"Madara!" Itachi screeched. "Never you sick bastard." Itachi hissed at the shark. Madara came rushing down the stairs it see a screeching Itachi and a shark with a ring. "Err...?" Madara said. Itachi stared at him.
Madara ended up knocking Kisame out bad freeing Itachi. "Jeez that shark is sick." Madara said hugging Itachi. "Hn." Itachi replied.
"Jeezus it's 3:00 am." Madara said tiredly. "Hn."
Itachi suddenly wailed. "Itachi are you okay?" Madara asked worried. Itachi shook his head. "I feel like I'm going to puke." Itachi hissed through gritted teeth. Madara nodded as they went to the bathroom. The moment they we're there Itachi puked. Madara held up Itachis hair. Madara was worried what if it Itachi was sick or worse.
Itachi was done puking. "You okay Itachi?" Madara asked. Itachi nodded and with that they went to sleep at 4:00 am.
This went on for quite a few weeks and Madara was quite worried Itachi puked almost every morning and was getting lazy. "Itachi I signed you up for a doctor appointment." Madara said to his weasel. Itachi nodded and sighed. "I love you you know." Madara said as he planted a kiss on Itachis head. "I love you to Madara." Itachi said. "The appointment is in a hour so get ready.
Time passed quickly and they were there in the waiting room. "Madara Uchia And Itachi Uchia." A lady from the front desk called and people around stopped what they were doing and slowly looked terrified.
The 2 went to the room. "Sir would you go wait outside for a few minutes." The nurse said not really asking more demanding. Madara nodded and left.
He waited then the nurse motioned him Back in not ready for what he was about to hear or see. The nurse sat them both down and said. "Itachi is pregnant would you like to see a picture of the child?" The nurse said sounding like this was normal. Itachi blinked and Madara stared. "Picture now!" Itachi and Madara said angrily because they had not made love.
Itachi was pretty confused but Madara was almost sure he knew who's child it was. The nurse came back with a picture and showed the couple. Itachi and Madara gasped then Itachi hid his face into Madaras sleeve and started to cry tears of sadness. Madara patted his head the child was blue skinned and had scare in it's cheeks. The child was Kisames.
"And one thing the child is dead but we cannot take it out because it could take Itachis Sharingan so Itachi wouldn't have it. Itachi cried even more.
"Thank you well we'll be going now." Madara said as he left with Itachi still crying.
Konan and Pein were waiting in the car because apparently they didn't trust the Uchiah with the car. They were both surprised when Madara and Itachi got in the car and Itachi was crying which was something he had never done before.
"What happened?" Konan asked and waited a few moments for a reply. Itachi was still sobbing into Madaras sleeve. Pein had already passed Madara the tissue. "Kisame impregnated Itachi with a dead child." Madara said coldly. Pein and Konan were shocked. "Oh my god Itachi it's okay." Konan said as she turn d around and patted Itachis back. "Th-thank you Konan.
Pein started driving and the only noises that could be heard were Itachis crying and Madara trying to soothe him.
The 4 entered the house Itachi had stopped crying and Pein and Madara we're indeed very close friends now.
"KISAME ME AND MADARA NEED TO TALK TO YOU!" Pein raged. "Yes Leader-sama?" Kisame asked not sure what happened. "I warned you shark to not do anything to Itachi and you did Sasori bring me the bat!" Pein barked to Sasori and Kisame.
—/-/-flashback-/-/—
Kisame was called into Peins office he wondered what happened leader couldn't have known what happened with Itachi could he? The question stayed in Kisames mind until he entered and found Pein stroking a stuffed white cat. Pein also had a hook on one hand a eyepatch on a eye and was stroking a stuffed cat well glaring at Kisame. Kisame wondered again in his mind...Is leader-sama delusional or just plain insane?
"Kisame sit!"
Kisame sat.
"What do oh need me for leader-sama?"
"You raped a fellow member."
"And?" Kisame didn't realize he had said and because his leader was dressed insanely.
"The Akatsuki may be murderers but that is to far!"
"Understood sir."
"You will make me a promise."
"What is this promise?"
"If you harm a hair on Itachis head or do anything to make him sad or mad or affect his health."
"You will be beaten severely by me and Sasori am I understood?"
"Yes sir."
"Are you absolutely sure?"
"Yes I am absolutely sure.
"Now get out of my sight I don't look at scum!"
—/-/-end flashback-/-/—
"Your punishment is now Kisame!" Pein laughed maniacally. "Yes leader-sans." Kisame shuddered.
Sasori came out snickering like a hyena holding a metal bat. Kisame winced. "Everyone leave now well Kisame takes his punishment." Pein ordered.
The Akatsuki left leaving Pein and Kisame alone in the living room. "What happened?" Everyone but Madara and Itachi asked to the 2 in unison. Itachis face went blank he ignored the question and went into his room. "Tell them if you want Madara." Itachi shouted as his door slammed shut.
"Kisame ra-." Madara was cut off as a few sharp cracks could be heard and Kisame pleading against leader. "Raped Itachi And impregnated him with a dead child." Madara left quickly before he would be asked more questions.
Madara entered his room to see his weasel sitting on their bed crying. Madara knew to stay quiet. He walked over to Itachi and sat down next to him. "Hey angel it's okay sharks never gonna do that to you again.
Itachi only sniffled more. "You promise Mada?" Itachi asked blinking away his tears. "Of course I do angel." Madara promised. Another crack could be heard. Itachi only smiled and that is pretty odd Itachi only smiles when he's planning something.
Madara looked down at Itachi to see he's drifted asleep. Madara then started talking to himself. "Itachi sometimes I wonder how you made it in here when you get captured so easily...". Madara sighed as he fell asleep with Itachi.
Itachi woke early this morning for some reason. He sighed and looked over to see Madara sleeping.
He suddenly felt the urge to puke so he did.
Madara woke and couldn't see Itachi so he instantly knew were he was. Madara got up and walked over toward the bathroom to see his beloved retching his guts out. Madara held up Itachis hair like every day.
Itachi had been pregnant about 2 months now.
"Thanks Madara." Itachi whimpered once he was done. "No problem Itachi." Madara said. "I'm going down for breakfast you coming?" Madara asked curiously. "Sure." Itachi replied.
Worst thing was after Itachi got home from the hospital he hadn't come out of the room so no one but Madara had seen him for about 3 weeks. Breakfast was ad bad as usual.
Itachi and Madara sat down at the table. "Oh Itachi you finally joined us!" Zetsu said. "Hn." Itachi said. "Well technically it wasn't rape Itachi and do you know why because we never broke up." Kisam s voice broke through the room. "Well then I'm breaking up with you goodbye Kisame Hoshigaki." Itachi smiled only a smile the devil could muster.
"Wow Tobi thought Itachi was a good boy." Tobi muttered in his mask. "He's not a good boy Tobi." Deidara snickered. "Why not?" Tobi asked innocently. "Because He and Madara are in love." Hidan cooed. "But Tobi thought Madara loved him." Tobi said sadly. Itachi blinked curiously as did everyone but Madara. "Oh wait that was Zetsu." Tobi said confused. Itachi happily sighed. "Zetsu and you...?" Kakuzu smirked. Tobi nodded proudly.
"Itachi you cant go on missions with the child so you have to stay here." Peins voice pounded through the halls. Itachi moaned. "Madara Your his partner you'll have to stay with him." Pein said coming into view. "But everyone including you 2 have to cm e shopping with us so into the car." Konan screeched.
"Get away from Itachi freak!" Konan screamed as she hit Kisame on the head with her purse. "Owww...Konan!" Kisame whined. Madara picked up Itachi and put him in the seat next to far window. "Itachi you need to eat more seriously your really light." Madara stated. Itachi moaned again.
The car ride was quite peaceful Madara basically leaned on Itachi hugging and kissing him the entire time well Deidara was hugging Sasori muttering Dana Dana.
There were there quickly. "Everyone get what you need be here in 1 hour." Pein commanded.
Kisames shopping experience
Kisame wondered around all he needed was a new female fish a huge tank and food. He walked over to the fish section and started to examine them all. There were fish of all types clownfish, pufferfish And Siamese fighting fish and many more.
His eyes fell on a certain Mandarinfish how dare they keep such a beauty kept in such a ugly home. Kisame marched over to the manager angrily. "How much is she?" Kisame asked pointing at the Mandarin. ""$399.99." The manager said. Kisame nodded and grabbed a bad filled with water the manger watched until he realized Kisame was stealing the most expensive fish there. Kisame also snatched a tank and food somehow...
"Hey back with that
Thief
Thief." The manager started to yell.
Kisame kept running until he was caught by he police. "Hey you stop." A few police yelled and Kisame was pounced in with the fish and everything else and was put in a police car.
Zetsu shopping experience
Zetsu walked through the plant section...he was finally going to find her...the plant of his dream. He entered the section to see her. "Her name is Veronica." Zetsu said as he sat down and started to hug the plant.
"Sir I think someone's trying to make out with your plant over there." A passerbyer said and pointed at Zetsu. The cashier nodded. "Excuse me how much is she?" Zetsu asked the cashier. "$100.00 exactly do you want it?" The cashier said freaked. "No money is to much for a life or a beauty as beautiful as this one!" Zetsu screamed. "So you want it...or not?" The cashier said sounding rather confused. "Of course I want her here's the money and get her in a cart." Zetsu shouted like a excited puppy not realizing he had handed the cashier a $1000. "Uh...uh sure thing sir." The cashier said happily.
And with that Zetsu went up front to wait for the rest of the Akatsuki.
Deidara and Sasori shopping experience
"Dana Dana look there's a bunch of clay I can use can we get it please please!" Deidara said extremely quickly. "If it's necessary." Sasori said. "It is It is!" Deidara screamed like a little girl as he put tons of clay into the cart. "What is a amateur like you doing with all that clay." A rude boy wearing a high school jacket said to Deidara. "Would you like me to show you?" Deidara said happily bouncing. "Uh yea cause it probably can't be good!" The boy laughed. Sasori just sighed. "Ok come here come here." The boy came to see Deidara holding a little bird. "Now hold it for a second!" Deidara commanded and so the boy held it. "KATSU!" Deidara screamed and with that the bird exploded and the boy was sent sailing off into the store.
"Ok now we just need to me some wood for m-". Sasori said but was cut off as the boy and police officers arrived. "And you know I was kind of hoping to get wood today." Sasori muttered. "Your under arrest for attacking a citizen." A police said well another delivered them to the car. "Oh hi Kisame!" Deidara announces seeing Kisame in the same squad car as them. "Oh hi Sasori and Deidara what are you guys doing here?" Kisame asked
"Well I kinda blew up some boys face and then we got caught by the cops blah blah un." Deidara said happily. "Huh ok." Kisame said giving them a thumbs up and with that Sasori just sighed(again).
Hidans and Kakuzus shopping experience
"Ok so we need food and clothes and nothing else Hidan...Hidan...? Hidan were are you!" Kakuzu screamed last looking up from his shopping list to not see his partner but to see a small part of the store on fire with black flames and people running. "Those stupid Uchias." Kakuzu muttered but went searching for his partner. "I heard that zombie." A voice that sounded like Madara screeched but Kakuzu ignored it and went on the hunt for the notorious Hidan.
"Oh my god!" Hidan squealed like a 3 year old as he jumped p and down as he stood before all the kitchen knives and reached out to grab one but was stopped bye a old hand. "No Hidan." Kakuzu said he had found him. "Only 2." Kakuzu said apparently there on a budget. "Fine...". Hidan said but instead grabbed a few knives ripping them open and running away from Kakuzu. "Join the way of Jashin." Hidan screeched chasing a young women around with a knife. "Stop Ahhhhh help me there's a psychopath chasing me help." The women screamed taking a turn around a corner.
"Hidan stop please...". Kakuzu panted as he capuchin up to Hidan to see him being taken away by the police. "Do you know this man!" A police asked. "Nope!" And with that Kakuzu ran to the register only to see Tobi checking out what looked like $1,000,000,000 worth of sugar. Tobi paid it off and Kakuzu fell to the floor clutching one of his hearts. "Your a bad boy Tobi." Kakuzu gasped out before fainting out and being sent to the hide out.
Tobis shopping experience
"Tobi needs tons of sugar!" Tobi yelled and that was that he bought the stores supply of sugar and went off to the car to wait.
Pein and Konans shopping experience
"Sh Konan What do you need again?" Pein asked for the bazillionith time. "Just clothes and what do you need?" She asked well piling tons of clothes into the shopping cart. "Fire extinguishers thanks to the Uchias a new kitchen sink thanks to Hidan lollipops for Tobi and no more." He said.
"Well I have all my clothes so let's go get the stuff you need ok?" Konan said not waiting for a answer but walking down the aisle.
They got all there stuff but was stopped when they Smelled was that sugar...? "Tons of sugar." Konan commented and Pein nodded his head. "I doubt it was the Akatsuki because then Kakuzu would be dead." Pein added. They quickly got the stuff they needed and went to check out. "Everyone should be here in 10 minutes." Konan said and pein nodded.
Madara and Itachis shopping experience
Itachi and Madara were walking around the store the couple didn't need anything. Every once in a while someone would whistle in there direction or howl in a store there are children! Well that happened Madara would always end up growling and hugging Itachi. "I'm not a possession Mada." Itachi whispered. "Well these people probably think you are!" Madara hissed. Itachi rolled his eyes. "What do we need angel?" Madara asked looking around. "Hn." Madara got pretty used to knowing Itachis hns if they were yes or no. This one was a I don't know. "Just stuff that's essential." Itachi muttered. "What do you need Tachi." Madara asked and Itachi just shrugged. "What do you need Madara." Itachi asked him this time.
They both settled on something they both needed hairbrushes. "Now that we got those let's go check out." Madara said but was stopped when he heard someone howl his last nerve had just broken so had Itachis. It wasn't that bad well kinda yes ok it was pretty bad. Madara hunted down everyone who even looked at Itachi. Then some guy came up and asked Itachi out and that's how the ameratsu started.
"Those stupid Uchiha." A voice running boy said that sounded like Kakuzu. "I heard that zombie!" Madara screeched in Kakuzuz direction. "Hey stop get them!" A police officer yelled seeing the incident. Madara tried to fight but Itachi didn't care. "Madara stop trust me we can easily get out." Itachi said calming Madara. "Ok angel." Madara agreed. "Put them with the rest of em." A police yelled.
They were about to get in the car but we're stopped when Itachi saw basically everyone in Akatsuki sitting there. "Madara break out time." Itachi muttered and so they did with that the Akatsuki ran down the parking lot to the hide out.