(AN: I'll do author's notes every 3 chapters. Fem! canada is appearing in this and will be in future chapters. please leave a review and honestly tell me what you think of my story. i dont own hetalia!)

Give Me A Reason

Chapter 6

As soon as Matthew hit the floor, the nurse grabbed his limp body and rushed him into the surgery room. After 15 minutes of waiting outside the operating room, they carefully placed Matthew's body on a bed and rolled it into a private room on the second floor of the hospital. The nurse followed him and begged the on-site doctor to be Matthew's nurse while he's here. Not wanting to hear anymore begging, the doctor said yes and gave her the clipboard containing all medical information on him. She sat down next to his bed, hearing the monitors beep. 2 days pass; she is always in his room checking up on him and changing his bandages. As soon as she saw blood leak through his bandages, she removes them and changes them for the day. 15 minutes later, she looks over and sees Matthew opens his eyes and smiles. "Good evening Mr. Williams. How are you doing?" he looked at her and smiled softly. "I feel like crap and hurting." He mumbles. "Well if it makes you feel better, your stomach was injured badly to where it has 20 stitches, you have a concussion, and that's pretty much it." He looked at her and smiled, knowing that someone remembered him.

"Do you work here a lot?" he asked after 5 minutes of silence. "No, im just a visiting nurse. I'm from Canada, and I work there, but my boss made me try out nursing in America." She said while playing with her hair. He sat up, with her help of course, and looked at her. "Im leaving for Ontario in a few days, do you wanna fly back home with me?" She looked at him and smiled softly. "Id love to. It would save on money and someone's time. Thank you very much Mr. Williams." she looked at him and smiled. He grabbed the clipboard and the pen that was attached to it and wrote down his number. "Here, so that way you can text me when you are ready to go." She blushed slightly and smiled. After a few minutes of exchanging numbers, she looked in his eyes and smiled. "Im Madeline. I'm surprised that your wounds are healing fast." She said while looking at one mark on his arm slowly scar up and then fade away. "That's because im the representative of Canada. I don't heal as slow as my citizens. I should be fine enough to go home. And do you know what day it is?" he asked. "It's the 14th of june and its 6:45 in the morning." She said while he face palmed. "Shit. I hate to be a bother but could you go to my school and pick up my diploma? And besides, tonight's when im leaving." He said while stretching. Madeline sat up and smiled, "id love to. It'll get me out of the hospital for a while. Do I need to wear anything special?" "No not really. If you want to you can. Oh, I forgot to mention this but I know it will happen. My family forgets me often, so when they see you and you say my name, they'll remember me. Can you please not tell them where I am?" he begged her. She smiled softly. "I'd never break a promise. When do I need to go?" "My school is on Pomona and chapmen; it'll start in 15 minutes. Since my last name is Williams, it'll be called near the end. But good luck, im gonna go sign myself out, go home and grabs some things, then ill text you when im done." Matthew said as he carefully pulled out the ivs from his arms. "Alright, ill meet you at the park by the school, got it?" she said while putting her hair into two usual low pigtails. "Got it." Matthew said as he put on his shirt, being thankful that he already had his pants on.

Madeline walked out of her car and looked at the school in front of her. "Wow. So huge, how the hell do you not get lost?" she mumbled. "Hey babe~ how would you like to stimulate my economy?" Alfred said as he put his arm around her waist and smiled. She kicked him in the nuts as Arthur and Francis walked over to help him. "Im sorry for my son's behavior. I'm Arthur Kirkland, his father. Did he try and flirt with you?" he said while grabbing Alfred's arm hard while giving her his soft face. "Yes, im Madeline. I'm looking for the auditorium. Do you know where it is?" she said while looking at her hands. "Yes we are going there; would you like to tag along with us?" Francis said. Smiling, she walks with them, seeing Alfred walk with his friends and Arthur sitting next to her. After 45 minutes of hearing random names being announced, she heard Matthews name. "Matthew Williams." "WAIT!" she yelled as she excused herself form where she was sitting and ran up to the stage and looked at the principal. "Matthew Williams isn't here today because he is at a disclosed location, but he did want his diploma. May I please have it so I can give it to him?" she said in one big breath. "Sure, I don't really know who he is anyways." He said while putting the diploma, along with some other papers in the envelope, and gave it to her. As she walked off the stage and back to her car, all she heard was, "who?" "I don't know who he is?" "Does he even go here?" "Who is he?" and ran faster to her truck. Back at the ceremony, Francis looked down and sighed, earning a look from Arthur. "Are you ok?" he looked up at him and smiled. "Yes, I think I just forgot something." "Well what ever it was, it probably wasn't even that important." Arthur mumbled as he kissed Francis's nose.

Matthew put the last pair of shoes that he had, not that 5 were a lot, in the suitcase he had in front of him. As he turned around, he saw how dark and nice the room looked. The fridge in the closet was cleaned out, the sink and bathroom clean, and the bed made. He packed up kumajiro's food and accessories in his own suitcase, then putting kumajiro in his own cage. He sighed, knowing that no one would look for him, so he took the bags and put them in his car. Walking back upstairs, he had 10 locks on one side of the door, on the hinges too, so around 40 locks were used. He locked 20 on the side he was on, walking out the front door and back into his room through the window, and locked the other 20. Matthew looked at his room and sighed because if anyone even bothered to look in here, they wouldn't find anything good. All they would know is that Matthew Williams lived here: neglected, abused, and a victim of self-harm. He left a note on the bed, taking one last look of his room, he shed a tear and saluted the room. "Goodbye. Goodbye my friend." Were the last words anyone made in the room. Jumping down the ladder, he made sure kumajiro was in the car in his cage, and drove to the park.

"Dear Reader,

I know that this letter will rot away because no one wants to look inside this wasteland of a room. Id like to say that I, Matthew Williams: the representative of Canada, have decided that after many years of abuse and neglect, to move to Canada. And id like to say another thing too. If this is some how, by some miracle in any space and time, Arthur, Alfred, or Francis reading this, then read last four words of this letter and fucking remember it you hosers. Id like to start out with Francis, my papa. When I was very little, he payed so much attention to me, like if no one else excited but me. I very, rarely, have any dreams, but when I do, it's mostly of the old days. But now, he hardly pays attention to me. When Francis met Arthur, I noticed how the small child next to Arthur had his hair almost like his, but there were some differences to it. First my hair parted in the middle, not to the right like Alfred. Second, when we were teenagers and needed glasses, Alfred's were rectangles, while mine were an oval shaped. And last but not least, im very quiet, shy, and sensitive unlike Alfred who was loud, annoying, and obnoxious. When Francis and Arthur were first dating, Francis used to sneak in women after their 'date's '. As much as it hurt me to see someone being betrayed, he didn't know that he too would be used like those women. Next is Arthur, my dad. It is true that he can't cook for his life, but he can do two things right: make tea and discuss litature. He met Francis when both Alfred and I were 4 years old, the day that I regret with a passion. All he does is complain about some scandal that happened to the queen's son's brother, one of the things he respects and cares for. When all four of them got a house for the boys to live in, that's the day that I wish never came. That day was the day when everyone started to ignore him, especially Francis. Arthur would sometimes look at me like a stranger, no wait; scratch that- every time he looked at me he would forget who I was the next minute. All I wanted was to have a role model in his life who acted like an adult instead of a pervert, but it looks like I didn't get that. The last and least is sadly my brother, Alfred. My brother would beat me up in my room, thus I having an abusive childhood, both mental and physical abuse. When we would be at school, along with the other kids, Alfred would tease me. When they first entered junior high, the bullying got worse. And that's where the cutting begins. My 'helpful and kind brother' is just another bully. And now even that we are in their senior year, he calls me faggot, even though I am straight and have a very feminine way of looking at things, and how I should die. Hell, he's sent me to the hospital many times because he beat me up so hard. And I even got beaten up for him when other students confused me for him, still going to the hospital. But did no one call or even bother to visit, nope. All I am is just a waste of space, someone who should die. And I will admit that because of the abuse that my family has put me through, I am an active cutter. I cut myself almost every day, just to remind me that im sadly alive. I know that no one is going to come looking for me, so why bother making a letter so no one can read it? I want to make sure that someone knows that I hate Francis, Arthur, and Alfred with a passion. I don't love them, but id love to see them crawl and beg for forgiveness. I should be going, lots to do in Canada. Before I go, id just like to say that im leaving my room, which to me was my home. I adjusted the sink in the bathroom to become like a kitchen sink and even put a fridge in the walk in closet. I lived in my room alone, well kumajiro was there, but otherwise I was alone. I hope that I find my silver love soon. I bid my farewell and hope to find the love of my life, someone with beautiful silver hair.

Its All Your Faults

- Matthew Williams."