The Fractured Fairytale
Word Count: 1,420
Once Upon a Time, there was a narcissist prince. He was very full of himself, and didn't care very much about what happened outside his castle. The whole kingdom had affectionately nicknamed him 'Naru'.
But it was all about to change, because he needed to pick a princess to marry, if he was ever going to live again.
...
Naru suddenly stood up straighter from looking out of his window in his room in the tallest tower, from hearing the Narrator say that last line. "What do you mean, 'if he ever wanted to live again'? I'm living now, and I don't see how a girl is going to make me live any better."
...
…Either you're naïve, or just stupid, but it is not my job to decide which.
Anyway, the King was growing old, and the time for his son to step up was a crucial time. But his son obviously didn't care very much, so they were relying on a princess to practically take care of the throne by tugging the strings on the prince's back.
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"Excuse me?" Naru demanded, cutting off the Narrator again. "What do you mean? I'm perfectly capable of taking care of this throne without the help of an obnoxious brunette."
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…But if the prince chose not to marry, the kingdom would have to execute him. Taking away his head, because it was the very thing that kept him from getting married.
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Naru's mouth had fallen open. "No one told me about that."
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So thank me, because everyone else apparently wanted to keep you in the dark for some 'reason'.
Now, in the forest was a young maiden—
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"Hey, wait!" Naru shouted up at the sky. "I'm not done with my scene yet!'
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I'm changing the view.
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"No! Don't cut me of—"
A young maiden name Mai strolled around the forest, her home not far from her, which was also, appropriately, in the forest. She was gathering berries for her mother and father. Her mother would use them as healing medicine; her father would just eat them.
...
But unknown to the young maiden, was that she was actually a stolen princess.
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Mai stood up from her picking-berries-stoop. "That really gave away the plot."
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Well, you're not supposed to be listening to me.
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"I can't help it. You're so loud."
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*SIGH*
Moving on. Back at the little cottage that the young maiden /stolen princess Mai called home, her mother rushed out to help her carry the berries inside…
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"Shoo! Shoo!" Doctor Ayako said, waving her hands around to get the birds away from her daughter. They had this extremely weird attraction to her…
Doctor Ayako picked up the other basket that Mai had had been carrying in the crook of her elbow.
"I wish you wouldn't shoo them off, mother, they are such sweet beings," Mai said dreamily, watching the birds fly off.
"They can carry diseases. That's that."
Mai sighed. Her mother was quite worried about all that, which happened to make her a very good doctor. If people could find her in the middle of the woods before they died.
Her father was sitting at the table inside, along with a guest. Ah, it appeared that Father Pink had decided to visit them.
"Good morning, Mai," Father John Pink said. "It is good to see you this bright morning." Despite his name, his robes were black.
Her father, who was jokingly nicknamed 'Monk', just because it seemed to irk Father Pink. He had long dirty blonde hair and was carving away at a block of wood, making small miniature carvings of animals.
Doctor Ayako walked away with the baskets of berries, planning to wash away any thing that might resemble a germ.
...
Mai lived a very peaceful life in the cottage, but all that was going to change with the next words…
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"What was that?" Mai said.
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No, not those words…
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"Mai, did you hear that the prince was looking for suitors?" Her father asked.
"Yes, but I'm not a princess," Mai said, lying about the princess thing, since she figured she shouldn't know yet.
Everyone went very silent. Doctor Ayako appeared in the doorway.
"Mai, there is something that we've been meaning to tell you for a long time…you are a princess, you were placed here to keep you safe from the Evil Overlord."
"Oh, really," Mai said, playing with one of the animal carvings that her father had already completed.
"What do you mean? Aren't you surprised?" Father Pink asked.
"Well, I've had a slight inkling for the past fifteen minutes…" she said.
...
It was true. Young princess Mai had been hidden away in the forest to keep herself from the prophecy that said the Evil Overlord would come after her in fifteen years. She was now sixteen, so it was assumed that the danger had passed.
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"Thank you for explaining it," Monk mumbled.
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You're welcome.
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"But," Mai said, flustered, "However will I meet the dashing prince?"
"You need to get to the ball tonight; it is your only hope."
Mai looked down at her slightly ragged white dress. "I'll try."
Naru was still at his position by the window, contemplating how terrible life would be for people if he wasn't here.
The door opened behind him, and then his sister came in, who went by the name Masako. She was wearing a purple kimono, and looked really out of place.
"Brother," Masako said, "Are you ready to attend the ball tonight?"
Naru sighed. "I don't know. I don't think she'll be at the ball. I can feel her, my other half, but I don't know where she is or where to look."
...
In fact, he could see the forest that she lived in from his window.
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Naru ignored the Narrator this time. "But it is no use. If I lose my head tomorrow, sister, would you be able to move on?"
"Probably."
And somewhere, far, far away…
...
"This plan will work," Evil Overlord Yasu said. "See, if you just wait a year, people lose all suspicion. Fools." He said this to his Evil Henchman, who had a hood over his face, but this only meant that you should remember this guy later on.
"What was the plan again?" The Henchman asked.
Yasu sighed, tugging at the eye patch that was given to him, because someone thought it would make him look more evil. "To capture Mai! Because she belongs to me, not to the Narcissist fool!"
"Oh, yeah," the Henchman said.
"Fool!"
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And as the plan unfolded to claim Mai for his own—
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"Shut up, you fool! You'll give the plan away!" Yasu shouted out of his window.
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Hey, I'm just doing my job—
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"Then do it elsewhere, fool!"
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"What's wrong?" Naru said to the voice in the sky. Masako was at his elbow.
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Nothing is wrong. Just some co-stars are harder to work with.
As I was saying—
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"No! Quiet, fool!" Yasu kept shouting, waving his arms around. "No, no, no!"
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"Can't you just knock him out of his tower, Oh Mighty God?" Asked Monk, still chipping away at the wood in his hand.
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No, I cannot. And I'm not God—
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"Can you just say 'die', and he'll die?" Mai asked casually.
There was silence as the thoughts set in.
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"No, fool, don't do that!" Yasu said, "You'll ruin the plot if you kill me!" He pushed his Henchman in front of him. "Kill this fool!"
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"Who are you?" Naru snapped at the Henchman. "You're probably the cause behind this, you Evil Mastermind!"
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"Excuse me?" Yasu said. "I'm the Evil Overlord and the Evil Mastermind."
There was an evil chuckle from the Henchman. "Only you could have found me out, brother."
The Henchman threw his hood off to show off the likeness of Naru. His smile was just as cocky.
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"No! It can't be!" Naru said, "You died!"
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"It was all a lie, my dear brother. A lie that you were stupid enough to fall for."
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"Nooooooooooooooooooo!"
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Eugene let out another evil laugh that left Yasu cowering in the corner.
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All right, that's IT. If YOU GUYS want to tell the story on your own, be my GUEST. I QUIT.
...
And thus the Narrator left. Naru was beheaded, Mai was left in the forest to become an old maid, Evil Overlord Yasu and Evil Mastermind Gene never got anywhere, because they didn't know where Mai lived.
All because Lin the Narrator left (being neglected like he always was) and the characters didn't know what the other characters were doing anymore.
The End.