~ Part 6 ~

::

Once they were inside the TARDIS, they went straight to the infirmary.

"I'm not impressed, you know," he murmured suddenly, as he was rummaging around in cupboards for the devices he would need to run some tests. He couldn't find the transducer probe that he needed to hook up to the ultrasound machine, and he was getting impatient. His anxiety over Rose's safety was making somersaults twist and turn inside his stomach.

"What?"

"You. Keeping this from me. It could be dangerous, and it was stupid of you to not tell me straight away."

"Oh, don't give me that," Rose exclaimed. "If you really cared then you - "

"What?" he demanded. "What would I have done? Well, I would have stayed on Earth and waited for you. Oh, hold on, yes: I did."

"No, you wouldn't have been such a prick in the first place," she huffed, crossing her arms.

"Oh that's mature," he scoffed, and emptied out a cabinet in frustration. "Where is this bloody thing…"

"Don't you dare try and turn the blame on me," Rose said next. "You were the one who went off with someone else."

He ran a hand through his hair, sighing in exasperation. "I've said I'm sorry. I don't know what else I can do. But the fact is, you being pregnant and not telling me, that was – it was – it was irresponsible, Rose, and - "

"It was irresponsible of you to not fucking tell me I could get pregnant in the first place!" she shouted.

He straightened up in surprise, temporarily abandoning his quest. "What?" he whispered.

She exhaled roughly and sat down on the infirmary bed. "You said we didn't need to worry about protection. And I believed you. Any other man, and I would've been out of there like a shot after a line like that, but you – I trusted you! I thought you were the more knowledgeable one about this. So I believed you." She shook her head at herself. "And now look what's happened."

The Doctor looked to the floor, swallowing hard. "You don't want it, do you," he realised quietly.

Rose said nothing.

He looked up at her and saw that for the first time today, she actually looked like she would burst into tears at any moment. She'd been so strong, even in her fear of what he would say, but now…

"Rose," he said, voice strained, as he came over to stand in front of her. "I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry. I didn't know…I didn't think this could happen for us. I would never have lied to you about something like that, I genuinely didn't think this would be possible. At all. Ever."

Rose hastily wiped at her eyes and lifted her chin defiantly. "We still should've been more careful, just in case."

"I know that now," he murmured. "I just…Rose, on Gallifrey we didn't even reproduce this way anymore."

She frowned in confusion. "Then how…?"

"There was this process called the Looms and – well, I don't want to get into the scientific details right now but basically it was all done via the test tube. We had biological parents, but we didn't develop in our mother's wombs like you lot do. Not for centuries. So…this is a big shock, really. I didn't even think I was, you know, fertile."

"Blimey," she said. "Right. Well."

He let out a long breath and closed his eyes as he asked, "Would you prefer - " He cut off, swallowing convulsively.

"Prefer what?"

His eyes flickered open. "Do you want an abortion?"

Rose breath caught in her throat. They stared at each other in silence for a few moments. And then, she gently shook her head from side to side. "No," she whispered.

"You're sure?" he whispered back.

"I've thought it through," she explained. "I...I'd already decided that I wanted to keep it."

"Okay."

"Do you, though?"

"Do I what?"

"Do you want me to get rid of it?"

He winced at her phrasing, but was firm in his answer. "No, I don't."

"Really?" She sounded dubious.

"I know it happened by accident, and I know the timing is all wrong, and I know that you might think that I'm not capable of being what this child needs," he murmured, looking at the floor. "But it's - it's something special and a bit - a bit fantastic, really. That we made something, something that means that I'm maybe not quite the last, anymore."

Rose couldn't find the right words to respond to that, so she just nodded. And then something occurred to her. "Oh."

"What's wrong?"

"Um." She bit her lip, gathering her thoughts. "I just - I was just wondering. If, when you do the tests, if it seems like to carry this baby would, you know, put me in danger, would you risk it?"

His eyebrows rose, taken aback. "No. Your safety comes first. I would never willingly jeopardise that, not for a baby, not for anything. I would always choose you over a possibility."

The sincere meaning in his words was not lost on Rose, and she managed to offer him a small smile in return. She tried to lighten the conversation a little. "So, I take it you haven't got any other Earth-girls pregnant, then?"

He chuckled despite the situation. "No, Rose. Only you."

"Oh," she smiled slightly. "I feel special."

"You are special," he replied insistently. "Now let's get these tests sorted to put our minds at rest." He turned around again and busied himself with finding the transducer.

Again, Rose bit her lip worriedly. "You know this doesn't change things, right? Me and you, we're not..."

He looked back over at her in surprise. "What?"

"We're not getting back together. You know that, yeah?"

The Doctor scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. "Oh, right, well. If that's...are you sure? Don't you think it'd be nice for us to go back to - "

"No."

"But -"

"Doctor."

"Oh."

"You can be in this baby's life, but I'm not getting back together with you just because of it."

"But you left because of it in the first place."

"Um, no, Doctor. That was just part of the reason, remember?"

"Rose, I'm completely committed to you. You don't have to worry about anyone else, ever, all right? I'd've thought I'd proved to you by now just how much I need you."

"You don't get the easy way out or the reward or whatever just by being persistent, Doctor."

"But when you say that we're not getting back together, you just mean for now, until you're ready? Because I'll wait as long as it takes for you to be ready to forgive me and love me again."

"Doctor..."

"Yeah?"

"I think we should just concentrate on the baby for now. I don't want to keep talking about everything that's happened. The baby's what's important. And you know, us getting to be friends again. The other stuff's just not...I can't deal with all this at once."

"Right. Baby. Friends. Yes. I can do that."

"Good."