Ghostly Emotions
A/N: I didn't want to change this one too much because it plays an important role in how Severus thinks. I know that you can't review me again as I'm replacing the chapters but feel free to mail them to me.
Xxx
Sparks
After leaving Jessica, Severus apparated in front of his home at Spinners end and looked up at the building listlessly. The house did not seem like a home to him as it had done when Jessica had lived with him there. Her laughter had seemed to bring to the place warmth that the sun could not. Her echoing footsteps on the wooden floors had sounded like a gentle hymn and her dirty finger marks, tiny hand marks on the wall, had seemed to give the house character. Since her acceptance of her role in the downfall of the Dark Lord and her subsequent move to the bar had emptied the building of what little happiness there was. The building was now a true reflection of how Severus felt without her there – cold; empty and devoid of love.
Severus knew that Jessica had been harsh with him for good reason and that she probably didn't mean what she had said, or at least he hoped not, but all the same he could not seem to swallow the lump that had formed in his throat from the moment she had begun to chide him. He seldom got to see Jessica. He was always kept busy first with Hogwarts and now with attempting to thwart Voldemort. She was kept busy between her missions and running the bar. He hated that the times he did see her seemed to always lead to an argument from either side.
He let himself in and made his way to his study where he poured himself a tumbler of firewhiskey and sat at the empty fireplace, turning the glass in his hands. "Did you have a fight?" a female voice asked from behind him. Severus sighed and responded almost silently, "it's all we seem to do lately... fight, bicker, argue... disagree..." he sipped at the firewhiskey slowly.
Lily moved forward and hovered beside him, a ghost determined to ensure her sons safety at all costs, she had remained at Spinner's End and although she mostly only appeared to discuss what was happening, she did appear when she knew Severus needed someone to talk to. "She's just under a lot of pressure Severus. She's young and she's had to give up the best parts of her life to do this" she said gently, putting a hand on the man's shoulder which sent chills down his spine.
Severus looked up at her, "I know... If I could I'd do it. I'd take it all away from her and let her just live" he said and Lily could not tell if his eyes were red from the alcohol or the unshed tears, "you are an amazing father Sev" she said quietly. Severus nodded and looked out the window, draining his glass of the remainder of the whiskey.
"You're just lucky she isn't greasy haired" a males voice said from the door. Severus sighed and rubbed his temples, feeling the onset of a headache coming. Severus closed his eyes again and said; "I've already had to deal with that idiot that was your best friend, so just leave" His voice was cold and hard and there was no trace of emotion left on his face when he turned to face his nemesis. "He's only acting tough because he's worried about Harry" Lily's soft voice said. Severus' throat tightened and he sighed. He looked up at Lily, ignoring her translucent husband altogether, "I know Lily, and he's fine. Jess was a bit careless and nearly got herself killed…the stupid child, but Harry doesn't know anything and she managed to get away in time." He said gently. Lily's ghostly features lit up as she smiled, "That's good…I'm glad to hear that. Thank you Severus." Snape couldn't help but smile at her, "It's a pleasure Lily…and once this is done?" Lily nodded and moved closer to him, "Once Harry has defeated Voldemort" Snape winced as though someone had struck him and she ignored it, "James and I will be able to move on and rest peacefully knowing that nothing will happen to him." Severus nodded, "I understand" he said quietly, and he did. He understood that this was meant to happen. He had been born a bad person, as his father loved to say, and he would lose the person he loved twice and maybe pay a higher sacrifice if he had to, to ensure that he could at least rid the world of some evil.
The ghost of James Potter moved to Lily and put his arm around her shoulders, he seldom spoke to Snape unless it was to mock him, and now was no different. Lily looked up at James and smiled sadly then looked at Severus, "Is Jessica coming home tonight?" Snape shook his head, his face instantly becoming cold and calculated. James had grown to understand that when this happened, Snape was attempting to hide his hurt or fear. Lily frowned, "Did you ask her to?" she scolded him. Snape looked up at her and said coolly, "She is insolent, a trait she certainly didn't learn from me. Insolence must be heredity." With this he looked pointedly at James, "and I didn't ask her because she would have just gone off at me about that stupid bar." He added, justifying himself. Lily knelt by him, "Want us to stay the night?" she asked gently. Behind Lily, James pretended to gag which made Snape say quickly, "I am a grown man Lily and I have been alone and enjoying it for quite some time thank you very much." He was being huffy and he didn't care if it was against his character, he wouldn't give that stupid man, ghost or not, the satisfaction of riling him until his stupid son saved the stupid world.
Lily shook her head and stood, "Severus…" she sighed and said, "We'll be going then. Thank you again." She said quietly and took James hand. James had by this point straightened up and held his hand out for Lily. Lily took it and they slowly faded away.
Severus sighed and sunk in his chair, "The man is ridiculous…even when he's dead." He muttered and stood up, deciding that perhaps an early night would do his aching body some good. He changed into his night shirt and climbed into bed, settling back under the covers and looking at the ceiling. The last thought in his mind before he drifted off was that he should invent away to give ghosts wedgies. This thought made him smile in his sleep.