So I was playing KH2. And I realized, oh crap. Nobodies actually do remember everything about their former lives...except for Roxas and Namine. Well. I think we can just ignore that for this story, right? It's not like when 358/2 Days comes out, this whole story's going to be totally inaccurate anyway.

Oh, also...I'm changing her name. To Xylanis. Kind of sounds like Alanis, as in Morissette. Haha, hope you don't mind, I just think it sounds a lot better. I'll edit the first couple chapters soon to fix that.

Chapter Four: Do Nobodies PMS?

The next day, another blast of water to my face served as a morning greeting.

It barely stirred me, until Demyx poked me anxiously and said, "You might wanna get up before Larxene comes..."

That woke me up. With effort I opened my eyes and sat up. "I'm up, I'm up," I assured him groggily. I did not want a repeat of my first morning.

It was a close call, too, because within moments of my zombie rise from sleep, Larxene glided into my room.

"Oh, well, hey there, sunshine!" she cackled. Yeah, she does a lot of cackling.

She was really starting to annoy me. After all, she was acting like she got some huge promotion just 'cause some newb showed up.

"Why do you keep showing up in my freaking room, Larxene?" I snapped.

Blondie just raised her eyebrows and grinned. Then, with a giggle, she left the room. I wanted to pull her stupid zoomy bang things out of her scalp.

Demyx smiled sympathetically at my cross expression. "She's bad enough when you're a higher rank than her."

"I just don't really know why my room seems to be some communal gathering area," I muttered grumpily.

Demyx looked away, shamefaced. I was too tired not to feel bad, because I hadn't meant him; I'd just meant that two other people in my room in the wee hours was overwhelming. But I didn't waste the effort to comfort a fake emotion.

"Anyway," I compromised grudgingly, swinging my legs over the side of my bed. "I'll get over it once I'm awake. Out you go."

But Demyx didn't even seem to be on the planet. His mouth was O-shaped as his hand touched his outrageously flaming cheeks.

I waved my hand in front of his face, and he blushed even more as he apologized and ran out of the room.

I stared at the closed door for a few moments with a sense of great unease. Why was everyone acting all surprised over above-average emotions? Were they onto me? Were they postponing my execution bceause they wanted to prove a point? Give me false information?

I shook my head, utterly perplexed. The pieces didn't fit.

---

My unease disappeared when I walked out the door. Demyx was handing me breakfast-on-the-go, something akin to an Eggo waffle. I was psyched. No creepy Marly this morning! Getting inside his head would wait until I was fully awake.

I grinned widely, and Demyx's still embarrassed look evaporated. "Come on," he said lightly, and we turned to walk down the residence hall.

"Sho dish big mishun ish lwetting me shkip breakfasht?" I asked, my face full of waffle.

My mentor nodded happily. "I mean, I honestly think you're doing so well already that you don't need much extra time. But...you don't mind skipping, do you?"

I shook my head vehemently. "No way!"

The pile of weapons was gone this morning. My weapon of choice was set. Demyx handed me my daggers...but this time they were really pulsing with some inner power. I remember seeing Larxene receive her weapon, newly charged with electricity to fit her powers.

I wondered what they had done for me, the magical dud.

Demyx grinned good-naturedly. "Surprise! I spoke to the Superior and got it powered up. Try them out."

I paused, unsure how exactly I was supposed to do that.

"Close your eyes."

I immediately tensed. Bad idea, bad idea! So this was how they planned to get rid of me...

But as soon as my spy instincts kicked in, I felt strange. Quickly, I looked at my hands...but they were completely black, blending into my cloak!

"Holy crap!" I yelled, dropping the daggers. My hands immediately went back to normal.

Demyx chortled and picked them up, pressing them back into my hands. "It draws energy from your cloak to change your whole body so you can blend into shadows."

Of course. I mean, their cloaks weren't just uniforms or fashion statements....they protected us--I mean, them from consumption by darkness and, more importantly, kept the super sniffer Zexion from discovering my very un-nobody-ish scent. Who knew what else the cloaks were good for?

But a lot of good shadow-blending would do. Our--their castle was all white, light, white. Loads of shadows to hide in here, to be sure. Not. Still, maybe out in the field...I wondered again about this mission.

"There's something else," Demyx was saying, sounding a lot like those commerical guys. Wait! There's more! I forced myself to pay attention. "Now, act like you want to backstab me...a good, killing blow. But not quite...I'd rather not die in training." I knew he was joking. My daggers will still blunted. And yet, even now I couldn't help feeling suspicious. But I prepared myself...and before I knew it, I was behind Demyx, one dagger poised to kill. There hadn't been time to blink.

Demyx nodded, satisfied and smug. "All right. What we're going to do today is learn how to control these powers. You have to learn restraint, because it takes a lot of energy."

I could feel it. I was already sorta tired.

"Okay." I nodded.

Again, there followed an exhilarating clash between the two of us...and yet so much more exciting because now, we both had our special abilities. I could've sworn I hadn't had this much fun in years.

We worked and worked, taking a couple short breaks, and then my trainer gave me an hour to clean up for lunch.

"Really awesome, Xylanis. I think you're going to be really great."

It was so strange. The way he said it was so cheerful and friendly, like he really wanted me to succeed. I barely repressed a shiver. This was a lot harder than I'd thought it would be, resisting their trap...

Still, his broad smile put me in a great mood, and I grinned back. This was a whole other side of Demyx, a side only a human disguised as a nobody could see. I felt sure that no one else had seen this part of Demyx. Maybe that was why he was so nervous, because no one expected anything of him.

Whoa, Alisyn, you've got to stop thinking like that. He is not a human. He has no heart.

---

Lunch brought something very interesting. I was in a good mood, so I was prepared to see what was up with my good pal Marly. And he didn't disappoint.

It was really strange. Larxene made a point of being even more obnoxiously loud than usual, talking to Luxord. Demyx looked like he might say a couple things to me, but Marluxia was there between us, and he spoke to me, purposefully excluding my trainer from the conversation.

"So..." Pinky murmured as we started eating. "Now that you're about to be initiated...what do you think of the Superior?"

Oh! What was this? Was I detecting dissent in the Organization? This sounded exactly like the little girls on the playground who hated some other girl and wanted to rally others to her cause, using traditional group snub tactics. And just in case a candidate happened to like that certain girl, they'd ask beforehand, trying to be all casual.

Was I overreacting? The past couple days hadn't given me as much info as I'd've liked--maybe I was just grasping at straws.

Then again, Larxene grinned, and her voice got even louder, which I didn't believe possible. Axel glanced discreetly at us and struck up a conversation with Demyx of all people, who was looking puzzled at his exclusion.

"Um..." I thought. Stir up a little civil war in the Organization? Sounded like a good idea. But then, I didn't want to get involved or it could interfere with my mission, especially if I ended up on the losing side.

Hm...I made my decision.

"He's pretty annoying, actually," I muttered, carefully keeping my face casual and digging heartily into my meal, as if I didn't notice that everyone was being very careful to keep our conversation hidden. "He's not getting us anywhere as an Organization--he's obviously only using us for his personal goals, which are delusional at that. And more than that, he's a windbag and sometimes reminds me of a creepy pedophile. His breath stinks and he chews with his mouth open. Disgusting."

Apparently I'd said the right thing. Marluxia grinned widely. "Maybe we should talk a little about that...later..."

I looked at him questioningly. But I knew I'd been right on the dot.

With any luck, things were about to get a little dangerous.

---

It was work, work, and more work that afternoon. Getting control over my energy was like trying to control my breathing when singing... yes, I did do a bit of that, but don't ask me to perform anything, kay? Anyway, it was pretty difficult, but again I could feel myself getting a sort of handle on it as we practiced. Demyx was a fantastic teacher, and he gave me lots of tips to help as well. Our powers were different, but the principles were the same.

I went to dinner, ravenous. All I wanted to do was get some food in my poor overworked body, but before I could take my first bite, Larxene just had to interrupt me.

"So, what's up with the closed sessions? What's the matter, little Thirteen?" she pouted. "Does Demyx make you look incompetent? It's okay, it's hard for anyone to learn from such an idiot."

Larxene had done absolutely nothing but get on my nerves since I got here. Also, I was starting to really...respect Demyx, I guess. He was a good teacher, you know. And on Marluxia's other side I caught a glimpse of him hunching in shame, the typical Nocturne everyone knew and scorned. So for some strange reason, I lashed out to defend a nobody with no feelings, who probably didn't care.

"You know what, Larxene?" I slammed my fork down on my plate. My whole half of the table turned to look at me. "Demyx was doing amazing today, I bet he could pound you into the dirt if he really tried. I'm proud to learn from him, and I bet I'd never learn near as much from you. So give me five minutes' peace and shut your stupid obnoxious mouth!"

My outburst was greeted with shock, even from Demyx. The oldest six members even glanced at me quizzically.

I think they were all pretty sure nobodies don't PMS.

I forced myself to grin, though my face was on fire. "Haha, gotcha!"

Three seconds of silence, and then everyone was laughing. The old guys looked away, not knowing or caring what had happened. Demyx gave a sort of grateful smile to me, but I didn't count it. It was fake, of course.

The only expressions that worried me were Marluxia's...and Axel's. I couldn't understand them. Maybe they just weren't good at fake-laughing.

---

Journal, Day Three:

It seems like my companions are obsessed with showing great displays of emotion, and then acting horrifically surprised over it. I guess they do this to all new members, to draw them in? Though I can't see how that would help. It's all pretty ridiculous, actually. I think maybe they could be seeing completely through me, and just want to try and prove they have feelings, to throw us off. They're like children, giving their own unique, fake personalities to lifeless dolls.

But it doesn't really seem like they know at all...I'll try to figure this out, and be a little more cautious.

Other than that, I'm pretty sure there's conflict brewing here. Marluxia is most likely the head of it. I can't be totally sure yet, but I think Larxene is involved, too, and Axel, perhaps?

We'll see how this unfolds.

Oh, I got my power for my daggers. They've basically handed me a weapon to use against them. I can sneak around in shadows and move extremely quickly. I think this'll be pretty useful, if I can find any shadows in this stupid castle.