Chapter 5 (Amber POV)

I wake to hush talking nearby. I try to listen but I'm too tired to do anything. I then notice that I am moving up and down and that there is a weight on my lower back. My eyes flash open to see nothing but black. I move my head slightly to see that my head was buried in Loki's hair. If I wasn't a wolf pup, I would be blushing right now.

I notice now that I am laying on his chest and that his hand is laying over my body. I want to move to save me from embarrassment but he is so warm and comfortable. I wonder what it would be like to wake like this every morning. I then frown, why am I thinking this? I don't even like Loki, he's a friend. I have never really thought about this until now.

Sure I have warmed up to Jane, Loki and Thor but I thought us only as friends. Now that I think about it, why would Loki like someone like me? I am a monster, I have killed many people and I can't control my werewolf form, I could kill anyone within seconds without knowing.

I finally decide to move so I try wriggling out but I fail. But Loki does move a bit. It doesn't help though, because he moved me so he was hugging me like a toy. Great, I'm a toy now? I hear a low chuckle from somewhere but I can't turn to look. I try wriggling again and Loki stirred a bit.

I watch as he slowly opens his eyes and blinks a couple of times. I nudge him a bit to let him know I'm awake and I want to get up and he jolts slightly. He looks down to his arms where I am and his eyes widen.

"Amber! God I am so sorry!" He takes his arms off of me and I jump off of him to the floor near his feet. I stretch out a little, missing the warmth of his body and the way he held me. No I don't!

"Have a nice nap brother?" Thor asks, making Loki jump. I look to Thor to also see Jane there, smirking at me and Loki.

"In fact, I did" He rolls his eyes. He reaches down and scratches the back of my ear. I felt like melting in his hands.

"I have decided to take Jane back to SHILED for a while so she can catch up with all her work. We also need to inform Fury of the progress here. Are you okay to look after Amber for a while?" Thor asks.

"Sure, it should be fine, if that's okay with you Amber?" he looks down at me.

I give a nod, great. Spending a while alone with Loki. How am I to survive?

Okay, to be honest, spending a few hours with Loki wasn't so bad. But I want to know how I would feel after a few weeks without my sister. During the time I have spent with them both, I have grown to trust them and I get to spend time with my sister.

Every time I'm near Loki, I feel something, like a connection or attraction towards him. I don't know why, he is my friend. He is nothing more. But why do I feel like this every time? I shake the thought out of my head.

Jane has a pool out the back of her house and I decided to go for a swim. I shift into my pup form and bound around the pool before jumping in. I rise to the surface and paddle around the pool.

I dive under again and try to swim to the bottom. I have been trying to train myself to swim deep under water in my pup form. I want all my wolf forms to be able to withstand almost anything and be strong.

I almost reach the bottom of the pool when all of a sudden, two large hands pick me up and bring me to the surface. I shake my head and I hear a chuckle in front of me. I open my eyes to see Loki is the one holding me.

I also then notice that he has no top on and he is half naked. I blushed furiously, but I'm glad that my pup form doesn't show it.

"What are you up to Amber?" He chuckles as I attempt to squirm out of his arms. He pulls me closer to his chest and I feel how muscled and smooth his body is. I give a little bark and I feel the vibrations emitting from his chest as he chuckles.

I shift back into back into my human form, glad that I am wearing my swimmers underneath. I then still feel Loki's arms around my waist and I look up into his beautiful emerald green eyes.

I realise how close our faces are, if I moved an inch closer, our lips would be touching. I can hear him breathing deeply and I watch as his eyes flicker back and forth from my eyes to my lips. I do the same. Then he closes the distance between us, his lips touching mine in a slow kiss.

At first, I freeze. I had never been kissed by anyone and this is a new feeling. I then respond back by wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling him closer. I then wrap my tail around his leg. He brings one of his hands from my waist up to my ears and scratches the back on my ears.

I laugh slightly as it tickled a bit. He pulls away and we rest our foreheads together, breathing deeply. He gives me a wide smile and I give him a shy one. He then goes to kiss me again and I allow him to. This time the kiss was more passionate and he pulls me closer to his body. He moves his hand from my ears to my cheek and he runs his thumb up and down.

I squeal as he brings his hand from my waist to my tail. He pulls on it slightly and I feel him smirk as I try to get my tail out of his hands. I break the kiss and try to swim away from him but he laughs and grabs me by the waist and pulls me so my back is on his chest.

"Trying to go somewhere?" he chuckles lowly.

"Maybe" I squirm out of his arms and manage to get out. I swim for the edge of the pool, whacking him in the face with my tail at the same time.

"Oh no you didn't" he playfully threatens.

I give him a smirk and climb out of the pool. I walk to the chair where my towel is and I turn to see Loki in the middle of the pool staring at me.

"You like something?" I walk closer to the edge of the pool, wrapping my towel around me.

"Yes" he nods. I roll my eyes and squat on the edge. I bring my tail over the pool water and flick a wave of water at him. He wipes his face with his hand and gives me a mischievous look as he walks towards me.

I stand back and move away from the edge of the pool. Loki lifts himself up and out of the pool and I watch as the water drips of his muscled body. Though his figure is much smaller than Thor's, he has a well-defined body. I try not to stare to long but I can't help it.

"See something you like?" he smirks at me now.

"Yeah, that pretty looking tree behind you" I watch as his smirk falls slightly and he raises his eyebrows.

"Really now?" He walks towards me and I take a step back each time.

"Yeah" I squeak as he starts walking faster.

I shift into my pup form, dropping my towel and running into the house. I hear Loki's footsteps running after me as I run around. I run towards my room and hide under the bad. I watch as his feet walk across the floor and I keep silent. When he is away from the door, I dash from under the bed and out the door to the living room.

I hear him grunt as he runs into the wall by accident and follows after me. I jump onto the couch and make myself comfortable. I lay on one of the pillows and yawn.

"There you are you little pup" he chuckles as I look at him with sleepy eyes. "Shouldn't you go shower fist before you ruin your sister's couch?"

I look at him to see he is topless and his hair is still wet which I find quite attractive. I roll me eyes and jump off the couch, walking tiredly towards my room. I suddenly felt myself being picked up again and being carried to my room.

Once reaching my room, he drops me down on the bed. "You really like to pick me up, don't you?"

"I like to hold you in my arms, that's why" he chuckles when he sees me blush.

"Thanks, by the way" I shuffle awkwardly in my spot.

"You're very welcome, I will order some dinner for us both" he walks off, leaving me to my thoughts.

I walk into the bathroom and prepare the shower. When I first came here, I had no idea how to use a shower. HYDRA's idea of a shower was dunking me in a tube filled with water with wires attached.

I take off my swimmers and step into the shower, allowing the water to run down. I think back to that moment we had in the pool. He kissed me first. Does that mean he likes me? How can he even like me? What does this mean for us now? I have never really learnt about those relationships with others and stuff like that.

HYDRA never told me much. The only thing they told me was to get this and get that. I never really had any knowledge of the real world. But as I slowly regained my memories, I remember a few things about the real world. HYDRA always kept me in the dark about many things.

Another thing is that they used to refer to me as monster after the werewolf incident. The many people I steal from refer to me as monster. That is why I call myself a monster. Because that is what I am. How can Loki like some monster like me?

I growl in frustration, what am I feeling?! I grab a bottle of shampoo and scrub it into my hair, avoiding it getting into my ears. I wash it off and wash my body. I run my hands over the multiple stars I have on my stomach. It reminds me of how HYDRA treated me.

This was the torture I got when I was younger. When I got older, they tortured me by an electric chair. It was much more painful than getting cut by knives. I condition my hair then wash it out. I step out of the shower and wrap the fluffy towel around me.

I walk into my room to find some clothes. Jane and I went shopping just the other day because she said I need new clothes that are not black. I rolled my eyes at her as I told her I like the colour. We then had an argument about how I should wear coloured clothes and not black as black is a shade and not a colour.

Loki walked in on us arguing and laughed about our topic. We had both glared at him and he just laughed even more. I liked to hear him laugh so when he did laugh, which was rarely, it would make me feel all warm inside.

I shake my head at my thoughts about Loki, it is always him. I take out a light grey jumper that is a size too big for me and a pair of black sports shorts. But the jumper was so long that it looked like a dress on me. The bigger the clothing, the more comfortable it is.

I walk out of the room and into the living room to see Loki laying on the couch watching TV. His hair was a little messy but dry and he was only wearing a pair of pants. I silently shift into my second wolf form, which is the size of a dog and jump over the couch, landing on his chest.

He immediately sits up and looks at me with shock and slightly winded. I stick my tongue out at him and give a small bark. He grabs me and pulls me down to his chest. As he scared me, I shifted back to my human form and laugh as he starts to tickle me.

He flips us over so he is straddling my waist and he tickles my sides. I try to squirm out of his grip but I feel weak as I keep laughing so much. He then stops tickling me but remains where he is.

He leans down and whispers in my ear. "I love to hear you laugh, it's better than you always growling"

I roll my eyes but blush anyway. He chuckles and sits up. He moves off of me and sits beside me. Seeing as I didn't move from my now seated position, he pulls me over so I'm leaning on his shoulder.

"What are we?" I ask, talking about the kiss.

"Whatever you want us to be" he turns away from the TV and looks at me.

"I don't know much about anything" I take his hand and measure mine against his.

"Then I can teach you about anything you want" he smiles softly at me. A smile that makes me melt. We sit in silence, watching this documentary about penguins. Yes I know I have skipped school because of HYDRA, but I am well educated in grammar and everything. HYDRA taught me many things but not the good things that can be really be put to good use in the real world.

The narrator of this documentary was saying penguins wrong. I'm not sure if he even knew what penguins were or how to say them but he kept saying pengwings. He says it every time and I don't know how it got past the editing of the documentary. Clearly the script said penguins, not pengwings. Am I right?

"Loki?" He hums in reply.

"Why do you take an interest in someone like me?" This time he turns to me with a frown.

"Why would you ask that?"

"Because, I'm a monster, I have killed so many people. I'm a creature of people's nightmares. Everyone fears me" I slightly growl.

"I see no monster, if you want a monster, look at me" I frown at his words.

"But I don't see a monster" he sighs and closes his eyes. All of a sudden, his skin changed to blue and when he slowly opened his eyes, they were red.

"Are you having second thoughts about yourself?" He asks sadly.

"I still don't see a monster. I see you still, the same guy that has always been so kind to me. Even though I did try to kill you the first time I saw you. And that time when you knocked me out. Oh and that time when you released that smoke on me, which also knocked me out. Oh yeah, and that time I knocked you over so I could escape" I list all those times I wanted to kill him.

"Well if you don't see a monster in me, I also don't see a monster in you. Though you spent most of your life in HYDRA, you have been able to grow into a great person. And pus, the ears and tail make you look cute" His cheeks show a slight pink when he said that last sentence.

I scrunch my face up. "Cute?"

"Yes, but I will tell you now, you are quite scary when you are angry" he chuckles.

"At least you won't be on my bad side" I bury my face into his neck and inhale his scent. Suddenly, someone knocks on the door and I look up.

"That must be the food" Loki gets up from the couch and walks towards the door. I sit there, watching TV until I hear a thump. And then a groan. I jump off the couch to see Loki picking up food off the ground and the delivery man unconscious on the floor.

"What happened?" I look at Loki who looks mad.

"HYDRA is after you. The guy tried to tranquilise me." He holds up the gun. "Why would HYDRA be after you?"

"I don't really know. Maybe because I was their most successful experiment and they want me back. And probably because I killed Strucker. You know, cut one head and you get two more"

"So they are after you?" He sums up.

"Yeah"

"We should tell SHIELD, they can protect you"

"Since when did you follow the orders of SHIELD? And even your boss said, he doesn't want me there"

"Thor and Jane are telling Fury of your progress. It will be fine. We cannot allow you to be captured by HYDRA"

"Why? Because you can't afford to lose any people against me?" I growl.

"No! I don't want you getting hurt!" he argues.

"Why would you care?" I snap. He looks hurt by what I just said.

"Because, I like you. And I care for you!" He walks off, leaving me in the hallway.

I growl in frustration. We had just talked about our relationship and then he thinks I have completely forgotten about what we talked about. I walk to my room and slam the door shut, not knowing what Loki is doing right now.

I punch the wall a few times, releasing al the anger I had. I feel so stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Why did I say that! I continue punching the wall, tears falling down my face. I never cry. And yet, here I am, crying. Crying is for the weak, Strucker told me. That is one rule I followed most of my life. But I don't live under his rules.

I am free from him. But I'm not free from HYDRA. HYDRA will not stop until they get me. I hear something in the wall crack as I keep punching the one area. I stop punching to see that I have indeed cracked a bit of the wall. I lean my forehead in the area that I punched and I cry.

I slowly slip down and wall and curl into a ball on the floor. I have to find a way to escape. I cannot afford to get Jane harmed or Loki. I don't want anyone to get injured because of me anymore. I have changed, I'm not the killer anymore. I value people's lives. I look towards the window of my room.

That is when I begin to form my plan. HYDRA knows where I am now. If I can lead them off from Jane's house, no one can be harmed because of me. I wipe my tears and walk over to my closet. I pick out a pair of black pants and shirt. I find a black hoodie as well and put that on.

I grab a backpack and stuff a new change of clothes. I grab the necklace given to me by Jane and place it around my neck. I rip out a piece of paper and write something on it for Loki and Jane if they were to check on me.

I check the time and see that it is almost 10pm. I open the window and look out seeing that everything is clear. When my senses told me no one was there, I jumped down into the backyard. I pass the pool Loki and I shared our first and probably last moment together and I jump over the fence.

"I'm sorry" I whisper when I turn back to the house. I then run off into the darkness, away from everyone. To protect Jane. And Loki.