Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy VI

Enjoy!

051. Raw

Celes has only cried until her eyes felt raw on one occasion in her life. Even decades later, she could remember the betrayal she'd felt as they'd waited to see if the Phoenix Magicite could work its magic. She felt sick to her stomach as she desperately hoped this girl would just die, but could not bring herself to even empathise properly. Her stomach had sunk with the betrayal, and her heart ripped out of her chest to go along with it. She felt sickened to the pit of her lead filled stomach as they all waited, and when she saw Locke emerge with a blank look on his face, she knew that her despicable prayers had been fulfilled. She felt disgusted in herself.

She'd hidden in the trees outside the village as the others took some time around the shops and inns, and cried until she felt as though her eyes may blister and her throat would never allow her to talk again. She didn't even know if when she next registered where she was, it was that evening, or sunrise the next morning, or maybe even later than that. All she knew was that she knew nothing. All the truths she'd fed herself so that she could have some semblance of hope left were lies, all the things she'd thought she'd felt and the affection she'd been given in return, wasn't even real. All that she knew was the pain. The endless, everlasting pain. She felt like it was slowly killing her.

She did not even talk to Locke for weeks after that.

"Celes?"

"Yes?" It had become her customary reply; cold, sharp, and unrepentantly terse.

"Celes - it's me."

She turned to face the tall treasure hunter, taking time to inspect his face for the first time in months.

"I know."

His face darted into a tense grin that disappeared just as quickly as it had appeared. "Of course you do." His voice was quiet, barely above a mumble, but tender.

"What do you want?"

"Celes... I still care about you."

She turned away from him, and her hands tensed into fists so tight, her fingernails almost cut moon-shaped crescents into her palms.

"That's nice."

She heard him shift behind her.

"What- that's it? That's all you have to say - 'that's nice'?"

She sighed, keeping her firm control over her anger. She would not let it show. "Yes." Her voice was as terse as ever.

"No Celes. I know you. You've got to have more to say than that."

She turned to face him with a blank expression. "Locke, I thought I knew you. We can all be wrong."

She watched him squirm slightly, and he sighed. "You're right. There are lots of things I should've told you. But I didn't want to reopen that painful wound if I didn't need to. I was just happy being with you."

Celes tensed her jaw. She nodded.

"So..." he pushed on, clearly noting her tense demeanour. "So I didn't say anything about it. And I should've done, but I didn't want to hurt you when I didn't ever think you'd have to know. I thought you were dead Celes. I thought you were dead, and I reverted into how I had been all those years ago. I'm sorry."

Celes couldn't hold it in any longer. The anger pushed against her cold interior as a raw, untamed force. "I thought that everyone had died, Locke. After grandpa Cid died, I jumped off a cliff because I thought I would be better off dead than alive. But it was your bandana that I found that forced me to go on." She produced the silken blue material from a pouch tied around one of her legs. "This," She gestured to the balled up material in her hand, "is the only reason I am still alive. But you can have it."

She threw it at Locke, and he failed to catch it, stunned that he was.

"I- Celes, I-"

She just glared at him, feeling the untamed emotion flow through her like magic did in the midst of battle.

"Celes, I didn't know."

"Now you do." She had nothing more to say, and turned away from him again.

She felt a warm hand gently come to rest on her shoulder. She tensed up even more than she was already.

"What do you think you're doing?"

"Even though I never knew, I did send that bandana for you." He paused, and she untensed under his hand. "Celes, I still care about you more than anyone else in this world." She let out a long breath, and felt his arms encircle her. "Rachel is my old life. That life is gone, now. I loved her once, many years ago, but there's someone else, now. Someone who suits the person I've become."

Celes let her head hang forwards.

"Please, promise me that you'll never try to take your own life as long as I'm still here to be by your side."

Celes raised her head up slightly, and then nodded.

Neither said a word. For that very moment, neither had to. For that one moment, things made sense again.

Please review if you've got time and follow for more. Thanks!