Mikado sighed as he waited outside Izaya's apartment. He didn't understand why the man called at such an odd hour. Masaomi had still been sleeping so he moved Masaomi over to his futon and left him a note.

He leaned against the wall, waiting for the informant's welcome. Izaya came bouncing down the hallway, grinning like a madman. "Ah, Mikado-kun~ I may have gotten some interesting information for you~" he said excitedly, opening the door to his apartment and hanging up his coat, sliding off his shoes.

Mikado followed cautiously behind him, only being here a few times. It looked quite normal, even if it was the insane broker's living space. "About Masaomi?"

Izaya grinned, back still turned to the dark-haired boy. "Mikado-kun~" he started, "what do you think Masaomi loves most in this world?"

Mikado blushed brightly at the comment, reliving Masaomi's slumber confession. He gulped, "uh...girls?" he said nervously.

Izaya laughed at the comment, turning around to face the blue-eyed boy. "You," his grin spread across his face as he noticed Mikado's nervous stance. "Now, you're a smart boy~" he began, "so...you would know that Masaomi seems to be a very emotionally-challenged person, right?" He said, before continuing. "I mean, his parents leave him because he's rebelling. He's on his own. Do they even really care anymore? Do they even really love him?" He states, "so...even if he gives off a facade about how he is the most confident, happiest boy in the world. He's still hurting. He's still hurting because the people who gave him life – are now gone. They've run off and it's his fault."

Mikado frowned, not knowing how long this tirade would go on for Izaya, but he listened intently. Anything this man could say would have a point to the subject at hand.

"He starts a gang to get a sense of comfort. A family. One he started on his own. It was his family. Meet yours truly. I provide him with a girlfriend. He seems to have everything now. His own family. His own love. I am become the current role model in his life. However, it's not really my style – so I ruin everything, leaking information to the Blue Squares for fun~" he says.

"Now, he leaves his gang. His girlfriend is in the hospital. The one role model in his life since his parents left is a terrible person, and that just leaves one person to rely on," Izaya turned to face Mikado, "his lonely, conserved, childhood friend back in Saitama~" He smirked, "only to find out that his quiet, conserved little friend to be a gang leader of one of the biggest groups in Ikebukero."

Mikado sighed heavily, getting tired of the broker's seemingly endless rant. "What is your point?"

Izaya smiled playfully, "I hoped you would ask~" he said. "His parents abandon him, but he still calls and visits and keeps in touch. I ruin his life, he ends up working for me. You're both involved in one of the biggest gang fights in the city and you're still friends. He associates pain with love, therefore~"

Mikado's eyes went wide, "he loves his rapist," he concludes in realization, "but you just said-"

"he loves you," Izaya finished. "I did," he said simply.

Mikado frowned, narrowing his blue eyes into dancing red ones. "What are you implying?"

"I'm not implying anything~" Izaya said smoothly, smiling over at him. Mikado frowned in response. Izaya chuckled softly, "quite defensive, aren't we, Mikado-kun~"

Mikado clenched his teeth together, forming a fist at his side. "You would be the rapist before I ever would," he spat, glaring darkly up at the informant.

"Oooh~ strong words. I have an idea~!" Izaya said, seeming unphased by the whole accusation. "Why don't we just go ask Masaomi-kun who raped him?"

"He wouldn't tell us at the therapists office, why would he tell us now?" Mikado frowned.

"Yes, well, we didn't ask him specifics. We just asked the basics. Why don't we go ask if you raped him, or if I did~ but I'm really not worried about myself since I know I didn't do it."

"...Fine."

Masaomi woke up on the futon. He blinked his eyes open, looking around the familiar room he'd been living in for a couple of months. "Mikado?" He asked, sitting up. He frowned when he didn't get a immediate response. He slowly stood up from the futon, rubbing his eyes tiredly. "Mikado?" He tried again, and noticed a note on his friend's desktop.

Masaomi,

I went out to get a few things. I'll be back soon.

Love

-Mikado.

Masaomi tilted his head at the word that had seemed to be scratched out, frowning slightly. He sighed heavily, holding his head. It was pounding. He had that dream again. It was an awful, re-occuring dream of Mikado raping him. Did that really happen? He...he wouldn't. Would he?

He sighed, moving into the bathroom to get some aspirin, and filled the cup by the sink up with water. When he came back to Ikebukero, Masaomi had hoped things would go back to the way they were. He would still meet up with Mikado, tease him about not confessing to Anri yet, flirt with Anri, play video games with Mikado, drag him along with his skirt-chasing escapades. Maybe it was hopeful wishing on Masaomi's part. Nothing ever stays the same. Life moves on whether you run away from it or not.

When Masaomi finally returned, he saw a side of Mikado he hadn't seen before. He ran a hand through his blonde locks, before pulling out two pills and threw them back in his mouth, downing the water and pills.

Pills.

Masaomi stared hard at the orange bottle in front of him. It would end this pain. He wouldn't need to love so he wouldn't feel any pain. He wouldn't feel any pain because he wouldn't need to love.

He quickly rummaged rummaged through the cabinet and pulled out any pills he could find. He mixed a fistful of them into his hand. His breathing became shaky, "I don't want to hurt anymore." he said, throwing his head back and swallowing the pills.

A/N: Don't forget to R&R! :)