up because for the passed few weeks, the only human connection I had was abuse. But then, I realized that this is my dad he would never hurt me. His touch was warm and welcoming and made me feel safe. I slowly wrapped my arms around him and hugged him back. Then, I put my face in his shoulder. I missed him so much, too.

He finally let go of me and looked at me. "You were gone for so long. I'm so glad you're back." He smiled. I tried to smile but my face just wouldn't do it.

"…uh, yeah…" I finally found my voice. "Sorry, some…stuff happened."

"That's okay. You're here now." He smiled. "You look different. Your hair's lighter?"

"Um…I-I didn't do that. Someone else did." I nodded. There was a brief pause. "Where's Michonne and Judith?"

"Michonne went to Hilltop to talk with Maggie about some rules and I just put Judith down for a nap."

"Oh." Was all I said. My dad gave me a strange look. I nervously tapped my fingers together. "I-I found a lot of supplies." I motioned to my two bags plus my fishing gear. "Weapons too."

"Good." My dad nodded. There was another pause between us but this one was longer and more awkward. I didn't know what to say, I just looked around the room. "Hey, Abby," my dad said and slightly moved me so I was looking at him, "you okay? What's 'a matter?" He clearly looked concerned.

I was nervous. Where do I start, dad? That I was kidnapped and beaten into submission? That I drove drunk and could have killed myself? That I found another community and tried to help them but ended up getting them all killed after forming emotional ties with some of them? Or that I watched a woman get raped and murdered and didn't do a thing to help her? I couldn't say any of this stuff, though. I just couldn't. But my dad was waiting for an answer. I looked down at my knotted fingers then back up at him. "Fuck this world."

"What did you just say?" My dad asked me.

"I said, fuck this world…and what it does to people."

My dad was giving me a strange look. He looked almost angry? I wanted to escape this awkward moment so I went upstairs to my room.

I showered immediately. I felt so gross. I cried pretty much the whole time while I was in there. I started to feel bad about what I said to my dad. He was all happy and excited to see me and I ruined it. "You idiot." I scolded myself then slapped myself in the face. My eyes widened at what I just did. Did I really just do that? I can't believe I just did that. That can't ever happen again. You are an idiot for what you did, though. I will have to apologize to my dad.

I took a nap after that, my dad woke me up for dinner. He didn't have to do that. I could have made dinner. I slowly made my way downstairs. "Abby!" Judy ran to me.

"Hey, kid." I yawned and picked her up. I gave her a quick hug then set her back on the floor. "We got any wine or anything?" I asked my dad.

"I made this for you." She handed me a folded piece of paper. "It's a welcome home card!" She grinned from ear to ear.

"Aw that's nice. Thanks." I set it aside without opening it. I didn't miss the look my dad gave me. "You didn't have to do this, you know? I could have made dinner."

"Well, you seemed liked you needed some rest. Feeling any better?"

"Not really but ya know?" I took a big gulp of water. My dad eyed me. He can tell there's something up with me. I just remembered that I wanted to apologize. I glanced at Judith, she was lost in her own world. "Oh, hey, dad? I'm sorry about earlier. What I said. I just…" I closed my eyes and looked down. "Bad…bad stuff happened."

"It's alright." My dad reassured me. "I just want you to be okay."

"I know." I nodded. "I am." I sighed. "I-I will be."

"You want to talk about it?"

"No." I answered too quickly. I calmed down. "I-I can't. I'm not ready."

He nodded. "I understand."

There was a brief pause. I ate some of my food. "So, how's the bridge coming along?"

"Pretty good." My dad nodded. "Almost done. I'm going back tomorrow. I took a break today to check on Judith."

"That's good. I'll come with you." I saw Judith look up at me when I said that.

"Abby, no. You don't have to. Just rest. You just got back."

"No, dad." I snapped. "I don't want to stay here and—" I glanced at my sister. She looked sad. I can't say that in front of her. "I just…I want to help. I can help you."

"Well, okay. But you really don't have to."

"I want to." I put the last of my dinner into my mouth. "I'll clean up." I said with my mouth still full.

"No, I can do it." My dad said. He stood up and came over to me at the sink.

"Dad, I can help. I'm not like…broken."

He grabbed the plate I had in my hands but I didn't let go. "I know but you just got back and you should rest up the rest of the day."

"I said, it's fine." I pulled the plate and it slipped out of our hands and fell to the floor. It broke in a million pieces. My eyes widened. I'm an idiot.

"I'll get a broom." My dad said coming closer to me. I gasped and cringed like he was going to hit. My eyes were wide. I backed up against the counter. "Hey, hey." My dad said softly. "It's okay." He put his hand on my face and looked at me in the eyes. "It's okay."

I slowed my breathing down and calmed down. I felt embarrassed and got tears in my eyes. "I-I'm sorry. I'm sorry." I cried. I moved aside and put my hands on the counter and looked down.

"Abby, it's okay." He put his hand on my back, I tensed up again. "It's alright." My dad gently rubbed my back. I finally calmed down. I was embarrassed, though, so I tried to play it cool.

"I'm fine. I'm good." I pushed my hair out of my face.

My dad nodded. "Just let me take care of this."

I sighed. "Yeah, okay."

Then, my dad sighed. "I gotta take Negan his damn dinner."

I perked up a little inside. I almost forgot about him. I hadn't seen him yet. "I'll do it."

"You sure you want to?"

"Yeah, it's no problem at all." I quickly put some food onto a plate and then took his tray out to him.

I opened the door into the jail. Negan was sitting there in the corner, he didn't notice me yet. I saw a tray of food on the floor that wasn't touched. It was old. Why didn't eat that? "Hey, it's me." I said. He looked up. "I'm back."

He didn't say anything, just started to laugh. He slowly got up and made his way closer to me. "Damn…you were gone for so long, I thought for sure you found your hubby and you two took off."

"Pfff. No. I would never do that." I sat his tray on the ground so he could pull it under the door. "I brought your dinner. I see you didn't eat your dinner from last night. Why?"

"Not in the mood to eat."

"Well, you should. If you don't eat it, it gets wasted." I stopped. Look at me sounding like that guy. "Well, I'll let you eat. I just wanted to let you know that I was back…and in one piece." I tried to smile, but again, I couldn't. I grabbed his tray from before. I can dump this food outside. I started to leave but turned back around. "Oh and…you were right about what you said about finding people. That is what we should be afraid of."

That got his attention. "What happened to you?"

I shook my head. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Did someone do something to you?" Negan pressed himself against the cell door. He actually sounded concerned. Part of me wanted to tell him, but I don't think I can talk about everything yet.

I shook my head again. "Eat your food, Negan." I walked out of the jail.

"What happened to you?" I heard him yell. I sighed loudly. Then, I headed back to the house to put the tray back.

Judith followed me out onto the porch. "Where goin'?"

"To throw this food out."

"Why?"

I rolled my eyes. "Because it's old."

"I come?"

"Sure, kid. As long as you stay inside the walls." I sighed clearly annoyed. She happily skipped along with me. She's not like this with anyone but me, especially not this talkative. I really don't know why I was annoyed, though. She never annoyed me before. I guess maybe it was her naiveness. Then again, she is only three. I just didn't feel like dealing with it.

"Did you get me something?" She asked sweetly.

I remembered about the teddy bear I found. "Yeah, I did actually. I forgot to give it to you."

"Yay!" She jumped. "Can you read to me tonight?"

"I don't know, kid." We reached the gate. "Stay here." I walked outside and scraped the food off the plate onto the ground. The only thing that's going to eat that is ants. I thought while staring at it. I looked back and Judith was gone. Panic set in immediately. "Judith? Judith, where are you?" I turned the corner and found her behind one of the cars, she was watching a butterfly. "Judith!" I yelled making her jump. "Get over here!" I yanked her by her arm. "I told you to stay inside. Don't you ever come out here again, you hear me? Not ever!" She was giving me a sad and maybe a little scared look. I felt bad and sighed. I spoke softer. "Look, there's bad stuff…out here. I just don't want you to get hurt." I hugged her. "Come on." I grabbed her hand and we walked back to the house.

I gave Judith her teddy bear once we got back home. She was running all over the house playing with it, she was being very loud. Any other time, I would find it cute but right now I had an awful headache.

I sat on the couch with my dad, he was laughing occasionally at Judith. "What time should I be up tomorrow?" I asked my dad.

"I wanna get there for six."

"Okay. I'll set my alarm."

"You sure you still don't want to stay home with Judith to—

"Yes! I'm sure." I snapped. My dad gave me a look. "Sorry. I-I just wanna help." My sister was being very loud.

"You do help. A lot."

"Yeah, well…one can always do more." I leaned back. My sister climbed up on the couch and started jumping and yelling things and talking fast. "Can you please not do that, Judy? I have a headache." I rubbed my temples. She didn't listen to me, though. She continued to jump and shout. I couldn't take it anymore. I was about to lose it. "Shut up, Judith!" I yelled. Everything stopped for a minute. Judith gave me a scared look then ran upstairs. I immediately regretted yelling at her. My dad was giving me a disbelieving look. "I'm sorry." I looked down at my hands wide-eyed. "I didn't…I didn't mean to. I lost my temper. I'm sorry."

"Tell her that." My dad said. I hope he's not mad at me. I stared at the floor. Just then, I noticed the fire poke sitting against the wall by the fireplace. I started breathing heavily and shaking. "Abby, maybe you should just get some sleep?"

I nodded. "Yeah, yeah." I stood up.

"Everything will be okay." My dad told me. I nodded and then headed up to my room.

I stared at myself in the mirror while breathing heavily. I slapped myself in the face, got scared of my dad and yelled at my baby sister. What's wrong with me?

Hey everyone! Hope you liked the chapter! I swear I wrote this before the episode where Alpha cuts the woman's head off with the wire! That was my idea first lol Please review! :)