It was Tuesday of Rock Week, and just as hectic as always. The idols were busy since the minute they'd woken up, but Kris needed to make time to call Katy. He hadn't talked to her in a few days and he found himself worrying that she was with someone else. He knew he was being paranoid, but the thought just kept crossing his mind, and he needed to hear her voice.

He walked away after lunch, pulling his phone from his pocket and dialing Katy's number.

"Hello?" She answered after two rings.

"Hey, it's me," Kris started.

"Oh, hi, Kris! You really have time to call me on a Tuesday afternoon?" She sounded happy to hear his voice.

"I made time," Kris said. "I miss you."

"I miss you, too," she said. "But I'll see you after the show today, right?"

They usually got to visit after the show ended, but only for a few minutes. "Yeah," he said.

"Are you gonna sing well tonight?" Katy asked.

"I hope so," Kris said. "So, what've you been up to?" He bit his lip, not knowing how to ask what he really wanted to know.

"Same-old," she said dully. "You?"

"Busy all the time," Kris laughed. "Same-old."

"How's Adam?"

Kris flinched. She could tell the two were friends from seeing them on the show, and Kris had told her about how well they were getting along. "He's fine," Kris said, wanting to change the subject.

"He must be real excited for rock week," she said, laughing. "What's he singing?"

"Um… a Zeppelin song, I think…" Kris looked around, trying to act busy. "Listen, I gotta go get ready now, I'll talk to you later."

"See you tonight!"

"Yep, see you tonight. Bye." Kris hung up and stared at the phone in his hand for a while. He wasn't able to ask her. He knew she wasn't cheating but he couldn't shake the feeling. She seemed pleasant enough on the phone. He stood there for a few more minutes, thinking.

His phone beeped suddenly, and Kris flipped it open. It was a text from Adam: "Whats wrong?"

He smiled. Adam must have seen him standing there and gotten worried. "Nothing just talked to Katy," he texted back, smirking when he saw the blue nail polish that was still on his thumb from the night before. Flashbacks invaded his memory suddenly, and he tried to force them out; he shouldn't be thinking about this right now. His phone beeped again a few seconds later. "Did u tell her?" the message said. Kris blinked; he was somewhat surprised that Adam was worried about that. He typed back "No" and hit send as he walked to a producer that was motioning him over.

----

Kris and Danny were doing a duet together. Adam and Alison were paired together because they were the two rockers, obviously, while Danny and Kris were just "the other two." He hated working with Danny, though. He was always smug and confident, which was a little annoying to be around. Kris rehearsed with him just as much as necessary, putting on a friendly smile, because that's just how he was. Even if Gokey bugged the hell out of him, he'd put on a smile and laugh along.

Adam and Allison seemed to be getting really close, Kris noticed. The three of them had always been good friends on the show, but Allison was always hugging up on Adam now, and they were always together, laughing. He didn't mind, he told himself. It was just an observation.

----

Later, after the idols had all gotten changed, they walked to the makeup studio. A few minutes after Kris sat in his chair, he got another text from Adam. It said, "R u going to tell her?" Kris held the phone in his palm for a minute or two while his makeup artist powdered his face. He eventually typed back saying, "I dont think so." He leaned back in his chair and sighed, trying not to think about it.

Adam, sitting away on another side of the studio, smiled when he got the text. He and Kris had a secret, and Kris not telling his wife made it much more intimate. He was being so selfish, though. When he thought about how it might affect Kris' marriage, he was overwhelmed with guilt. It was definitely painful to think about, and Adam usually avoided doing so, but he knew it must be eating away at Kris. He wasn't sure what to do about it; he wanted to apologize but it seemed too late for that.

He wouldn't tell anyone either, Adam decided. It was a situation that was special to them, and nobody else needed to know about it. Nobody else would probably understand the relationship they shared, anyway.

----

American Idol began, and Adam was singing first. Kris almost considered not watching because he knew it would distract him, but he had to see. It was Adam, they were good friends, of course he'd watch him perform. He stood against the wall, giving himself a decent view of the stage, along with a little privacy from everyone else.

Adam walked casually onto the stage while they showed his video clip. He looked just like any rock star should, and he pulled off the look easily. The guitar started playing, and Kris' eyes didn't leave Adam for a second. He was sucked into the performance, while he consciously tried not to think about the song's message. He just watched Adam perform, savoring every second of it, but trying not to hold on to it. He didn't know what he was doing or thinking, really; the lack of sleep along with stress, stress, and more stress, were all taking their toll on his brain. Adam really knew what he was doing on that stage, he always seemed to, and Kris was a little jealous of his confidence. Adam finished the song with a bang, and the audience went crazy. Kris let out a heavy breath that he didn't realize he'd been holding. Everyone was screaming.

The judges praised Adam, as usual, and Kris was more than ready to hug him the second he walked offstage. Adam let him go after a second or two, leaving Kris feeling warm and dizzy. He watched as Adam walked away, hugging everyone else just as enthusiastically.

The duet with Gokey went pretty well, Kris thought. He didn't like the song, and he didn't really like performing with Danny, but he put on his cheerful face and just enjoyed being able to sing. It upset him little when Simon told him that Danny sang better than he did, though. He'd have to try harder during his next song, hopefully so he could stay in the competition. He struggled to keep his mind in the present. It still felt like it was spinning out of control.

He wasn't as focused as he should've been when it was his turn to sing "Come Together." He managed to sing well and get into the music, but he had to try pretty hard not to screw up the words. When it ended, Kris tried to be more focused on what the judges were telling him than he was on where his wife was sitting, and where Adam was standing. He kept wondering if she would be able to see their next offstage hug. He was so scared that she might be able to see the emotions on his face while he was wrapped up in Adam's arms. The judges gave their feedback, and Kris walked off the stage after Seacrest gave his voting number.

Allison was waiting for him and he hugged her tightly as she said her congratulations. He thanked her happily, and looked around. Adam stood a few feet away, smiling proudly and taking a few small steps towards him. Kris walked into his embrace, letting his face hit Adam's shoulder. He wanted nothing more than to squeeze Adam into him until his arms went numb, so he could possibly be distracted from the pain in his chest and throat, but he held him loosely instead. Adam patted his back and soon pulled Kris away by his shoulders, telling him "good job!" while Kris smiled up at him dumbly.

----

Kris' body was exhausted, but his mind refused to let him sleep. He, Allison, Danny, and Adam had spent the rest of the night hanging out and watching the show back, and now they'd all finally headed to get some rest. Everyone else was probably sound asleep by now. Adam hadn't come into his room yet, so Kris assumed he'd just gone to sleep, too.

He felt insecure. All he was able to think about during the show was Adam, but Adam seemed completely confident, focused, and just normal. After what happened last night, Kris' mind just kept going back to Adam, no matter what he'd try to think about. He didn't want it to show, though; he didn't want Adam knowing how easily he could control his mind completely. He wasn't sure what he would think, and he didn't want to imply anything serious. Sighing, Kris stretched his arm up onto his pillow and rested his head on it. He needed to sleep, but his mind wouldn't shut down.

He laid there for a few more minutes, breathing slowly and trying to fathom the hugeness of American Idol. It was difficult to do, and Kris was really feeling the pressure of it all. Sure, it was a challenge and it drained him physically and mentally, but Kris knew he would never have another opportunity this big. He had to seize this chance. He knew he probably wouldn't win the show, but he wanted to make it farther, gain a little more fame, before he left the spotlight. His heart skipped a beat when he suddenly heard his door creak open. "Adam," Kris greeted him, sitting up. He didn't want to look so pathetically excited to see him, but he couldn't help it.

"Hey," Adam said happily, beaming. "I was just talking to Allison for a while. I love her, she's such a sweetheart."

Kris smiled. "Yeah, you two have really gotten close." As Adam sat on his bed, he felt like there was a magnetic pull between them. He wanted to move closer, but he resisted.

Adam had showered when they got home, which had washed off most of his makeup. Kris could faintly smell the fruity scent of his shampoo. Adam's black hair, pushed to one side of his face, hung down to curve around his cheek, and Kris loved the wave that Adam's hair usually had when it wasn't straightened. It looked soft, and the texture somehow contrasted with Adam's sharp, piercing blue eyes. The older singer was looking right at him and Kris felt frozen.

"You did pretty good today," Adam complimented, looking away finally.

"Not really," Kris laughed. "I wasn't as focused as I should've been."

"What was distracting you?"

"Katy," Kris lied. He really didn't want Adam to know about the affect he had on him.

Adam frowned, resting his hands on his knees. "I don't want to break you guys up or anything," he said.

"I thought you didn't mind that," Kris said, scratching at his side lazily.

Adam fidgeted. He looked around the room slowly, at nothing in particular, before he responded. "I feel really bad," he said.

Kris looked up at him, surprised. "You do?" Adam drummed his fingers over his thighs. Kris hadn't noticed him acting so uncomfortable before.

"I'm not usually like this," Adam said in a serious and apologetic tone.

Kris looked lost. "What do you mean?"

"I don't really know how to say this," Adam half-laughed, running a hand through his hair. "I just feel really bad about everything. I feel completely awful about it."

"Really?" Kris asked. "You seemed so comfortable with… everything we're doing."

"Usually I'm… I mean, I've never gone after someone who I couldn't have before. Someone that's unavailable," Adam said, explaining slowly. "I just feel like I came at this whole situation the completely wrong way, you know?"

"Not really," Kris said. Adam was still too far away from him. He wanted to comfort him or something, he didn't even know, but Adam was just too far away. Unable to help himself, Kris moved over to lessen the distance between them, just by a little.

"I've never wanted someone this badly before," Adam said suddenly, locking eyes with Kris. "I felt like I had to do whatever it took. Now everything's a mess." His eyes looked sad, and Kris could tell he was sincere.

Not knowing how to respond, Kris looked down in thought. "I guess it sort of is," he said eventually. Adam sighed, resting his forehead in his palm. "It's my fault, and I want to tell you… just that I'm really sorry about it all. It's so selfish of me."

"It's not like you forced me," Kris said. "We both did it."

"When we first got to the mansion, I was sure you were straight. I knew there was no way it'd ever happen. Especially since you're married," Adam explained. "I seriously couldn't help myself; I still flirted with you all the time. You're so… fucking cute and you're just completely the type of guy I've always wanted to be with. When you actually flirted back, I could tell you weren't serious. But just look at what happened. It's so out of control now."

Kris listened, nodding while his eyes trailed over the patterns on the bed sheet. "It feels right, though," he muttered softly.

Kris looked up and Adam was smiling. He stretched his arm out, scooting over to hook it around Kris' shoulders. "Does it?" he asked. Kris let his head lean on Adam's shoulder, and he felt his body loosen. Touching Adam relieved almost all of his anxiety.

"It's not right," Kris said. "I know that for a fact. It's very wrong, by a few different definitions. But… the way it feels when I'm near you, I can't help but think it's supposed to be this way. It doesn't make much sense, but that's how I feel."

"What about Katy?" Adam asked. His fingers were playing with Kris' hair.

"It's different with her. I mean, I love her," Kris said, struggling with his words. "I could never leave her. You know how much I love Katy."

Adam nodded slightly, leaning his cheek on Kris' hair. "I know," he said.

"I only just met you," Kris added.

"I know."

"I've never even been with a guy before. I haven't really ever been serious with anyone besides Katy."

"Would you consider this serious?"

Kris paused. "Would you?" he asked.

"I don't know," Adam said, smiling and trailing his fingers around Kris' shoulder. "I'm willing to mess around as long as you are. I really like you."

"You probably do this with people all the time, though," Kris said, trying not to sound upset. "I'm just one of many, right?"

"I don't fool around with married guys all the time," Adam laughed. "But, yeah, I've been with a lot of guys before." Kris frowned into Adam's shoulder.

"I haven't," Kris responded, stating the obvious.

"Did you know you liked guys before this?"

"No. I mean, I'd never really considered it before this."

"Are you embarrassed?"

"Yeah," Kris admitted. "I'd really like it if you didn't mention it to anyone. Not like I think you would… I just don't want there to be a chance of-"

"Don't worry," Adam said. "I know it's important. I won't tell anyone if you won't."

Kris turned, placing his hand on Adam's other shoulder and pressing his lips to the older singer's neck. He took a breath. "I can't tell Katy. It'd ruin my life."

Adam frowned. "Kris, you're making me so sad."

Kris shrugged. "We're so different, though," he mused. "How do we get along so good? It's just weird."

"Yeah," Adam agreed. "It's probably because you're so damn nice. It'd be really hard not to get along with you." He giggled softly when Kris kissed the side of his neck again, ticking him.

"One of us might go home tomorrow," Kris said sadly. "It's like a fifty-fifty chance."

"I really hope not," Adam replied, lightly shaking his head. "I really hope we don't."

"If it happens, it'll be for the best, probably."

Adam sighed. "That's true."

"I want to stay longer," Kris said. "Seriously, I might really leave tomorrow."

"Don't leave me here with Danny Gokey," Adam joked. He let himself fall backwards to lie on Kris' bed. Kris looked down at him. He really didn't want to leave.

"If this is my last night here," Kris said in a low voice, "I just want to make the most of it." He leaned over Adam, brushing their lips together softly.

"Don't talk like that," Adam said smiling.

"I'm being serious," Kris whispered, dropping his head down to start kissing Adam's neck again.

"I don't want you to do anything if you think… that you might regret it later."

Kris lifted his head again, and Adam was watching his expression carefully. Kris smiled. "It's too late for that," he said.

"Kris," Adam said, frowning, "I mean it. I really don't want to mess around more than we already have if you're only going to regret it later."

Kris blinked slowly a few times, looking down at Adam's hesitant expression. "I don't know what it is, man," he said. "But I feel like we're supposed to. I can't fuckin' resist it, anyway, even if I wanted to. I need my fix or else I'll just go nuts thinking about it, you know?"

Adam laughed. "Yeah, I know exactly what you mean."

Kris looked at him for a few more seconds before leaning down again. He tangled his fingers into Adam's hair while they kissed sloppily, and Adam pulled Kris down to lie fully on top of him. "I really like you," Adam breathed into his ear, sending a chill down Kris' body and making his breath shake. "I don't want you to go. It's selfish of me, but I want it to stay like this."

"I know," Kris breathed, his voice uneven. He slid his hand under Adam's shirt, making him shiver. He felt Adam's body, experimentally rubbing and squeezing his skin, and the Adam moaned quietly.

"Take your shirt off," Kris whispered down at him. "I wanna see more of you."

Adam wiggled and squirmed around, pulling his shirt up and over his head. He pulled Kris back down for another kiss as he tossed the shirt to the floor. Kris felt his body heating up, and he pulled his own shirt off. He fell over onto his side, letting his hand wander over Adam more, and Adam brought his own hands to Kris' chest. He soon rolled Kris onto his back, and lowered his head down to place a few light kisses onto Kris' stomach as he laid over him. Kris bucked his hips up with a moan, letting Adam feel how hard he was, but Adam only smiled and moved up to lick and bite along Kris' chest. He pinched a nipple and Kris gasped at the sensation, throwing his head back slightly.

"You like this?" Adam asked when Kris arched his chest up. He rolled Kris' nipple in between his fingers and Kris gasped softly again.

"S'weird," Kris breathed.

Adam chuckled. "I think you like it," he said, and suddenly reached down to squeeze the bulge in Kris' pants. "Aah-!" Kris moaned a little too loudly. He hadn't been expecting that. Adam grinned and kept his hand there, stroking Kris slowly through his pants and looking down at him lustfully. Kris licked his lips and drew in heavy breaths, moving his hips up into Adam's touch.

Adam stretched himself over Kris' body, leaning down to assault Kris' mouth with his tongue. They stayed like that for a few minutes; kissing desperately and rubbing against one another, breathing in quiet moans.

"What do you want to do?" Adam asked eventually, his lips against Kris' ear. "I'll do whatever you want." The intensity in his voice made Kris' heart jump in his chest, and his mind flooded with excitement and fear. He didn't know how to answer.

"What do you want to do?" he asked back, his mouth hot against Adam's neck. Adam sat up and lifted Kris' lower body, quickly positioning himself to press his crotch between Kris' legs. He groaned, leaning back down to drag his teeth over Kris' neck, very slowly moving against him. "You know what I want to do," he whispered.

Kris tried to laugh, but he was so breathless that it hardly came out. He cleared his throat. "What else, besides that?" he said. Adam thrust against him again, and Kris let out a moan. "Not that," he said again to clarify.

Adam leaned back, enjoying Kris' dazed expression and letting his hands roam to Kris' waist. He slipped a hand under his pajama pants, not hesitating for a second to wrap his fingers around Kris' aching hard-on and stroke it, rough and fast. Kris' head flew back in an instant, and a dry groan escaped his throat. "Adam-!" he croaked, squeezing his eyes shut. His whole body was in frenzy; every one of his nerves tingled with need and desire, spreading heat like fire on his skin. His back was starting to stick to the bed, and he struggled for a breath. Adam didn't stop, he watched hungrily as Kris writhed under him.

"You like this?" he asked, but Kris was too incoherent to put together a response. He bucked his hips up, moaning and panting and struggling because the sensation was so much, too much, but it wasn't quite enough. His cock leaked pre-cum and Adam's fist was catching the moisture, spreading it and sliding his hand more freely, much faster now. The younger singer's body was twisting upward, his hands clawing at the bed sheets and bunching them in his fists. "Adam, fuck, Adam, fuck," he heard himself repeating in a low, low whisper under his breath. Adam was rubbing his own erection slowly against Kris, growling. The bed was squeaking under them.

Kris felt himself getting closer, and everything was intensifying. Adam's free hand traveled up and pinched, twisted and squeezed Kris' nipple, and Kris cried out, leaving his mouth open. They were probably being a little too loud, but neither man could have cared less at the moment.

"Gonna come for me, baby?" Adam asked in a harsh, shaky voice. The question almost sounded like a command. Kris nodded, his eyebrows drawn together in a needy, desperate expression.

Kris was so close he felt like he might die. He saw flashes of dark colors under his eyelids, and every muscle in his body felt constricted. Adam's hand was tight around his cock, and he moved it so fast, so much faster than Katy usually could. It felt unreal. He jerked against Adam's body and a dry, low-pitched noise came from his throat. Cum spurted onto his stomach, and some spilled over onto the sheets. Adam moaned, and Kris thrust against his hand a few more times, sucking in breaths of air. "Jeez," he said groggily after a few seconds.

Adam leaned down, trying to catch some of the cum that was spilling down Kris' side with his tongue. Kris watched him with wide eyes, propping himself up on his elbows. "Doesn't that taste bad?" he asked, sounding scratchy. Adam lapped up the semen off of the younger man's stomach, dipping his tongue into Kris' belly button and kissing, sucking, and biting all over his skin. Kris chuckled.

Adam lifted his head and looked into Kris' eyes, licking his lips. Kris watched him eagerly, trying to understand. "There's no way that tastes good," he said, smiling a little.

"How would you know?" Adam said, crawling over to plant a kiss on his mouth. Kris struggled, but Adam stuck his tongue inside, licking around to share the taste. When he opened his eyes and pulled away, Kris was cringing. "Ew," he said. "That is nasty as hell."

"I like it."

"You're gay," Kris teased, and Adam laughed.

"It's your turn now," Adam said after a few seconds, grinning.

"I don't think I have any strength left," Kris laughed jokingly.

"Should have thought of that before," Adam said, rubbing against him.

"What do I do?" Kris asked, giving Adam a kiss.

"Touch my cock," Adam stated obviously. "Or we can do something else, if you want."

Kris smiled nervously. "Sorry, I'm so bad at this," he sighed. "It's new to me." He reached down Adam's body to tug his pants down, and Adam let out a shaky breath. He held Adam's cock in right hand, moving slowly, and Adam moaned, "Yeah," against his ear.

Kris pushed Adam gently off him, and Adam rolled onto his back with a smile. He leaned over and sucked on Adam's nipple softly, unsure, while his hand worked along Adam's erection steadily. Adam moaned and grabbed Kris' hair, digging his fingers in. The reaction was encouraging, so Kris sucked harder, scraping his teeth along the nipple, too. Adam inhaled sharply, raising his hips into Kris' hand.

Adam's skin felt so rough, and his cock was so smooth, and Kris was soon trailing his mouth all around Adam's chest, shoulders and neck, licking and sucking at his sweet-tasting skin. He loved Adam's body, and he loved touching him and tasting him.

"Yeah, baby," Adam moaned in a heavy voice. "That's so good." Kris smiled against Adam's neck, working his arm the best he could. Up and down, up and down, squeezing and stroking, faster and faster; the way he'd always done it to himself.

Adam was biting his lip, breathing heavily through his nose. Kris spit on his hand, and pumped Adam, even faster. "Fuck yeah," Adam hissed quietly, moving his hips against Kris' hand.

Kris groaned. Seeing Adam like this was really, really sexy. He put his mouth over Adam's nipple again, being sure to keep his hand at a quick pace. Adam moaned, a little loudly, as he bucked his hips up more.

"Yeah, yeah, oh fuck yeah," Adam panted, tangling one hand into Kris' hair and the other into his own. He moved around desperately, trying to feel more of the touch, bucking against Kris' hand a little more wildly and making small noises.

Kris was about to ask if he was getting close when Adam groaned, coming all over his stomach and Kris' hand. Kris found himself struggling for breath; he could feel the intensity of Adam's orgasm as his hips twitched once, twice, three times into his hand.

A few moments of silence followed as they slowly recovered. Then Adam sighed, wiping sweat from his forehead. "Baby, baby," he said between deep breaths. "You're so good at that."

Kris smiled wide, extremely pleased with himself. He reached for a tissue and wiped his hand clean, and then wiped it over Adam's stomach. Adam sighed deeply again and leaned over to kiss Kris gratefully. Kris smiled again, and pressed himself against Adam's heated skin.

"It's so late," Kris said. "I haven't been sleeping at all lately because of you."

"Yeah," Adam laughed. "We'll probably get about two hours of sleep from now on."

"Wish you could stay here," Kris said tiredly.

"I think I will," Adam responded evenly. "If it's cool with you."

"Ok, sure," Kris joked.

"I'm serious. We can lock the door and if Alli or Danny comes to wake us up, you can just say I slept in the other bed. We just stayed up talking."

Kris laughed, thinking for a second. "Why would we tell them the door was locked?"

"…Oh. Right." Adam frowned.

"Creep. Now go to your room so we can get a least a little sleep."

"Now that your bed is all sticky and sweaty," Adam said, laughing as he got up.

"Gross," Kris said. "Next time we're going to your room."

"Deal."

"…If I'm still here tomorrow night," Kris added. He suddenly felt choked up at the thought that there was a good chance he wouldn't be.

Adam smiled sadly. "If one of us leaves, we'll know it's for the best. Right?"

"Yeah," Kris said. "Goodnight."

"Sleep well." Adam walked quietly out of the room, blowing a kiss before he closed the door. Kris stared at the closed door for a long time before finally drifting off.

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