I know I posted chapter 5 only yesterday. But I'm going away for few days and in order not to keep you waiting for too long, here's the next chapter, devoted to our favorite terminator.

There is no action and almost no humor in this chapter. It's more or less a psychological introspection, analyze of Cameron's feelings, sensations, emotions and how she copes with the situation in which she has found herself due to John's actions and words. I guess she's so intriguing character that she deserves a special chapter, devoted solely to her and I can only I hope to have managed to capture her somehow believable (for a fanfiction.)

There is only one chapter left – the "finale grande", in which everything should be resolved; hopefully satisfying for the majority of readers. It will be posted in the beginning of next week.

Chapter 6

Cameron stood by the window and peered outside. She had been standing there for few hours without moving a finger, ever since they came back from their 'excursion' to the pub where they gathered drunken John and Derek. After she dispatched Derek on the couch in the living room and carefully brought John to his bed, she locked herself in her room. She didn't want Sarah to pry on her; she didn't want to talk to her or to anyone else, she just wanted to be left alone with her thoughts and analyzes. The words, John said to her, his question, his 'indecent proposal' afterwards, caused a storm of emotions as she had never experienced it before. This time she had to admit to herself that she has emotions. Her problem was that she didn't know how to cope with them.

John's words kept repeating themselves in her mind and she tried to understand what was going on with her. She knew that John was drunk. She was sure however, he was telling the truth. Yes, "in vino veritas" was known to her and she also understood the meaning of these words. So she was still pondering what should be her response when John comes to apologize. She was sure he would come as soon as he was halfway sober. Should she simply ignore what happened on their way from the pub or should she insist to get an explanation what he meant? Should she request him to confirm also in sober state what he had said when he was drunk? On one hand she felt how a small glimmer of hope began to ignite, hope that John in fact saw more than just a machine in her, but, on the other hand, she was afraid that it was just babbling of a drunken person, who had absolutely no idea what they were talking about. He called me Cam. He never before used a nickname for me, but he did it yesterday. Why did I feel warm inside as he called me Cam?

Reasoning and analyzing her attitude, how to behave towards John when he would come here, didn't bring her very far. Her machine nature, her programming, insisted on first option and told her to simply ignore everything, to forget that it ever happened. But the emotions, which began to form something, what she could best describe as a soul, didn't want to let go of the hope, she might someday be loved by John, whom she, that much she now knew, really loved. No, she wasn't lying as she told him "I love you" while talking to him on the phone while he was in Riley's foster parents' home. She believed that she wasn't lying either while she was stuck between two trucks, pleading with John not to take out her chip. She really didn't want to die, she really felt something for John, although she definitely used it as a distraction and was in a way trying to deceive him. The thought never to be able to see John again scared her and caused her overemotional reaction.

She checked her internal clock and was slightly taken aback to see that it was almost noon. How did these hours since they returned home pass so quickly? She turned abruptly and strolled towards her bed. Arriving there, she took off her jacket and began to change. Without consciously deciding, she wanted to dance. She had no idea why, but the urge to dance began to rise in her, stronger every second. After she changed in her ballet outfit, she set off to find appropriate music. Normally she always danced to Chopin's music, but today she somehow chose not to and as she was going through possible music composers, she stumbled upon Tchaikovsky's Swan Lake and decided, it would be the most appropriate for her mood.

As the music began to play, she fell into some kind of trance, not really knowing where she was, not really registering what went on around her. She became one with the music; it filled her completely, becoming the only thing that she registered. She even forgot that nearby there was probably still drunken John, the boy she loved, the boy who could change her existence by simply confirming in sober state that what he was telling yesterday was the truth, the boy who maybe could see beyond her terminator nature. Nothing else mattered, just soft tones, hanging in the air and caressing her with their power, softness and expressions.

Nothing could interrupt her concentration while she danced except if a threat to John would emerge. Her concentration was on the music, on her movements and on John's safety. After the last tone died, she slowly returned to the reality and suddenly felt the urge to cry. She had absolutely no idea why, but her vision began to blur and for the second time in few hours tears damped her cheeks. For the second time in few hours the boy she loved, was the cause for her tears, tears she didn't even know she was able to shed.

Above all, there was a dilemma, why did John ask her what he did. Did he really regard her as a woman, or was it just momentary infatuation, caused by overly consummation of alcohol, resulting in sexual desire, which would die after the alcohol would leave his body? She could easily imagine herself being by his side as his girlfriend. She wistfully smiled at this thought but at the same time it frightened her. Only a day ago this wasn't even an option, but now she saw it as a possibility, she even began to feel happiness and anticipation at this thought. But she really couldn't imagine her being a toy in John's hands, just something that would satisfy his sexual needs. No, that was unimaginable. Further analysis didn't bring her any new revelations, so she decided that she would really have to talk to John and if necessary, force him to tell her the truth. Yes, she noticed even in the past that he was attracted to her, although he furiously tried to deny and hide it. She just didn't know to what extent this attraction expanded. Was it only because of her physical attributes, which, that she knew very well, were very pleasing to the male teenagers' eye, or was it reaching beyond pure physical attraction, into emotional sphere? And now it was time to bring everything out into the open, to finally reveal the truth of their relationship. She knew she longed for their relationship to improve, to maybe advance to girlfriend-boyfriend kind, but she dared not to hope for it. Besides, John was so rude to her the evening before that she wanted to huff a little and let him know that she wasn't ready to take everything for granted. So she decided she would listen to him and act according to his words and actions. She already forgave him; she just had to hide it from him for a while.

As she finally came to this conclusion, she subconsciously smiled slightly. Yes, she would show John that she was a woman; not only physically but also emotionally. According to her information and after absorbing everything she saw on TV, the correct course of action against John was to show him a cold shoulder, to pout, to let him squirm a little before she would forgive him. Although in her nonexistent heart she already forgave him his rude words, for she felt that they weren't lies. She was sure he would soon come to her, squirming like a worm, trying to apologize to her, trying to tell her he made a grave mistake, trying to tell her he wouldn't see her just as an object of his lust.

She knew she should decide how she would behave towards him. She considered different approaches and settled on the typical spouse action: crossing her arms, pouting with expressionless face and tapping her foot while he'd sweat in his tries to reassure her he really didn't mean it the way it came out. Suddenly she giggled quietly at this thought, threw her hands over the mouth and gazed astonished into the mirror, where her image greeted her. What is going on with me? Am I still a terminator, or am I becoming something else? I started crying, I dance, I giggle … I'm defective, no longer reliable protector. I'm starting to act like a human woman!

Standing like a statue with her hands still covering her mouth and staring at herself in the mirror, she felt even more confused than before. I'll have to ask John if he knows what's going on with me. He used to explain things to me. Well, lately not much, but before the explosion, he did. Maybe he was ready to do it again? Her eyes glided along her ballet outfit, wondering if she should change into her usual attire. But somehow she was reluctant to do so and thought that it maybe would have a desired effect on John if he saw her in her black leotard, combined with white pantyhose and golden ballet shoes. Her hair was still tied into pony tail and she pulled the band out to let it spill over her shoulders. She noticed before that John reacted differently to her hairstyles. He obviously preferred it loose, flowing around her face and falling freely over her back. So she decided this would be the outfit to talk to John after he came to her.

She knew very well it was him who should came to her, not the other way around. She giggled again at the thought of John, crawling into her room with guilt in his eyes. This time she didn't stop herself nor did she suppress her giggling. It felt good!

In this moment she heard soft knocking on the door and John's muffled, but unmistakably remorseful voice: "Cameron, may I please come in? I need to talk to you."

TBC