CHAPTER FIVE: THE BOOK CALLED ABSURD

When they wake up, they realize that they are in a little town, that has been deserted. All around them are shops selling what appears to be a man with a huge head. Written in scrawly letters on the stone wall is the words "Shrek was here".

Shrek: (appears) End of story, bye bye. See you later! (pauses) Orges are like onions! (disappears)

Harry: Gotcha!

Numair: (gets up and walks over to an interesting box) Look, there's a button on it! (presses it and a clicking noise is heard)

Sakura: It's a bomb!!!

All of a sudden the doors on the box fling open, revealing a herd of cows wearing school uniforms.

Bremen: Holy cow!

Vanyel: That ain't logical! The teacher is a bull!

Legolas: That's bull$!

The cows -and bull- open their crud-filled mouths and begin to sing to the tune of "Bill Nye the Science Guy", saying all the names of the group.

Singing Cattle: Bill Nye the Science Guy! Bremen the Really Old Guy!

Skull Bearers: Old Man!!!

Singing Cattle: Walker the Reluctant Guy! Legolas the Shining Guy!

Solo Cow: Who likes to swear!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Singing Cattle: Harry The Turnip Guy! Sakura the Bambi Guy!

Sakura: GIRL I'M A GGGGGGIIIIRRLLLL!!!

Singing Cattle: Yue the Long-Haired Guy! Numair the Pink Robe Guy! Tay the Girl-Name Guy!

Tay: How did you know?

Singing Cattle: Allanon the Crazy Guy! Ahren the Marshmallow Guy! Truls the...BOY!

Truls: What? The Boy?!

Singing Cattle: Bambi the Jumping Guy!

Bambi: (pops up) Yaaaaooooo!

Singing Cattle: Kerriibow the Strange Noise Guy!Skull Bearers the Minion Guys!

Skull Bearers: We're plural YAY!

Singing Cattle: Zakanafein...the Guy!

Solo Cow: Science Rules!!!

Background music is heard: Da nananana Da nananana!

Singing Cattle: Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill Nye the Science Guy!!!!!

Box closes. Everyone stands in shock and a flash goes off. A group of people walks by while they are staring.

Person 1: ( Talking to friend ) So , what are you going to be for Halloween?

Person 2: I thinking about being a sock. Halloween in seven days.

They walk on by. As they pass, there is yet another blinding flash from the strange box. Faintly, the sound of Bill! Bill! Bill! is heard.