A/N: This chapter is longer, I think.

Thank you for all of the luvverly reviews. You people are very nice.

Now give me more, or I will eat you.

Chapter Six: The one with Cid being mean…
"Plot, huh?" Cid asked, taking a long drink. It'd only been a half hour, but he'd already started to feel the effects of going without his cigarettes. In response to this, he'd started drinking. When he started feeling a bit tipsy, he wished for a cigarette, and immediately started drinking again when he remembered that he didn't have one.

Tifa felt that she should stop this vicious cycle, but Cid was paying good Gil for his alcohol, and he was a customer after all. In the meantime, she'd filled him in on the plot. She figured that Cid might be able to help out a bit, seeing as how he had countless numbers of 'connections'.

"Yep." Tifa affirmed, finally deciding that enough was enough and taking away Cid's glass. "Yuffie came up with it…"

Tifa and Cid eyed Yuffie with apprehension. She was quiet for now…but sooner or later, she'd start up again, and who knew what would happen then?

"I think you gave her a concussion." Cid whispered, giving the ninja a wary look. She was building a house of cards on the floor, humming quietly to herself.

"I mean, she's always been… y'know… weird…but this is strange, even for Yuffie."

Tifa thought that he might be right. After all, she did hit pretty hard, and the ninja was behaving more oddly than usual. "What should we do?" she whispered back.

"Distract her." Cid said with a slightly wicked grin. "Think about it: what's the one thing that could take her mind off of… whatever it's generally on?" He paused, obviously waiting for Tifa to come up with the answer he had in mind.

Finally, she did. "Cid, you're really cruel, you know that?" She asked, putting her hands on her hips and fixing the pilot with a glare. "How'd you like it if somebody did that to you?"

Highwind shrugged. "Don't know, don't care. All I know is, it'll keep Crazy down there out of our hair for a while."

Tifa looked him up and down. "You're really drunk, aren't you?" She asked.

"Getting' there." Cid responded. "Now… how about it? Should we make the call?"

For the second time that day, Tifa just gave up. "Make the call." She said resignedly. "But you can deal with the consequences, since it was your idea after all."

Cid just gave her another evil grin, making it very clear that he didn't give a damn about the consequences, whatever they might be. Taking Tifa's statement to mean 'yes', he quickly outlined his plan of attack.

(ooh... a scene change... that's so high-tech...)
"Alright." He said, holding up the phone. "All I've gotta do is hit redial, right?"

Tifa, who was holding onto Yuffie's arm to keep the ninja in the room, nodded. "Let's make this quick, OK?" She pleaded. She'd never liked prank calls, and even though this didn't quite fall under the category, it was still a cruel trick to play.

"Hey, what's goin' on?" Yuffie asked cheerfully. "Who're we calling?"

"You'll find out soon enough, kiddo." Cid pressed the button, put the phone on speaker, and waited. It rang a few times, and then, surprisingly, someone picked up.

"Hello?" There was a fair amount of trepidation in Vincent's voice. Tifa was surprised that he'd even picked up the phone in the first place, considering what had happened the last time… Sensing a shriek coming on, Tifa clapped her hand over Yuffie's mouth.

"Heya, Vincent." Cid said, giving Tifa a wink. "It's Cid." They heard a sigh of relief from the other end.

"For I minute, I thought…" Vincent began. Then he stopped, and Tifa could imagine him shuddering. "It doesn't matter. What is it?"

Cid, who had started to laugh silently, took a few minutes to compose himself, and then said, "We- that is, Tifa and I- have run into a little problem. She's got her date with Strife, and I've got some work to do. That means there's no one to watch the bar tonight."

Vincent was silent for a few moments as he thought it over. "So…Yuffie's not there anymore?" He ventured cautiously. Yuffie made a few muffled attempts at speech, saying something that sounded like 'VINNIE!!', but Tifa kept her hand firmly on the ninja's mouth.

Cid grinned, unable to believe how easy this was going to be. "Nope. Long gone." He had to concentrate to keep from bursting into laughter.

Vincent sighed. "What do you want me to do?" he asked resignedly.

Too easy, Cid decided as he told Vincent what he needed. "Just get here around… em… five-ish… I dunno when Tifa and Strife are plannin' on being home…" He made himself deliberately vague.

"Fine." Vincent said. There was a long pause. "You're sure that you-know-who isn't there?"

"Absolutely sure." Cid promised solemnly. "See ya, Vincent." He hung up the phone, and immediately burst out laughing. "I had no idea he was so gullible," he wheezed, clutching the desk for support as he wiped tears of mirth from his eyes.

Tifa frowned at him in disapproval. "I still don't think that it was very fair." She said.

"MMPHMM!!" Yuffie said pointedly. Tifa remembered that she was still covering the ninja's mouth, and let go.

"Thanks a lot," Yuffie said huffily. "What was that for? I could've been quiet."

This statement made Cid laugh even harder. "Yeah right." He scoffed. "I bet you can't keep your mouth shut for one minute."

"Can too." Yuffie stuck out her tongue. "I just don't want to, that's all." She shut her mouth tightly, and began watching the clock, counting on her fingers.

After exactly sixty seconds, she burst out, "SEE! I TOLD YOU SO!"

Tifa and Cid covered their ears and winced. "Look, Yuffie." Tifa said, a plan coming to her. "Y'think you could be quiet for… five minutes?"

The ninja nodded. "Sure." She said. "Easy as pie."

"How about… ten minutes? Fifteen? Twenty? Thirty?" Receiving a nod after each one, Tifa pressed on. "So, you think you could remain absolutely quiet for an entire half hour?"

Yuffie hesitated. "Umm… sure… I could do it. I can totally be quiet for… thirty minutes." She sounded unsure of herself.

"Good." Cid said. "Then do it. It's four thirty, and we need to… get ready…"

A/N: To be continued… (Dun dun dunnnnhhh….)

Coming up next: Poor Vincent…. (Insert evil laugh here.)