Their plan may have worked too well, for the next four days after the barbecue not a single neighbour came near them, the only contact had been an early morning visit the next day from Jesse to tell them that he and James were going out of town for the next few days and to thank them for giving him the best entertainment he'd had since moving to the sorry street.
But without the distraction of neighbours and being cut off from everyone else in their lives, the boredom was quickly starting to set in. With only each other for company, the conversation had at first been forced and stilted, but they soon had no choice but to relax in each other's presence.
"I'm so BORED!" Daniel groaned and pulled a cushion up to his face, groaning into it.
"For the seventieth time, I know!"
Daniel dropped the pillow from his face and looked at Wilhelmina who was sat on the opposite armchair with her legs tucked underneath her. Seeing her in such a relaxed pose was now customary to Daniel. "I'm sorry, I know I'm like a broken record but there's nothing to do!"
"So you thought you'd revert to your speciality of whining?"
"Why not, you never really gave up your speciality of being bitchy did you?"
She raised her eyebrows at him and smirked, a look which he returned. "There MUST be something around here we can do, if I have to spend another day in front of the television watching bad game shows and Barbara fucking Walters I swear I'll end it all," Daniel said in all seriousness.
"Don't let me stop you." Willie turned her gaze to the magazine in her hand, not even reading the words on the page, she had read it cover to cover already and there were no other reading materials in the house. She sighed abruptly and closed the magazine on her lap, turning her gaze to Daniel's sullen face. "I suppose...we could go out."
"Where?" He shrugged, "There's next to nothing in this town and as much as I'm enjoying the fact that we're getting along, I don't think we're quite at the hand holding strolls through the park, do you?" he offered, facetiously.
"Okay, smart ass, you stay here and sulk. I'm going out." She stood from the chair and Daniel watched her rise. Yet again, it struck him how he thought he had known Wilhelmina, but had clearly been wrong. The woman he thought he knew would never have entertained the prospect of leaving the house in the attire she was currently wearing: still in denims, with a loose white shirt over them, or with so little make up and her hair pulled back in a hasty ponytail, coming down in curls at her back.
"Where are you going?" he asked her.
She picked up the car keys and faced him again, every time she looked at him she had to fight the urge to laugh at the wardrobe which had been assigned to him. He looked exactly how he should: a middle-aged accountant. "There's still some cash left, plus we had the drop off yesterday of our oh-so-extravagant hundred dollar allowance. You've eaten practically everything in the cupboards and we're out of alcohol...which trust me, I sorely need. And Mode's out today, I want to get a copy so I can make sure they haven't screwed everything up back at the office. This issue was pretty much put to bed when we left so it should be okay...it's the next one we have to worry about, but hopefully we'll be home and this will all be a distant memory by then."
Daniel brightened slightly, he had forgotten they had cash to spend. "Can I come this time?"
"If it will shut you up and stop your incessant whining, I'll even let you drive." She dangled the keys from her fingertips and he hurriedly jumped up and snatched them before she could change her mind.
xXx
"Okay issue number one without Daniel and Willie has officially hit the stands! No bitchy calls from SSP at Fashion Buzz so I think we pulled it off." Marc grinned and leaned back in the chair behind Wilhelmina's desk, his hands behind his head.
"SSP?" Betty questioned.
Marc rolled his eyes. "Suzuki St Pierre, learn your acronyms!" He pushed himself forward to where she was perched on the desk and flicked her forehead.
"OW!" She rubbed the sore spot. "Marc I don't think we have that much to be proud of yet. Wilhelmina and Daniel had nearly a full book of content when they left, all we had to add was a couple of extra ad placements and trim the Mode girl on Madison piece...it's next month I'm terrified about. What if people can tell it's not Daniel and Wilhelmina's voices? What if it bombs? What if the competition figures out they're M.I.A? What if..."
Marc rolled his eyes and fished in his pocket for something, then threw the shiny object at Betty. She caught it and held it up in front of her face; his inhaler. "I think you need this more than me Miss Hissy-fit...just don't get any of your guacamole germs on it. And anyway, I totally know how to inject Willie's voice into the magazine and if we whine about a couple of things, I'm sure we can imitate Daniel's too." Betty rolled her eyes and threw the inhaler back at his smirking face.
"So this is where you two have been hiding." Amanda trilled as she flounced into the office, one hand on her hip and the other swinging exaggeratedly in front of her as she walked.
Betty squinted her eyes and looked upwards, in thought. "How can we hide in a glass office?"
"Good question. How can you come to work dressed like that when you can see your reflection in every wall?" Amanda shot back.
"Oooh, quick!" Marc applauded her.
Amanda smiled and gave him a mock curtsey. "Anyway, Claire's all up in my pooch about you guys, you have a meeting with her in like..." She checked her watch. "Thirty minutes ago."
Marc and Betty both stood abruptly. "WHAT!" They screeched in unison.
"What I told you both at lunch."
"Amanda we haven't had lunch yet, it's ten thirty!" Betty admonished her.
Amanda flapped her hand at them as she walked from the room. "What ev's, she's in the penthouse."
xXx
"How do people do this regularly, I can honestly say I have never experienced anything more soul destroying." Willie complained as she walked, slumped over, pushing the cart down the aisles of the market.
"Come on, you've never done this?" Daniel asked her, walking in front of her, placing items in the cart behind him. For every two items he put in, Willie would take one out and shove it back on the shelf without him noticing.
"Nope, unless you count going into D'Agostino's and getting one of the clerks to run and fetch me anything I might need."
Daniel chuckled. "No...I don't think that counts. I used to love doing my own stuff when I was in college."
"I think we need food with a bit more substance than whatever you and your bimbo for the night would grab when you went on your run for midnight munchies."
He turned round to face her and almost caught her secreting a bag of chips back on the shelf. "Food with substance? So you DO eat." He smirked.
Willie rolled her eyes at him. "Of course I eat Daniel...I just don't stuff myself like you do. I eat what I need and no more." They rounded the corner and Daniel grabbed two tubs of salsa for the chips that were no longer in the cart. Willie bit the inside of her cheek and swiftly placed them back on the shelf when he turned back around.
"So what do you want?" He asked her.
She shrugged. "I don't know...actually that's a lie, I want caviar and I want Jean Cristoffe's speciality oysters...but I guess pre packaged salad and processed chicken is just as good...yum." She deadpanned.
"There must be some normal food you like." He threw twinkies over his shoulder and heard them land in the cart. "Don't put them back." He said without turning round. "I'm onto you...and I'm picking more chips up before we leave." He smiled to himself.
Behind him, Willie narrowed her eyes in annoyance. "You'll be fat before we leave here you know."
Daniel stuck his hand into one of the candy containers they passed and pulled out a couple of chocolate malt balls and popped them into his mouth as they walked. "I eat this stuff at home all the time."
"Uh-huh, but at home you have a gym membership, a gym in the office and other...activities to keep all that crap from going straight to your love-handles."
H e shrugged. "I'll go jogging."
"Oh yes, because you've been so motivated so far, the daily jog from the couch to the fridge and back is working wonders, truly."
He stopped and turned to her, giving her a stupid look. "Well I suppose I could always go out and meet someone to help me work out."
Wilhelmina couldn't miss the inflection of his words. "Married for under two weeks and cheating already...I'm devastated."
"You're the one whoring it up with half the town allegedly," he joked.
"Only because your balls don't work sweetheart," Willie shot back before copying him and stealing a couple of the chocolate candies.
"You just ate chocolate!" He pointed at her, wide eyed.
"I'm sublimating my sex drive." She popped another in her mouth. "And will you stop being so hung up on what I eat?"
Daniel leaned on the shelf, stopping her from moving forward and grinned at her. "Chocolate instead of sex huh? My my...who would have thought Wilhelmina Slater would be so cliché?"
"And who would of thought you would have been stupid enough to say my real name while we're out in the town when we're supposed to be hiding." She hissed, under her breath.
Daniel grimaced. "Sorry...forgot."
She leaned further over the cart, eating another candy. "How long do you suppose they'll keep us here for?"
Daniel shook his head, noncommittally. "I read a case once where this whole family were in witness protection for three years while they waited on a case to come to trial."
"Three years?" She repeated, robotically.
Daniel nodded and Wilhelmina swept a hand across the shelf, emptying it of chocolate bars, into the trolley. Daniel burst out laughing at her actions and walked into the next aisle. He scrunched up his face at the assortment of cleaning products in front of him and the various detergents on the shelf. "I suppose we should get some of this."
"You suppose right, you've been wearing the same clothes for three days...don't think I didn't notice."
"I refuse to wear plaid."
"Please convince Betty of the same."
He snickered and picked up a tub of detergent. "You even know how to work the machine?"
She stopped pushing the trolley. "And why do you assume I'll be the one doing it?"
"Well, you're the...never mind" He shut up quickly when he saw the light flash in her eyes.
"If you were about to say 'I'm the woman' you'll be wearing that detergent." She shoved the trolley hard, into him. "You go pay for this, I'm going to the counter to pick up Mode."
Daniel rubbed the spot on his hip where the cart had struck him and made his way to the check out, watching her walk away from him.
Once he had paid for, and packed without any assistance from Willie, the groceries, he walked to the front of the store and found her leaning against the door, flicking through Mode. "How ridiculous is it that I just paid for a copy of my own god damn magazine?" She asked him, without looking up.
"How is it?" He tried to snatch it from her but she held tight.
"You can have it when I'm done...it's all fine, we, sorry I, had done most of the legwork before we left, like I said."
He nodded. "So next month's the real test? God, I hope they pull it off." He tried to hand her some of the bags, to ease his burden. She looked at him quizzically before walking away carrying only the copy of Mode.
Daniel rolled his eyes and followed. "So...Liquor store?"
She nodded at him and he made his way towards the car. Wilhelmina rolled up the copy of Mode and opened her purse, she nestled it on top of the other item she had purchased while Daniel's back had been turned.
A cell phone.
xXx
"We're sorry, we're sorry, Amanda seems to think telling someone something in her head is the same as actually telling them." Betty started apologising before she was even fully in the office.
Claire smiled warmly at her: if it had been any other Editor who was tardy for a meeting she would more than likely have reprimanded them, but she found it hard to scold the young woman she and her son had become so close to. "Not to worry, you're here now. Take a seat, both of you."
Marc and Betty sat down opposite Claire, they both felt small and insignificant in the vast space of the penthouse office. The room still screamed of Bradford Meade, even now; over two years since his death. Although Alexis had used the office briefly when she had been in charge, she had preferred to spend her time in the Mode offices and since Daniel and Wilhelmina had gained control, neither of them had taken residency in the imposing room; although they expected that was less to do with feeling Bradford's presence and more to do with the fact that both were worried of what the other might do in Mode whilst there back was turned.
Claire, however, looked positively relaxed as she sat in her husband's place. She reached beneath the desk and pulled out two items, a copy of this month's Mode and the book with the mock up of next month's issue. She placed the glossy magazine on top of the book and folded her hands over them. She smiled at them both, proud of how they were handling themselves under the pressure. They may only be junior editors but they were tackling the insurmountable task before them with gusto Daniel and Wilhelmina would be proud of.
She slid her hands back and picked up the newly released issue of Mode. Wordlessly, she skimmed the pages of the publication until she came to the Mode girl on Madison piece. Her silence was unnerving both Marc and Betty, the usually amiable woman before them seemed suddenly more formidable to them than ever. "Who edited this piece?" Claire asked quietly, not looking at them and an unreadable expression on her face.
Marc cleared his throat. "I did," he offered meekly, unsure if he wanted to admit to it at all.
Claire looked up at him surprised. "You did?" She arched her brow and closed the magazine. "I admit, I thought it would have been Betty."
"Well she did proof it for me and trim a little something herself."
Claire stared them both down for a couple of seconds before allowing herself a smile. "In that case, well done, both of you."
The pair visibly relaxed. "Now don't get too complacent." Claire pulled the mock up from underneath the magazine and opened it with a thud. "Next month's issue is sparse to say the least. We have the centre spread covered thanks to the Valentino gowns you recovered, Marc; you're in charge of the shoot. Daniel and Wilhelmina completed the cover when they were downtown." She fell silent for a moment as she thought of the predicament that had presented itself shortly after the shoot.
Marc and Betty looked sideways at each other but snapped their gazes back to Claire when she cleared her throat. "Now I understand we lost our interview? I realise it was for the greater good but it leaves us in a quandary, if Isabella have Meryl Streep, we are going to need an equally big name; I'm talking Aniston, Pitt or Jolie big."
Betty swallowed, aware that it was her task to secure the interviewee, she didn't know how she would do it, but she hadn't shirked from a challenge yet. "I'm on it." She nodded, curtly.
Claire continued. "Now Marc, you and I will be meeting with reps from design houses over the next week to decide which pieces to showcase. Our 'real life piece' I can sort out, I'll have some ex-con tell us how she turned her life around, Wilhelmina will hate that." She smirked. "Now with ad's and our regular features such as Mode girl, and quick and easy tips. We have pretty much everything covered...with the exception of one thing, and I must say, it creates a problem."
"What is it?" Betty asked.
Claire inhaled deeply and leaned back in the chair, drumming her nails on the desk, and fixed Marc with a stare. "It's Wilhelmina's turn."
Marc paled. "Oh God." He brought his hand to his forehead as his head slumped on his chest. Betty looked between the two of them in confusion. "Wilhelmina's turn...what?"
Marc spun his head around. "The letter from the Editor."
Betty shrugged. "So? You said yourself, you can inject Wilhelmina's voice into the magazine, can't you just write it and-"
Marc sat bolt upright in the chair. "NO! Sure I can throw in a couple of scathing remarks throughout the articles but this...this is Willie's letter we're talking about. You've read them, there's no way I can pull it off. Plus, even if I could, no doubt whatever I said she would say the opposite, even if she agreed, just to spite me. And we're back to Willie hunting me down the second she gets outta there." He slumped back and took a deep sucking breath.
"But under the circumstances, I'm sure she'd understand you did the best you could."
Marc shook his head and laughed. "After almost four years...you do know Wilhelmina Slater, right?"
Betty looked to Claire for validation but the older woman merely smirked, in obvious agreement with Marc. "Look we have just over three weeks until we absolutely must have the letter. Let's worry about that bridge when we come to it and focus on the rest of the issue until then."
Betty and Marc both nodded, feeling much heavier than they had when they came in.
xXx
"What the..." Daniel smacked the top of the washing machine as it made an ungodly sound and shook violently underneath the counter in the small utility room. "...hell?" It continued to rumble and Daniel kept up his futile tactic of hitting it into submission. "Stop it!" He hissed at the inanimate object. He was quickly regretting deciding to do the laundry, having only deciding to do so after the comment he almost made at the market.
The machine suddenly whirred as if it was about to take off and the shuddering increased violently; the appliance now bouncing off the ground. "Shit...mother of...STOP!" He grasped onto the top of it and tried to hold it fast to the ground. All this did was cause a horrendous gurgling noise, he looked down just as torrents of water, thick with soap suds, spewed out the seal around the door.
His eyes widened as his feet instantly began slipping in the soapy mess. "Fuck, fuckity fuck fuck fuck! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!" He hit the stop button repeatedly to no avail. "WILLIE!" He bellowed for her, over the cacophony of the machine. After ten or so seconds, with no reply and ever increasing amounts of water splurging from the machine, he tried again. "WILHELMINA!"
"What?" Came the exasperated voice in the background.
Daniel craned his neck to peer out the door, into the kitchen, and saw her saunter into the room, her nose buried in Mode and a half eaten bar of chocolate in her hand, oblivious to his predicament.
"You think you could give me a hand!" He snapped at her. She unwillingly tore her gaze away from her bible and looked at him. Quite possibly the most genuine smile he had ever seen on her sprung to her face as she took in the sight of him. "It's not funny!"
Willie walked to the edge of the counter, directly opposite the opening to the utility room, and hopped up on the counter. "Oh it is." She grinned widely, taking another bite of chocolate and crossing her legs, amused beyond the telling of it.
"Damn it Willie!"
"What do you want me to do exactly?" She shrugged, bordering on laughter.
"I don't know, make it stop!" As he spoke those words, the machine gave one last shudder and emitted a loud bang, ceasing all movement.
"Problem solved." Willie sounded almost disappointed.
Daniel took a tentative step back and glared at the damned machine. In annoyance, he gave it a swift kick; bad move, the door sprung open and whatever water remained inside poured out around Daniel's ankles. This time, Wilhelmina gave into the laughter she had fought to conceal.
Daniel glared at her. "How did I know the one of the first times I would see you laugh, it would be at my expense?" he said, dryly.
He went to step out of the small room, the second his foot hit the floor he felt the sliminess of the detergent underneath him. His foot slipped out from under him and the rest of him swiftly followed as he landed on his back with a sound mixed between a thud and a splash. From his position on the ground he could just make out Willie clamping a hand to her mouth and he swore he heard an actual snort of laughter.
Daniel attempted to stand himself up and straight away fell back down in a sodden heap. Time after time his hands and feet refused to support him and he remained stuck on the wet floor. "You pick now to develop a sense of humour?" He shot at Wilhelmina. "Help me!"
She tilted her head, contemplating it. "That's the second time tonight you've asked for my help Meade." She jumped from the counter and walked to the door. Placing one hand on the door frame to brace herself she extended the other to Daniel.
He reached up and grabbed hold of it and she began pulling him up, just as his torso lifted from the sloshing mess, she let go and he crashed back down. "Oops." She smiled as he glared at her, annoyed at her amusement. She bit back another surge of laughter and extended her hand again. "This time, I promise."
He swung his hand up to grasp hers again, and again she used all her strength to try and pull him. Daniel, for his part, gave a sharp tug on her arm and she lost her balance and crashed down onto him. "That's what I think of your promises." He smirked.
"Asshole!" She pounded him on the chest and tried to stand, on the first attempt she again slid back down, this time hitting the floor and becoming almost as covered as him in the soapy mess. On her second attempt she fared better and used the door frame to leverage herself out of the mess. She turned round, thoroughly soaked and kicked the sole of his shoe before bending down and grabbing him by the ankles, dragging him from his watery trap.
Finally on dry ground he pulled himself to his feet and they stood looking at each other. Silently they looked each other up and down, suddenly they saw themselves as any other outsiders would see them. Normally pristine and well groomed, now dishevelled and soaked from head to toe, in a first for both of them, they burst into shared laughter.
"I'll get cleaned up...you get all the awful things you refuse to wear and use it to soak up this mess." Willie turned to leave the room and Daniel smiled at the squelching sounds her shoes made on the floor.
"Willie?" She stopped and faced him. "Are you eating tonight? I was gonna attempt to cook."
She smirked. "I think you've had enough run-ins with kitchen appliances tonight. Plus, you've already tried to drown me, I don't think I could take that and food poisoning in one night."
"Well what then? Are you gonna cook?" He asked, with his eyebrows arched.
She scoffed. "Dear God no...I've still got that meal I scammed out that restaurant. The number is in the drawer, see if they deliver."
Daniel walked to the kitchen drawers and opened them, locating the number. "What do you want?" He shouted after her, hearing her make her way out the kitchen.
"Something expensive!"
xXx
"Oh my God, I'd forgotten what good food tasted like." Willie said, satisfied as she dropped the fork on her plate, two hours later. They sat at the table inside the kitchen, with the French doors open to relieve the stifling heat in the room and help dry the mess Daniel made with the laundry.
"Mmm Hmm" Daniel agreed through a mouthful of food as he used his fork to spear her leftover steak and move it to his own plate. "Shame the said can't be said for the wine we picked up," he mumbled.
Willie snickered then grimaced as she took another sip from the glass, choking on the acrid taste. "Well you would try and save money, I told you ten dollars for a GALLON was never gonna be a good thing."
He laughed around a mouthful of the steak he had stolen. "You know how you get it to taste better?" He asked.
"How?"
He picked up the gigantic jug and poured it into her goblet. "Drink more." He topped up his own glass then clinked it against hers before taking a large gulp. "God...that's disgusting." He laughed, but it didn't put him off taking another slug from the glass.
When he put the glass down, he became aware of Wilhelmina staring at his profile. "What?" he asked, her, moving to meet her quizzical stare.
She pursed her lips. "I'm forgetting how to hate you."
Daniel's eyes widened and he sat back in the chair. "Wow...and all it took was three and a half years of fighting, witnessing a murder and then being forced to live together as man and wife by the government...who knew it would be so easy?" He joked and they both laughed lightly, taking bigger mouthfuls from the cheap ass wine that was starting to taste palatable.
"Seriously though...you think it'll last? Us getting along I mean. You think we'll manage it when we're back at work?"
She shrugged. "Who knows, probably not. You'll have your Mommy to remind you what a monster I am and no doubt you'll do something to piss me off within an hour of us getting back."
"An hour? It's getting shorter." He grinned.
"I'm being generous." She smiled back, leaning over the table to open the last package on the table, containing a chocolate cake large enough for four people. She slid it towards her and picked up 2 forks, passing one to Daniel and taking a chunk out the side with her own.
He laughed. "How much chocolate is that now?"
"Shut up." She took a bite and let her eyes roll back in her head.
"How's the substitute working out for you?" He teased her.
"Leave me alone, you think I haven't noticed the handful of candy bars you pigged out on earlier?" She joked back. "Don't pretend that the man whore isn't hard up."
He watched her stab the dessert in front of her, playing with the food on the plate. He was pretty damn sure that this was a sight he would not be met with once they got back to their lives. It was a pity, he could learn to like this woman, if she would only let her come out more often. He had seen her be funny, sociable and even thoughtful, to a certain extent. Once you took away the fight and the ambition he could see what his one time friend Connor had seen.
"You know..." He looked away and busied himself with a forkful of cake. "There is an obvious solution."
She chuckled, still engrossed in the plate before her. "Oh yeah that's right, our open marriage."
"Actually...more obvious than that." He couldn't look at her.
Wilhelmina slowly turned her head to face him. "Say what now?"
Clearing his throat, and with real effort, he looked at her. He nodded his head towards her and then tilted it back, indicating himself. She let her jaw slacken slightly, huffing out an incredulous laugh. "You're not serious, are you after a repeat of what I did to you in the elevator?"
"More like...what I did to you."
Her eyes were wide and she began to look vaguely around the room, searching for something to focus on except what she was hearing. "I'm cutting you off." She moved the alcohol away from him.
"I mean...out here, it's just us, but not us us. Who would ever know? Plus..." He smirked, enjoying that he was aggravating her, no matter the outcome. "...we are married."
Wilhelmina shot him a look and stood abruptly, the scraping of the chair echoing in the sudden stillness of the room. She pushed herself away from the table and slammed her napkin down on the surface. Daniel rolled his eyes. "C'mon Willie I was joking...it was a joke." He tried to convince her, and himself.
Instead of storming from the room, she walked to the French doors and slid them closed, turning to lean her back against them once she heard them click shut. Daniel screwed up his face. "What are you doing?" he asked, stupidly and she smirked at him. He had seen many smirks and sneers on her face, but never this particular one. He felt himself growing nervous as it widened on her face.
"Well, we don't want the neighbours to hear us, do we?"