Authors Note: Thank you all so very much, you're all so amazing! Thank you for all your reviews you've given me the determination to keep writing this story. I am really excited to keep this story alive, please if you may, tell me what you think of this story so far it will mean the world to me and it will show me how you're feeling about everything that's going on. Thank you so much for all your support and I will try my hardest to write this story as best as I can. I hope that I will do it justice and make you all proud.

Rory rolled over, bumping into Jess who was still sound asleep. She groaned, if Jess was still sleeping it probably meant it was too early to be awake. She turned the other way to face the alarm clock beside her side of the bed 3:15 it read, she groaned a little louder up against her pillow. She knew she probably wouldn't be able to get herself back to sleep but she was willing to try, she closed her eyes and tried her hardest, she thought about fluffy slippers and warm cocoa but it was no use. She laid there awake for half an hour trying to drift off but she couldn't get there.

She rolled over and grabbed the box of letters from under the bed. She unlocked it and took out the next letter, using her phone she started reading it in the dark. She felt almost dangerous reading this while Jess was in the room.

Rory,

Jimmy kicked me out, I don't know where I am going or where I will end up but I know it's not going to be much better than this. I screwed up okay, I left a family who wanted me for another one that didn't. Jimmy has moved on with his new kid and new woman. It's stupid that I even bothered coming here. I could have had a nice thing going on back at my Uncle's. He offered to let me stay and redo my senior year but pride got in the way, there was no way I was going to redo that year of my life. I hate school Rory, I should have done it right the first time. I'm probably going to try and make my way back to New York, or Philly depends how far this money can take me. I'm thinking of selling my car. It won't get me much but anything is better than what I've got now. I feel like such a screw up even writing this to you but I have to get this off my chest, I have to tell someone. Even if I don't send this to you like all the other letters I have stashed in my rucksack, at least I said it somewhere. Hopefully the next time we speak, or rather the next time I write I'll be at my destination. I love you Rory.

Jess

Rory looked at the date on that letter and tried to remember where she had been, she couldn't decide between Paris or Denmark it was one of the two if it wasn't the middle of the night she probably would have called her mom and asked her to recall the exact location, no matter how crazy it would sound her mother would have tried her hardest to remember just because she asked.

Jess wasn't a light sleeper, he rolled around quite frequently and she had never minded, it was fascinating to her now watching him, his bare back wasn't under the covers, she placed a gentle kiss against his shoulder blades and smiled, dropping the letter down beside her bed and crawling up against her man, she closed her eyes and snuggled in against his warmth.

She didn't open her eyes until her ears were complaining about the noise coming from the alarm clock, Jess' lips were brushing against her neck indicating that this time he was awake. "Sorry babe." He whispered, untangling himself from her limbs, Rory felt the bed dip as he left the bed to switch off the alarm, she groaned wishing she was still asleep, leaving her eyes closed. She could hear the humming of the pipes as Jess started his shower, but that's all she can remember from the morning because it was those very pipes that sent her off to sleep.

Jess had left her a note in the kitchen, a packet of poptarts lay open on the kitchen bench, she smiled running her fingers over the post it note that read "Eat me!" Jess was always doing things like this for her, leaving her things to wake up to. It was nice, and she loved him for it.

Once her poptart's were cooked, and by the plural I mean yes, she had toasted each and every one of them, Rory sat herself down on the sofa with her laptop on hand, she scrolled through her book, reading the most recent pages to give her an idea of where to carry on.

Jess was walking into Dr Bishop's office, she noticed his facial expression, he was visibly concerned about something she could see it plainly on his face. He took a seat and waited for her to start his appointment. He sat there without saying a word, just waiting for her. She hadn't seen him like this since their first session.

"Is there something on your mind?" She asked, wondering if he had any specific things he needed to talk through. She liked to give people that option, there was no point in talking about things that weren't relevant.

"Just Rory." He shrugged trying to avoid the topic. Dr Bishop wasn't the type to pass up an opportunity to discuss things that could help a patient.

"You look bothered by something." She prompted, wanting him to open up.

"I found something this morning." He shook his head still not believing whatever it was that he was stressing over.

"Did you talk to her about it?"

He shook his head, "When I left her, when I was 17. I used to write her letters. I never sent them to her, but I accumulated a whole heap of them. I'd forgotten all about them but somehow she has them and I found them opened under her side of the bed like she's been reading them."

"Did you not want her to read them?" She asked him, trying to gain a better understanding. Jess wasn't the type of person who was upset over things for no reason. She had noticed this about him ever since he started opening up to her.

"It's not that I didn't want her to read them. I wrote them for the intention of her to read them it's just, she's doing it in secret. She's hiding it from me."

She nodded, "You should talk to her, mention the letters tell her how you feel about her reading them."

"How I feel? I feel like she doesn't trust me enough to tell me that she has the letters. I can't even remember her knowing about them. She probably found them when I moved out of my old place, otherwise I've got nothing. I have no idea how this happened." He groaned, hiding his face into his hands. He hated feeling this way, especially when it came to Rory. He wanted their relationship to be open and honest, he wanted to feel nothing but happiness and pride when it came to his girlfriend. He didn't want his mind to associate Rory with distrust. He wanted Rory to be everything good in his life, he had plenty of room for distrust when it came to his relationship with his mother, who hadn't responded to his letter even though he sent it almost a week ago. She hadn't even called to tell him she received it. Luke didn't even mention it, and if Luke didn't know about it then it must have been something she was ashamed of.

"Tell her this Jess, it's the only way you can keep an honest relationship with her. If you want her to know what you're feeling then no matter how afraid or ashamed you think you'll feel from being honest, it shouldn't matter because if you respect her and you want her to know that, then being honest is the only way you can truly show her and allow her to trust you that same way.

Jess thought about it and he knew she was right, he knew the only way he could keep this relationship the way they had been keeping it so far, he had to be honest with her even when it killed him. He wanted her to confide in him, so he had to do the same, it was the only way this would all work.

During the cab ride home, Jess was rehearsing how he would bring it up. He knew he couldn't raise his temper of come across as angry. He wasn't angry, he sometimes sounded that way but it was hardly ever the case. He didn't like the way he always ended up raising his voice. He hated it, he just didn't know how to control it. It was the only way he knew how to get his mother's attention back when he was a kid and the habit just kind of stuck with him over the years.

He kissed his girl when she answered the front door, he had left his key in the kitchen when he left that morning. "I forgot my key." He explained, walking into the apartment. "You been working?" He asked, noticing her laptop sitting on the sofa. Rory shrugged, "Been trying." She responded, looking a little distracted.

"Do you want to talk about it? We should talk." He took her over to the sofa, laid her laptop onto the floor gently and grabbed hold of her hand. They sat there for a moment, both too scared to speak. "So," Rory started off, but she didn't say anything further.

"So," Jess repeated, staring at the television which was turned off.

"I was just looking at the news on my laptop." Rory started, turning towards him. "Logan's name came up. I know that shouldn't mean anything but it happened. I saw it, and I read it. I don't want to make a deal out of it but I thought you should know."

"That you read it?"

"That I read it." She nodded, instantly feeling bad.

"It's okay Rory; you can read whatever you want. Even if ex boyfriends are involved." He told her. He meant it too; he didn't want her feeling like she had to feel guilty for knowing that Logan was successful. He didn't want to be that kind of boyfriend. He stroked her hand gently, trying to make her feel at ease.

"Are you sure? Because I feel like if the shoe was on the other foot I would be uneasy if you were looking up your old girlfriends."

Jess laughed, she was jealous of them? She had no reason to be! "Rory, those relationships were nothing serious, I have no interest in looking any of them up, ever."

"Not even Shane?" She joked, Jess shook his head, still laughing. "If I recall correctly, you were incredibly jealous of her."

Rory pouted, "I was not incredibly jealous." She tried to hide her blushing cheeks.

"Correct me here but I remember you getting into some kind of cat fight with her at some point?" He teased, poking her in the ribs gently, causing her to scream.

"No!" She screamed, "It wasn't a cat fight, just carefully chosen words strung together in a fit of frustration." She defended.

"I love you, even when you're jealous." He told her, kissing the tip of her nose. She smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck, "I don't have to be jealous, I know that you really love me, and I really love you, so neither of us has anything to worry about."

"Because we trust each other right?" He asked, becoming a little quiet, he knew he could potentially ruin the moment but he had to try and get this off of his chest. The one relationship that he wanted to keep, the one person he needed in his life was right there in front of him and he was scared?

"Yeah, we trust each other." Rory nodded in agreement.

Jess pulled a letter out from his pocket, it was the one he had found earlier. He handed it over to Rory and sighed, "If you wanted to read them. I would have given them to you."

Rory's face dropped, she knew he was right. She felt ashamed, the truth was she didn't know how he would react, she thought that if she asked him he would have thrown them out himself, unable to know for certain without asking him she had felt it was easier to just read them in secret.

"I know, I was scared that you wouldn't want me to." She admitted, nibbling her lower lip.

"You can read them, if you promise me two things." He bargained.

Rory thought about making a joke, reminding him that she was the one with the letters locked in a box, but she didn't feel like this was the right moment. She nodded, "What's your price?" She asked, reaching for his hand again. Jess smiled, squeezing her hand.

"Condition one, you don't read them in front of me, or mention them or tease me about any of their contents." He told her.

"And two?" She asked curiously, she was relieved that he was allowing her to keep reading. It was the only thing that had given her closure, that had given her an invite into the mind of seventeen year old Jess Mariano, the boy she had fallen in love with.

"Promise me to be honest with me no matter what. Even when it seems silly or embarrassing, I want to be there for you, I want to know everything about you. I love you Rory, and there is nothing you can keep from me."

Rory didn't say anything, she leaned over and attached her lips to his, kissing him tenderly. She wanted him to feel what she was feeling, love and acceptance. She wanted him to realise that she was in this for good and there was nothing that could shake her. She wanted him to know that he was the man she loved and she trusted him with her life.