October 2004

Takes place the day after Chapter 5

Jack awoke a few minutes before his alarm for the day went off, his body clock trained to wake him up at the right time each morning. Instead of getting out of bed straight away as he usually did, he took a moment to simply lay in bed feeling happiness and excitement wash over him all again. Jack couldn't remember the last time he woke up feeling like this and knew that it was all due to that incredible kiss he had shared last night with an amazing, beautiful woman, a moment that he kept replaying in his mind as well as the long awaited confirmation that she liked him as much as he liked her, or so he concluded from the tender but passionate way she had kissed him last night.

Despite the happiness, Jack of course hadn't forgotten about the numerous obstacles between Audrey and himself and wondered if Audrey had really thought them through before she kissed him. Jack had suspected that Audrey had feelings for him for a couple of months now but had decided that despite that, he was still in no position to initiate anything with his still married colleague and boss' daughter. Jack had told himself that if Audrey initiated something, that could change things but he had never really believed that she would. As suspected, the kiss had changed everything for him. The kiss had felt so right, so natural, simply perfect and had only heightened his feelings for her. Now that their feelings for each other were out in the open, Jack was hopeful that they could make it work.

Jack at least would be willing to talk about things and find ways to get around the obstacles between them if it meant being with Audrey and he hoped that Audrey shared that desire. Jack knew Audrey well enough by now to assume that she wouldn't have randomly or easily decided to kiss him unless she had thought it out and was confident in her feelings and likely outcome of her decision but he knew that he couldn't just assume that and would need to speak with her about all of this. There was a lot to talk about but Jack remained wearily hopeful. Jack also knew that getting over Audrey would be a million times more difficult than it had been now that he knew she liked him and Jack was sure that any further attempts at getting over her would be near pointless. Jack hoped that the outcome of their conversation wouldn't result in that. Jack quickly got himself ready for the day and headed downstairs to the meeting room, wondering if Audrey would already be up and working at this early hour.

As Jack entered the meeting room downstairs he couldn't help but smile when he saw Audrey. If it was possible, he found himself thinking that she looked more beautiful than ever. Jack said "Good Morning" as he walked over to her. Audrey replied with "Morning" and returned his smile, neither of them able to hide their happiness after last night. Things were off to as good of a start as Jack could have hoped for.

Jack sat down in the seat closest to Audrey and softly said "I know we're busy today but let's talk later".

Audrey replied with "I agree, sounds good" but as she said the words, found herself hoping that she hadn't misunderstood and that Jack didn't want to talk because he regretted what happened between them. It didn't look like he regretted it but Audrey couldn't help but feel insecure for a moment. "Do you regret what happened last night?" Audrey asked gently.

Jack had seen Audrey's expression change from the same happiness he was expressing to nervousness. As soon as she asked him her question, he answered with a firm "No". Jack let his hand come to rest on Audrey's knee. Audrey smiled at this so Jack let his hand remain there, rubbing her knee gently. Jack met Audrey's eyes with a warmth that Audrey hadn't quite seen before and added "Not at all, not unless you do. I just think we should talk".

Audrey sighed with relief and moved her hand down to hold Jack's hand that had been tenderly touching her. Audrey said "Good. I don't regret it either. Let's talk this evening".

Jack simply said "Ok". They took a moment to enjoy their close contact. Satisfied for now with how they were leaving things between them, Jack disengaged from Audrey and scooted down the table a little before starting his own work for the day.

As expected, their day was very busy. Jack and Audrey attended a few final meetings in the morning and flew back to Washington D.C. after lunch. They had been able to get a lot of work done on the plane but still had to head back to the office to complete a final few hours of work in order to wrap up after their time in Chicago and brief the Secretary of Defence on the meetings that they attended earlier that day. Jack and Audrey kept professional and friendly throughout the day, as they always had and both did their best to block any personal thoughts about each other for the time being.

James left the office at around seven o'clock and popped into Audrey's office on his way out to tell her to head home soon after such a busy week and enjoy her weekend. Audrey then heard her father walk a bit further down the hall and tell Jack something similar. Not long after, Audrey reached a point where most of her work was finished and her less urgent tasks that she hadn't got to yet could be left for Monday. Audrey then walked down the hall and into Jack's office.

"Hey" Audrey said in a sweet tone laced with something that Jack hadn't quite heard in her voice before, excitement maybe or affection. He wasn't sure but he liked it.

"Hey" Jack replied with a smile.

"Almost done?" Audrey asked.

"Yeah, more or less. The rest can wait until Monday. You?" Jack replied.

"Same" Audrey said, smiling at him.

Jack pushed back from his desk a little and turned his whole attention to Audrey. "So" Jack said, unsure exactly what to say but still smiling at her.

"Let's not talk here" Audrey said as she looked around the office. She followed with "Do you have any plans tonight?"

"No."

"Want to go and get a drink?"

"I would love to."

"Good. I'll get my things and then let's go" Audrey said before turning and heading out of Jack's office.

A couple of minutes later Audrey reappeared at Jack's office door with her coat on, holding her handbag and ready to leave the office. Jack had already shut his computer down and stood up to put his coat on and grab his briefcase. Jack felt that happy feeling again, feeling lucky to be leaving the office with Audrey and on his way to spend the evening with her. Jack walked towards Audrey, turning the lights off and closing his office door on his way. As he reached Audrey he let his hand rest on her lower back for a moment. Their bodies were close and they smiled at each other before they walked towards the elevator and made their way out of the office.

There were plenty of bars and restaurants a short walk from the office and Jack and Audrey found a place that Audrey said she had been to a few times and liked. It was a small wine bar and restaurant that was beautiful but relaxed and not too crowded or noisy. Jack and Audrey took a table inside by a window, in a little nook that gave them the privacy they wanted. The restaurant was warm, cosy and the lights were dimmed. They had a nice view of the street filled with lots of people walking by enjoying their Friday night and other diners sitting outside, eating and drinking by the warmth and glow of the outdoor heaters. Both Jack and Audrey were happy to finally be on a date together, each of them gazing across the table at each other and the restaurant provided them with the perfect atmosphere for their evening, beautiful, comfortable but romantic all at the same time.

The waiter took their order, Jack ordering beer and Audrey a glass of wine to begin with. Jack and Audrey spoke comfortably about their usual topics until their drinks came. Once arrived and they had taken a sip, they looked at each other, ready to talk but neither quite sure where to begin.

Jack thought that he should jump in and say something. He was nervous. As much as he wanted this with Audrey and as much as he had let himself give into that want and imagine possibilities over the last day, there was a lot between them to discuss and figure out. Jack wished that he and Audrey could just go on a normal first date but given the situation between them, they both knew this conversation needed to be had before anything further happened. Jack thought that if Audrey had been brave enough to kiss him last night then he could start this conversation. Jack worked up the courage to start and simply said "So, like I said, I had been wanting to kiss you for a long time and don't regret last night at all. I like you a lot Audrey".

Audrey smiled and blushed a little, reaching across the table to hold Jack's hand. He gave her hand a little squeeze and she replied "I really like you too Jack and have for a while". They both smiled wider and a little more sheepishly at each other as she admitted this. "I tried to get over my feelings for you because we work together among other complications but I wasn't able to. I'm happy that we kissed last night and that we're having this conversation now".

"I had a similar experience with trying to get over my feelings for you" Jack said and they laughed softly. "But things are complicated which is why I never acted on my feelings for you, no matter how much I wanted to" Jack continued.

"Complicated as in this can't happen or complicated as in if we talk about things, you would be willing to give us a chance?"

"I wouldn't have kissed you back or be sitting here if I wasn't willing to give us a chance. My feelings for you aren't complicated and I think we could make this work if we talk about things and go slowly. Are you willing to give us a chance?"

"Yes" Audrey replied. Audrey could see Jack struggling to get his next words out. It was her turn to squeeze his hand, encouraging him to say what he wanted to say.

"Look Audrey, I'm going to be completely honest with you. I want nothing more than to be in a happy and loving relationship with someone I care about. My wife Teri died over five years ago and I'm ready to move on, I have been for a while but it's still difficult. I've had women express interest and dated a little over the years but nothing serious. I guess I wasn't ready or I hadn't met the right person, I don't really know. I haven't had the easiest life and then with what happened to Teri on top of it, despite wanting a relationship I haven't been interested dating someone I don't trust or feel connected to. I owe it to Teri if not myself to pursue a relationship with someone special. I always thought that when I met that person, it would just feel right and I have been happy to wait for that to happen".

Audrey was touched by the way Jack was opening up to her. It was obviously difficult for him to say all of this and she was honoured that Jack was trusting her. Audrey kept looking into Jack's eyes and gently rubbed circles his hand with her thumb, encouraging him to continue. "I can't promise that I'd be easy to date or be in a relationship with if that's where we end up. I struggle with opening up to people on a deeper level. I didn't even do that with my wife and I have only had more struggles since then. I don't know what lies ahead for me despite how I feel about you, my intentions and what I ultimately want. I trust you and care about you and I would like to give this a chance, to date you with the best of intentions provided that's also what you want. If it's not, that's okay. I just think you should know up front that I have some things I'm working through and that I have things that I'll always be working through. This might not be as easy as you might think or as much as you or I would like to hope".

Audrey took a moment to process everything Jack had said. Not all of it was news to her as she thought she had come to know and understand Jack if only a little over the last six months. If anything, his openness and vulnerability had only made her feel more drawn to him. Audrey wanted to put him at ease and felt it was fair that she opened up to him too. "I appreciate you sharing that with me. It doesn't change the way I feel about you though or change the fact that I want to date you too, also with the best of intentions". Jack and Audrey quietly laughed, as she had purposely copied what he said about intentions. Audrey then said "I really like you Jack and we can take things slow, no pressure".

Audrey's response was everything Jack had wanted to hear. He thought that his spiel might have changed her mind but given Audrey's knowledge of his previous job both from her professional experience and small things Jack had said to her over the last six months paired with her simply already knowing him as a colleague and friend, she probably anticipated some of those issues anyway.

Audrey continued talking "I'm feeling pretty vulnerable at this point in my life too. I just ended my marriage and I was very unhappy in that marriage for a long time before it ended. Even though I'm happy with the decision to separate and know that it's the right thing for me, it's still scary to be on my own when I was with the same man for ten years. I was only twenty five when we got together which seems so young looking back on it and I barely remember how to date. Until the last few months or so I never thought I'd be dating again in my life. I don't know if I should try to be single for a certain amount of time. I don't really know anything about navigating this part of my life but what I do know is that I like you and feel something between us. It seems like you feel the same and we'll work through whatever issues either of us have".

Audrey saw Jack avert his eyes a little and slowly said "Audrey, I know you're separated but I was separated once. I started seeing someone amid my separation and deeply regretted it when my wife and I got back together. I don't want you to have that same regret."

"Jack, stop."

Jack looked back to Audrey, not saying anything.

"Did you love your wife at the time?" Audrey asked.

"Yes."

"Well that's the difference. I don't love Paul anymore. I don't hate him either, our marriage just stopped working and we fell out of love. This isn't the time or place to get into all the negative things that happened between us. I guess there is always time to talk further in the future if you want to hear more but believe me when I say that my marriage is over." Audrey tilted her head and moved her hand, now caressing Jack's wrist and forearm as she said "This seems right. I want to give us a chance".

"Ok. Me too." Jack said as he smiled, seeming to accept her statement as he enjoyed Audrey's touch.

"What about work?" Jack asked.

"Well" Audrey started.

"And your dad?" Jack interjected with a laugh.

Audrey laughed too and continued "Let's obviously keep it strictly professional at work, like it has always been. Outside of work, we'll start slow with no pressure. We can just start by spending some time together. I don't want to ruin our working relationship but this is worth taking a chance on for me. Besides, if we go slow and keep communicating, if we find that we don't work out like we thought, we can end it and be mature adults and continue to work together as we always did. On the other hand though, if it works out great, which I hope it does and think it might, there is still no loss in going slow and I'm sure that in the future, we'd only be happier and more confident in our relationship because of it".

Jack smiled and said "I agree. That sounds good. This is worth taking a chance on for me too. I wouldn't be risking dating a colleague let alone the boss' daughter if I didn't like you a lot and see us working together."

Audrey laughed and said "Yeah, sorry about being the boss' daughter".

Jack smiled and said "It's ok. I guess my life was missing some of the riskiness it used to have. This might help satisfy that need". Jack was only half joking but they both smiled at his comment.

Audrey started speaking, seeming unsure of herself "Sorry if that was too much for you or sounded too long term. I'm definitely not pushing us into anything or trying to make any grand plans."

It was Jack's turn to tell Audrey to stop talking this time and said "It's ok. I agree. It's awkward to discuss and make decisions like this on the first date but we both know that given our circumstances, we needed to talk about these things before we start dating."

Audrey smiled and said "Yeah, it hasn't been that awkward though has it?"

"No" Jack laughed.

They were quiet for a moment, each thinking maybe this conversation was over before Jack said "And we won't breathe a word of this to your dad."

Audrey replied "Oh absolutely not."

"What if he finds out?"

"Why would he, we'll keep professional at work."

"You never know, he or someone else could see something or pick up on something, even outside of work. Unless you want to date completely in secret… You never know, things happen."

"I don't want to date in secret, I just want to keep it from my dad" Audrey said, taking a moment to look into Jack's eyes. "Dad wouldn't approve me dating anyone whilst I'm still technically married but it isn't up to him and I don't think we're doing anything wrong. Obviously it wouldn't be ideal if he found out but if we're discrete I think the chances of that happening are low. I'm prepared to deal with it if it happens though. I'm sure we could work it out together if he found out and dad thinks highly of you anyway, I think he'd get over it quickly enough".

Jack nodded and said "Ok".

"Ok."

"You're sure?"

"Yes, you?"

"Yes."

Jack and Audrey unravelled their hands and returned to their drinks, smiling softly at each other. Although the conversation had been a little awkward, both Jack and Audrey were relieved that their feelings were out there, happy that the other felt the same way about them and confident in their plan moving forwards. It felt good to know how the other felt and their intentions which was almost never clear when two people started to date. Jack and Audrey ordered dinner and the mood relaxed again as they ate, they smiled and talked easily throughout dinner, with a few comfortable quiet moments here and there. Even though the mood had settled after their conversation, it still didn't feel quite like a first date. Obviously it helped that they had known each other for six months and had been able to build a not only a strong working relationship but a friendship over that time. Jack and Audrey already knew each other, liked and trusted each other, felt comfortable with each other and were happy to open up to each other at least on some level making their date feel like they were getting to know a friend more intimately rather than feeling like they were on a romantic job interview as many first dates could feel like.

After dinner the dessert menu arrived and Audrey feigned seriousness when they looked at menu, telling Jack that there was something important that she needed to tell him. That thing happened to be that she really loved ordering dessert and really loved chocolate. Jack had laughed at this, a real and genuine laugh. Audrey was beautiful and funny and even animated in this setting and it felt so good to be with her like this. Audrey realised that she had never seen Jack laugh like that before. He had of course smiled and laughed with her before but it was always subtle, soft. She smiled at him and said "You have a great laugh. You should laugh more".

Jack smiled back at her and said "You might have to make me laugh".

Audrey replied "I can try to do that", the affection in her eyes making Jack feel wanted and cared for in a way he hadn't felt in a long time.

A couple of hours seemed to pass quickly and before they knew it, they were finishing coffee and sharing dessert which of course had featured chocolate. Jack paid the bill and Audrey didn't make a fuss about paying. She simply thanked Jack for dinner, knowing that he wouldn't let her pay anyway and knowing that she'd have a chance to make it up to him along the way, anticipating many more dates like this one.

Jack and Audrey walked back to the office carpark together, the pleasure of each other's company even in such a small, insignificant moment not lost on either of them. As they were walking, Audrey moved closer to Jack and for a couple of seconds wrapped her hand around his arm as she tipped her head against his shoulder and said "I'm glad we're doing this". As she let him go, Jack rubbed her back and said "Same". They tilted their heads to look into each other's eyes, their gaze confirming how happy they were.

Once they got to Audrey's car, Jack of course walking her there, they turned to face each other. Jack stepped close to Audrey and brought his hands up to frame her face, gently letting his fingers trace the outline of her cheeks and jaw. Audrey placed one of her hands tenderly on Jack's chest and let the back of her fingers caress the side of his face like he was doing to her. They smiled at each other before Jack's hands moved slightly backwards so that his fingertips rested in Audrey's hair and he leant in and softly kissed her. Just like the previous night, they kissed for a few moments, the passion between them growing by the second. The kiss felt as good as it did the previous night, maybe even better now that there was no hesitancy or question between them. Audrey thought that she could stand there kissing Jack forever, savouring the closeness of his body and his lips against hers. Jack was still struggling to shake the surreal, dreamlike feeling he had kissing Audrey, her touch and kiss being more amazing than he had dreamed of and even exceeding his memories of their kiss a mere day ago. It has been a long time since either felt so wanted and it felt so good to feel desired by each other in the moment.

Jack and Audrey pulled apart from their kiss to say good night to each other. Jack asked Audrey if he could see her over the weekend and Audrey happily said "Of course, I'd like that". Audrey said that she'd call Jack on Saturday after they finally had some well needed sleep.

Before they let go of each other they shared one more gentle kiss and Jack then tenderly kissed Audrey's cheek which somehow made her heart flutter as much as their previous, more passionate kiss had and she let her lips curl into a smile at this.

Jack had felt happy the whole drive home and when he entered his apartment collapsed onto the lounge to smile to himself and think for a moment. In only a matter of days, everything that Jack had hoped for but never dreamed would happen had actually happened. Jack had been telling the raw truth when he told Audrey that he wanted nothing more than to be in a happy and loving relationship with someone he cared about. Over the last few years Jack had witnessed people around him with loving partners, desperately craving the same but the impossibilities of his job plus his own personal reasons had made it impossible for him. Jack had prioritised work whilst letting his personal life crash and burn and had hoped that moving to Washington D.C. would put him in a position where having a relationship could be a reality. Jack liked and cared about Audrey more than he could explain and he was so happy that he was taking this step with her. She was beautiful, kind, funny, smart and understood him. Jack couldn't want anything else. Although it was only early, Audrey was amazing and made Jack feel everything he needed to feel to know that she could be the right person for him and that there was potential for this to be something deep and real.

Jack was also happy that Audrey was willing to take this slowly, for him and for herself. Jack knew that he had a long way to go in terms of himself as a person and himself in a relationship and still had doubts about whether he could really open up to someone or love someone the way he had loved Teri but Jack desperately wanted to try. Audrey hadn't seemed bothered when Jack touched on some of his issues. She was aware of them and seemed ready and happy to walk down this path with him. Jack hoped and was quietly confident that their dating would or could turn into a relationship in the future and that they would be able to have a real, loving relationship where he was able to make Audrey happy.

A few days ago Jack had left his apartment lonely with unrelenting infatuation and hopes of a relationship that would likely never come to be and now he returned home after being on two dates with Audrey, getting to kiss her, hold her, smile and make her smile and turns out that she wanted everything he did too. It was only early days but Jack knew that he and Audrey really liked each other and saw this working out, they wouldn't be in this position where they were risking it all if they didn't. Jack couldn't help but smile and have hopeful heart at everything that the future could and hopefully would hold. For the first time in a long time, Jack felt truly content, hopeful and even happy thinking about his life and what was to come.