Chapter 6 – Spaghetti Bolognaise Is Italian

"Seriously this is not a good idea!"

"What's the matter? Scared?" Ianto taunted Jack as they walked along the quay side to the restaurant.

"No, I just don't want to make a fool out of you!"

Ianto laughed. "Since when did you care about that?"

"I'm not going to dignify that with an answer; you know I don't want you to look stupid!"

"I know…" He smiled, giving Jack a peck on the cheek. "So where are you taking me?"

"That would be telling!" Jack smirked.

"If you're taking me to McDonalds again…" Ianto threatened.

"That was April Fools Day! You know that was a joke."

"Well now you tell me!" He replied sarcastically.

"In here…" Jack turned the corner into the restaurant.

"Pizza Hut!" Ianto laughed. "Real smooth, Jack… pizza is hardly the most romantic meal."

"They sell pasta dishes too!" Jack retorted. "You know… pasta hut…"

"How may I help you sir?" The hostess interrupted.

"Table for two, it'll be under Harkness… Jack Harkness."

"Yes, here we are… if you'd like to come with me gentlemen." She took them to a table outside, looking out over the quay.

"Well on the upside you chose a good table!"

"So I'm not a complete failure?"

"No."

"Not yet anyway… trust me it'll get worse."

"What do you fancy then?" Ianto browsed through the menu as he spoke. "I was thinking… the cheese linguine."

"Spaghetti Bolognaise!" He announced. "Love the English and their traditional foods!"

"Jack… Spaghetti Bolognaise is Italian… just like everything else here."

"Oh yeah!"

The waitress came over, taking their orders and drink orders to the kitchen, before long she reappeared with their drinks, and a short while later brought their food over.

"Bon Appétit!" The waitress left, going to serve another customer.

"Isn't that French?"

"Yes Jack…" Ianto answered patronisingly.

"But… this is an Italian restaurant…?"

"Yes Jack… have you taken something? Retcon maybe? Messed with your mind?"

"No!" Jack protested. "Just been desperately trying not to embarrass you… not working mind you."

"It's fine!" Ianto shrugged it off, doing his best not to laugh as Jack dropped some spaghetti down his shirt. "You had to wear a white shirt didn't you?!"

"Sorry… I'll go and clean up… be back in a…" He quickly stood up, backing into a waiter and ending up on the floor, covered in food. "Oh God! I'm so sorry!" He got up, brushing some of the pizza off him, and running off to the toilets.

Ianto was still laughing when he came back, covered in tomato sauce. "Told you this was a bad idea!" He cringed. "Look can we just go now…"

"Sure… and don't worry about it; I had fun." Jack paid, and they left the restaurant, everyone staring at them as they did so.

"You know we still need to rent out that movie…"

"You have to be kidding!" Jack exclaimed. "Haven't I made enough of a fool of my self today?!"

"Not nearly enough…" He grinned. "Come on." He dragged Jack along to the shop, picking out an especially 'girly' film.

"Legally Blonde!" Ianto took it off the shelf, handing it to Jack.

"Do you have to yell? Everyone's already staring at me!" He almost whispered.

"Your humiliation is not over yet!"

"Lets rent Die Hard… please!" He shoved the DVD back at Ianto.

"Nah uh! I thought you were being nice to me today!" Ianto objected, a cheeky grin on his face.

"I'm always nice to you!" Jack retaliated.

"Then rent this!" He thrust the DVD back into his hand, smiling as Jack relented, going to pay for it.

"Happy now?" Jack pulled a pouty face at Ianto.

"Yup… perfectly happy."

"Good… can we go now?!"

"Sure!" He smiled out the pouty look still on Jack's face. "Come here you." Ianto kissed him. "We can go home now if you want…"

"Finally!" Jack grinned.

A/N: Tada! Update! This is to celebrate me finally getting my braces out! And my book getting uploaded... Review please, make my day even more fantabulous!