AUTHOR'S NOTES: There is a small extra scene for this one as well. It is also worth noting that not all of the characters got their nationalities switched around.

CHAPTER 6: The King of Omashu

"So one thing's certain," Toph commented as they flew, "either the Northern Water Tribe has been smoking something really strong lately, or there's something about their relationship with the rest of the world that I have no idea about."

"It wouldn't be the first time something simple confused you," Zuko joked.

"At least I didn't get my face frozen from slapping my face onto a slab of ice," Toph countered.

"Now you're just making assumptions," Zuko defended, "or do I need to get on about how we're still too beautiful to die?"

"Fine," Toph scowled, "rub it in, damn waterbender."

"If you know what I mean…" Zuko winked, his hands migrating down Toph's back.

"It is kind of shameless the way you two flirt," Aang laughed, and suddenly both Zuko's and Toph's face turned red. Even Zuko's blue scar took on a bit of different color, and the redness of Toph's face was visible behind her Kyoshi Warrior makeup. Maybe it was because Aang turned around right when Zuko started groping Toph's butt, but whatever the case, it turned awkward fast.

"Yeah," Zuko shrugged, "I'll pretend I didn't hear about that."

"Pon Farr is more than just a game, Zuko; Toph" Aang informed them, "and it's not restricted to the Air Nomad Society either."

He didn't wait for them to respond, but instead turned back around.

"Damn," Zuko whispered to Toph, "I don't think we give Aang as much credit as he deserves."

"Well, hopefully he's right about this whole 'better vacation' thing then." Toph snarked.

"Hey," Aang chipped in without even turning around, "I'm the Avatar. Disappointing people is something I only do when I get ragingly drunk and freeze myself in a block of ice like a total idiot. By the way, I totally said I was sorry for that, too."

"Well," Zuko agreed, "you did help us defend the Southern Water Tribe from Azula, and matched Xilingshi in skill and style while you did it. That's definitely a good mark on your name."

"And now you're hopefully taking us on an awesome vacation," Toph added.

"Well, we're coming right up to Omashu," Aang indicated, pointing to a large Earth Kingdom city." there might be a few Air Warriors here though, so let's be careful."

They landed a ways away from the main gate, and surveyed the city. There were definitely Air Warriors here, but if anything, they seemed to mostly be just minding their own business.
"So do you think we need to take any measures against the guards?" Toph asked, "Or do we get to simply waltz into Omashu."

"One does not simply walk into Omashu," Aang warned, "there's a gate and some guards from the looks of it, but getting past them should be a breeze."

They were not the only ones trying to get in though. As they approached the gate, they noticed a cabbage merchant who was halted, and his wares inspected.

"What's this, cabbages?" the guard exclaimed, "we only allow REAL food in Omashu—like pot roast… and beef jerky!"

With a stamp of his foot, he launched the cart of cabbages away and into the chasm below.

"MY CABBAGES!" was the last they heard of the merchant, and the three benders calmly approached the guards. The guards took a certain interest in Aang.

"It's been a while since we've seen a proper Air Nomad," he mentioned.

"Surely Omashu hasn't sided with them, have they?" Zuko frowned.

"Some folks have," the guards warned, "but most of the Air Warriors here will leave you alone as long as you leave them alone or mention anything that even sounds like conspiracy. The king of the city is still an Earth Kingdomer, but the few Air Warriors that do roam these streets should not be crossed."

"I take it they know someone who knows someone who knows someone?" Toph asked.

"That's something of how it works. Granted, we're not about to become isolationist and accuse everyone who crosses our gates of being affiliated with the Air Warriors. I do, nevertheless, have to ask you three your names."

"My name is Ong," Aang lied, swinging his arms slowly as if he was about to start dancing. Toph and the guard looked at him skeptically, but he caught Zuko's eye, and Zuko understood what Aang was doing.

"You'll have to excuse him," Zuko apologized, "he's not all there ever since the last raid down south. Anyways, I am Zuko of the Southern Water Tribe, and this is Toph, a Western refugee."

"You might want to keep a close eye on your friend Ong then," the guards warned as they used bending to open the gates, "people have gotten arrested for doing less, but that's only IF they get caught. Avoid the Air Warriors, and there should be no problem."

"Got it," Zuko nodded, and the three entered the city. Once the guards closed the gates, Aang stopped swinging his arms, and regained his posture. Even if Toph had been in her Fire Nation getup it would not have been seen as not seen as too unusual. There were plenty of Fire Nation wanderers; just none except one that was a bender.

"So what the hell was that all about?" Toph raised an eyebrow.

"I didn't think I should go telling them that I was Aang, let alone the Avatar. Ong was just the first name that came to my head. Don't ask how I came up with it."

"How did you come up with it," Toph smirked. Zuko smacked his forehead with his hand.

"I was kind of asking for that one, Zuko." Aang fake-sighed. "It was just a weird dream I had a couple nights ago, Toph. I dreamed I was with two waterbenders, one named K'Tarah, and the other named Sohka. They called me Ong. I still shudder when I think of it… there was so much ponytail… and that girl cried over EVERYTHING."

There was a moment of awkward silence, but then Aang continued.

"Hey, you asked," He remarked, "but anyways, look around you. What do you see?"

"I see a bunch of stone cars," Toph observed, "I take it you're hinting at something."

"Me and an old friend of mine named Bumi used to ride those things all the time. You can't say you've been to Omashu until you've ridden 'em too!"

"Uh, three things," Toph interjected.

"Yeah?"

"First, who is Bumi, and was this guy as crazy or as studly as you are?"

Aang laughed. "Bumi was insane; crazy—he was a mad genius, as I liked to call him. He was also one of my best friends. He smelled like burnt mushrooms a lot. That… suddenly might explain a few things…"

"Oh, for some reason, I don't doubt that." Toph commented, rolling her eyes.

"That's fine," Aang shrugged, "So, what else did you want?"

"I've been racing at breakneck speeds before, and I've gotta tell you, it really doesn't do it for me."

She clutched her stomach, as if even the thought of racing through the wind at high speeds was about to make her feel sick.

"Oh, it's nothing like being on a glider, if that's what you're thinking." Aang reassured her, and then winked at Zuko. "Though I'm not sure how you'd know that… Come on, it'll be fun!"

Toph tried turning to Zuko for support, but Zuko supported Aang's idea—to him it sounded like a good way to unwind, especially after the incidents at Kyoshi Island.

A few minutes later, they were racing down the mail chutes at breakneck speeds. Aang and Zuko were enjoying themselves, sometimes even waving their arms in the air and laughing. Toph looked positively green, and her eyes were out of focus.

"You know how you said it wouldn't be anything like gliding," Toph muttered groggily after their 5th ride, "well, you're right. It's faster, and its worse. Where are we, anyway?"

"We're at the top of the city." Aang laughed as Toph was helped into the car by Zuko. They seemed to enjoy making Toph suffer—but more accurately they were just enjoying the ride.

The ride from here was the longest and fastest—as well as the most intense—one yet. Several chutes joined theirs, and sometimes they branched off in different directions. It was not considered intense until after a cart full of spears slid up right behind them, and its weight was greater than theirs, so it was coming at them faster than they were getting away from it

"Aang, got any ideas on how this will NOT end in imminent death for us?" Zuko shouted,

"Just one," Aang replied, and he rocked the cart enough that they slid off, ramped over several houses, smashed a few things, and wound up coming to a stop after a precise and well-aimed collision with a cart adjacent to a cart of cabbage. The Cabbage Merchant looked relieved. However, as the trio stumbled out of the cart Toph dizzily spun around and fell flat on her face. It made her launch a huge fireball in the direction of the wooden cart, which immediately caught fire.

"MY CABBAGES!" he wailed, but it was not him that they paid attention to—it was the guards that surrounded them almost instantly. Luckily, none of them appeared to be Air Warriors.

Zuko glared at Aang as they were surrounded by the guards.

"Okay, so maybe this WASN'T a good idea." Aang confessed. Toph muttered something in a groggy tone that none of them could decipher, but it seemed like she agreed.

"Oh, come on, it can't be that bad," Aang reasoned with Zuko as they were led away. They were not told where they were going.

"2 silver pieces says it can." Zuko offered, and surprisingly, Aang took it.

They wound up in front of the king of the city.

"These youths were caught vandalizing the mail chute system." The guards explained, and the old king leaned forward and looked at the three young adults.

"So," he said, "they went postal?" and Aang laughed. The guards frowned.

"I suppose that is one way to put it, sire." They replied.

"In that case, throw them…" the king declared,

"Get your money ready," Zuko whispered.

"…a feast."

"A feast?"

"yes, a feast."

"Dammit." Zuko swore, as Aang poked Zuko's shoulder and grinned, his hand open for Zuko's silver pieces, which he grudgingly slapped into Aang's waiting palm.

The feast that the king threw them was enjoyable indeed, and after a good night's sleep, they were brought forward again on the king's request. Aang recognized the crazy, lopsided grin as the same grin that his friend Bumi had had, and so he recognized his old friend, even after 100 years, and the two struck up conversation.

"Aang, you should know better," Bumi fake-chastised him, "freezing yourself in an iceberg is not a very good way to learn your world history."

"I know, I know," Aang lowered his head but keeping his joking tone, "I pahtied too hard, and did not listen to Monk Gyatso's Warning. He told me specifically that if I was ever caught in a storm, that I should not freeze myself in a block of ice like a complete idiot."

"You certainly screwed the pooch on that one!" Bumi snorted, and Aang laughed.

"So," Aang changed the subject, "tell me a little bit about Omashu."

"I can tell you a lot of things about Omashu," Bumi laughed, "but you have to ask correctly."

"Please?"

"Ah yes, Omashu. You should have been here a while back when Sokka and Katara were here. They were an interesting pair. Katara was hard not to notice, as all benders are pretty easy to spot."

"Who's Katara?"

"She was a powerful earthbending master," Bumi grinned, "I even taught her a few things, and then she taught me some things! I thought she was crazy for a moment!"

"Bumi, I hate to say it, but I think you're the only crazy one in the situation."

"That was the same thought that came to my mind, Aang. Nevertheless, apparently the Air Warriors took interest in her, because I haven't seen her in two years. And now her brother's gone missing too, and people are disappearing left and right Aang. I think this place is craaaaazy!"

Aang smelled the burnt mushroom smell he remembered smelling around Bumi when they were children. "Bumi," he asked, "who was her brother?"

"Called himself Sokka, he did," Bumi grinned, "but now he ran off too. So sad…"

"So why are you telling me this?" Aang asked, "why do I need to care about Sokka or Katara?"

"Because Aang, sometimes the help you will need is not the help you seek. You need to understand that looking outside of the box and thinking instead like a mad genius, will benefit you greatly."

"So," Zuko commented, "would you care to explain that remark?"

"of course, young waterbender," Bumi cackled, "what I am saying is, is that sometimes the people you thought would be your allies turn out not to be, and people you think are insignificant and unimportant will become your best friends."

"So does that mean you're an enemy?" Aang asked, as Toph grabbed a ring from the table they were sitting at and slid it on.

"It depends on what you think I am an enemy to," Bumi answered, "it does mean that I obviously am not coming on your little Northern Water Tribe adventure, but as long as you don't turn on me, I don't think I'll be able to find a good reason to turn on you."

"so I take it you want us to find this Sokka and Katara?"

"Oh, that might be difficult," Bumi explained, "after all, finding one person in a world full of thousands can be difficult!"

"That's what I told you!" Aang argued,

"And it didn't bother me, because I was thinking like a mad genius," Bumi grinned, his smirk widening as Toph was fighting with a crystal that was covering her right arm. "while I am no Aunt Wu, I can let you know that you will find what you seek—it will not be the way you seek it, but you will find it if you listen to my advice, as crazy as it might be."

"Thanks," Aang smiled, and then his and Zuko's attention was diverted to Toph, who had a blue-green crystal covering her right arm from hand to shoulder."

"I see she found one of my Jemmonite Rings," Bumi cackled, "and that she's learned that it is tasty."

Toph was gnawing on the crystal on her arm, but there was too much of it for her to break it off. Bumi clenched his fist and the crystal shattered. Toph looked back up, her face turning pink beneath her Kyoshi Warrior makeup.

"Yeah, uhh…" Toph stammered, "I… uh… put it on and then… you saw the rest."

"I've got plenty more where that came from," Bumi laughed, "So don't you worry your little painted head over it. What you, the waterbender and the Kyoshi Warrior need to do now is get a good night's sleep tonight and then move on tomorrow. There is no reason to linger around here when there are Air Warriors everywhere."

"On one condition," Aang offered, "tomorrow morning we ride the mail chutes again just like old times."

"Thanks, I'll pass." Toph held up her hand. "I refuse to turn as green as my gear again."

"Suit yourself," Bumi giggle-snorted.

The chamber Bumi reserved for them to sleep in was actually considerably nice. Toph, who had not gotten over the events from earlier, was asleep quickly, and Zuko and Aang soon followed suit.

The next morning, Aang woke up to find that Toph and Zuko were gone. He immiediataely got up and raced to find Bumi. He had suspected that Bumi had taken his friends and would expect some sort of mad challenge to be completed in return for their freedom. However, Bumi's answer shocked him."

"I don't know what you're talking about, Aang." He explained, "I haven't seen them all morning. You might want to check the chamber next to yours though. There were some crazy people in there that weren't exactly dressed. Ha!"

Bumi let out another giggle and a snort, and walked away. Aang returned tohis chamber and realized that most of Zuko and Toph's clothing was still there, but that there was an adjacent chamber to theirs. He went in and found Toph and Zuko, but to his surprise, they were just asleep in one of the beds. Zuko had his pants and undershirt still on, and Toph was still wearing her face paint and the green undershirt from her Kyoshi uniform. They were both soon shockingly awakened. Bumi smashed through one of the walls, cackling madly. Both Toph and Zuko yelped loudly from panic until they realized that had happened.

"Wakey, wakey!" Bumi cackled, "Those carts are not going to ride themselves you know!"

Aang laughed at hearing his old friend's remarks. Toph looked ready to impale herself with the nearest sharp object, which, fortunately for her, were not anywhere in her reach.

"I swear," she muttered sloppily, "gimmie my Kyoshi knives and someone's gonna die."

"You don't have to come, Toph," Zuko reassured her, gently rubbing her back, "but I need to. Aang has a couple of silvers that I need to regain from him."

"So silver is like honor to you now?" Toph asked, "because if regaining silver was like regaining honor, you would have to defeat the avatar to restore your honor."

"But I do have to defeat the avatar," Zuko turned to Aang, "2 more silvers says someone will make a deal out of our next crash."

"Make it 5 and it's a deal."

"Fine, you silver-tongued little bastard."

Aang cackled, and Bumi even wound up making a few bets with Aang and Zuko. Toph cleaned the makeup off her face and got dressed in her Fire Nation getup while the guys were off wreaking havoc. It was not the wreaking havoc that she disliked—just the speed and the motion.

Whatever the case, however, they had fun. The Cabbage Merchant's (new) cart was the destination of one of their carts, causing Zuko to lose another bet to Aang, but to win one from Bumi. Several hours later, many more coins had changed hands, Aang winding up a lot richer, and Zuko a lot poorer—relatively speaking. Bumi evened out his winnings and losses in the end.

"Not a single time beating you, damn you, Aang." He laughed as they returned to the palace to pick up Toph and start packing again, "you've definitely got style…"