The Arrangement

by sarenelsoria

Bilbo never joins quest and Middle Earth has a hard winter, both the Shire and Erebor nearly Bilbo goes to seek aide from Erebor, in order to prevent the hobbits from being defenseless.He thinks to prepose a trade of skills, learning fighting and teaching the dwarves how to farm. He does not expect Thorin to believe that he has found his ONE, hobbits don't believe in ONES

6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

Bilbo woke at four in the morning the next day and grabbed his shopping bags; he then woke the other dwarves, who stared sleepily at him, as he made tea. "We need to get there extra early today." Bilbo told them and they looked at him like he was crazy, as he lead them to the market telling them to wait in certain spots and not to move. However as the sky brightened and more and more people came to the market, they realized that Bilbo had made it so they would have first pick of what was on offer, at the best booths. They bought enough for themselves and for the army to last a week, putting it into the wagon, as Bilbo paid for the supplies.

"How much gold do you have?" Thorin questioned.

"What I'm paying with is a chit, for the harvest." Bilbo replied. "Or for last year's wine or cider, depending upon what venders like best."

"I brought enough gold to help supply the army." Thorin stated and Bilbo nodded.

"It's really up to me to support them though, I can't expect Grandfather to do so and others will be helping." He assured Thorin and Thorin nodded. He filled up the wagon and stopped off first at the two dwarven encampments, before giving the fruits and vegetables they had bought to the elves. They then went back home with the wagon.

"So what do you want to do today?" Bilbo questioned.

"What is there to do around here?" Thorin asked.

"I'm going to spend much of the day in the garden, making sure everything is alright, you could help me, if you wanted to learn something about it, or you could go to the forges." Bilbo said and shrugged. "I know that gardening and growing things isn't something your particularly interested in."

"You wouldn't want me in your garden; I have what men call a black thumb."

"Everyone has a black thumb at first, you can water the flowers, and you won't kill anything that way." Bilbo offered and Thorin smiled, before nodding, they walked back into the back garden and Bilbo smiled as he handed Thorin a sunhat and took one for himself. He put the hat on and weeded his garden. Hamfast had been taking good care of the place and the blackberries were ripe. He picked the blackberries and went back into the house, calling for Thorin to follow him. He then brought him into the kitchen. "Have you ever made pie dough?"

"Can't say that I have." Thorin admitted, as the other dwarves tried not to stare, as Bilbo started getting out ingredients and measuring tools.

"It's pretty hard to screw up, you can stir the dough." Bilbo said and Thorin stared at him.

"I'm bad in the kitchen."

"If you mess up its not the end of the world, there will be a wheat harvest soon and we'll buy the wheat to take to the miller then." He said and smiled, before starting to measure ingredients as Thorin mixed them. It was clear that he didn't have much practice with this sort of thing; he held the spoon like a fauntling would, before Bilbo gently corrected his grip. "Not like that like this."

"It was fine before."

"Thorin just try it, I wouldn't question you in the proper way to hold a sword, don't question me in this." Bilbo stated and Thorin stared at him in shock, as he stirred.

"It's easier this way." Thorin admitted grudgingly and was rewarded with a smile.

"Was that hard to admit, sir grumps a lot?" Bilbo asked and the other dwarves were quiet, as Thorin laughed.

"I don't believe anyone has ever called me that."

"No how about his royal grumpy pants? King of The Long Faces?" He asked and Thorin was soon doubled over laughing, forgetting the bowl and toppling it over his shirt, which made them both laugh even more. "Looks like the dough is salvageable, see you didn't ruin it." Bilbo said and rolled it out onto the counter top, making enough for several pies. He then took out his pie dishes and added sugar to the berries, before putting them in the pie pans. He had picked enough for four pies and gently moved the crust so it would bake right, before putting all four in the oven and setting his kitchen timer before cleaning up with Thorin. Thorin was a bit like a bull in a china shop in the kitchen, it seemed like he was almost always in the way Bilbo tripped over him at the worst possible time, spilling flour over them both. He took one look at the flour covered dwarf and laughed, as he shook flour out his own hair and dusted off his flour covered clothing. "Well there wasn't that much left in the bag, but it went everywhere, do you need help with your hair, or beard." Bilbo offered shyly and Thorin blushed before nodding. Bilbo washed out his hair in the sink, before stripping to his small clothes; his since of modesty had more or less gone out the window, in traveling to Erebor. He took Thorin's overcoat from him, as he gently washed Thorin's hair in the sink, making sure that the flour was removed.
"You need to remove your pants; I don't want it spreading throughout the house." Bilbo stated and felt his body blush.

"I don't wear small clothes, I find them to be flammable and got used to not wearing them as a young man." Thorin admitted.

"Well then dust off as best you can." Bilbo said, taking Thorin's shirt from him and adding it to the pile. He watched as Thorin tried to dust himself off and failed miserably. "Here let me help." Bilbo brushed the flour from Thorin's legs, up to his thighs. "I erm think that should be enough." He said they were both red, from embarrassment, or so Bilbo believed. He took the clothes up and put them into the sink, rinsing out the flour as best he could, before adding them to the wash pile for laundry day.

He walked to his room and got on a fresh pair of trousers and a fresh shirt, before going back and waiting at the table by the kitchen for his timer to go off. Once it did, he opened his freeze box and took out some chilled cream, whipping it up and putting it on the counter in a bowl. He then served himself four slices and added the whipped cream.

"So you made those for breakfast?" Thorin asked and Bilbo nodded grinning.

"I love berries and whipped cream, especially when they are hot and gooey." Bilbo said and blew on his bite with a fork, as Kili sat down.

"Is this some strange hobbit courting ritual, because if it is, do we really need to be in the house?" Kili demanded and Bilbo nearly spat out his pie as he laughed.

"The flour spill was an accident and this, well this is breakfast." Bilbo stated. "Strange hobbit rituals involve dancing naked at the party tree for fertility."

"What really?" Kili demanded and Bilbo grinned.

"Well our young people aren't invited to those parties, but it doesn't stop them from attending, it's more of a clothing optional thing and we've arrived just in time for it. I don't think I'll be dancing the tree this year however. So do you have any fertility rituals?"

"None save the stone carving, or perhaps our winters that are long, most babies are both created and born during winter." Thorin said and Bilbo laughed.

"Really you only put the wick in the candle during winter?"

"No, we do it at other times as well, how did we get into this conversation."

"How often."

"It depends on the couple, really Bilbo this isn't something that we should talk about in front of everyone."

"Why not, everyone seems very interested in our bed sport anyway, you wouldn't believe some of the jokes I overheard."

"You overheard jokes?"

"It's hard to keep a language secret, when it goes along with obvious hand movements. The king should give the hobbit a right proper fucking was a very popular turn of phrase, then dwarf one would point to me and dwarf two would laugh. I mean after a while it's obvious." Bilbo stated and everyone stared at him, as he went back to his pie. "So are you going to have any, I know that the appetites of hobbits are legendary, in and out of the bedroom. But seriously this is just too much food for just me."

"Do you know what you are saying Bilbo?" Thorin asked.

"How dirty is it, on a scale between filthy and disgusting, admittedly some words are illusive, what does legendary mean because that one has stumped me for quite some time."

"What do you think it means?" Thorin asked and sat down at the table.

"I wouldn't know, incredible is doubtful, as is horrible, I'd suggest amazing but then again that's a bit prideful." Bilbo said.

"Legendary, your people have a reputation for being a rather lusty race."

"We're just more open about it, when in private. Hobbits love big families and the only way to get big families even with Yavannah's blessing, unless you have a one is putting his anvil in her oven. You dwarves and you're forging references."

"Are all your khudzul words dirty?" Kili demanded.

"Most, because those are the most obvious. I should fuck him sideways, because everyone expects me to." Bilbo said.

"What happened to courting?"

"Midsummer in the Shire happened, it's sort of a traditional time and I'd rather not explain the whole destined for one another thing to my family and just get married. We can control when we have kids right, because I don't want to watch over a stone child or something, while there's a war at our doorstep."

"It would be a baby and Mahuel determines the time of carving." Thorin said and Bilbo frowned.

"Well then pray to him, that he doesn't decide to start you carving in the middle of a war." Bilbo said. "Because I don't want to bring a baby into this disaster."

"You think its going to be a disaster?"

"Any war is a disaster for me, any death a calamity; I didn't like killing those wolves even." Bilbo stated.

"How did you find so many anyway?"

"Keen hearing." Bilbo replied. "Keener eyesight and quick reflexes." He stated and ate his pie. "So are you going to go to the forge today?"

"Its going to be crowded on the first day, I'll most likely wait a week before asking for one of the forges for us." Thorin said and the others nodded. "Its awkward trying to share a space so small with more than eight people and dangerous, I spoke with everyone and we have a slot six days from now. How often are the markets?"

"I go on Wednesdays as they are the best days in my opinion, my Da built here because of the market which is the best around. However other markets are open in other towns and there is also fishing and trapping if you know how."

"Some might where would you go to trap and hunt."

"The forest outside of Tooksburouh, don't hunt near the wild forest, they let you pass if you don't harm anything, but otherwise people can go missing." Bilbo said and showed them from his porch. "If you start to feel like you shouldn't be in the forest anymore, you've reached the wild woods and you should turn back." He stated and Thorin nodded.

"What about stone, is there any stone near here, I'd like to make you some beads." He said.

"Not a lot of call for stone in the Shire, but there's some along the river beds, I can take you, but I can't go into the water, hobbits are terrible at swimming, some say that our feet make us sink like stones." Bilbo shrugged. "My Ma taught me, but I wound up drinking a lot of water and not enjoying myself over much. Baths are well and good, but I don't like wading in rivers." He said and stretched out his shoulders, before giving Thorin a peck on the cheek and racing off into the woods surrounding his property. Thorin stared after the hobbit wondering what had gotten into him and shook his head. He went back inside and pulled up some chain link starting to make an arm band. Bilbo was gone a long time and Thorin was starting to worry, when he returned, with eight rabbits. "It sounded like you wanted meat, so I brought some." He said and Thorin stared at Bilbo in shocked surprise, where was the hobbit he'd known and who was this wild creature.

"Thank you Bilbo, Bombur, Bilbo brought rabbits, lets skin them together."

"Leave the skinning to me, Dwalin, Bofur and Kili, Bifur and you take up too much of the meat and Bilbo shouldn't have to skin as well as hunt them." Bombur said and Bilbo sat in his chair, but he was more fidgety than normal. Thorin stared at him as his leg started to thump and he stopped it.

"Bilbo have you been drinking."

"No it's mating season." Bilbo admitted and Thorin looked shocked. "Yavannah blesses the woods and lands of the Shire to be ever fertile, but four times a year everything grows and everything multiplies. Its part of being on this land, most likely you'll feel it too in a few days, the men that have visited certainly have."

"So we're going to go through three of your Yavannah blessed mating cycles?" Thorin demanded and Bilbo nodded. "Sometimes other races join our fertility rights, but they don't like what it does to them, how wild and untamed they become." Bilbo stated and Thorin stared at Bilbo as he removed his shirt. "It's hot in here.

"Everyone out of the house." Thorin commanded.

"We could just go to the bedroom." Bilbo's eyes which were normally honey brown were more golden. "I'm a Halfling descended from men that crossed into the mother's valley and were changed by her cycles." Bilbo said and Thorin's eyes widened.

"Will I be changed?"

"Not like I am, not like our children will be if they come to the Shire during the time of mating." Bilbo replied and then he was devouring Thorin's lips hungrily, Thorin stared at the hobbit in his arms, before he felt some curious power enter him and he kissed Bilbo in return. He grabbed the hobbits hand and went to their room. He stared at Bilbo moaned and whimpered on the bed. "Fuck me Thorin, please fuck me, then I'll fuck you." He said and Thorin was completely lost in the haze. He kissed Bilbo, before rolling him to his back and straddling him, pounding deeply into him, as Bilbo cried out and moaned and screamed and bucked against him. Thorin groaned, riding Bilbo was like riding a wild animal, the best sex he'd had in his life, then he suddenly pulled out and flipped to his stomach as his hobbit buried himself into his bottom and rocked against him, hitting a spot deep inside him that made him cry out. "Aule yes Bilbo, harder, faster! Like that just like that!" Thorin called out and spilled against the sheets, before grabbing Bilbo's hand and racing to the call that thundered through his ears. He watched as they moved along the river bank, as if seeing it all from a distance, a part of his body and yet not, as Bilbo picked up a stone that fit snugly into his arms and Thorin smiled, yes it was the perfect stone and he already knew what the child would look like. He took out his tools and handed one to Bilbo as they carved away at the stone, revealing a perfect little baby girl, but the call wasn't finished and Bilbo carried another stone, this time even larger than the first, helping Thorin to carve it, into the shape of a little boy. The third they found was a little girl, the fourth a little boy, the fifth was another boy that looked a lot like Thorin and the sixth and final child was a little boy that looked like Bilbo, except for the ears, which weren't quite either of them. They carried the stones back with them to Bilbo's house and set them away carefully, as the spell lifted.

"What happened?" Thorin asked Bilbo who shook his head.

"I don't know, that's part of Yavannah's blessing." Bilbo replied. "Did you fall under it?" Bilbo asked and Thorin stared at him.

"You didn't believe in ones, but you knew about this?" Thorin demanded and Bilbo nodded, frowning.

"We should stay inside, the next four days will be crazy."

"This lasts for four days?" Thorin demanded.

"I'm not sure how long it's been, maybe we should go to the elders, and they tend to stay in one place, away from all their children, grandchildren and nieces and nephews fucking each other blind." Bilbo stated casually and walked with Thorin outside, Thorin stared at the people all around him, he didn't expect to find Bifur cock deep in Dwalin's ass, he didn't know what had gotten into anyone, and uneasy was an understatement. Bilbo seemed completely unfazed and smiled at a fauntling even. "Hello little one, your parents got the need."

"I'm going to be a big sister!" The little girl said and smiled. "I can't wait until my first needing with the man I love." She said and Bilbo smiled, taking her hand. "It looks like fun."

"Remember what you promise the great mother."

"Not to try it until I'm of age, but that's so long away." She complained.

"I'll take you with me to where the other children are, how about that?" Bilbo asked and the little girl nodded, He walked with her to the house in Tooksburouh and stared at the sign at the door. Dwarves have gone slightly crazy with needing, if you've recovered, we're staying at Peony Proudfoots, send all fauntlings there." The note read and Bilbo heard a crash from inside the manor. "Let's get you to auntie Peony's Palmonia." Bilbo said and put the little girl on his shoulders, walking with her to the house the elders were staying at with the children. He knocked on the door and Peony answered it grinning.

"How are you Bilbo, didn't expect to see you so soon!" She said and giggled.

"Yes yes, its all very funny and delightful I'm sure, but we found this little one wandering the streets and thought it was better if we waited here with you for it to end, its all a bit of a culture shock to poor Thorin." Bilbo said. "Do you have any of your honey cakes left and some of that tea?"

"Of course dear, you must be starving, come in, come in." She said and Bilbo grinned following her inside. He ate a large stack of honey cakes, as Thorin did the same, before standing.

"I'm going to check to make sure everyone is alright, you can stay here Thorin." Bilbo stated and Thorin nodded, as Bilbo walked over to the elven encampment first and stared in shock at what some of the elves were doing to each other, amidst Legolas who was trying to stop them doing it to one another. "I should have warned you, but it's just a part of my culture, they won't stop until the spell breaks, you can come with me though if you like." Bilbo offered and Legolas looked at the hobbit as though Bilbo promised salvation.

"They won't remain like this forever."

"Valar no, only for the next four days."

"Four days?" Legolas said weakly.

"Yes, I should check my house for rock babies, I suppose we woke early because we got our carving done. Making children the old fashioned way takes so much longer."

"So most of my army..."

"Will be pregnant, I had no idea you brought so many women with you." Bilbo frowned. "Admittedly it could pose a problem."

"A problem, we're about to be beset by orks and you say this could pose a problem, do you have any idea of how rare an elfling is, how precious?" Legolas demanded.

"Well it works that way for hobbits, it might work differently for elves, will you come with me to the other encampments, or do you want to go to my aunts and be with Thorin, ooh I will have to try that at some point." Bilbo stated as a man fucked another man against a tree. "Though the needles must be uncomfortable I imagine." He said and Legolas' eyes rolled up in his head as he fainted, Bilbo sighed before walking to the next encampment and staring. Several elf women had made it from the vineyard to this dwarven encampment as had Kili who was fucking an elven maid. Bilbo shook his head, he imagined that all involved would be glad not to remember this incident, but he memorized the face of the women, just in case Kili became a father, still the same women didn't stay with just one partner like some people were. He didn't find anyone who had broken the spell in that encampment, so he walked to his grandfather's house and entered it. He stared at the mass of unconscious people and Balin who was wielding a club in astonishment.

"What in the name of Mahuel is going on."

"Yavannah's fertility cycle, that's one way of controlling the population." He said weakly and Balin stared at him. "We passed Dwalin fucking Bifur, so you might want to take care of that."

"How can you be so calm about this?" Balin demanded. "These people have gone insane and are fucking everything that moves."

"Not everything, though Kili has a decided preference for multiple women at the same time, not just that but elves. I should have told you about this, I'm sorry, but with everything I forgot to be honest."

"How in the name of Mahuel do you forget about something like this, I'm going after my brother and then to the other encampment, this is wrong people should have free will."

"Oh they have free will, they decide who they fuck and how and how often, it's just sort of like any other urge, and you're an elder so you don't feel it anymore." He said and Balin stared at him. "Men take longer to stop the cycle than women, but they do stop at around eighty or so, women stop at sixty. I hear it's quite enjoyable to not be completely lost to the urges and have your partner lost to the mating, I don't know I don't think I'll ever experience that. Well anyway I'm headed back home, you do realize that when this lot wake up, they will just go at it again?" Bilbo asked. "You might be better putting down the cudgel and going with me to the meeting of the elders, but first I need to find where we put our babies."

"You lost Thorin's heirs?"

"I think we had a couple, once the urge stops it's like the hangover from hell, you don't remember anything. Anyway I'm headed back to my house." He said and took off for Bagend. He heard the crying from outside and rushed to the larder. He found a baby amidst six stone statues and held the little one gently, staring at his eyes which were Bilbo's but the rest of him was all Thorin. He packed the other stone babies into a bag and headed over with the rabbits in one hand and the infant pressed against him in the other, swaddled in a stained shirt of Bilbo's. He was glad that it was a warm day and the child wouldn't catch cold. He jounced the baby as he walked and the little one finally stopped crying, staring up at him and Bilbo smiled at his son. He knocked on the door with his foot and Peony answered it, staring at the little one in shock. "Male dwarves do it differently, this is our son." Bilbo said and Thorin fainted. "Now can someone get junior some clothes."

"What are you going to name him?" Amaranth Clearheel asked.

"I'm going to let his father help decide that." Bilbo said and shook his head at Thorin. "I think it all was a bit much for him, once the high of the mating rite fades, its going to be a bit much for me too." He said and smiled at his family, as he was given diapers and a bottle of goat's milk. "Drink up junior, that's a lad, Da's got you, your Pa's a silly bugger but we love him anyway." Bilbo paused realizing that he did love the impossible dwarf, that perhaps a part of him had always loved Thorin. "Pa's a silly bugger, I mean honestly if anyone should freak out about this it's me. Can I put the other children down somewhere, I don't know when or how or if they will come to life and I don't want them to be crushed against their brothers and sisters, or smothered by the bag, before I can get them out."

"Stone children?" Peony demanded.

"Dwarves." Bilbo said and shrugged, he stretched and yawned. "Got a bedroom free, I'd prefer to stay with family for a few days, help me get used to caring for Junior."

"Of course, you'll need to buy a goat." The Thain said and Bilbo nodded.

"I'll get on that soon, before our supply is completely decimated." Bilbo stated and yawned, he went up to the room they saved for nursing mothers and settled the other children in the cradle, brushing each of their small faces in turn, having no idea of what to do. He had brushed over one of the little girls, before the stone cracked and he lifted the child out of it, she gurgled when she saw him and a little hand came up to brush against his cheek. "The rest of you stay where you are, Da and Pa have enough to handle, without dealing with six babies." He chided his unborn children, then felt silly for it. "Hello little flower, I'm going to call you Rosethorn, Pa can change it later if he wants, but your my Rosie for now." He said and was about to go back downstairs when Peony came up and stared at the two children in astonishment.

"Now you have two!" She said and Bilbo laughed.

"I'm going to name this one, I want to call her Rosethorn, or little Rose." Bilbo smiled and held both children gently in his arms.

"Its pretty and I don't remember the last child that was a Rosethorn. Here are some diapers and this cold box is full of bottles of goat's milk. I also brought up a baby sling." She said and Bilbo grinned.

"Thank you." He said feeding both children in turn, they were small enough to fit together in the sling and he rocked them both gently, humming as he fed them. The little boy finished the first bottle and Bilbo gave him a second, he drained a third of it before he fell asleep. Bilbo smiled as his Rose took her time with the bottle, before finishing it and he gave her the second, she drank until she too slept. He stared down at the two babies, marveling at their tiny features, their little fingers and toes, watching as they breathed in and out. Then the little boy's mouth parted and he started letting out the most adorable snuffling snores. Bilbo smiled and kissed both their foreheads. "I love you both thank you Mahuel, thank you Yavannah." He said and meant every word of it with his entire heart. He settled himself in the rocking chair with a book not wanting to let his stone children out of his sight, as he stared down at the two that had come to life. He smiled softly, before the stone cracked again and he stood, going over to the baby whose crying woke their siblings who also started crying. "Be quiet little one, you woke your siblings." Bilbo chided and fed the boy who was easily twice the size of his first born a bottle, he drank the second as well and wouldn't stop crying, as Bilbo put a diaper on him and settled him into baby clothes. He continued to cry, as Bilbo rocked with him in the rocking chair, his crying made the other children cry as well.

"Hey how about a story little man?" Bilbo asked desperate. "Have you heard the one about the old man in the moon?" Bilbo asked and started to sing. "Oh that old man in the moon, is a funny old man it is true, he has no hat, nor pipe nor glove, yet he touches everyone with his love. His light so bright that he guards the night, against those that would do us harm. Listen children and don't be alarmed, as I spin you a silk cloth of dreams and you ride upon the back of a butterfly. Listen children as I take you away from the waking day, so you can play with the old man in the moon." When the first lullaby didn't work, he started talking bits and pieces of khudzul at them. His khudzul needed work and refinement, but the words seemed to call to them and calm them, soon all three were asleep and Bilbo wasn't sure of how to move. He stood slowly and walked over to the crib, gently lying each of them down in it. He smiled as they cuddled together looking peaceful in sleep, however that was the last peaceful moment he had, as another stone cracked and the process began over again. This time it was his daughter and his two sons that looked identical to one another followed half a breath behind her. He stared at the six crying babies and felt tears come to his own eyes, he had been afraid of having one child born into this nightmare, he didn't think he could handle six. He fed one of the babies, before he was out of milk.

"Forget the one goat, Da needs a herd." Bilbo told his children, before strapping on the baby sling, putting two inside of it and staring at the other two, he couldn't leave them, but he had to get more milk. He searched around the room frantically before finding another baby sling. He turned one so it was facing his back and strung the other across his front, before holding two further babies in his arms and walking slowly down the stairs, his family stared and he burst into tears.

"It will be alright Bilbo." His Grandfather said and Bilbo nodded. "Now come and sit down, do you need more milk, can we take some of them off of you, or do you want to hold them all." Bilbo passed each of the two of his youngest to his Grandfather and Aunt Peony. He then took out the little girl and passed her to his Uncle Isenbold.

"They are beautiful they look a lot like Thorin and you."

"Can you feed them I fed the others, but I don't know how long it's been."

"Of course we can feed them, we can give you food too, King Thorin hasn't woken yet, and we moved him to the back bedroom, if you want to see him."

"Not really I mean honestly he's the one that has stone children, you'd think he'd be the rational one in all of this, I'm finding Balin, and can you watch those three and give me more milk?" He asked.

"Of course, we're used to caring for babies, we love it." Peony said and smiled down at the little girl, as they gave Bilbo a container full of milk. "These were for little Chrissie, but her parents didn't mate this cycle."

"Hopefully we can hold off for another two cycles." Bilbo said and stared down at his three children, before walking out the door. "I'm going to find Balin, he's fairly sensible, he's sure to know what to do." He said and found Balin with his cudgel in the streets, staring at Bilbo as Bilbo approached. The babies had quieted after he'd fed them a bottle each and were now sleeping again. Bilbo smiled at Balin who stared at him.

"You found your children then."

"More than found them, I believe congratulations are in order, the monarchy is assured four times over, six if you count the girls and I really could use some help, because Thorin fainted after the first one and there's only three elders this year, four counting you, can you stop being the penis patrol and help me?" Bilbo demanded and Balin stared at him.

"Of course lad, anything you need, you said there were six of them?" He demanded.

"Six beautiful little brats, I've heard nothing but crying for hours." Bilbo stated and Balin stared at him. "I'd say that they know they are royalty, but then again all babies aren't very considerate of anyone else." He joked. "Want to meet Thorin's heir?" Bilbo asked and Balin nodded, Bilbo peeled back the sling slowly showing the babies that slept inside.

"They are both beautiful, which one was born first?"

"The smaller of the two, his brother is the third born and their sister was the second, I left the fourth fifth and sixth back with my family, the children love them." Bilbo smiled and watched carefully for any dips in the road. He moved slowly back over to the elder's house and knocked on the door, his Aunt Peony letting him in again. He smiled at his Aunt, before taking out both boys and handing them to Balin, who stared down at the sleeping babies in awe, as Bilbo settled his daughter on his lap, wrapping his arms protectively around her tiny body.

"We just got them to sleep moments ago. I sent the children upstairs to play, it's a good thing that you're living with eight other people, because I doubt you and Thorin could do it on your own." Peony said and Bilbo smiled.

"Thank you." He said. "Where are they?"

"In the bassinette." Peony said and Bilbo walked over to them, gently placing his daughter inside the cradle, before making room for Balin, to put down the other two. There was little room, but they all fit inside of it.

"I'm going to take a nap, if they wake, wake me." Bilbo said and went back to the room where Thorin rested, he closed his eyes and fell asleep.

He woke several hours later to the sound of six babies crying and groaned as Thorin stirred, a frown creasing his mouth as his eyes opened. "What is that sound?" Thorin demanded.

"Our children need to be fed, would you care to meet them, Thorin?" Bilbo asked and Thorin stared at Bilbo in shock.

"How many are there."

"Six, I watched each of them be born, we're going to have trouble with two of the boys, they are identical." Bilbo said and Thorin stared at him in shock, he seemed to shake himself before standing. Together they walked into the living room.

"I see that we didn't have to wake you, Yavannah, they've got good lungs at least." Peony said over the crying and passed a baby to Bilbo, who changed Rose and fed her.

"This is your daughter Rosethorn, haven't gotten round to naming the others yet." He said. "Wanted to wait for you." He added.

"Which was the first born?"

"Balin is holding him, the little boy over there was the third born, the other little girl the fourth and those two came at nearly the exact same time." He said and Thorin sat down in a chair, Bilbo put a sling around the shocked dwarf and settled their daughter into it, before handing Thorin a bottle, which he fed her, staring down at her in astonishment.

"I don't understand to be stone blessed once is considered a great blessing, why would we be blessed six times and have they be awoken all at once."

"I don't know, but I'm leaving with the oldest three to go back to Erebor, I won't risk losing them all." Bilbo said and Thorin frowned.

"We only just left."

"I know, but plans change and I won't put all our children at risk, I can't." Bilbo stated. "I'll be going back with the caravan taking the women and children."

"Take them all with you then and Bofur is good with babies, take him too." Thorin said and Bilbo nodded.

"Should Kili come back with me as well?"

"Kili is old enough to handle himself, your right, I don't want them anywhere near the Shire." Thorin stated and Bilbo nodded. "The caravan is due to arrive soon, you will be on it." He promised and Bilbo nodded, he watched his children and his family interact with each other.

"Don't die on me you impossible dwarf." Bilbo said.

"I'll try not to." Thorin said and Bilbo smiled, before turning to Peony.

"Where did you buy your goat, I think I'll need at least five for the babies."

"Five?"

"In case some get eaten I'll still have the others." Bilbo replied and was given the address of a person that bred livestock for sale. Bilbo left the chits and took the five goats back to his house with Thorin and Balin. He stared at his children and smiled softly, as he milked the goats and filled the bottles his relatives had given him. He finished filling them, before going back inside to where Thorin waited with the babies. He handed two of the bottles to Thorin, took a sling from Balin and handed him two bottles as well. He fed the babies and burped them, before putting them back into their sling. They fell asleep quickly, after he went to the back garden with them and he smiled at their sleeping faces. He yawned and closed his eyes resting for a moment against his bench.

The next four days passed in much the same manner, with the exception of two dwarrowdam and three elven ladies showing up in the middle of town looking lost and confused, one of them was the elven woman that he'd seen with Kili. Bilbo told them what had happened and asked if they perhaps remembered who their partners were. They had been livid and ranted and raved at Bilbo, who was very glad that he left his babies back at the house. He had apologized and told them that they were welcome to accompany the other women and children back to Erebor and they had agreed that it was perhaps best if they did so.

The mating rite finally passed and Bilbo went over to where the armies were stationed when it did, he explained what had happened and although they were all livid, the dwarves at least didn't yell at Bilbo, as Bilbo had brought along the two oldest of his children as bit of a shield. He explained that he was leaving with the caravan that was going back to Erebor, he couldn't leave his children in what would soon be a war zone and Thorin had agreed that it was best that he go with the caravan, to protect the children. Everyone had yelled at him then, waking the babies and making them cry.

Bilbo bounced his children slowly up and down, up and down, as each part of the army had quieted in turn. Bilbo had taken out the baby boy and shown them him then, showed them Thorin's heir, though Bilbo thought that if Thorin died in battle Fili should serve as king, but he didn't want to get into matters with the dwarves and the thought of Thorin dying in battle was horrible to contemplate.

The caravan arrived the next day and Bilbo helped them to load supplies for both Mirkwood and Erebor, the hobbits had gathered together canned goods from last year's run and one of the wagons they filled with their own supplies, before grudgingly giving the other supplies to the dwarves. Bilbo was surprised to find Fili and Kili's mother leading the caravan and she had been delighted that she was now an aunt six times over. Bilbo had been glad of the help, as most of the women had their own babies to attend to and tending to three infants was slightly less overwhelming then tending to the entire six. He had moved into Dis' wagon with the babies and had tethered the goat pen behind them for the journey. He had thought that the journey had been long before, but with crying babies and children, terrified hobbits and ten pregnant women of varying races, it felt like it would never end.

Finally they came to Erebor, Bilbo had told the elf the truth of what had happened and what he suspected. The elf hadn't actually been that surprised, she was a nice lass and admitted to Bilbo that Kili and her had both been trying to deny the connection and pull they felt towards one another without rejecting it for over a year. Her name was Tariel and she was a warrior, she was as good with a bow as any elf and she knew it. Tariel had taken to helping both Bilbo and Dis with the babies, though they both decided that it would be better to see if the little one was part dwarven before saying anything to anyone.

They finally reached Erebor, just in time for the fall harvest. The dwarves had known they were coming, but they still stared as Bilbo left the tent with his now two month old children. "So you truly did have six children?" Fili asked and Bilbo nodded and Fili grinned. "What are their names?" He asked

"This is Thain, first of his name, heir apparent to Erebor, I'm also holding his sister Rosethorn, then there is Durin the Seventh, though I still don't understand what the deal is with the mark and every time Dis explains it to me, I get more confused. Then there is Bluebell and the twins Frerin Feiorin, right now we're calling the Fre and Fi." Bilbo said and smiled at the astonished dwarf.

"I don't understand, why wasn't Durin the seventh first born?" Fili demanded.

"I don't know, he's twice as loud as his siblings though and I think he'll make a good smith like his father, or perhaps a warrior." Bilbo said and smiled down at his little boy and girl, He spent time with all his children, but he felt guilty about having a connection to Rosethorn, that he didn't have with the others. He suspected that one day she'd be the most like him. She took after him the most in looks and perhaps she would take after them in her interests, regardless he'd already decided that the babies would be learning how to cook and plant once they came to be old enough.

"That fits with who he was in previous lives, can I see him and your other children?" Fili asked and Bilbo nodded. He slowly showed Fili each of the babies in turn, careful not to wake them, but Durin woke and started crying, waking his siblings as well. Bilbo handed the sling to Fili who looked out of his depth as he took Durin from Dis. Sometimes if he held him and rocked him, he'd get him to settle, but no one else could.

Durin wailed as Bilbo rocked him. "There now my little Bolder it's alright, Da's here Da won't let anything happen to you, he promises." Bilbo told Durin. "Ada will be back in spring, maybe he'll make you a nice rattle then, just don't hit your siblings over the head with it, alright?" Bilbo asked the baby, who was much too intelligent for one so young. "Do you want to sit in the rocking chair, or see cousin Fili?" He asked and the baby continued to cry. "Are you hungry?" Bilbo asked and the crying stopped for a moment, before starting up again. "You're a hungry little lad aren't you." He asked and was given a bottle, he bounced Durin up and down, as he fed him. "How about a song then, or did you just want your Da. Sorry Da can't always hold you, but Da loves your brothers and sisters just as much as he loves you and needs to spend time with them, too, yes he does." He said and smiled as the baby finished the bottle, he gave him another two bottles before Durin yawned as Bilbo burped him and fell back to sleep. "He won't settle unless I have him and I swear he can sleep through anything." Bilbo said. "I wish that his siblings could sleep half as well as he does. It takes forever to get them all settled again." He added, before slipping Durin into the baby sling Dis handed him, as she fed Frerin and Feiorin.

"So is Frerin my Uncle?"

"He has the same mark my brother did, but Feiorin has no markings, neither do the other four." Dis said and Fili nodded. Dwarven marks weren't like birthmarks, they showed up after the child was two weeks old and told if they had lived before, or not. Bilbo thought it was a bit of a strange thing, to rest so much in the hands of infants, but he couldn't judge what he didn't understand. It was true that both Frerin and Durin seemed older than their siblings somehow, though only time would tell what they remembered of their past lives. Bilbo had started praying to Mahuel, pleading with him not to give his children memories of battles, or war before they were ready for them. He did it in silence however, as he doubted the other dwarves would much appreciate his prayers.

"I'm going to go to where we planted the farm." Bilbo said, taking back the baby sling, as the others quieted after they were fed and changed. He settled that one across his back, before going over to where the farm was. He smiled at the sight of it the dwarves came over to him.

"We followed your instructions, did we do alright, and will it be enough?" One asked.

"With the supplies we brought from the Shire and the supplies from Lake Town, it should be." Bilbo replied and looked around him. "You made the blackberry preserves right?"

"And canned the things that were ready in midsummer, Alris helped us, as she's had some experience in canning."

"That's great, how's the orchard coming along?" Bilbo asked walking with the dwarf that was speaking to him.

"I can show you." The dwarf said and Bilbo smiled as he was lead to the section of the garden containing the baby trees. "Will they last through winter?"

"These are the heartiest apple trees I could I could find, they should be alright." Bilbo replied and went back to stand in the middle of the garden. "The wheat needs to be harvested and we should take it to the mill in Lake Town, to be ground into flour, looks like the hay grew well, that should feed the livestock through winter. The Broccoli and Cauliflower needs to be harvested soon, as should the beans, beats and basil, can one of you take me to where the cans are being stored, I want to be sure you did it properly. If you can improperly you might as well not eat what you can, because it makes you sicker than if you hadn't eaten it at all." Bilbo said and walked with another dwarf to the larder. He took out one of each of the cans and tried it, smelling it and tasting it, before putting the lids back on. "These were well canned, who did the canning?" He asked and smiled at a dwarrowdam who was waiting nervously. "You did well, take the cans I opened as a reward, I'm glad that I had your help while I was away." He said and the dwarrowdam curtsied.

"Begging your pardon mi lord, but could I see the babies, I love babies." She said and Bilbo smiled softly.

"If they wake up, I don't see why not, but right now they are asleep." Bilbo said and she nodded. "I'll be back tomorrow to help with the harvest and canning of what is harvested." Bilbo said and the woman nodded. Bilbo strode from the storage area and to the market. His babies had gotten on fine with Shire clothing and the little fur waddling clothes he had made for them, but now that they were in their permanent home, Bilbo could get them more. Thorin had given him the money had brought with him to the Shire and Bilbo had shown Thorin where the chits were and the system they used, explaining how much each was worth and taking out the chits for wine and cider and sorting through the appropriate amount.

Bilbo smiled at thinking of Thorin, he missed the dwarf and he wondered if perhaps he'd come to love him, just as much as Thorin loved Bilbo. He walked through the market, looking for warm baby clothes for the winter and bought them three to four sizes too big, the smallest would be swimming in their clothing, but he needed to buy for Durin and not for Rosethorn who was the smallest. He bought the clothing and next he went to a man selling cribs and asked him if it was possible to make one custom. He told the man his order and the man looked shocked, even more shocked that Bilbo had four babies on him and another two with Dis back at the royal quarters. He sat Bilbo down and planned out the details of the crib with him, they ultimately decided on making three cribs, as one would be too big after the babies outgrew it and would not be used again. Bilbo then ordered six mattresses for the beds the children would need and gave the man a rough estimate of a year and a half to complete them. Bilbo wanted good sized removable wooden rails fitted to the existing beds, once the children outgrew their cribs. He asked the man if he could get the cribs and their mattresses done soon and the man gave a rough estimate of three weeks.

He then bought furs, blankets and blue fur lined cloaks for him and the children. Once Thorin came back from war, he would marry Bilbo legitimizing their children and Dis had promised that everyone would know the babies were Thorin's if he did not come back.

Bilbo finished buying the more obvious things, before wandering through the toy stalls. He found a man selling the most elaborate rag dolls Bilbo had ever seen. Bilbo had bought six on the spot, four warrior dolls and two dolls that looked like dwarven ladies. He asked the doll maker to put their clothes in a separate box and paid him. He also bought baby blankets for all his children, he doubted that even with winter he'd be able to make six baby blankets, he'd only done two in the time it took to reach Erebor. He paid for the blankets and someone offered to push a cart for him, for a silver penny which Bilbo gladly gave the dwarf, as he bought supplies for the babies, he'd make up their rooms later, for now he would just get what they needed. He found some soft wool rattles and added them to the cart, before buying up warm one piece suits in sizes that ran from the size that they were now, to ones that were for babies over a year. He smiled as he walked back to Erebor, the man he had paid carrying his belongings back to his rooms. "Thank you." Bilbo told the man.

"Just doing my job, it was an honor to be of service to you though, can I see your babies?" He asked and Bilbo smiled softly.

"I'll show them to everyone at the appropriate time." Bilbo said and the dwarf nodded, Bilbo then gently lifted Durin out of the sling, glad that he was such a heavy sleeper and changed him into warmer clothes. "Durin sleeps like a rock, that's why I call him my little boulder." Bilbo told the dwarf.

"Durin?" The dwarf asked shocked. "You call Durin the Deathless your little boulder?" He demanded

"Whoever he may have been, he's a baby now and he eats craps and sleeps just like his brothers. I don't see the point in treating him like he's far beyond his years, though I think he understands more than his siblings." Bilbo said and smiled at the shocked cart pusher. "Thank you for pushing my things, but now I want to have a bit of a rest, could you leave?" Bilbo asked nicely and the cart pusher nodded. He left the things Bilbo had bought in Bilbo's room and went back down to the lower levels. Bilbo smiled softly, as he changed Durin, the little boy never woke.

He then went on to change Thain, who screamed as his skin touched the cold air, waking the other three. Bilbo changed the thrashing baby into warmer clothing as well as his sister, knowing what an ordeal it would be to change their nappies after they were all bundled up. He tried to set them back in the sling, but found that they didn't fit when swaddled. He put two in the slings and the other two in his arms, as Dis came into the room and stared at Bilbo, as the others woke. Bilbo set the two in his arms down in the middle of the bed, before taking the other two from Dis and changing them into warmer clothing as well. Dis smiled when she saw what Bilbo had bought.

"Its a good start, we can go shopping together tomorrow, I ordered the six rooms closest to Thorin's and yours to be aired out, some of those rooms haven't been used for centuries before even the dragon came." She said and smiled. "We'll have to look through them eventually." She added and Bilbo nodded, changing into the warmer cloak he'd gotten for himself that was dark blue. His relatives had made silk carry bags for him and someone had brought up his things out of the wagon. He put one of the silk bags on his front, adjusting it for Rosethorn, before taking the other out and adjusting it for Thain. He then put Durin into the cradle, making sure that he hung below his siblings and settled him around Bilbo's back, He then did the same for Bluebell. "Is it alright if you look after Frerin today and tonight, I'll give you the girls tomorrow."

"That will be fine, we can also hire a wet nurse." Dis said and Bilbo frowned.

"Do you know anyone that is a wet nurse? I don't want to trust a complete stranger with my babies." Bilbo said and Dis nodded.

"As is only proper, did you get to know the dwarrowdam who traveled with us to Erebor?"

"I did, but they have their own babies to tend to, I'd like to find someone who has babies who are passed needing milk." Bilbo said. "That way they can more of focus their attention on my children, though I wouldn't mind if they brought theirs as well. My family and friends will be a bit busy getting settled where they are, to help me with the babies for the next few weeks at least and they have young children of their own to care for." Bilbo said and rocked his body back and forth, back and forth, as Dis took the other two and sat in an old rocking chair, until they fell asleep again. "I'd like to have them together as much as possible, but no one could care for all six at once, I really appreciate your help." Bilbo added and Dis smiled.

"It has been no trouble, they are a joy to care for." Dis said and Bilbo nodded, he then stood and looked through the rooms that had been aired out. Most of what was in them was completely unsuitable for children, he called over several servants and had them remove the weapons from the walls of the rooms, as well as anything he considered to be unsuitable for children's rooms. He then took down the tapestries depicting great battles and asked if there were any tapestries of forest life, or flowers. Someone found some in the other chambers and Bilbo put the prettiest in what would be his daughter's rooms. He put the ones depicting animals in his son's rooms, before stopping for dinner. He ate in the middle hall that night, as dwarves stared at him, as he asked for a chair to be brought to the high table. The middle hall was full of warriors, merchants and the crafting guilds. They stared at him, as he ate the soup the kitchens had prepared, coming back for a third and fourth bowl. He pulled out the goat's milk when the babies started crying and fed them, but he realized he couldn't reach Durin on his back.

"Could someone help me with Durin, I can't feed him like this." Bilbo asked and spotted a guard. "I recognize you, you work in the royal quarters don't you."

"Yes your lordship, what do you want of me."

"Could you help me with my son?"

"I've never had my own children, before, Mahuel hasn't yet blessed me with a lass, why don't you ask one of the lasses instead?" He asked and Bilbo nodded, a woman volunteered and helped unhook Durin from Bilbo's back. She stared at the baby.

"He looks a lot like Thorin." She said and Bilbo smiled.

"Thain takes after me, as does Rosethorn, the others take more after their father." Bilbo said and smiled at the woman. He watched as she fed him, bouncing the baby and looked where she was sitting. "Are you still nursing?" Bilbo asked and the woman looked surprised.

"I was about to wean my youngest." She said. "I haven't been as blessed as you and only have the three."

"Could you consider working for me in the royal quarters, I need help and Dis has been kind to offer her assistance, but she suggested that I get a wet nurse as well. That's not how its done in the Shire, but I can't take care of all of them by myself and I don't want to rely upon Dis until they are old enough to feed themselves."

"Of course I can, it would be an honor, but surely someone from the high court would be better."

"I want to have friends from all the courts and have my children watched over by them." Bilbo stated and silence fell in the room. "I know its not traditional to your way of thinking, but Thain needs to grow up to be a good ruler and for a hobbit that means knowing his people, working alongside them, learning something of their trade."

"So you learned different hobbit trades."

"Some more than others, I'm horrible at spinning, everyone in my family says so. Still I know how to milk an animal, mend and sew clothing, grow crops and can them. I also know how to bake and cook, I cleaned my own floors until I came to Erebor, though I had another woman come over twice a week to ensure the place remained to the standard I was accustomed. I tried to brew ale and realized that it was best left to the brewers, they stopped me from ruining the barrel. I also tried woodcarving and I enjoy it, but I'm passionate about cooking, gardening and reading." Bilbo shrugged his shoulders. "I want my children to discover what their talents are and what they are bad at, to learn to appreciate everyone and everything. To grow up knowing that they are blessed and learn to look out for those who aren't so lucky. I want Thain to grow to be a good King and I want the others to be able to advise him."

"Thain is that the oldest?"

"He's my firstborn yes, then there's Rosethorn, then Durin the Seventh of his name, then Bluebell, then Frerin and Feiorin who are identical and with their Aunt at the moment." Bilbo said and smiled softly, as he fed Rosethorn. He took Durin out of his sling first and realized that he'd forgotten to get mittens, before taking Bluebell out as well. Bluebell had soiled her diaper, so Bilbo put Durin back in and changed her on the bench, glad that it hadn't gotten through to the under layers. He put the dirty diaper in his bag, before dressing her again quickly and holding her in the crook of his arms, he fed her and burped her, putting her back in the sling, before taking out Durin and doing the same with him. He then stood and rocked back and forth, trying to get them to settle. "Can someone sing them a song, they like khudzul, but I don't know it and Dis usually sings to them, when they get like this."

"How about the fire song, I like that one!" A little boy said and Bilbo smiled.

"Why don't you start it off?" Bilbo asked and the child beamed.

"Really Mi Lord."

"Yes really, only quickly if you please, I swear the crying would wake their ancestors in the crypts." Bilbo said and several people laughed.

"The first verse is the best, the others are scary." The little boy said and started to sing.

"Oh, misty eye of the mountain below
Keep careful watch of my brothers' souls
And should the sky be filled with fire and smoke
Keep watching over Durin's sons."

"I want the gem song next." A little girl said and Bilbo nodded, he smiled, he loved the sound of dwarven singing, the deep chanting nature the words took on. He was surprised at how much of the boy's song he'd understood.

"The dwarves of yore made mighty spells,
While hammers fell like ringing bells
In places deep, where dark things sleep,
In hollow halls beneath the fells.

For ancient king and elvish lord
There many a gleaming golden hoard
They shaped and wrought, and light they caught
To hide in gems on hilt of sword.

On silver necklaces they strung
The flowering stars, on crowns they hung
The dragon-fire, in twisted wire
They meshed the light of moon and sun." The little girl finished singing and she frowned. "Mama calls it the Misty mountain song, but she won't finish it for me." The child said and Bilbo laughed.

"Because the rest isn't really suitable for children, she'll sing you the rest of it when you are older."

"Did you understand it?" The little girl asked. "I could tell you were humming along."

"No one has taught me Khudzul, so how could I understand it?" Bilbo asked and everyone stared at him. "Though honestly for a secret language you lot are rather obvious, some more than others." He said and did a gesture in iglishmêk that thanked the girl for her song, he smiled at his babies who were now all fast asleep. The dwarrowdam helped him put Thain back into the back sack and he tightened down the straps, before going back to his meal. Everyone stared at him as he ate.

"How much khudzul do you know."

"Less than what a child of six might know and more, unfortunately the ruder the language the easier it is to understand. Can you kindly not mention bedroom activities between me and Thorin in my presence, of the size of well my endowments, it gets tiring after a time. As does talking of the fertility of hobbits and the crazy rituals we perform in the Shire. The rite of Yavannah is sacred to our people and should not be dismissed as four day breeding ritual where everyone goes insane." Bilbo stated and everyone stared at him.

"So that does happen, its hard to believe." The woman said and Bilbo nodded.

"It does happen, you need to be prepared, because it takes weeks to recover from, you don't eat, or sleep for four days, all you do is have erm relations." Bilbo said and felt himself blush and took a big gulp of ale to mask it, the ale was good enough, not as good as what was served at the high table, but passable, it seemed to have more of a kick to it, then what Bilbo had had at lunch and dinner at the high table and it was much more bitter. He finished off the mug and wiped his lips with the back of his hands. "I don't talk about how crazy it is, that my children hatched like birds from stone, because you can sure bet I think that's crazy." Bilbo stated and everyone laughed.

"Very few people are so fortunate, does it truly effect all adults?" A dwarrow asked and raised an eyebrow.

"You've heard about the elf that is staying with us right? She's pregnant with a dwarven child, it doesn't give you a choice, unless you've committed to someone."

"How do you commit?"

"Its what you feel in your soul, we believe that the ritual brings out what is in our innermost hearts. Everyone thought it strange that it didn't affect me last winter, as it should have. Now I know that's because I was meant for Thorin." Bilbo drank some more ale. "However it doesn't give you much of a choice in who Yavannah believes is the partner of your heart."

"So its a fertility ritual that Aule's wife gives the hobbits?" Someone asked and Bilbo shrugged.

"Yavannah is the Valar we worship, she's as important to us as Aule is to you. She's the bringer of crops, the maker of life, some even consider her to be the mother of us all, just like you consider Mahuel to be your father. Disrespecting our rite disrespects her and can you really afford to disrespect the Valar of fertility and growing things?" Bilbo demanded and the dwarves looked shocked. "We even have beliefs surrounding the season in which you were conceived. My mother swore I was a midwinter child and as I came into this world, seven months after midwinter, most agreed that I had been conceived during the midwinter rights. Midwinter children are thought to be serious, dedicated and strong willed. Beltane children are considered to be joyful, playful and happy, midsummer children are thought to be wise, strong and brave. Then there are the children of the harvest who are determined, cleaver and kind. Some often think that's an old wives tale, because children that are born during the rites sometimes don't show any of those qualities, but you need to understand how important this is to my people. Its not something to joke about, its the time at which we're most likely to become pregnant, though children can be conceived outside of the rites, most are conceived during them." Everyone stared at Bilbo who drained the second cup. "This ale is different than the kind they serve at the high table, its very good but different."

"Its stronger than that pisswater the high court drinks." Someone called out and Bilbo laughed.

"So it goes to follow that they serve potato ale in the lower courts?" Bilbo joked and several people laughed.

"I don't know what they serve in the lower courts." Someone said and Bilbo shrugged.

"Food is food and ale is ale, wherever it is." He said and smiled at everyone, before turning to his neighbor. "So what is it that you do?" Bilbo asked.

"I am a master jeweler, mi lord."

"Call me Bilbo and if you must call me Lord, call me Lord Bilbo, but I don't like being called Mi Lord, I know its part of your customs, but its not part of mine." Bilbo stated.

"Alright then Bilbo, my days are spent finding the finest jewels and determining who among the people I'm assigned to gets to work with what."

"I see and who else is a master jeweler." Bilbo asked and five other people nodded at him from across the table. "So do you specialize in certain things?"

"Actually we do, I am the jeweler of rings and hair beads, he's the jeweler of necklaces, he's the jeweler of blades, and he's the jeweler of wrists and finally she's the jeweler of ankles."

"So there's an order even to this, what about if one of the councilors die? How do you determine who takes his place?"

"The master jeweler sits on the council for all of us, once he dies, I will take his place and the others will move up to take over from each other, we vote on the jeweler of ankles as well." He said and Bilbo nodded.

"And you sir, what's the order to the warrior's guild."

"I'm a smith not a warrior, he's the warrior." The smith said and laughed. "We do look similar and smiths are often also warriors and vice versa." He said and Bilbo nodded. "Do you still wish to know about my guild?"

"I do, I should get a tutor, because I know next to nothing about dwarves." Bilbo admitted and poured himself some milk.

"Thorin hasn't explained it to you?"

"We've been a bit busy and when does Thorin have the time, he has a kingdom to run, he can't be in thirty places at once, though sometimes I swear he tries to." Bilbo said and everyone stared at him. "He's a king, but he's also a dwarf and he takes more on than I've ever seen my Grandfather do. I don't expect him to hold my hand as I try to understand the place I'll be living in, but I don't want my children to know more about their people than I do." Bilbo said. "I'm looking to establish my own court of friends, preferably those that have babies about my son and daughter's age."

"Have you asked the royals about this court you seek to establish?" The Master of Rings demanded.

"Well they might be the Princes and Princesses of Erebor, but they are my children too, I won't be seeking permission in how to raise my children. Thorin is too busy running a kingdom and I'll need help with them, but I'm going to be their primary caregiver, I want them to grow up knowing things dwarves need to know and fauntlings learn from their parents and village as well."

"Village?" The Master of Rings asked.

"In the Shire its believed that the village is responsible in helping care for the child, our system of governance and the way we approach everything is very different." Bilbo stated. "We have no high, middle or low court, what we do have is what you would call the royal family. My Grandfather is the leader of my people and the court is composed of my family and other hobbits that are voted into the court. They are from every walk of life and every manner of means and that allows for a balance between those in power and those without. I'm not asking anyone to change the way your government is run, but I will be asking you to take on an apprentice or two in the next several years."

"You want to apprentice out your children to different guilds."

"Yes those that they have the most aptitude in when it comes time, I had nothing to do but to think and worry on the road here and I think this is what will be best for them and for the people they serve." Everyone stared at him in shock. "For me and my family, we don't consider it a Valar given right to rule, we consider it a service that we perform. That's why the traditional greeting in the Shire is at your service." Bilbo said. "I'm Bilbo Baggins, at your service and the common reply is at yours and your families." The hall was completely shocked. "We're a simple people, but we're not the simpletons everyone believes us to be, we decided long ago that we would focus on farming and peaceful ways, rather than war and bloodshed. Now we don't have a choice any longer and the way of life in the Shire is changing, I doubt its for the better, but we had to change to survive." Bilbo stated and everyone stared at him with awe. "I'm not trying to change anything, I'm simply attempting to ensure that my children grow up to be, the best they can be. That they know that they are loved and they love and respect others in return. That they know that they are privileged and some aren't as fortunate. That they know right from wrong and actions have consequences that they know they are talented and can take on anything. I want what any father wants for their children, I want them to be good men and women, though I may never see them grown."

"What do you mean?" The Master of Rings questioned.

"The lifespan of my people isn't the lifespan of yours, we have less than half your years. My children might grow faster than you are used to and might die younger than you'd like." Bilbo stated and they stared shocked at him. "I'm the same age as Fili more or less."

"But that can't be, you sound like a man grown."

"Because I was raised differently and I've always been wise beyond my years, or that's what some people say anyway." He said and shrugged. "Everyone is different, everyone is better at some things and worse at others, Fili has different skills than I do, that's why if something happens to Thorin and me, I want him to be regent until Thain is of age, Thorin agreed with me that it would be best, because a child can't be expected to rule and I refuse to have my boy be a figurehead. He should be allowed a childhood, though I have many years that I plan to live yet."

"What if King Thorin dies, will you take his place at court, will you take the consorts seat?" The Ring Master demanded.

"Not until I can serve properly." Bilbo said. "I need to be able to know some things, before I can do that. I will be Thorin's consort in name only, until I feel ready to take my place on the council." Bilbo said and everyone stared at him. "Thorin doesn't know this, because I decided it on my journey here, I haven't told anyone but you about my decision." He said and they stared at him. "I know next to nothing of your ways, I'm a hobbit not a dwarf and I need to learn to serve you as you deserve to be served."

"You've already seen to it that we'll make it through winter, what more can you do?" The Ring Master demanded.

"I need to know the people I'm serving." Bilbo stated and it was clear that they got it then, they stared at Bilbo a moment, before someone started clapping and soon the whole hall was clapping and cheering, Bilbo raised a hand and they quieted. "I can only learn the basics and I have babies who need me, that being said would the three of you decide someone to give me lessons."

"I can help mind your children, while your learning crafting, warrior arts and smithing." The woman offered and Bilbo grinned.

"That would be wonderful thank you." Bilbo said and smiled at her. "I'm going to have a very busy winter." He added and finished eating, before he stood slowly and walked back up to his rooms. He settled the children in bed next to him for the night, closed his eyes and fell asleep.