Hearts as Fragile as Glass

A/N:

Hi! The chapter was a bit delayed because I was working on the Valentine's day story, and then got very out of schedule, but it's up now, so I can start working on the next part again. I had said originally that I'd update at least once a week, but I'm trying for once every three days, or so. And lastly, I do know the last chapter didn't really do anything plot-wise, but that had to be said sometime, and I figured earlier on was a good time to put it out there, even if the show does it differently. Alrighty, that's all I have to say. I hope you like the chapter!

Chapter 6

As the other students on the rink were starting out their skating routines, Viktor had Yuuri trying to land the quadruple toe loop.

"Don't worry, you're doing great!" Viktor called out in support, but Yuuri wasn't too sure. He had fallen every time he'd attempted the jump, and the loops were already sloppy and rushed. How have I gotten so out of touch? Yuuri thought as he continued to flub yet another jump. Very consciously recognizing that he wasn't doing his best, Yuuri wasn't sure how he felt about Viktor's support.

"I can't seem to get it." He said after a moment, fully ready to give up. Of course Viktor wouldn't allow that, he was dead-set on making sure Yuuri would complete this jump.

Still discouraged, Yuuri looked over to Phichit, who was on the other side of the ice. He looked like he was doing well enough with Chris; they were practicing combinations. I wish I was doing that, instead of embarrassing myself in front of everyone else.

After a few more failed attempts, Viktor stopped him. "Okay, let's think of this another way. We'll break it down, alright?" He lifted his foot. "You need to make sure you land like this…" His the blade was fully on the ice, and his foot was slightly to the side.

"Fine, fine…" Yuuri sighed. He was a little annoyed, to be honest. Though he had clearly improved with help from Viktor, it felt he didn't get too much of a say on what he was doing with his time on the ice. Sure, Yuuri still didn't completely trust his own decisions, but he hadn't seen Viktor ask for it much. Either way, he almost hoped to find some issue in Viktor's skating abilities when it was his time to coach, unlikely as it was, just so he could be the one to help.

Yuuri took a deep breath, and built up the momentum required for the jump. In the air, he focused entirely on how he would land. Through the rotations, he watched as the ice got closer and closer…

"Great job!" Viktor cheered. There was also a supportive yell from Phichit in the background. Yuuri smiled. I did it!

He was a little out of breath. Doing so many jumps, good stamina or not, was tiring even though most of them were failed. Noticing his fatigue, Viktor suggested that they should take a break on the bleachers for a little while, which Yuuri was very grateful for.

"You relearned that jump very quickly, Yuuri. I thought it would have taken longer."

Though is was a compliment, it only added to Yuuri's insecurities. Is that what Viktor expected of him? Would he ever skate anywhere near as well as Viktor?

Yuuri muttered "Thanks" with a forced smile, and looked down to his skates. They sat there for a while longer, without much conversation. He couldn't imagine how awkward it would be if that's what the rest of the year would be like.

"Okay, break time's over!" Viktor stood up and walked back to the ice. "We can't sit around all day, right?"

Yuuri nodded and followed. Hopefully he wouldn't have to practice the quads again.

"I think it's time that we start with the real choreography though, don't you?" Viktor asked him. He skated out to the end of the ice. The other club members in the area seemed to move more towards the middle to give him space. "Watch this, okay?"

Leaning on the rink wall, Yuuri watched as Viktor started the routine. It fits perfectly with the music… but it's still nothing like me, Yuuri thought with a sigh. Would Viktor ever really realize that? Something in Yuuri doubted it.

The further into the routine Viktor got, the more he came to realize the difficulty of it. This is all for a recreational show? This looks like it came straight out of the Grand Prix Final! How could I ever do this?

Why Viktor had put so much effort into choreographing such a routine? He had it all planned out already… Yuuri hadn't even begun to think about what he could do for Viktor's performance. Whatever it was, it would look trashy no matter how well Viktor skated it compared to what was planned for him.

"So, Yuuri, what do you think?" Viktor said at the end, tired but smiling.

Yuuri wasn't sure what to say. After a moment, he stammered, "I- do you think I can actually do this?"

"Of course."

Yuuri only wished he could think that himself, but he'd try his hardest. I bet if I'd gotten anybody else as a partner, even Chris, god forbid, I wouldn't have been given a program anywhere near as difficult as this one. Yuuri thought, accepting that in the end, he would have to skate it anyways. It was kind of exciting, in a way, though he wouldn't be thinking that whenever he needed to practice the toe loop again. He dreaded the thought of continuing to practice the quad, even though he knew it was inevitable.

"Anyways!" Viktor said, nonchalantly. "Have you given mine much thought?"

As if Viktor had read his mind, Yuuri wasn't only nervous about completing his own program, having to choreograph one that Viktor would like was its own beast.

Viktor glided over to Yuuri while the other students began filling the middle of the rink again, shaking their heads out of awe and perhaps a little bit of jealousy.

"I'm still working on it." Yuuri replied, too ashamed to admit that he hadn't thought of anything.

"Don't worry, we have plenty of time to get everything started and ready." Viktor laughed. "After all, the show's at the end of the year."

Yuuri nodded. "Mhm." But he knew he'd still need to start working on Viktor's routine soon. But how was he supposed to come up with a good enough performance to match what was made for him?

"Alright, Yuuri, impress me." Viktor said as his partner walked out onto the ice.

Yuuri let out a bewildered "What? What do you mean?" as he stared confused at his partner.

"I don't expect you to have remembered it all, but I want to see how much of a grasp you have on your routine." Viktor answered. What did he think I meant? He wondered.

Yuuri reluctantly skated out to the the middle, and started to begin the routine. The arm movements weren't the same as what Viktor had done earlier, but he couldn't be surprised. Viktor had doubted he would have remembered anything at all if he had only seen a combination once, but was still curious to see what he'd recall.

Yuuri seemed to remember an amazing amount of the choreography, with only a sprinkle of falters and missed timing. It was surprising how well he had done it. Almost every movement Yuuri made was right. However, Viktor did sense a problem with how Yuuri was skating- there was no strong emotion to hold up his performance… there was still no eros.

Viktor continued to notice yet another factor bringing his partner down: Yuuri was incredibly insecure during the entire song. As Yuuri brought the routine to a close, Viktor could see the embarrassment on his face. Why?

"Great job, Yuuri!" Viktor smiled as Yuuri skated over to the wall.

"Thanks."

Hoping to make conversation through the wall of silence Yuuri seemingly put up, Viktor said, "You know, I've realized a few things with your skating."

Yuuri looked up at him. "What do you mean?"

"Well, you seem to be particularly talented in your step sequences, and I definitely can see the amount of energy you've built up. And of course I can't imagine how amazing it was that you could remember the so much of the routine after only seeing it once! We can definitely play off your strengths for the performance."

Yuuri thought for a moment. "You sound a lot like a coach right now, you know."

"Yeah, I guess I do." Viktor laughed. "Anyway, why don't we go through the steps?" Yuuri agreed quickly, with only just a nod for a response.

He learned quickly, as Viktor had expected. He did well on the toe loop after barely just relearning it, and especially shined on the step sequences as Viktor had noticed before. Of course, as good as the level he had set it to be on was, Viktor knew he would eventually have to increase the difficulty- after all, Yuuri could improve. He just needed someone who cared to help him out.

"So, how do you feel?" Viktor asked as the club ended. They walked out the door together to the dorms.

"Alright, I guess. I still can't see myself in the music, though." His partner admitted. Of course, Viktor thought, I still need to find out how he can put himself into the performance.

Viktor wondered how, though. It didn't seem like finding his eros would come easy to Yuuri. After all, the had little experience with romance, which the performance was clearly centered on. "Yuuri, I do have one request."

"Huh?"

"I want you to think about how you can find your eros. I can't find yours for you." Viktor said, trying to put as much meaning into his words as he could. After all, this was really something Yuuri needed to realize for the entire routine to have a strong enough meaning for him to find out his strength on the ice.

Yuuri's face went a bit red. "I don't think I have it." He finally admitted, and looked down.

"Of course you do! Just think about if there's ever been something- someone, perhaps- that's had that kind of effect on you. Something that makes you lose the ability to make rational decisions… something that-"

Yuuri interrupted him, quickly saying "I know, I know... I'll think about it, okay?."

"Alright!" Viktor said cheerfully, "tell me when you think you've found out what it is!" And with that, they parted ways. Yuuri went to his room on the third floor, and Viktor continued up to the fourth.

I wonder what he'll think of. Viktor sat down on his bed, trying to come up with any answer Yuuri might come up with. He knew Yuuri had some sort of eros somewhere, but it was only a thing the junior could find for himself.

But perhaps Viktor would have to play a role in Yuuri discovering this. Would he have to show him eros of his own?

Whatever the case, he knew he'd have to help somehow. Maybe just by supporting, or maybe being something more than just a partner in the ice skating club. But for now, he'd see how far Yuuri would get on his own.

"I know you can do it, Yuuri." He whispered aloud to nothing, somehow hoping Yuuri could hear, "But you need to find that out for yourself as well."