Hi! So, thanks again for reading and giving your feedback and kudos. I know the direction of where I want the story to go, but it's a bit hard to flesh out when I don't want this fic to be too long, so keep that in mind. I'm having a lot of fun with this. Thanks again for everything my tiny fandom friends.
"Daddy, up up!" her little hands reached towards Nux, searching the newly added toy bins. He looked down at her then, his heart falling, sighing.
"I can try, Bliss," he bent down, his legs tired and weary. He could feel his arms struggle to even grip her, and, though he was nervous, he picked her up. She giggled, her arms wrapping around his neck and her legs around his chest.
"You like being up, huh?" Nux strained, forcing a smile.
"Up!" she repeated, bouncing on Nux's already shaky foundation. But he held on, don't drop her, don't drop her.
Capable walked in then, surprised to see Nux holding her. He had been so weak, lately, struggling to keep up in the garage. The Boys had worried, the Sisters worried, and Nux had worried... but he kept it away from himself.
He worried, but he wasn't surprised.
Capable nodded knowingly and took Bliss from him, her little hands gripping Capable's hair. Nux breathed out appreciatively, gaining what little bearing he had to stand.
"I'll take her to Remedy, just... just rest," she nodded to Nux, who swallowed and let his brows furrow.
Nux sat on the floor of the nursery after Capable left, his head feeling light and his muscles sore. He rested his head in his hands, swallowing, his skin cold and clammy. Glory, glory, please...
He felt Larry and Barry, he felt his breaths get shorter and shallower, harder. He sat up, his back leaning against the shelf for desperately needed support.
"Glory be..." Nux gasped, cursing himself, his body, and his fate.
–
"Clean bill of health," Remedy chimed, Bliss sitting on the medical table. "Blood's good, development is normal, all good." She hadn't shed a single tear at the immunization she received; a tough cookie, Capable thought.
Immunizations were gaining traction in the hightower and beyond. Remedy had spent the last year with that as her main project: documenting the molecular makeup of the diseases collected from the Wretched, and trying to come up with some sort of protection against them. Often all they needed was water and food and clean air, but for most of the growths and tumors there was some underlying cause, usually toxic radiation. She implemented an immunization program for all newborns about three months previous, and already the success was visible.
Bliss came to Capable, wanting to sit in her lap. Remedy checked some things off on papers, then turned to Capable.
"You need something else?" Remedy blinked.
"Ye-yeah. Nux, he's uh-"
"We talked about this, Capable..." Remedy crossed her arms.
"I know, I know... but... isn't there anything you can give him? Just for now?"
"He's already lined up for stimulants, something to keep him going, but that's all I can give him... it's all we have," she sat next to Capable now, Bliss fumbling with the toy she brought with.
Capable looked to the floor, her lips pursed.
"I'm sorry."
–
"It dark," Bliss murmured, her silhouette in her bed glowing yellow from the nightlight.
"You got your nightlight," Nux said softly to her, groggy. "And you got Whiskers."
Bliss hugged the stuffed cat close to her, gray and white and black, just like in the storybook's pictures. Just like daddy.
Bliss didn't seem convinced. She didn't like her new bed very much, and though she slept through the night now, often she woke up, and with waking up in the dark, comes a fear of it.
Nux sighed, getting down on his knees and resting his hand on Bliss's head.
"Nothing can hurt you," Nux comforted. "Mommy and daddy are right there, nothing's gonna come get you."
Bliss still seemed uneasy, petting Whiskers.
"Can you try and go to sleep?" Nux asked, his eyebrows raising.
Bliss shook her head.
"Why not?" he smiled then.
"The monsters," Bliss peeped. Her voice was still so new, and though she couldn't form sentences, she was very articulate.
"What monsters? There's no monsters here," Nux then tilted his head down as if he were going to tell Bliss a secret. "Those live in the garage."
Bliss grinned. "No."
"You're right, they're like monsters sometimes though, huh? They're scary looking and mean, right?"
Bliss giggled then. "No."
"Well, good thing you think that then. 'Cus those are the only monsters around here."
Bliss kept smiling, seemingly feeling better. Her eyelids began to drift, heavy.
The War Boys had visited often, helping Nux and Capable when one of them had to run out or work. Flaps was always the first to step up, nominating himself as the honorary babysitter of the group, still fawning over the two-year-old Bliss. He'd play all sorts of games with her, help her play games with her toys, all the things that daddy does as well. She missed daddy and mommy, but she liked Flaps too; he let her jump on him and run around. Bliss was never afraid of the Boys, though she had been hesitant with seeing Nux painted. For a while, she didn't quite understand that painted Nux and unpainted Nux were the same person.
There was a day when she wanted to be painted, too. "Clay, clay," she said, pulling on dad's pants. He didn't know what she meant until she rubbed her bare chest like Nux did when he spread the clay on his chest. They compromised, Bliss settling for a light dusting of flour on her nose. Just like daddy.
Nux rubbed her head, standing. Her face fell as he advanced towards the door.
"Stay."
Nux stopped in his tracks, smiling as he turned on his heels.
"Stay? Here?"
Bliss nodded.
Nux let out a heavy breath through his nose, approaching the now smiling Bliss.
"Scoot," he said, Bliss listening and taking her soft pink blanket and Whiskers to the other side of her twin bed. It was the smallest one they could find.
Nux lay down next to her, his arm nestled under her pillow. Nux's body barely fit, though Bliss didn't seem to mind, cuddling up to his chest and laying her head there. He felt her chest rise and fall, rise and fall, slowly now, slow. She was asleep.
I can die right now, right this second, and have zero regrets.
–
"You sure she'll like it?"
"Yeah mate, lookit it! How could she not?"
"It is real shiny, she likes shiny stuff."
"Will Nux 'n Capable be alright with it?"
"I'm sure, why not?"
"Well Nux always goes on 'n on 'bout how dangerous stuff is, ain't this thing dangerous?"
"Nah, it'll be great. Cover it up, he's comin' soon."
Nux emerged from the clay room, freshly painted and ready for a day in the sun, or maybe in the garage or Repair room or with the blood donations, wherever he was needed, really. He picked up a chart that hung on the wall, inspecting which tasks were done and which still needed to be done, his eyes tracing across a very productive day so far.
"Ay, Nux!" Flaps called from the garage, Nux's head snapping up to meet him.
"Ay!" he called back, excited to feel the presence of the garage. He felt lightheaded almost all the time now, but he'd gotten used to it, the sickness was part of him whether he fought it or not. There were good and bad days; today was a good day.
"We gotcha somethin'!" a different Boy called to him, excited.
Nux furrowed his brows. Something for him? From his Boys? He demanded nothing from them except respect and to not kill each other.
"Well, it ain't for you really," Flaps corrected.
"Yeah, yeah," the other Boy pushed Flaps, only to receive one in return. They were playing; they would always be Boys at heart.
Nux approached them, noticing the canvas-covered mound that their feet. "Yeah?" Nux smiled, greeted by clapping handshakes, how are ya, pleasantries.
"Right-o, alright, so we wanted to give 'lil Bliss somethin' for her second birthday," Flaps announced, much to Nux's surprise.
"Ay, you don't hafta do that," Nux interjected.
"Shuddup for like one second, mate," Flaps joked with a push. "She's onna the only ones in the whole Citadel that actually knows 'er birthday, so we should celebrate, ya know?"
"She turned two half a year ago," Nux laughed. "Yer a bit late."
"Yeah, well, it took some time. And care." Nux raised his eyebrows at the shifty-eyed Flass. "Alright, fine, we fucked it up like twelve times, thanks to fuckin' ruddy hands over 'ere."
"Ay! I told you I shake, that ain't my-"
"Stop! Stop. So, you made her a present? Why ya givin' it to me then?" Nux interrupted before it turned into another brawl.
"Well you always goin' on about safety and rules 'n shit, so we figured instead of just haulin' it up there we'd ask ya first if it was alright."
Nux smiled. Knowing his boys, they made her a flame thrower and to them it would be safe because "fire disinfects."
Flaps grabbed the cloth and pulled with exaggerated showmanship, revealing the beaut that lay underneath.
"Whoa, Boys," Nux's jaw dropped. He was legitimately impressed. "Where'd ya get the chrome for this?"
"We scrapped it together from little pieces we couldn't use," Flaps said proudly.
Nux bent down to it, his hand running along the chrome. "It's real chrome, guys, real shine. She'll love it. She'll absolutely love it."
"Ah das great, mate. We ain't put an engine in it yet but we figured you wouldn't want that so-"
"Later. We'll put in the engine later."
"Just a small one, no real power."
Nux laughed. This was the last thing he had anticipated from his Boys. They had never made anything like this before, how did they even know how?
"Bring it up to the sand," Nux stood. "I'll go get 'er."
The boys cheered and clamored to pick it up, not too heavy but not exactly light. They scrabbled to walk up the stairs with it, and set it down on the orange sand shaded by the hightower.
Nux practically ran to the hightower, still painted. He was out of breath by the time he reached the highest floor, where the Dag and Capable were playing with Bliss, some make-believe game with her dolls, crafted with love.
"Is something wrong?" Capable asked. He usually never came up painted, nonetheless out of breath. Though he grinned.
"No, no, comere, grab Bliss for me," Nux was excited, the boyish enthusiasm returning to him. It made Capable smile. She scooped up Bliss, the Dag staying back, and they descended the staircase to return to the sand level.
"Nux!" the Boys called, seeing him emerge from the hightower. He scrambled towards them, Bliss making out little words as she bounced with mom's steps. Nux, Nux, Nux. Dad!
Finally, the glint of chrome met their eyes. The sun gleamed off of the shiny object, the two Boys standing near it, proud and excited.
"Ay, alright, it should go just fine," Flaps patted Nux's back, then made a funny face at Bliss, who giggled.
"Glory be," Capable gasped, smiling.
The chrome of the trike stood out against the orange sand, its tires huge compared to its small body. Its chrome would stay cool, shaded under black protectors that kept the hot sun away from Bliss's skin. Bliss was set down into the sand, her bare feet digging into it as she ran towards the trike.
"How's it move?" Nux asked, Bliss very curious and touching all over. The handlebars, the seat, the tires.
"Well there's these things called 'pedals'," Flaps said, "and it's like you're the engine 'cuz your feet make it go. Here, like this." He bent down and pushed down on one of the pedals, propelling the bike forward. Bliss followed it in the short jolt.
"Thought those were on flowers," Nux was amazed.
"You're thinking of petals, Nux," Capable giggled.
A confused look from Nux. "A-alright."
Bliss giggled, looking up to Flaps. "Flaps!"
"Yeah, 'das me!" he cooed, bending down to her.
"Help 'er get innit, see if she likes it," the other Boy said.
Flaps picked her up from her armpits, sliding her body into the seat. Her legs were the perfect length for the pedals, something the Boys had worries about, but now they congratulated themselves on their estimate.
"Kick the pedals, like this," Flaps leaned over her, pushing her feet into the black pedals with his hands. The trike jumped forward, her hands on the handlebars, her eyes gleaming.
She continued the movement, jerky, but she did it. The trike glided across the sand, slow, to the amazed eyes of her onlookers.
"Ah, she'll be a regular driver real soon!" Flaps clapped, Nux laughing loudly with him.
"Are you sure it's safe?" Capable piped up. She was excited as well, happy to see Bliss's new toy.
"Yeah, yeah, it can't burn 'er. No engine in it or anything, tires can't pop, they too small, and it won't go very fast at all," Flaps comforted.
"She ain't even gotta be a lancer first, bloody lucky 'lil squirt," Flaps continued. He then bent down to her, who how just wiggled the handlebars from side to side. "The rest of us had to be lancers before we could be drivers, and look at you, you already got yer own rig. Though I guess we could put a lancer's perch on it, maybe some poles for Pole Katz..."
"No!" Nux laughed, a hearty laugh from Flaps returned.
Bliss continued to pedal, getting the hang of it.
"This is amazing, thank you, Boys," Capable grinned, her hand patting Flaps's back.
"Chrome!" Bliss chimed.
–
"Why is it like that?" Bliss ran her hand across the scar on Nux's chest, her other hand running along her own.
"Well," Nux swallowed. How do I approach this? "Back when dad was a little kid, all his friends were scarring themselves up like this," he ran his hand over his chest, "and dad wanted something super shine, so his friends would think he was shine too. You know, like that rabbit in that one story?"
"He turned blue," she smiled, "because his friends did too."
"Yeah! It's like that."
"I want to."
"You want what?"
"I want my chest like yours."
He held his breath for a second. "No, Bliss, no you don't."
She was confused, but was interrupted from asking more questions when Nux helped her put a shirt on. She's gotten so verbal lately, always talking to someone or something, asking questions.
"I like baths," she said, wiggling into her shirt.
"Good, they're good for you," Nux smiled, taking a smaller towel and ruffling it through her curly hair. The only sound for a while was their breaths and the ruffling of clothes.
"Why is it hot?" she asked.
"Are you hot? It's pretty cool in here."
"Outside."
"Ah. Well, we're in the desert, so it's hot. When it's nighttime, it's cooler, remember?"
She nodded.
"C'mon. Let's get breakfast before we go out," Nux stood, his hand on the back of her head as he opened the door.
–
"What's he do?" she asked, the puzzle before her unfinished.
"What does who do?" Capable slid one piece of the puzzle closer to Bliss.
"Dad."
Capable smiled. "He works in the garage with his friends, you know that."
"But what does he do?"
"He builds and fixes cars," Capable slid the puzzle piece into place to the amusement of Bliss.
"Chrome," she smiled, bouncing.
"Yeah, chrome," Capable let out a breathy laugh. "Lots of it."
"I want to color," Bliss said as the puzzle was finished. Cheedo had helped copy some pictures from books onto some thick paper that she cut into big puzzle pieces.
"We can color," Capable grinned, leaving the puzzle there as she rose to retrieve the coloring supplies from Bliss's room. They had received crayons, well, colored wax, from some very generous marketwoman. Wax was extremely sought after because candles lasted much longer than lanterns, so her sacrifice was not without great appreciation. Bliss loved them, she colored with no abandon, telling tales that could only come from such a young mind.
Capable set down the supplies, Bliss shuffling over to them. She smiled as she dug in, searching for whatever color she had in her mind.
Grey, black, and blue.
She started to doodle, Capable's mind elsewhere. She had been feeling better seeing how well Bliss was doing, how well Nux was taking care of her and the support they've gotten from everyone. It took some time, but she and Nux were better as well, their relationship growing stronger every day. It's to be expected; neither of them had any idea what they were doing in a relationship. It would take effort and care to construct something meaningful- a goal they both kept close to their hearts.
Capable was snapped back to this reality when Bliss flipped her paper up to Capable's face. She had to lean her head back to see the figure on the page.
Grey skin with black eyes, a torso and a head, and two black legs sticking out from the bottom of it. Though interrupting the monochrome scheme was a big scribble of blue on the middle of the figure's torso.
"That's daddy," Capable smiled. "But... why's his chest blue?"
"He said he turned blue, like the bunny," Bliss tilted her head, lowering the paper.
Capable had no idea what she was talking about. There was a story she read to her, about the white bunny that turned blue because all his friends wanted him to, but-
Oh.
"I see," Capable nodded.
Bliss continued doodling, so fiercely independent now. She'd been refusing help dressing lately, wanting to take baths by herself to the disagreement of Capable, and playing alone. She was never one for tantrums, but she cried less, now. She wanted to explore more, learn about the world. She still loved to cuddle, though, often playing with Capable's hair or nuzzling into Nux's shoulder. She asked why the sky was blue, how strawberries grew, why Toast's hair was short like hers but no one else's. She liked to see the greenhouse and touch the leaves, the fruits and vegetables.
Flaps would come and watch her, play with her, more frequently. Capable often had to go assist the Nurturers with the Pups, as they were down one, the others stricken by illness. Flaps would take her outside more than not, Bliss preferring to color or play with blocks with Capable. Flaps was rougher with her than Nux was, chasing her, throwing her and catching her, general roughhousing. Bliss loved it. She'd always been excited to see Flaps, running to his arms and enjoying how he lifted her up above him.
A quiet evening was just what both of them needed.
–
Capable often brought her with to see the Pups, hoping she would make friends. The odds were against her: she was only five, while the Pups were generally between seven and twelve. The Pups were all boys, and this was what worried Capable the most. Her first day there, though, and her worried were dispelled. She'd play their games, throwing a ball just as good as them, she'd wrestle and romp.
That is, until she came home with a black eye.
"What the fuck?" Nux rushed to her, holding a baggy with cold slurry on her eye.
"Don't curse around her, she'll copy you..." the Dag droned, holding a cloth.
"I... I don't care. What happened? What happened to her?" he crouched down to see her, trying to catch her gaze that she kept from him.
The Dag reached to take the slurry bag from her eye, wrapping it in the cloth.
"Glory!" Nux exclaimed, seeing the bruising that surrounded her left eye. "Who hurt you?"
"Nobody," she peeped, still not looking at him.
Nux was livid. Not with Bliss or the Dag, or... anyone really. He was ready to brawl anyone who tried anything, though. Who hurt his Bliss? Who dared?
"It was an accident, Nux," Capable said, emerging from her bedroom into the foyer.
"What do you mean 'an accident?" Nux stood to meet her, almost confrontational if he weren't approaching Capable.
"One of the Pups was just a bit too rough," Capable stood still, the angry mass that is a perturbed Nux almost storming towards her.
"I told you it was a bad idea," Nux said, his voice as hushed as he could make it. "I told you they'd be too rough. That's how they are, that's how we all were, there's no-"
"Nux," she put her hands on his shoulders, grounding him. He took a deep breath, nodding, his mania calming with her firm grip.
"Sorry, sorry..." he breathed, turning back to Bliss who met him with tears in her eyes.
"Daddy," she started to cry, the Dag looking to him and rubbing Bliss's back.
He rushed to her, crouching down so he looked up to her, cradling her head in his hand and reaching up to wipe her tears.
"Daddy, daddy, I'm sorry. I'm sorry," she cried, Capable meeting eyes with the Dag.
"Sorry? Sorry for what?" he cooed.
"I made you angry, I'm sorry."
"No, no, Bliss, no, you didn't make me angry, shhh," he moved to sit next to her and lifted her up to sit in his lap. "I'm not mad at you."
"You yelled at me."
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, I'm not mad at you, Bliss," he brushed the hair out of her face.
She calmed then, feeling his fingers brush her hair. Capable approached the both of them, then, swallowing.
"Now," Nux placed her back on the couch, sitting beside her. "What happened?"
"They play this game," Capable chimed in, "where they pile up on each other, and-"
"Joe Pile, I know it," Nux smiled. "Who was the Joe on the bottom?" he turned his head to Bliss, who now looked up to him with glee.
"Scraps! He didn't count fast enough," Bliss cheered, the slurry returning to her eye.
"Ah, I was always the Joe... I can't count very fast. But you must've been on top 'cuz you're such a good counter," Nux patted her back. "Did you have fun?"
She nodded enthusiastically.
"Everything is fine," Capable sat next to Bliss on the other side of Nux.
"Yeah, everything's fine," Nux grinned, Bliss meeting it with her own. "Wouldn't be my girl if she couldn't take a tumble, right?"
–
Capable was staying overnight with the Pups, two Nurturers now gone. They needed someone to make sure they didn't get into trouble; often they'd try to sneak out to muddle around and make trouble.
So, Nux adopted bedtime duty.
"You gotta brush your teeth," Nux insisted, Bliss currently running around him half-naked. She'd strewn her pajama top somewhere in the nighttime hyperactivity. Nux threw his head back, her giggles antagonizing.
"Bliss!" he called to her when she started to take off her pants. He rushed to her, scooping her up. "What's with you and getting naked all the time?"
She giggled, tapping her hands against his chest. "You don't wear clothes."
"I wear clothes!" he touched his forehead to her, carrying her to the bathroom.
"Pants only," she grinned as he set her down on the step stool so she could reach the sink.
"Yeah, but you gotta wear more than pants," he said.
She pouted, her hair still wet from the bath. She grabbed her toothbrush, something Nux had only recently learned about as well. She wet it and pasted it, rubbing it against the teeth that she had.
"Thank you," Nux sighed, turning from her to go find her clothes.
She finished up, climbing down. She settled down now, the excitement of Nux being with her tonight dying down. She felt sleepy and ready for bed.
Nux was thankful for this, helping her get dressed for the third time that night, and turned to leave the bathroom.
"My hair."
Nux stopped and turned.
"Your hair?"
"Mommy puts my hair up at night," she rocked on her feet.
Nux looked around the room. He didn't know what that meant. Then he did: when he'd come and wake her up in the morning, her hair was in... what did Capable call it? A ponytail. What's a pony, and why's it got a tail, and why's her hair look like it?
"I uh... I don't know how..." Nux kept his eyes on the hairbrush on the counter.
Bliss nodded, starting to move towards him, looking downtrodden.
"But I can try!" he offered, Bliss's previously distraught face brightening.
He sat on her bed with her nestled between his legs. She sat as he examined his tools that she'd laid out to him. Alright, a hair tie. That kind of looks like an o-ring. A hair brush, ok, I've seen Capable use that, you just run it through. Some clips which he snapped between his fingers, pink and green. How does she use these?
Bliss was patient as he tried to gather her hair, piling it on top of her head. He twisted her hair with the tie every which way. How is this o-ring supposed to make the... ponytail thing? He looped her hair through it after brushing it. Alright, step one done. Now, do I... twist it like this? Yeah, alright, and loop it through again. Right-o, it's going good, there we go. He dropped the hair from his hand, her curly hair cascading to the nape of her neck. He snapped the pink and green clips to her scalp, quite randomly, but Bliss seemed pleased.
"Alright!" Nux was possibly more excited than Bliss was.
Bliss hopped up to her feet, turning to Nux and wrapping her little arms around his neck. He smiled, sighing into her head.
"Thank you, daddy."
He pulled her closer to him and squeezed her lightly.
"Can you read a story?" she climbed into her bed.
Nux swallowed. He'd been trying to learn how to read properly, Capable helping him nearly every night with a new children's story, and he was indeed getting the hang of it. Would he be able to read a whole different book to her, though?
"Yeah, yeah, go pick one out," he smiled, sitting on her bed.
She beamed and reached as high as she could at the bookshelf, gripping a pink-lined one and holding it close to her chest as she bounded back to Nux.
He held it in his hands. He wasn't able to read the title. He knew "the", and sounded out the words after it, only really an estimate.
"It's alright, daddy," she sat next to him and cradled herself in his chest so she could see the book, "I have to go slow, too."
Nux's chest hurt. She was so wise, beyond her years. She must have learned the compassion from her mother. Thank goodness.
"Are you sure? It might take me a bit," he was nervous. He didn't want Bliss to see him like this. He'd been the one to push her to read, to write, to be better than him. He never received such opportunities and it surely bit him in the ass now.
Bliss only nodded, Nux sighing.
"The... ha-happ-happy. The happy... Tu—turt-"
"Turtle," Bliss beamed. She got to help daddy today. She loved to help daddy, helping him clean up or helping him walk when he didn't feel up to it.
"Turtle. The Happy Turtle," Nux smiled. "Thanks."
Bliss only snuggled in closer.
–
The engine roared to life to the very amused laughs of Bliss, who sat in the seat of the rig, her hands gripping the wheel. Her knuckles turned white, her pupils constricted, adrenaline ran through her with every vibration that coursed through her feet. She was too young to know it yet, only six, but she would soon need this feeling just to survive.
"No."
Nux was firm, his arms crossed. Flaps and another War Boy threw their arms up, what? How can you say that? Look at her, she's so happy. Mate, lookit that smile, she's a natural.
"No, no, no way."
Bliss looked on sadly as Flaps disengaged the engine on her newly upgraded and grown trike, the seat set back to accommodate her growing legs.
"Dad-"
"No. No, get off now," he rushed over to pick her up, but she squirmed.
"The Pups go out on 'em all the time," she whined.
Flaps and the other Boys had constructed three more trikes like Bliss's. She had been the envy of the Pups, and now that they were older, there were engines involved. Bliss had looked on from the hightower as they kicked up sand, Capable combing her hair with her fingers.
"I don't care," Nux insisted.
Bliss pouted, not breaking eye contact. She'd learned that from the Boys, no doubt. A challenge.
"Why not?" she finally said, the tension between them purely parental.
"It's too dangerous," Nux didn't even blink.
"But they-"
"I don't care."
Her features twisted then, and, swinging her legs off and hopping down to the garage floor, she started to cry.
Nux swallowed, Larry and Barry biting him. His head hurt, whether it was from his illness or upsetting Bliss, he didn't know.
"Ay, mate," Flaps offered, sensing the conflict Nux felt in his own head. "She'll be right."
"Nux, we were ridin' cars by the time we were Inducted. And that's what, like, only two years ahead of her? She'd be fine."
"You're goin' on about how dangerous everythin' is all the time. You forgettin' we live in a fuckin' wasteland?"
Nux looked at the trike, then at his Boys, then to the exit.
It seemed like Nux was always saying no to her. She wanted to play with dad's tools, she wanted (again) to paint herself up, she wanted to go on drives with him, she wanted to wear big baggy pants like dad, she wanted to take off her shirt, it seemed like a never-ending bombard of "no". He'd gotten used to it, the guilt from it placated by Capable's assurance that, yes, it's necessary to tell her no.
He'd seen her storm out of the garage. He knew she would be safe; no one in the Citadel would dare to hurt the Inheritor. She'd liked to wander, to visit the marketwomen, to listen to the Dag in the greenhouse. She was so mature for her age, so introspective. She liked to think; with a new understanding of emotions, came a lot of thinking.
–
Capable settled into Nux's chest, his arm wrapped around her shoulder as they lay in bed. She smiled, feeling the sweat on her brow cool.
"Nux," she breathed, kissing the skin of his chest that she could reach. His heart slowed, the adrenaline soaked back in.
"Glory, Capable..." he leaned his head into the pillow.
Silence then, their breaths slowing and the aftershocks of their orgasms glided over them and settling into the room.
Intimacy had never been something Nux even toyed with the idea of, before he met Capable. To rut is to breed, and breeding was forbidden among the half-lives. Though now he knew that sex was more, sex was something so powerful it gave him a break from Larry and Barry and the growing pains in his back and legs. The pain settled in again, nesting like a wasp.
"Nux," Capable whispered into the dark.
"Yeah?" he responded.
"How much longer?" her voice was scratchy, raspy.
Nux let out a long sigh. "I don't know."
Capable nodded into his shoulder.
"It doesn't matter," he said. "Why are you so focused on how much longer?"
"I... I was thinking of how best to approach it with Bliss."
He held his breath. Why had she decided on now to breach this subject?
"It's only fair to her, Nux."
He nodded. She was five years old, she noticed when daddy wouldn't be able to hold her or play with her, she noticed when he needed to sleep that day. He didn't know what to do about it- he didn't want to know how much longer he had to live, he didn't want to know if the hardest day of the week would be his last.
Nux's death loomed in every moment he spent with Capable or Bliss. It was in every short breath he took, every stumble, every night fever and every tightening of his throat.
He didn't know what to do.