AN:
Hey, babes. I don't own Star Wars. Note about time, just assume that unless I put a time jump or some indication that it's the same day in bold at the beginning of the chapter it's been one day. Each chapter is a separate day.
Just a warning, I'm going on vacation starting tomorrow. I will continue to post updates, but they will not have been run through Grammarly because I will be posting and writing them on my tablet instead of my laptop.
One Month Later
"It's been way too long since a First Order attack. They have to be planning something big." Poe insists. "Maybe it's another Starkiller."
"No, they won't try it again. Three times is enough." General Organa insists. "I have been given intelligence that they don't seem to be planning an attack on us."
"Where from?" Please don't, Poe.
"It doesn't matter. I trust the source. They're not planning anything." Thanks, Leia. "We're safe."
"For now. We still have to move, we still have to be prepared."
"I'm not saying that we shouldn't be, I'm saying that right now we have other concerns." Leia still walks with her cane; her near-death experience has taken quite a toll on her both physically and mentally. "We need to find a new base."
I kind of zone out after that. Ben is standing on the other side of the room, just watching. While we may be able to initiate force calls, we can't stop the random ones from happening. He just watches, probably assuming that I'm in public from my ignoring him. He just stands there, watching me. I know very well that he can't hear anyone around me or see it, but being in a Resistance meeting with the leader of the First Order right there is kind of uncomfortable. "I have to go."
"What?"
"I'm sorry, General, I suddenly feel like I'm going to throw up."
"Oh, go, go. Feel better, Rey." The older woman shoos me from the command room. I still don't really know how this works, but Ben follows me.
"I hope your quarters aren't far because I'm just walking around mine right now and don't want to leave them." That's kind of funny.
"Just so that you're aware, I was in a very important meeting."
"So was I. Hux came in to beg me to warrant an attack on literally anything. That man is extremely trigger-happy."
"Do you have any clue where we are?"
"I do because of this, but the Order doesn't." Good.
"Rey!" I turn to see my roommate running up behind me. "Are you okay?"
"I'll be fine, I just feel nauseous. I occasionally have issues with space travel after not doing it my entire life."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes."
"Finn told me about him." Kriff.
"About who?" I try to play it off.
"About the General's son." Kriff.
"I swear that if you tell anyone-"
"I haven't. It's not my place. But, Rey, seriously. He's terrible. He's a horrible person. I don't understand how-"
"No, he isn't. I don't expect you or anyone to understand. Honestly, I don't understand." I honestly don't. "Rose, I know that this seems crazy and is, but we'll be able to end the war. Didn't you tell Finn, 'this is how we're going to win. Not by killing those we hate, but by saving those we love'?"
"That's different, and you know it. I saved him from a suicide mission, you're attempting to save our enemy."
"I love him." Kriff, I forgot he's here. I slowly turn to look at him…he's gone. Kriff. Either he heard that panicked and left or he was gone before I said that.
"You what?" She's thoroughly confused.
"I love him, Rose."
"Why? When? How?"
"I don't know. I can't name the hour or the day, but…I love him now."
"You're crazy."
"Maybe I am."
-oOo-
Rey.
"Ben." I blink and he's there, standing in front of me.
"How was Rose?"
"Angry, upset with me."
"She isn't going to reveal us, is she?"
"No, I got her to somewhat understand."
"Good." Either he didn't hear what I said or is desperately trying not to push it. "What do you have there?"
"My sketchbook. Leia gave it to me and the pencils."
"You draw?"
"Yes, I do."
"May I see?"
"Am I floating?" He shakes his head. "Then sit down."
We flip through, page by page, looking at the different portraits I've drawn of every person in the Resistance.
"That's what she looks like now?" Ben asks once we reach a drawing of his mother.
"Yes." He lightly touches the drawing, copying it to his memory.
"Seven years is a long time."
"Ben." He quickly flips to the next page, a drawing of Rose and Finn. She's wearing Finn's jacket and they're curled up on a couch.
Poe in his helmet and flight suit.
BB8.
Chewbacca.
Porg.
Porg.
Porg.
Two porgs.
Han…Ben quickly flips the page on that one.
Porg.
BB8 and porg.
Threepio.
Lieutenant Connix.
Kylo Ren with his mask.
"Why?"
"I don't know." He flips to the next page and sees a drawing of his actual face before I sliced it up.
"Not accurate anymore."
"Then I should draw another one." I take the book from him and flip to the next blank page. "Look at me."
Review Replies:
Alright, too many of you have been asking about the Ben Solo is a virgin thing, so I will address that here: In an interview with the LA Times he was asked if Kylo Ren had ever kissed a girl before, and Adam Driver apparently had also asked this question, Rian Johnson replied that maybe he had. Maybe. And if there isn't even confirmation that this boy has kissed someone, then there's no way he's fucked someone. Goodbye, that fanon.
Chapter 4:
Alysia Of The Pen: Yeah, that's just kind of tedious. She trusts Finn more than anyone and is in need of allies during this.
SqueakyDolphin6: He hates Kylo, but trusts Rey and her judgment, especially now that she is the last Jedi. If Rey is doing something, she has to have a good reason for it.
Chapter 5:
where she went: Good.
Dream-Runaway: I think he would try really hard. He's already fucked everything up so many times, he wants to get things right with them.
WeasleyIsMyKing540: Thank you!
Magenta Brave: Same.
The Apocryphal One: I can't believe that that is the line everyone is latching onto. Thank you! Yeah, too much talk of balance for it not to go anywhere. I think that they're going to complete Anakin's prophecy of bringing balance to the Force.
phhsdj: Yeah, you'll get that conversation later.
cresswellshipper17: TLJ was a strange mixture of humor and seriousness, so I'm trying to keep it up.
Lisa Tucker: THANK YOU
AV: I am.
Sysamon: I am upset with how attracted I am to Adam Driver. I know I shouldn't be, he's sixteen years older than me and married, but damn. Anyway, thank you.
Ali D: They're most definitely that.
Princess Force: I have been on this boat for two years and you will have one Hell of a time trying to get me off.
Jen P Conn: Thanks! Look above the actual replies for your answer.
Alysia Of The Pen: Our large, innocent, thirty-year-old child.
Sherona849: See above the actual replies for your answer.
SqueakyDolphin6: Third kiss. First Force-Bond kiss. Neither of them has done this before, they don't know what to do.
Delirium0629: Thanks, babe!