Chapter 6
Santana's POV
Thank God for Tequila is all I can say, if i'm going to be spending the rest of my day with Glinda and Elphaba making eyes at eachother i'm sure as hell not going to be doing it sober. These two think i'm an idiot and don't notice how they look at eachother, but come on. I have a 100% accuracy rate with my gaydar, case and point Dave Karofsky. Come to think of it i'm not even sure if they're aware of how they act around eachother. OMG! They are sooooo Britts and I freshman year of high school. Well just the first week, I knew I had a keeper the second I laid eyes on my little dancing queen. God I miss britt!
Great now i'm depressed! I need another drink ... Oh hell no! The bottle is empty!
After bickering about the lack of alcohol Berry is equipt with I decide to take matters into my own hands and get more booze because lets face it, Rachel both dresses and looks like she's escaped from a kindergarden run by jewish leprechauns and Quinn,
well she can't take her puppy dog eyes off of the hobbit long enough the form a sentence let alone buy more Tequila. So with a witty comment I exit the apartment, slamming the door behind me for good measure. Although Tequila is my main concern the only thing on my mind right now is Britt, so I take out my phone and can only just make out the numbers. I guess i've had more to drink than I thought.
"Well hello there my sexy little Britt Britt" I slur down the phone.
"SANTANA!" I love how excited she gets when I call her.
"Brittany, have I told you today that I love you?" God i'm cheesey when i'm drunk.
"Twice actually, but you can keep saying it, its one of my favourite things to come out of your mouth, you wanna know my favourite thing?" Oh my God this girl is unbelievable, shes trying to start a phone sex session and as much I would love to continue this conversation it's not really a good time. Boo!
"Sweetie can I just stop you right there, I've been drinking and i'm on the street hunting for more Tequila so I can't give you my full undivided attention." Brittany makes the saddest noise i've ever heard so I think of how I can make it up to her.
"Tell you what my perfect little unicorn, once I gets my alcohol and get back home how about we do your favourite thing that you do with Lord Tubbington when he goes on kitty vacation?"
"You want me to find a new place to hide my diary so he stops reading it?" Its so damn cute how genuine this girl is.
"No ... Your other favourite thing." I give her a minute to think about it and when she gets it she almost bursts my damn ear drum.
"SKYPE!" her voice goes up an octave with excitement.
"haha yes baby we can skype because I can borrow Berry's laptop now that we're roommates." I wait again while Brittany processes what i'm saying to her.
"Yey i'm so happy you listened to me, now Rachel can sing us both to sleep at night. Just remember that i'm the only one your allowed to give your sweet lady kisses to, ok?"
"I wouldn't dream of kissing anyone other than you hun. But since you brought it up, my gaydar has picked up on a new player for our team, you ready for this one ... Rachel Berry."
"Santana I think you need to send your gaydar to the repair man if you only just realised this now."
"Hold up, what do you mean Britts?" I really don't know where shes going with this but i'm sure it'll be dead on because she really is a freaking genius!
"I've always thought Rach was like us, there was just something about the way she looked at Q, but then she started dating Finn and I thought I must have been wrong, but then her and Q sang that song about being pretty and unpretty which was really confusing for me so I just watched how they looked at eachother. They looked so sad S, like how you used to look when I was dating Artie."
"Ugh don't remind me!" I interupt and roll my eyes at how stupid I was to ever let proud mary near my lady.
"But yeh, they looked sad and then they made that super weird picture of what their babies would look like."
"Oh no, babe that was just to see what Berry would have looked like if she went through with her rediculous nose job idea."
"OK, if you say so, but I think they wanted to see what their Faberry babies would look like."
"Faberry?" I ask simply.
"Uh huh, thats what you get when you mix their second names together, cute right? Just so you know we are Brittana because I didn't like our surnames mixed together. But basically Rach totally has lady love for our little Q." This girl really does blow my mind like all the time!
"Why didn't you ever tell me about your theory?" I'm a little upset she never said anything because we tell eachother everything.
"It wasn't my secret to tell, just like it wasn't for Finn to tell yours, plus I don't think Rachel really understands what shes feeling." I really wish Brittany was here right now so I could hug her for being the nicest person on the whole planet.
Of course she would keep Rachel's secret, shes a freaking saint!
"I get it babe, I really wish I didn't have to go but talking to you is really making me sober up and I need to dull the pain of not having you around. Oh and to keep my self esteem high can we say that I called it. Rachel and Quinn I mean. Can we say it was me that called it?"
"Of course we can." There isn't a hint of sarcasm in her voice, just genuine love.
"Thanks B, I'll call you when I get back and we can get our Skype on. I love you."
"Love you lots, even more than dots." I laugh and hang up the phone, this is how Brittany loves to end all our conversations.
The girl really does love her dots, so she must really love me!
Ah man, I forgot to tell Brittany that Quinn was with us. I guess I can just surprise her and make Quinn talk to her on Skype,
not that it will take much persuading, she loves Britt. Everybody does. I guess I just started walking down random streets while I was talking to B and am relieved that just across the street from me, I see a Liqour store. I straighten myself up, pull my shirt down just enough that the ladies are on show. Screw coach sylvester, these sandbags as she so unkindly named them have been worth every cent. Anyway as I enter the store I turn into Snixx, I look like I know exactly what i'm doing and head for the Tequila. Maintaining eye contact with the pimple faced cashier I simply say "I want these" and give him the money. Of course i'm not an idiot and had my fake ID if all else failed, but Snixx never fails! So I leave the store and head back in the direction I originally came from.
I obviously took no notice of my surroundings when I was conversing with my better half, otherwise I would have took notice of the store that is right infront of me.
"No freaking way." I chuckle as I enter the costume store and knowing exactly what I want, I make my way to the desk.
"Hey, can I get some service over here." I slap my hand on the counter for good measure, to make sure I was heard.
"How can I help you?" Of course the assistant had to be a dumb ass teenager, waering suspenders of all things.
"Listen here Urkel. I want the biggest sombrero you have, i'm talking big enough to fit carrot top AND I want a poncho just like Ugly Betty's. You got all that?" I knew I was being a bitch but its not my fault, i'm coming out of my booze buzz and his face is just annoying to look at. He nods and looks a little bit scared, which of course I feed off of. In no time he returns with my shit, puts it in a bag for me and I leave before throwing the money on the counter.
I know i'm in New York, but no way in hell am I walking through the streets looking like I belong in a Mariachi band. So I wait until I get outside the apartment door and suit up! I take a swig of Tequila and burst through the door, a witty remark was on the tip of my tongue when I saw them. Faberry as Britt's so elequently named them, were lying on the couch, with their faces only inches apart. Well slap my ass and call me sally! Brittany really did call it. Damn, if I only came in a minute later I could have watched them get their mack on! Nevermind i'm sure I will in the future. I can't help myself though,
so I make a small comment before heading into the kitchen.
Quicker than I had hoped they both joined me in the kitchen. "Jeez you look like you've both been slapped with a wet fish." I hold up the tequila, hand them each a bottle, spin them around and in my best mexican accent I proclaim "Let the games begin."
They are seriously harshing my buzz and i've only been with them for five freaking minutes! As we all sit back on the couch, in silence, I turn to Rachel.
"Hey Berry, where's your laptop. I have somebody that wants to speak to you." She looks at me confused trying to think of who it could be, when Quinn downs her first of many shots tonight and shouts "It's brittany, Bitch."
"Ohhhh I miss Brittany! By all means let me just grab it from my bedroom and we can call her right away." I watch Quinn very closely as she watches Rachel leave the room. I know I only have a minute so this is gonna have to be quick.
"Ok Q, Whats the deal and don't lie to me, I know your hot for Berry and not just in a I wanna sex you up kinda way, but a feelings and shit kinda way." Wow I don't think i've spoken that fast in my life. When I look at Quinn she doesn't look angry or upset. Infact I don't think I've ever seen this look on her face before.
"Santana" Is all she says before she takes another shot "I ... I'm in love with her" We both take another shot and before I can respond to her declaration of love, the object of her affection comes bouncing back in the room and places herself in the middle of me and Quinn. Even though she directly in the middle of us I can't help but notice shes closer to Quinn than she is to me.
"What I miss?" she can sense the slight atmosphere in the air and looks to Quinn who is just staring back at her.
"Two Shots. Thats what you missed. So drink up Babs." I look to Quinn while Rachel downs her shots and she mouths 'Thank you'
to me, so I just give her the nod before turning my attention to the laptop.
"Quinn you go hide behind that couch so that you can surprise Britt and Rachel just don't be too you, ok?"
"I have no idea what you are trying to insinuate but ... "
"Can I just stop you right there, I'm not insulting you, I just want you to tone down your rediculous vocabulary for my Britt,
because sometimes when you speak she just pretends to understand and i'm not with her to explain what you mean, so for her sake would you just, please?" God I think that was the gentlest i've spoken to the little hobbit.
"Santana Lopez, who knew you were so sweet." I scoff at her but she continues anyway "For Brittany, Anything." She smiles at me, which I half return before calling Britt and tell her to turn on her Skype. After she finally figures out how to turn on her damn computer and shit, her beautiful face finally appears on the screen and ...
"JESUS BRITTANY!" I immediately push Rachel off the couch so she can't see what i'm seeing. "Baby put some clothes on, Rachel just saw your lady lumps!"
"Hey there was no need for that S!" Quinn shoots up from behind the couch, scolding me for pushing her little Berry on the floor and runs around to help her up.
"But I thought we were having sexy time skype since you cut our phone call short before. Wait? Is that Q?" I love how Britt can go from being so sad one minute to being blissfully happy the next. shes literally bouncing up and down as she throws on her spongebob squarepants robe.
"We can have cyber sexy time real soon sweetie, but first" I pause to look at the two idiots on the floor next to me and wave them back up to the couch. Quinn is helping Rachel onto the couch and treating her like I pushed her off the damn balcony. Ah young love. "I have two people who want to say Hi to you."
Taking another shot each, Q and R smile the biggest mega watt smiles at my girl through the screen. If i'm being totally honest I zone out of the conversation the three of them are having before I catch rachel saying "Its settled then." Which makes me snap back into reality.
"Whats settled?" I say shaking my head.
"Baby, Rach says I can come visit you for the weekend and we can get our cuddle on for three days straight!" I look at Berry and can't believe what i'm hearing. I'm just staring at her until she speaks up.
"I may have had an excessive amount of Tequila .." She stops when Quinn clears her throat loudly and rachel immediately clicks as to why when she looks at Brittany to see that the girl really didnt know what she was saying. So she back tracks.
"Yeh like I said, I have drank lots of tequila but would love to see Brittany. Plus I know how happy it would make you" She says looking in my direction. "Call it a welcome to the apartment, new roommate, present."
I think it might be the alcohol messing with my head but I can't help myself and pull Rachel into the biggest hug i've ever given her, not that I make a habbit out of hugging the dwarf, I wouldn't want to crush her little body. Quinn would kill me! I choke out a "Thank you" before pulling back. I stand up, take the laptop in my hand and instruct Brittany to say goodnight to Quinn and Rachel so we can have some privacy. As I start walking away I realise I haven't actually seen the entire apartment so don't know where my room is.
"Yo Berry, care to direct me to my boudoir?" She just yells from the couch that its the second door on my right.
"Santana are we role playing? you look like a sexy taco" I totally forgot I was still wearing this shit, but if my girl likes it then I guess it stays on, until she says otherwise.
I hear Quinn and Rachel laughing because they clearly heard brittany's taco remark, so I slam my door behind me and give us all some privacy.
"San? Before we get to the good stuff can I ask you something?" she almost looks shy right now.
"Baby you can ask me anything you want." I look into her eyes through the screen, its nowhere near as good as the real thing but its the best i'm going to get ... until friday that is.
"Will you try and be extra nice to Q and R when the three of you are together, It would make me so happy if they started dating, then we could double date."
"Ok sweetie I promise I will be so nice to our future sapphic sisters they'll think i've had a personality transplant."
"YEY! but san, please don't get a personality transplant, I love your personality ... You wanna know what else I love?" she gives me her most sultry smile and I just know tonight is going to be a good night.
If getting Berry and Q together will make my Britts happy, then you can bet your bottom dollar aunty Tan will make it happen.
Thats not important right now though ... i'm about to get my Brittany on!
A/N OK this is offically my longest chapter so far and I didn't realise how fun it was to write for brittany and Santana. I should be posting my next chapter tomorrow so stay tuned because its going to be about Rachel and Quinn after Santana left them alone, with the tequila while she skypes Brittany . Please review if you can, it truly does make me happy to read them : )