I don't own degrassi.

"Maya?" He said confused. "In the flesh" the young girl said happily.

"I thought you were on vacation?" he asked accusingly.

"My dad got food poisoning, so our family fun road trip was cut short." She said jokingly.

"Who's your friend?" She asked Cam gesturing toward me.

"Oh, right. Maya this is Randall's daughter Clare. She just moved in with us." Cam said awkwardly. The girl smiled at me, and held her hand out for me to shake. I shake her hand, but still don't know who she is other than "Maya".

Cam paused a moment, and took a deep breath. "And Clare this is Maya, my…" He took another breath, and struggled with his next words "my girlfriend".

"Oh" I said shocked. "It's nice to meet you" I said with a fake smile. I felt my eyes well up with tears, and decided I had to go. "I'm gonna go find your mom" I said trying to get myself back to the level ground. My foot slipped on the last rock, but I caught myself on another rock. I left anxiously, and ran off quickly after making it to land.

How could sweet little Campbell do this to me? I think for a moment, and remember that I had caused this. I clearly said that we couldn't be together, and then made out with him. I think at the time we had spent together on the last few days, and how even today he said so many things that implied he liked me. He had to know that I liked him. It was obvious. Why didn't he tell me he had a girlfriend? I would have understood, and stopped spending so much time with him. I think that maybe this is a good thing. I can move on from my stupid crush on my way to young for me almost step brother. Despite thinking this the tears continue to blur my vision, and I run to an empty bench, and crouch down behind it to cry. I bawl my eyes out for a good 10 minutes, before two boys sit on the bench. I compose myself to the best of my ability, and stand up. The boys turn and look at me as I stand up.

"Are you alright?" One of them asks.

I nod my head, and start to walk away. He follows me, and grabs my shoulder. "Are you sure?" he asks me seeming confused.

"Yes." I choke out.

"Well, since we are talking kind of. I'm Eli. What's your name?"He asks. I hesitate on whether or not to tell him because he is a bit scary looking. He has black hair, and is wearing black shorts, and a gray t-shirt adorned with a band logo. It appears that he is wearing eye liner, but I'm not positive. His friend was still sitting on the bench. They were both no taller than 5'6, and were scrawny.

"Clare" I say quietly.

"It's nice to meet you Clare." He says confidently with a smirk.

I have to admit that his confidence is kind of appealing, but I don't really know what to say.

I don't have to think for long because before I know it he turns around, and walks away. I follow him.

"What was that?" I ask him confused.

"What was what?" he asks knowing exactly what I was talking about.

"That… I don't know what to call it. Dialogue?" I ask a little annoyed.

"What about it?" he asked smirking.

"Do you walk up to random people, and start talking often?" I asked very annoyed.

"Only when they are crying actually" He said kind of jokingly.

"Oh…" I say almost forgetting that I had been crying behind a bench. I turn around, and walk away.

I go looking for Kathleen where the blanket was a couple of hours earlier, and find her, and my father.

"Hey Clare!" My dad said. Luckily it was dark because I was almost positive that my eyes were puffy, and my mascara was smeared.

"Hi dad. Work emergency fixed?" I said as happily as I could.

"Yep. I've been here for a couple hours. I'm surprised you guys didn't come back earlier."

"Where is Campbell?" Kathleen asked concerned.

"With Maya? Is that her name? I don't remember, but he is with his little girlfriend" The words didn't feel right coming out in such a happy tone, but I had to cover up any feelings I had for him.

"Oh…" Kathleen said. Well it's starting to get late. We are going to be leaving in about 10 minutes. I tried calling him, but his phone is dead. Do you think you could go find him, and meet us at the exit?"

I nod my head "Sure…" I say nervously.

I walk back to the rock area, and it takes me about 5 minutes. I look down to where Cam and I had been sitting just hours before, and I see Maya making out with him. I feel a wave of jealousy run over my body, and feel the need to rip her face off. I clear my throat loudly to get their attention. They turn around and look at me. Maya gives me an irritated look like I am interrupting their special moment and Cam's expression looks like he is saying sorry with his eyes.

"Your mom and my dad are ready to go" I say rudely letting my jealousy get the best of me.

I turn around, and walk away slowly waiting for Cam to catch up with me. He runs over to me, and waves goodbye to Maya who was still on the rocks.

"Why didn't you tell me you had a girlfriend?" I say to him accusingly as we walk away.

"I'm sorry Clare, but it's not like this is my fault. You said nothing could happen between us, but then you make out with me, and then… I don't know. The whole thing is really confusing," he says upset.

"Well nothing can happen between us, but that doesn't change the fact that… I wish something could." I say irritated.

"You do?" Cam asks sincerely as he stops in front of me.

"Yes, isn't it obvious?" I say annoyed, and almost yelling at him.

"No, not really… I suck at all things girl related." He says back to me a lot calmer.

He starts laughing uncontrollably. "What is wrong with you?" I ask him irritated.

"This whole thing is just crazy and stupid. I like you and you like me."

"It's not stupid Campbell. Everything is ruined!" I say as I walk in front of him to get away from the conversation.

We get closer to the exit. Cam rides home with my dad, and Kathleen asks me to ride with her. I agree, but expect an awkward car ride.

"So Clare, how do you like it here so far?" she asks me a few minutes after pulling out of the lot.

"It's a nice place. It's been really nice to get to see my dad." I say with a fake smile.

There is an awkward silence, and I decide to end it. "So, when is the wedding?"

She smiles widely, and responds excitedly "November 20th, and that reminds me…" she says with a really large grin.

"Will you be one of my bridesmaids? I know it's asking a lot, but it would really mean a lot to your father and me if you would be in the wedding."

I smile at her happiness. It was really contagious. She really was a kind person. She may get stern with Campbell sometimes, but that's only because she cares. She makes my dad so much happier than I had ever seen him. I snap out of my thought, and remember that she is waiting for a reply

"I would love to." I say nodding and smiling.

"Really? That is so wonderful Clare. Thank you." She says joyfully.

I laugh at her. "I imagine you will walk with Campbell since he is a groomsman. I just can't wait for you to meet the whole family."

I nod awkwardly at the first part, and give a less than genuine smile at the second part.

"Clare you are just so great. I'm so glad you moved in with us."

I really don't know what to do around her other than smile, so that's what I do. We get back to the house, and she pulls into the driveway. We arrive there before my dad and Cam, so I head straight to my room in hopes that I can avoid him for the night.

I sit down on my bed, and take out my phone. I dial Alli's number, and press call. I needed someone to talk to about this whole Cam thing, and I didn't know Lucy well enough yet to tell her something like that.

"Hey Clare!" she answers after the first ring.

"Hi Alli. I have to talk to you about something."

"Okay" she laughs "shoot"

"Well, the last three days have been a roller coaster. I was expecting to leave the drama back home, but apparently that just can't happen."

"What happened? Was your date that bad?" she asks concerned.

"I cancelled the date… This is about something way worse."

"Oh my gosh you're killing me, what is it?" she asks.

"Well I made a mistake, and I'm worried that I screwed this up already."

"Clare, just tell me what happened?"She says anxiously.

"Did I tell you about Campbell?" I ask.

"Only that his friend asked you out, why?"

"Well he is fourteen years old, and I kind of made out with him after I talked to you my first night here." I say

"Clare! You are turning sixteen next month, and not to mention he is going to be your step brother!" she said shocked

"Alli, I know it was a mistake, but I can't stop thinking about it. I like him a lot."

"Clare you sound disgusting right now. I mean at least you dated Jake before your parents started dating. You didn't meet this guy or should I say this boy until you found out he was going to be your step brother."

"I know…" I say sadly "and then today he was being so sweet and then kind of cheesy, but in a good way. And then… Alli get this… He has a girlfriend!" I say a little too loudly.

"Not trying to burst your bubble, but it's probably for the best. You can't like him. He's your step brother!" she said harshly.

"Not yet technically" I say defending my cause.

"Clare, be serious. Nothing can happen!"She says irritated

"Alli, you don't know what I'm going through. He's really cute!" I said to loudly once again.

"I don't care if he is the cutest guy on the planet. It's not a good idea" she says

I take a deep breath, and say the inevitable "You're right, but that doesn't change what I am feeling."

"Well, move back to Toronto then. We all miss you a lot." She says nicely "Especially KC!"

I roll my eyes at the sound of his name. I was thinking about it before she brought him up. For some reason unknown to me Alli thinks that I should take KC back after he cheated on me with the whore.

"Alli, why do you always bring him up?" I say meanly.

"Because you guys are just so perfect" she says convincingly.

"I don't even care about him anymore. I don't think I ever did" I say honestly.

"Fine… you should still come back!"

"That is exactly why I can't, Alli. Despite all of my issues here, I can't face my entire past again. I made so many mistakes at home, and I can't go back" I say like it should be obvious.

I hear her sigh loudly. "What am I supposed to do without my best friend?" she says sadly.

"I don't know Alli. I miss you a lot too, but I can't go back. Maybe you could come visit me?" I say nicely.

"Like my parents would ever let me leave the country by myself" She says annoyed.

"It's not like I'm in France Alli. I moved a three hour drive away. And your parents love me. You have a passport, and maybe if I can talk my dad into it you could visit."

"That would be awesome and all, but we are forgetting one thing. School starts in a few weeks." She says trying to make me think realistically. I was having issues with that here. I was losing all of my common sense, and I have no clue why.

"Well… maybe you could visit over a holiday break. You don't celebrate most of them anyway." I say optimistically.

"If I can talk parents into it, I would love to visit you Clare. I have to go though. I'm supposed to be getting ready for bed".

"Bye Alli" I say laughing at the sound of her mother yelling in the background. Her parents are really strict, but luckily they think I'm a good influence on Alli. If they knew what had made me want to move down here they would never let Alli talk to me again, but they don't, and there is a chance that Alli will be allowed to visit.

I hang up the phone, and realize that Alli hadn't helped me figure out what to do at all. I am in a mess, and I have no clue how to get out of it. I would love to just pretend that Cam and I never kissed, and that there was nothing between us, but I can't.

"Clare" I hear Cam say from just behind my door. I roll my eyes, and get angry.

"What?" I say harshly. He replies with a simple "Can I come in?"

I walk to the door, and open it ruthlessly. He sees that I am mad, and has a scared face while he walks in and sits on the bed.

"Clare, I'm sorry." He says sincerely.

I take a deep breath to relieve my expression of some of its anger. "It's okay. I don't care." I say with a lot less anger.

"But I care" he says sadly. "I'm breaking up with Maya tomorrow. I don't like her the way I like you, and I know that doesn't mean anything will happen with us, but I wish it…"

"Stop!" I interrupt. "Campbell. I don't know what to say other than it was all a mistake. You are going to be my step brother really soon, and I'm almost two years older than you. Can we just put all of that behind us?" I say trying to hold myself together.

"I heard you on the phone Clare. I know that you are just as confused as I am" he says not believing my previous statement.

"You listened to me on the phone! That is a total invasion of my privacy!" I say angrily.

"Well be quieter! My room is across the hall, not on the moon." He says to defend himself.

I roll my eyes, and he gets up off of the bed. "You said I was 'really cute'" He says smiling and mocking me at the same time.

"You're a real jerk! And if that is what you came to say, get out!"

"It's not" he says walking closer to me. "I came to tell you that the last couple days have been great, and that I don't think I can stop liking you. I don't want to stop liking you" At this point he was inches from my face. His lips were inches from my lips and getting closer. I could feel his breath against my lips, and I wanted nothing more than to lean in just two inches and kiss him. I stood my ground, and looked into his eyes harshly trying to make him back away, but he didn't.

He pressed his perfectly soft lips against mine, and cupped my face with his hands. I kissed him back for a few moments before hearing a noise in the house and pushing him away quickly, and my face gets sad.

"This is exactly why this will never work."

He looks at me with heartbreaking puppy eyes. "I haven't been happy all summer. When I'm with you I am happy. That has to count for something."

I look out the door to make sure that the sound was not one of our parents, and go over to him. I wrap my arms around him in a nonromantic way. I pull away and look at him with a smile.

"That is really sweet and all, but it just furthers my thinking that it won't work. Campbell, you obviously need some help, and we can make sure you get it, but think… If we were to give us a try, and something happened… and we were to break up… what would that do to you?"

He shakes his head not wanting to hear what I'm saying. "And I know that you are thinking that could never happen because that is what I thought when Jake and I had this conversation two years ago… The fact is it can and it will… If by the slightest chance we did work out… we still wouldn't because of the fact that our parents will be married, and would never let it happen."

I feel like with every reason I am stabbing Cam in the heart. He is practically in tears, but I need to stay strong. It is really hard to see him like this, and to know that I am the reason he is so sad.

"Cam…" I say sadly as the tears fall down his face.

He wipes his tears, and walks out of the room sadly. A part of me knows he needs space, but another part of me thinks that I just broke his heart and that he was going to hurt himself again. I decide that I can't take chances in the matter, and walk into the hall. His door is already closed, and I can hear him crying from the outside. "Cam". I don't hear a reply, but can still hear crying.

"Cam, can I come in." I say feeling like I'm going to cry. He still doesn't reply.

"Cam I'm coming in" I say as I feel a tear streaming down my face. I open the door, and see Campbell in the corner of the room holding the razor, but not actually cutting. When he sees me coming in he presses the blade against his skin.

"Cam, don't" He drops the blade, and puts his head in his hands crying really hard.

I sit down next to him on the floor, and put my arm around him. "Cam…" I say feeling sorry for him.

He rocks himself back and forth on the floor for a few minutes, and I rub his back trying to calm him.

Once he is done crying he looks at me. "I'm sorry" he says sadly.

I continue to rub his back, and don't say anything. "I almost broke the promise"

I lean my head on his shoulder, and move my hands to his. I hold his hand trying to comfort him further. I don't realize it at the time, but it's kind of crossing multiple step-brother/step-sister relationship boundaries.

"It's fine because you didn't" I say smirking at him sweetly.

He stands up, and pulls me up afterward. He doesn't let go of my hand after I stand up. Instead he pulls me close to him, and tries to initiate a third kiss between us. He leans his head in and pushes his lips against mine. Despite my better judgment I don't pull away. Instead I move my lips with his at a moderate pace.

He deepens the kiss by sticking his tongue in my mouth. I go with it, and keep kissing him now moving my tongue in his mouth as well. He puts his arms around me, and leans down until I am forced to fall on the bed. He doesn't pull away from the kiss the entire time.

He lies on top of me kissing me more intensely then I have ever been kissed. I feel my head getting dizzy from the lack of oxygen going into my mouth, and pull away. I take a deep breath and start panting. He flips over and lies next to me panting as well. We had been kissing for quite a while, and needed to catch our breath. After about a minute of lying next to him on the bed I lean over, and start kissing him again. I roll over on top of him this time, and kiss him very passionately. We make out for another ten minutes, and I straddle him again.

This time when I look down I don't see a terrified Cam, I see a Cam who looks at me like I am perfect, a boy who really likes me. It is obvious that he wants me to keep going so I do. I know that it's wrong, and I know I said I wouldn't, but when I'm kissing him everything feels so perfect.

I lean down, and keep making out with him while my hands go for his shirt. I pull away from the kiss, and force his blue t-shirt off of him. I lean back down, and nibble on his bottom lip while I feel his bare chest with my hands. I sit back up, and take off my blue striped button up, and fling it across the room. I then proceed to take of my tank top leaving me with only a plain white bra. I lean back down, and kiss him even more passionately. I sit back up again, and his eyes get wide. I struggle with my bra clasp, and smile down at him sweetly. "Hold on just a sec". I bite my lip, and continue to fiddle with it until it is eventually undone. I toss the bra into the mess that is Cam's room. He looks up at me lustfully. I lean back down and kiss him some more. I move my fervent kisses down to his neck, and then realize that I left a hickey on his neck.

"Shit!" I say sitting up, and covering my mouth with my hand.

"What?" he asked worriedly. Why did you stop?"

"We are screwed. I left a hickey on your neck

His face got worried as I climbed off of him, and he got up. He ran to the mirror above his dresser, and stared at the hickey on his neck. "My mom is going to kill me."

I put my tank top on, and gather my things. "We can't tell her the truth. We can't tell anyone."

"What am I supposed to say about this?" He said worried pointing to his neck.

"I don't know. Tell your mom that your little girlfriend did it." I said remembering the blonde girl.

"You want me to blame Maya? She is not that kind of girl. She's sweet and nice." He says explaining why his mother would never believe him.

"What's that supposed to mean? Am I not nice?" I say offended.

"No, you are. That's not what I meant…" he said trying to fix what he had said.

"I know exactly what you meant. You think I'm a whore, don't you?" I say with a nervous face.

"No, of course not. You're just different from her… Don't you see we have bigger issues here?"

"Right" I say pointing at him. I pace around, and think about any other options.

"You could wear a turtle neck?" I say not being serious.

"It's 90 degrees outside, so no!" He says putting an end to that idea.

"I wasn't being serious." I say starting to smile.

"Well we have to be. What do we tell our parents?"

"Well, your mom didn't drive you home from that thing, and it was dark. You could have had a hickey then. Maya is capable of giving you a hickey even if it is out of character. I say you stick with that story. You don't have much of a choice."

"I guess you're right. Who knows, maybe it'll go away before she even notices. She does have work tomorrow, she might not notice."

I smile and nod knowing that the hickey would not go unnoticed by Cams mom of the year.

"What does your mom do?" I ask curiously.

"She's a nurse" he says with a yawn.

"Oh, she will probably notice". I smile. "I'm gonna go to bed though Cam. See you in the morning."

"Night Clare" He smiles at me. "I had a lot of fun tonight."

I turn and smile awkwardly at him, and nod. Once I get into my room I change into pajamas, and lay on my bed.

I lay there thinking about Campbell. I feel terrible that I keep confusing him, but this is not safe. I was willing to move past the things holding a possible relationship between him and I back, but I made him cheat on his girlfriend. I mean I didn't make him, but I tempted him, and sure he said he was breaking up with her, but I was her once. I know how much it hurts to be cheated on. I didn't even care about KC all that much, but still it felt like being stabbed in the heart and the back.

I'm not the only one at fault here. He initiated kisses, I just took things a lot farther than I should have. No wonder he thinks I'm a whore. I have known him three days, and already I've attempted to more or less have sex with him. He didn't seem to mind tonight though. He looked so extremely adorable when he was nervously enjoying himself tonight.

I am confused by this as much as he is. As much as I don't think that I should try to be with him, when I am around him, I can't control myself. He is so adorable, and sweet. Despite his issues that I have to tell someone about soon he is just the perfect guy for me. With both Jake and KC I was the more naïve, and less experienced one, but now with Campbell I am the leader of things, and I kind of like it. Okay I kind of love it. I yawn, and decide to go to sleep. I turn off my lamp, and drift into my slumber.

A/n: I realize this chapter is like crazy filled with confusion, but that's the point. I am trying to illustrate the flip flopping of Clares brain. She is really torn in this situation, but makes impulsive decisions, and doesn't think about the consequences until later. She is a teenager. Thank you everyone who reviewed and followed and favorited. I realize that a lot less people go for stories with not real couples, so I am really appreciative of all of you, Thank you so much, and please keep up the feed back.

PS I'm thinking Alli willl visit in the next 3 chapters. I kind of prolong days into multiple chapters, but I am trying to change that