Life goes on

by dreamandlive

Michael and Claudia have reached a point of no return. The only solution seems to be separation. Unless life has the good idea to change all that.

6. Chapter 6 - Reunion

At the bottom of the stairs, the door opened on Michael. He was followed by his driver who came to drop the things and suitcases. Michael put one on the floor when he saw Claudia. The latter was shocked. She was so surprised to see him here and so happy. She was speechless, her eyes wet, she could not speak. She stepped towards him and fell into his arms. She felt great happiness, Michael a great relief.

M: Claudia, honey.

Michael was moved. He had only been waiting for her since the announcement of the hospitalization of his wife. Come in, take care of her and get better. A few tears ran from Claudia's eyes. Michael knew that she had become very sensitive since that bad time she had to live without him. He hoped that with his return, everything will be better. Michael turned his face to the driver who was waiting for any orders.

M: You can go there. Thank you.

The driver left, closing the door. Michael turned his attention to Claudia. The latter was hugging him, she was stuck to him, his head buried in his neck.

C: What good is it to see you go home?
M: Its going to go, I'm here now.
C: I missed you so much Michael.
M: I know. You also missed me terribly, and I was so worried.

Claudia knew that Michael had not been able to phone him, talk to him for a month. She knew it must have been heartbreaking for him to have news only from Denise. All that reinforced that feeling of happiness to meet again. Michael put a hand on his wife's head and held it against him. He kissed her on the cheek.

M: I'm so relieved to see you're better.

He pulled away from her and put his hands on Claudia's cheeks.

M: Now I'm going to take care of you, I'll take care of you and everything will work out.

Claudia nodded. Michael kissed him with a lot of love and tenderness.

M: I love you.
C: Me too.

They hugged each other for long minutes. When they broke off, they looked into each other's eyes and smiled at each other. Michael put a lock of his wife's hair behind her ear. He kissed her affectionately on the forehead. It was time to put away Michael's luggage. So they went upstairs. Claudia helped him undo all that.

C: Have you had a good trip?
M: Yes everything went very well. I could not wait to get in if you knew.

Claudia turned her face to him. She had a look full of sweetness and tenderness.

M: I was very scared Claudia, I was so scared.

The latter came to him.

C: I know. I know everything has been difficult for you by being far away. Especially not to be able to talk to me, to hear me for so much time. I knew it was for my good. But ...

Tears invaded Claudia's eyes.

C: I would have wanted you so much. I only needed you and it was impossible for me to call you.

Michael took her in his arms. To see Claudia in that state was splitting her heart. She was certainly a little better but he still had some way to go and he would be with her now.

C: Everything has been so hard Michael.
M: I know, but everything is over now.

Claudia sighed.

C: Hold me strong.

Michael tightened his grip. Claudia felt safe and serene in Michael's arms.

C: That's all I'll need to get out of this gear, just you, your love and your love.
M: So do not worry, I'm here.

Michael saw the blanket that was on the bed. He understood that before his arrival, Claudia had to rest.

M: Did you rest when I arrived?
C: Yes, but do not worry, it's okay.
M: You still look tired Claudia.
C: Now that you're here I'll sleep better at night, everything will be fine.
M: Do you know what we're going to do? Since I came back from Brussels yesterday for my last mission day in Washington, and I got up very early this morning to come back home quickly, I'm pretty tired myself. I propose to lie down with you and that we both rest together. What do you think about it ?

Claudia pulled away from him, she smiled at him.

C: That's a very good idea.

They kissed tenderly. Michael changed and put on more comfortable clothes to stay at home. He joined Claudia who was already lying down. He then took her against him and put a hand on his hair, as if he wanted to protect her from everything. They fell asleep then against each other. They had been sleeping for almost an hour when they knocked on the door. Michael was awake but he found that Claudia was still sleeping. He managed to get out of the blanket without waking her up. He went down and went to open.

D: Michael ?!
M: Hi Denise.
D: Oh, but it's great that you've already returned.
M: Come in, please.

They joined the salon.

M: Claudia is resting again.
D: She must have been so happy to see you coming.
M: You can not imagine the relief I felt when I arrived.
D: Your return was the best thing that could happen to her.
M: Of course I only resume work Monday so the next four days will be dedicated to Claudia. Besides, how to help him to get better?
D: You just said it yourself, take care of her. All she feels is increased tenfold, be it happiness, the love she has for you, but also the anger, the sadness. You have to manage this so that it does not go into excess. And something else, she's still restless at night. Much less than before but she has periods of anxiety again. Everything will return to order in a while. So wake up if it happens and reassure there. She really needs you Michael.
M: Restless at night?
D: We do not know exactly what's going on, maybe she'll talk to you about it, but she still has one or two awakenings at night, which makes her still tired during the day. Once this problem is fixed, it will resume a correct rhythm, its emotions will be under control again, it will no longer need drugs and ... finally we will finally find the Claudia we know.
M: Okay. I'll take care of her Denise, I'll give her all the attention she needs and I promise you that she'll be much better before I go back to work.
D: Do not be too impatient, this kind of thing needs time. You see, it's been three months now that Claudia has made her burnout and there are still little things to see. Another thing, the doctor comes every Friday at the end of the morning, so he will be there Friday, you will be able to take stock with him.
M: Very good.

Claudia appeared at that time.

D: Hey my beautiful.
C: Hello Denise.

They kissed each other. Claudia settled near Michael.

D: How are you today?
C: Michael is back, that's all that matters. I was just waiting for that.
D: I know. Finally the fact that you were absent Michael was positive. Because when the doctor indicated that she could start seeing people again, I'm the first person she could see again, and then Jackie. Emmalin did not arrive until two weeks later, and Claudia was already better. His friends on the base followed one another, Roland came too, Roxy and Pamela also afterwards. This allowed him to gradually find each other. Afterwards, she made the decision whether people could come to see her or not, which also helped morale. She has recovered better and better. Emmalin was on vacation for two weeks so she could come take care of her. She has therefore regained her footing quietly. Your return was the last step, we did not know how she would react.
M: Why that?
D: Because Claudia's worries have been a source of contention between you and those bad memories that could have made her relapse.
C: We had solved this problem before Michael left, so there was no risk.
D: Maybe it was enough of a small grain of sand, and you knew it, we had talked about it. And luckily, the happiness of finding you was stronger than that.
M: Last month was hard for everyone Denise. I listened to your advice and those of the doctors but not being able to call her, and not being able to see her on Skype, was really hard.
D: For Claudia also this period was difficult since she could neither see nor call anyone. I could not see her herself, she was a colleague who took care of her. We had to be patient and we did well, the proof.
M: But now I'm going to take care of her. She will be the center of my attention.
D: I do not doubt it. Claudia how was the night? Since you have almost no medicine, I hope you get to sleep properly.
C: I still have this scary awakening in the middle of the night, but otherwise it's okay.
D: Okay. It's one of the little things that means you have to keep getting stronger, your body still has reactions from before.
C: I know.
D: I'll leave you, I just wanted to see how Claudia was today. If you need, do not hesitate.
M: Thank you Denise and especially thank you for being so busy Claudia during my absence. It is thanks to you too if she is much better.
C: Michael is right, I do not know what I will have done without you.
D: I only helped my best friend and being there for each other is one of our priorities. So I was happy to be able to do it.
C: Thank you.

Denise left, leaving Michael and Claudia alone.

M: Do you still need to sleep?
C: No, that'll be fine. There are still your bags to put away and laundry to do.
M: Are you sure?
C: Michael, I know you were worried, very worried. But I learned to listen to myself and listen to the signs that my body is sending me now. Your return has been a breath of fresh air for me, I'm so glad you came back. So yes I'm sure, and I promise you it's okay.
M: Okay.

Claudia kissed him quickly and went back upstairs. Michael went to his desk to peel the mails that he had not had time to read. During the day, Michael could see that Claudia was doing much better and had normal days. He was reassured. The day was soon over and after their dinner, Michael and Claudia found themselves in their room. After going to bed, Claudia immediately went into Michael's arms. She had hoped for that for many weeks. She raised her head and kissed Michael sharply. The latter realized that Claudia was overwhelmed by her emotions, that she did not control much. He did not want this kind of reunion with her. He pushed her slightly away from her face and stared at her with great tenderness.

M: Honey, wait ...

Michael kissed her with a lot of tenderness, then pulled away from her again.

M: You know I want it as much as you do, but not now, not like that. You know how important these moments are to both of us, but you need to find yourself before.

Claudia bit her lip so as not to cry but tears rolled down her cheeks anyway. She knew it, Michael was right.

C: But I love you.
M: Yes, and me too. Come here.

Michael took Claudia against him. He stroked her back, her hair. He kept telling him that he loved her more than anything. Then he turned off the light and they fell asleep for the first time in three months. In the middle of the night, her nightmare awoke her brutally. Michael jumped too. He turned to her, he had never seen her with so much pain in his eyes. Claudia thought she was alone and could not remember that Michael had come home. She needed to breathe and without paying attention to him, she went down, opened the front door and went out on the steps despite the freezing temperatures of January. Michael was worried, he joined her with a blanket that he placed on his shoulders, he made her return. Claudia saw him, she began to cry. Michael took her against him and they went back to their room.

M: Claudia, what's going on?

The latter did not answer. She reacts when Michael has returned home. But she did not want to talk to him about it. She knew it had to do with Michael's absence. But she did not understand why with her return, all that was still tormenting her at night. They went back to bed. Michael took Claudia in his arms again, he hugged her to tell him he was there. The rest of the night passed without a hitch. Michael did not get back to the subject of this nocturnal awakening, but he dreaded the following night. Contrary to what had happened the day before, Claudia woke up but without screaming, just out of breath. Claudia went back to bed turning to her side. She found her normal breathing gradually. Michael had woken up too. He had only half slept since his return. He moved closer to her and leaned over her. He saw that she had cried. He kissed her on the temple. Claudia was surprised to find that Michael had woken up too, but she did not move. She needed that tenderness. He ran a hand under Claudia's pajamas and stroked his back. He whispered a few words to her.

M: Honey, it's okay, I'm here now.

Claudia closed her eyes. Her breathing returned to normal and she went back to sleep. Michael watched over her for nearly two hours before surrendering to the fatigue that held him and he went back to sleep. When the sun rose, Claudia felt the warmth of the sun's rays on her face. She appreciated that moment before opening her eyes. She turned to Michael, who was also starting to wake up. She then lolled against him and went back to sleep. Michael woke in turn but kept Claudia against him and watched her sleep for a long time. She seemed so peaceful, the opposite of what her face expressed when she woke up at night. If only she would agree to talk to him about what terrorized her so much. Claudia finally woke up. They took advantage of this moment while remaining in the arms of one another.
In the late morning, the doctor came to visit Claudia. He was delighted to finally meet Michael and found that his return had a lot of benefits for his patient. He decided to stop any treatment. For him, Michael had to help him get better and that he would be the key to Claudia's healing. Michael walked the doctor to the door.

M: Doctor, are you sure that stopping all her medications is a good idea?
Me: I think there may be a few days when your wife will have mood swings, she will cry for little, get upset for little. But she will need to exteriorize certain things to find an emotional stability. You're back, so you're going to be his pillar.
M: I trust you, but I resume my work on Monday.
Me: This new rhythm will help him find his own. But if you have a doubt, a problem, you can call me without problem.
M: All right, thank you Doctor.

The doctor left, leaving Michael to his doubts.
In the early afternoon, Michael and Claudia went hand in hand, strolling through the base. They arrived at the pond which was beautiful with the reflection of the sun's rays. They crossed the bridge and went to settle on a bench in the shade, away from the road and where nobody could come to disturb them. Once settled in, Claudia rested her head on Michael's shoulder. The latter took his chin and lifted his face to come lay his lips against his wife.

M: I love you so much honey.
C: Oh me too.
M: Does ... Claudia, can I ask you something?
C: Of course, honey.
M: You must promise to answer me.
C: It's promised.
M: What happens at night? Why do you have so much terror in your eyes?
C: Michael, I can not tell you about it, I ...
M: Claudia, we always agreed. We never judged ourselves. I am so worried.
C: I'm sorry ... but I ...

Claudia caught her breath, seeing her pictures before her eyes was difficult for her.

M: Claudia, you have to know that I have trouble knowing what could help you. I need you to tell me, that you trust me. I do not know what wakes you up but I know that I feel the pain that you have in your eyes, it hurts so much to see you like that.

Claudia realized that she could not let Michael be so worried. Claudia said to him all at once, without stopping, staring into space.

C: It happened the first time when I came home after my hospitalization. This is the first time I'm sleeping at home. And coming back here reminded me how much I missed you. I fell asleep. The next morning we rang the bell. I went to open. Two men in official clothes were there. They asked me if I was Mrs. Holden, I said yes. They asked me if I was your wife, I said yes. They told me that NATO had been the target of a violent attack, and that you had died there. I stopped breathing. I hung on the door and dropped to the floor. I felt an immense pain. The departure of Amanda hurt me so much that I know this pain by heart. But it was awful, I felt that my heart was writhing in all directions, it was breaking little by little. I could not see anything, I could not hear anything. I screamed your name. I found myself sitting in my bed the next night, Emmalin was next to me, she asked me what was going on. We had just heard that you were dead and she had the impression of going perfectly well. I asked him what day we were.

She moved her eyes and looked into Michael's.

C: Then I realized that I had just had a nightmare, which I have been doing every night since that day.

Michael took her in his arms, tears rolled down her cheeks.

C: Each time, this pain pierces my heart. It hurts so much.
M: I know, because I felt it myself when you almost left during the operation for your transplant. I felt it just a few seconds when the doctor had explained to me, but this feeling was terrible.

They pressed against each other. They broke off and kissed with great love and gentleness. Michael kissed him on the forehead. Claudia rested her head on Michael's shoulder and resumed her breath little by little. The sun had turned slightly and the rays passed through the branches of the trees. Claudia felt a little warm, she fell asleep. Michael let her sleep next to him. He watched people pass by, and remembered his life with Claudia. He understood something then, which Claudia would understand much later. He thought back to his decision to leave the army. Maybe all that had changed his feelings. Claudia woke up.

M: How are you?
C: Better yes. We are both here.
M: Yes, we should do this more often. We should go home now.
C: No, I want to stay a little longer.
M: Okay how you want.

They remained discussing everything and nothing, Michael told him about his mission in Brussels, Claudia told him about Emmalin. They found that common happiness to spend time together.
That afternoon, Denise and Jackie decided to go for a jog. They arrived near the pond where they met Maggie, Latasha and Holly with another female soldier they did not know.

D: Hi girls.
L: Denise, Jackie, how are you?
J: Good. We enjoy the winter sun. And you?
Ma: We have a new neighbor, so we wanted him to visit the base. Introducing Ms. Soler, Maureen Soler.
D: Nice to meet you I assume we'll see you at the monthly newcomer party?
Mau: Yes, it's planned.
J: You are the wife of Major Soler, he must be under the orders of Franck.
D: Okay. Franck Sherwood is my husband.
Mau: Oh very good. In any case you have a really beautiful base. I heard only good. We must believe that the general is doing a magnificent job here.
J: Oh it's not my husband who's holding the base, she's under General Holden's reindeer.

Maureen was surprised to hear that name. But she does not take it into account on the neck. Everyone walks away when Holly lives far away Michael and Claudia.

H: Speaking of the general, it seems to me that he is there no?
D: Right. I see he's in good company.
J: How is she doing?
D: Better and better. Anyway, Michael has to take care of her every second.
Mau: The general and his wife walks in the base?
L: Yes, and you know they are really a model for a lot of people here.
Mau: They look so close together.
D: And they are, believe me. In almost twenty years I know them they have never changed their habits despite the ranks of Michael. Even in public they remain as much in love as in the first day.
Mau: I find it so good that a general is both human and normal.

Everyone laughed. Nobody dared to bother Michael and Claudia and everyone left the park. The girls separated each on their own to return home. Michael and Claudia returned at the end of the afternoon. When he returned, the phone rang. It was Emmalin. They stayed for a long time on the phone with her. When Michael and Claudia went up to sleep, Claudia started the conversation.

C: Honey, that's not how our life was going to be hum?
M: How? What do you mean ?

C: We should have had a life similar to the one we had during our first years of life together. Despite the deployments, transfers, we were happy.
M: Honey, we are happy too now.
C: Everything was hard on us. We were ripped off our daughter, we had very difficult moments with Emmalin, we discovered my diabetes, you went on a mission and everything went badly, I had my kidney problem, the worries with my job , all those weeks of shouting, your coma, my burnout ...
M: Claudia, it's true that we had to face many things and not least for some, the proof is today. But by our ...
C: Michael, tell me the truth, do you regret your life with me?

Michael was speechless about his wife's question.

M: Regret my life with you?
C: I would understand that you're tired of experiencing all these hardships and ...
M: Claudia Joy Holden ...

Claudia stopped talking, she found Michael's eyes. He had only too rarely used his full name to challenge him.

M: Never, do you hear me? I would never regret my life at your side. I fell madly in love with you as soon as I saw you for the first time and I have always loved you ever since. You are the most important person in my eyes, you are indispensable to me. And what I'm going to tell you may be a bit of a pain to you but ... when Amanda left, the first thing I thought about was saying yes Amanda was gone but I had my wife and that's all that mattered.

Claudia looked at him with incomprehension.

M: Our love is stronger than any trial, and we were able to overcome everything because we love each other more than anything. And that is why I will never regret my life with you honey, because we are still as much in love with each other as on the first day. Claudia, you are my world, you are everything for me, without you I will be nothing. I am the happiest of men to be with you every day of my life, even on mission.
C: I love you Michael.

Michael took her in his arms.

M: Me too Claudia.

They fell asleep peacefully. That night, Claudia did not wake up. And when, at dawn, the light of day made her open her eyes, she felt much better.
On Saturday afternoon, Claudia was invited with Denise to drink tea at Jackie's.

J: I'm glad we can spend some time all three.
D: Yes me too.
C: The idea of finally enjoying this kind of thing also pleases me. I finally feel like I can get my head out of the water.
J: Claudia we are really happy that everything is better for you.
C: Thank you. And you, what's up?
D: We finish organizing the Friday night welcome party.
C: Ah, the famous welcome party ... the evening of every first Friday of the month.
J: I see you know what we're talking about.
C: Are you laughing? I organized hundreds of them. I will come help you to install ...
D: Oh great, like the good old days.
C: I think that I especially need to gradually resume my life in hand.
J: By the way we saw you yesterday at the park.
C: Yes we went out with Michael for a ride. We were really good both. You just know how to enjoy, to hang time. But I did not see you!
J: We did not want to disturb you.
D: Yes we left with Latasha, Maggie and Holly.
J: Without forgetting our new military woman from the base.
C: Who is it?
D: Some Maureen Soler, she just arrived.

Claudia frowned. This name vaguely told him something but impossible to remember what exactly. The discussion drifted quickly over Molly and Jackie's children. When Claudia returned home, she rummaged through the cardboard boxes in one of the upstairs friendly rooms. She suddenly fell on a picture, she was speechless. Michael entered the room at that time.

M: Honey, how are you?

Claudia got up and sat on the bed next to it.

C: I can not believe it!
M: Of what?
C: Do you remember that picture?

Michael sat next to her and took the picture. We saw Claudia, Amanda in her arms, next to a young woman.

M: Was it at Fort Irwin no?
C: Exactly.

Michael put his finger on Amanda who was just two years old in the picture.

M: She was so small.
C: I know ...
M: Who's next to you?
C: This is my best friend at the time. She was new to the base and I felt like I saw myself when I arrived on my very first base. I had taken her under my wing and we had become really close, almost like sisters.
M: She was there when Emmalin was born?
C: Yes, without it I do not know what could have happened.
M: I remember now, her name was Maureen.
C: Hum that's right. Imagine she's probably in Fort Marshall.

Michael turned quickly to Claudia.

M: What? But it's impossible ! After all this time ?
C: Look, I was at Jackie earlier and they told me that among the newcomers, they had already met Maureen Soler. It can only be Michael.
M: More than twenty years later? It would be an extraordinary coincidence. Claudia I do not want to take away your enthusiasm, but you know this last name is pretty well received.
C: Michael certainly, but her name is Maureen, I do not see how it would be possible to have several people of the same name and the same name, especially in the army. You know another Claudia Joy Holden?
M: No, the one and only is the woman I love the most in the world.
C: Honey ...

Michael kissed her lovingly.

M: But you may be right, there are chances for herself. Would not it be crazy?
C: Completely.

Claudia got up to take the cardboard box where she had found the picture and got out of it. She was convinced that this woman was the same woman who had just arrived at the base. She would have the heart on the following Friday during the welcome party.
The next day, Sunday, Claudia got up with some trepidation. Michael was back to work the next day. How was she going to handle that? Michael noticed at lunch, Claudia was silent.

M: Something wrong?
C: Hmm ... I was thinking of tomorrow.
M: Claudia, what's going on?
C: You resume work tomorrow.
M: That's right.
C: I wish you stayed at home a little longer.

Michael put a hand on Claudia's.

M: Hey it's okay. I will be on the base. You can call me and if it really does not work I'll come home soon.
C: Michael, you can not leave your office like this ...
M: Franck knows, and if you really need I go to see you okay?
C: Ok.

Michael stroked his hand with one thumb, then they resumed their lunch. That day Claudia was on edge. Michael watched him all day and ended up apprehending the next day's recovery. That evening, Claudia lay down next to Michael and laid her head on his chest. She wondered how she could have been so sensitive and anxious for anything. For her, all she had experienced in recent years was problematic. But by what? She was going to find out in a short time.
On Monday morning, Michael got up at dawn. Claudia was still sleeping and he was careful not to wake her up. He went running, to get back in shape. On his way back he took a quick shower in the bathroom next to Emmalin's room for not waking Claudia. As he was having coffee while reading the newspaper in the kitchen, he saw Claudia arrive.

M: Honey, go back to sleep, you have to rest.
C: I did not want you to leave without wishing you a good day.
M: I'll be hugging you before you go, you know.

Claudia smiled at him. They kissed tenderly.

C: Do you have everything you need?
M: Yes everything is fine. Go back to bed to rest a little. I'm leaving in five minutes.
C: Ok. Have a nice day, sweatheart.
M: You too.

Claudia kissed him with a lot of love.

C: I love you.
M: Me too. See you tonight.
C: Okay.

Claudia went back to bed and Michael went to work. Claudia slept another hour. When she got up, she decided to go to the FRG meeting with Denise and Jackie. The latter were delighted to see her return. In the afternoon she rested and then prepared the evening dinner. Michael returned shortly before 7pm. Claudia heard the door close.

C: Michael ?
M: Yes.
C: I'm in the kitchen.

Michael put his bag on the couch in his office and went into the kitchen.

C: Did you have a good day?

They took each other in their arms.

M: I had trouble getting back into the bath. But everything went well.

He kissed Claudia tenderly.

Place yourself ?
C: Yes, we can say that the day went well. I went to the FRG this morning, and I rested a little this afternoon before preparing dinner.
M: It's perfect. We'll be able to spend the evening both of us quietly.
C: That's an idea I like.

They smiled at each other. After going to dinner, Michael had a long report to sign, so he went to his desk. Claudia went up and did some storage. She came across one of the holiday photo albums when the girls were young. Amanda before 4 years and Emmalin just 2. She then flipped through. When Michael arrived, he saw pictures lying on the bed, and Claudia was watching an album. He sat down beside him to see what it was. He understood. He felt a lot of nostalgia. But not to increase that of Claudia, he launched the conversation in the tone of the joke.

M: Nice pictures, but then I took one of those old shots!

Claudia smiled.

M: By cons, no matter the date of the photos, between yesterday and today you are still so beautiful, honey.
C: Hmm ... do not exaggerate anyway. Time goes by for everyone.
M: In my eyes you are.

Claudia turned her face to him.

C: Thank you.

She kissed him furtively.

C: Emmalin was so small on these pictures. She still had her baby face. She was so cute.
M: Emmalin is a pretty young woman now. But she kept a little mischief. Basically she has not changed much.
C: That's right.

Claudia rested the photos and took others. On each she ran a finger across Amanda's face. Michael saw that the emotion was palpable in the room. It had been a long time since they had talked about Amanda together again until they had been to the cemetery. He put a hand on Claudia's back and caressed him slowly. Claudia, who was in her thoughts, was out of this tender gesture.

C: I miss her so much.
M: I know. I miss her too.

Claudia let the tears flow down her cheeks.

C: It's so difficult.

Michael took her in his arms against him.

M: I have a lot of trouble too. Today is a day without, it will probably be better tomorrow.
C: Michael, I think a lot about her and at the moment I can not overcome my sadness and pain.
M: That kind of thing is not controlled. But I believe that since the day she left us, neither of us can overcome the pain. Sadness yes, but not pain.

Claudia listened but did not really pay attention to Michael's words.

C: It's hard to tell yourself that what you feel will stay until the end of your life.
M: I know. But we love each other and you know that's what helps us every day.
C: Michael, I do not know how I'll do without you.
M: And me without you. So we will continue to be there for each other.

Michael tightened his embrace. He kissed Claudia on the hair. This continued need for attention from Claudia and his need to give him every day asked him a question. Never had they needed each other so much, despite the different trials they had had to overcome. Michael understood that Amanda's disappearance was the starting point for everything. With Claudia, they thought they overcame that, managed to manage their pain, their sadness. All that was wrong. They had buried their feelings so as not to hurt the other, not to make him sad. Of course there had been repercussions. And tonight's discussion had proved it. They ended up storing the photos and fell asleep quickly after going to bed.
The next day, Claudia was still sleeping when Michael left to work. He went back to their room. He kissed her on the hair so as not to wake her up and left. That day, Claudia took another step in her recovery. She decided to go see Grant at the office. She had not told Michael about it. She wanted to do it herself. Arriving at the office, his heart accelerated. She felt a lot of stress. Suzanne the secretary was surprised to see her.

S: Mrs. Holden, hello!
C: Hello Suzanne. Is Master Chandler here?
S: Yes he is in his office.
C: All right, thank you.

Claudia walked down the hallway to the various offices of the cabinet. She was tempted to leave but knocked on Grant's door.

G: Suzanne, I asked not to be ...

Seeing Claudia, Chandler was completely lost.

G: Claudia ?! What are you doing here ?
C: I needed to come back.
G: But come in, come and sit down.

Claudia closed the door and sat down in front of Grant.

G: How are you?
C: We'll say better. Michael went back to work yesterday, the day without him it's difficult. But considering what I went through two months ago, we can say that I'm better.
G: I'm glad to hear it. You scared me Claudia.
C: And I'm sorry. I should have understood what you wanted to tell me. I heard but I did not want to listen.
G: Claudia, when I saw you arrive in the morning with files of loans for the hearings, made in the space of three days I understood that you had night all night many times. I knew that it will end badly. And I was even more scared when I saw that you did not understand my warnings.
C: I know. But we had some pretty complicated things with Michael, his return from the mission was really difficult. And when he told me he was leaving for three months, I wanted to make the most of the complicated files to be available for him when he returned.
G: I totally understand Claudia. But you have to think of yourself first. When are you coming back ?
C: I do not know Grant. Not for the moment. I am not ready yet.
G: Then take your time! But the day you come back you will have to be able to work while continuing to manage your obligations to the army. Take back half-time is the best.
C: I would think about it okay? I will let you work.
G: Give us news.
C: I'll make sure. See you soon Grant.
G: Bye Claudia.

That evening, Claudia finally explained to Michael that she went back to the office. The latter read a little before sleeping. Claudia then spoke.

C: Honey, I went to see Grant today.

Michael put down his book and his glasses, then he looked at Claudia.

M: Did you go back to the office?

He had asked her very gently.

C: Hmm, I had this need to go back.
M: Why did not you tell me about it?
C: I wanted to do it alone.
M: I understand honey. So what ?
C: I was terribly anxious, but I did not turn around. I had to talk with Grant.
M: How was it all then?
C: I explained to him that I should have listened to him. Grant had seen for a long time that the situation was getting worse, I did not want to understand it. Then he asked me when I planned to resume ...

Michael looked at her questioningly. He was afraid of the answer.

C: Honey, I'm not ready yet.

Michael was relieved. Claudia was well aware that what had happened was quite serious and that everything could have been worse.

M: And I can only understand. You have experienced something complicated, you have to become completely yourself and be sure you can manage again correctly before returning to work.
C: Thank you. Grant suggested that I only go back part-time the day I come back.
M: Claudia, I think he's right. You have a lot to do at work, here on the base, and with your obligations to me and the army. By working only part-time, you could better manage your schedule and not have any worries afterwards.
C: Do you think?
M: I'm sure, sweatheart. I understood a lot of things. But you are not in a position to understand them for the moment. But when the time comes, you will understand them. In the meantime, I love you too much to let you make the same mistakes again. I do not want this kind of problem to happen anymore.
C: I know.
M: So take the time you need to finish giving yourself back, make the right decisions for the future to allow you to lead a life without stress, without anxiety.
C: But I'm going to need you Michael.
M: That's why I tell you that what Grant told you is the answer. But for the moment I do not want you to think anymore, I just want you to recover and everything to be like before.

Claudia stared at Michael and looked into him.

C: I care so much about you if you knew.

Claudia had never told him that way. That she loved him yes, that she needed him yes, that she did not know what she would do without him yes, but never that she was so close to him. And even if he knew it.

C: I do not want to lose you.
M: Sweatheart...

Michael kissed him with a lot of love. He pulled away from her while remaining forehead to forehead. He spoke to her whispering.

M: I want you more than anything. And you will never lose me, I will always be there.

They then took each other in their arms and hugged each other. Although Michael knew that Claudia was reacting all of a sudden to his emotions that were increased as a result of his condition, he took the opportunity to give him all that attention that Claudia expected. He had been so absent in the last 25 years that he felt like he was making up for lost time. His wife was everything to him, he loved her immeasurably. They eventually fell asleep, both entwined.
The week ended pretty well for Claudia who managed to better manage her emotions. She was now sleeping well at night, and no longer needed to rest in the afternoon. She could go help Denise and Jackie for the FRG. She did not think about Grant anymore, and focused on her help that she could bring to the base and enjoyed the presence of Michael every night, since he always arrived home early.
Friday night was the welcome party for the new families. The FRG then organized a meal with the FRG members to better integrate the families at the base. Senior officers never attended this kind of party. Michael had a planned dinner with generals coming to Fort Marshall for an important meeting the next day. Claudia had promised to join him. She was with Denise and Jackie when the new families arrived. She had planned to leave after the welcome speech. But when one of the military women entered the room, Claudia froze on the spot. Maureen Soler, her best friend at the time, had just come in. She was right, she was beautiful and well. Denise went to greet him, followed by Jackie. Maureen's eyes were attracted by a person coming towards her.

Mau: Claudia Joy?

Claudia nodded. She could not speak, her tears not far away. She was so touched to see her again.

Mau: I can not believe it!

They took each other in their arms. Then they detached themselves.

Mau: But what are you doing here?
C: I'm part of the FRG in a way. Like Denise and Jackie, I came to welcome new families on the base.
Mau: I can not believe that we meet after all these years.
C: When Denise told me your name, I did not believe it either. And I came to understand that it could only be you.
Mau: How long have you been here?
C: In Fort Marshall? Soon 10 years. I guess it's an innate chance, but Michael was promoted every time a place for his rank was released, which allowed us not to start from the bottom. Just like Denise.
Mau: I'm so happy to see you again. You know that I followed your advice. I love my life in the army.
C: I'm glad to hear it. Come and sit down. Denise and Jackie will soon make their welcome speech.
Mau: Are we on the same table?
C: No I leave right after, I have to join my husband for an important dinner.
Mau: Wait ... Is Michael General Holden everyone's talking to me?
C: Yes it's him.
Mau: General three stars ... you made a pretty path both.
C: That's right.
Mau: It's a shame not to be able to talk longer.
C: Yes, it's true that it's a shame. But what do you say coming home tomorrow afternoon? We will remember our memories.
Mau: Very good idea.
C: 15h?
Mau: Perfect.
C: I can not wait to be there. Tomorrow then.

They kissed each other. Claudia disappeared and the little party continued for the rest of the guests. She joined Michael at home where he finished getting ready. He arrived at the entrance where Claudia was waiting for him.

M: Claudia, are you ok ?
C: Oh yes, you'll never guess who I saw ...
M: It was Maureen right?
C: She has not changed. She comes to have a tea tomorrow afternoon at home.
M: I hope to be back in time. You know I have a big lunch. Hoping it does not drag on. Let's go ?

They went to their dinner with other generals. Michael was happy to see that Claudia was taking charge of her life and that everything was getting better. When they came back at the end of the evening, they went up to sleep quickly.

M: Thank you for having accompanied me tonight.
C: That's normal honey. And it's been a long time since I had accompanied you, but that's my role.
M: I know, but ... right now ...
C: Did you think I would not have the strength?
M: I thought you did not want to face the eyes of others.
C: With you by my side, I can face everything.
M: I am so proud of the path you have traveled. I love you Claudia.

He kissed his wife with great tenderness. Claudia deepened their kiss but could not go further. A certain anxiety was always present in her. She broke away from Michael.

C: I'm sorry Michael.
M: Do not worry, everything is fine. I do not want you to feel bad or anything else.
C: But I can not give you what you want.
M: Claudia, I feel like it since the day I came home. But what matters to me at the moment is that you are fully recovered.
C: I still have this anguish in my heart. I do not know where it comes from or why I still feel that way.
M: Honey, give yourself time. You have taken a simpler and less stressful way of life. You have resumed your official duties towards me and the army. I think you're nervous about getting your job back. And this because in the end your work is surely linked with this anxiety.
C: That's what you think?
M: Yes, but only time will help you understand.

Michael took Claudia in her arms and cuddled her. He was so happy to be at home, to be able to find her every night and every weekend. When he met him, he loved it right away. He had wanted to make a living with her, to marry her. He knew that one day or another he would go on a mission but he would never have imagined to attach so much to her, to love him so much. She had missed him every time. He had lived with her every day, taking advantage of every second. His presence was enough for him. He was waiting to find her, but he was waiting for Claudia to be ready. They ended up falling asleep in each other's arms.
The next day, Michael went to lunch with colleagues. Claudia had lunch with Denise and then returned home. As expected, Maureen arrived on time. Michael had not returned yet.

C: Come in, please.
Mau: You have a beautiful house Claudia!
C: Thank you.
Mau: This base is really beautiful.
C: It's really a beautiful place, it's true. And Charleston is really a beautiful city.

They settled in the living room. Claudia had made tea.

C: You know, it really made it strange to know you were on the same basis as me.
Mau: I never thought I'd see you again.
C: Me too. I met so many people. Especially since Michael rose to the rank of general star. But I never forgot my friends at the time. There has been little to tell the truth. As Denise has now you have been one of my best friend Maureen.
Mau: And was mutual. You taught me everything and showed what a military woman should be. I owe you a lot you know.
C: It was normal, I always wanted to help in this way. We had good times together.
Mau: His yes. Do you remember that you almost gave birth in your little room?

Claudia laughed.

C: Oh God!

His gaze was lost in the garden, through the window. She remembered the birth of Emmalin. She thought back to her daughter, who was still in Woodsen. She did not return until three months later. She missed him a lot. She returned to the conversation.

C: Without you it could have happened it's true. It's so far away. And you, what do you do ?
Mau: I do not work, I took care of our two boys. They are 14 and 16 years old. But I have a sewing blog, it takes care of me. I think integrated the FRG of the base too.

The same age that Amande and Emmalin had when they arrived in Fort Marshall. Michael appeared then.

C: Honey, here you are.

He kissed Claudia quickly.

C: Do you remember Maureen?
M: Of course. It's crazy to meet again after so much time.
Mau: Hello Michael. Indeed it is unexpected even.

Michael settled on the couch in front of them.

M: A nice coincidence.
C: Maureen told me that with her husband they have two boys.
Mau: And you, how are Amanda and Emmalin?

This question cast a cold. Claudia looked at Michael. He did not intervene. He wanted Claudia to tell her herself. The latter began by giving news of Emmalin.

C: Emmalin is in Woodsen, in the Hockey section. She would like to join a big team so she can go on the women's national team.
Mau: Congratulations to her.
C: Otherwise she would like to do Psychologist.

Mau: I think she wants to help others from her mom.
M: We are almost certain.
Mau: And Amanda, she must have finished her studies now right? I remember that little two-year-old, who looked like two drops of water to her mother. Given the photos, it has not changed, it really looks like Claudia.
C: I ... Maureen ...

Michael gave him a comforting look. He wanted Claudia to say his words. He knew that Claudia would react violently afterwards. And he was right.