A/N: Hope you like it, and, as always, feel free to leave feedback, questions, comments, concerns, or ideas in a review or drop me a PM! Thanks for reading!
Charlie came back to the flat a half hour later, dragging three biohazard spill kits with her. She cautiously tip-toed into the flat and was relieved to find Sherlock sitting moodily on the couch.
"Got the kits." She held up her bags, her tone careful to skirt around Sherlock's obviously compromised state. He grunted in reply, perched on the couch and staring at nothing.
"Where's John gone off to?" She asked, carefully disposing of the acid and baking soda. Sherlock grumbled and shifted on the couch. "Where?" Charlie repeated.
"He went to the pub with Lestrade." Charlie frowned and pulled her iphone from her back pocket. She quickly tapped out a text to John.
Did you two fight while I was gone? –CW
Can I even sign it CW anymore? –CW
She finished cleaning up the mess quickly. Her phone buzzed as she was drying off her hands.
Of course we fought. I don't know, CW, CC, I don't even know anymore Charlie. –JW
May I ask what about? Or is this something we ought to discuss once you're home? –C
I don't think I'll be able to talk about it until I've had a few more drinks. –JW
Give Greg my love then. –C
He's poking fun now. Says you've got me whipped. –JW
If he only knew who was sulking on our sofa. –C
Sulking? –JW
Well what did you expect? –C
I guess it isn't that surprising after all. When I get home we need to discuss what we're going to do about getting the word out about him. –JW
The Yarders will be such a pain. Oh and your parents. –C
Don't even mention my parents, good lord that's going to be painful. –JW
We'll talk when you get home. Don't stay out too late. Don't know how long I can trust myself to not deck Sherlock for pissing you off. –C
Funny. –JW
I'm serious. –C
Course you are love. –JW
Charlie sighed in exasperation, shoving her phone into her back pocket and sitting heavily on the couch next to Sherlock.
"Look," She began. The detective cut her off.
"We need to discuss the relationship between myself and John. I am well aware."
"We'll get to that. Right now I think our more pressing issue is getting you out of this flat and let loose on London's criminal system again. You burnt a hole through the kitchen table this morning and destroyed a patch of the floor. We can't have you cooped up in this flat for much longer. Now, how're we breaking it to the world?" Charlie asked, her voice slightly mocking on the last question.
"What do you mean, how? I show up at the Yard, I work cases again. Nothing complicated about it."
"Sherlock I know you're not stupid okay? Everyone has thought you dead for three years. We have to handle this delicately." Charlie took his hands in hers. He flinched at the contact but didn't pull away, knowing that he had to get along with her for John's sake. When did I start putting John before myself? He wondered, when you set up your fake suicide genius, another part of his mind chided him. He pushed the thoughts and voices away, turning to Charlie.
"Fine. We have Lestrade over, let John break it to him gently before he sees me, and then we will decide how to inform the rest of the Yard. Satisfied?" Sherlock held Charlie still with a piercing gaze.
"Okay, that'll work. He can come over tonight." She let go of Sherlock and stood up, picking her phone off the kitchen counter and texting John.
Invite Greg over for dinner. Sherlock's decided we're telling him tonight. –C
Fantastic. –JW
John I can't tell if that's sarcasm or not. –C
Sarcasm. I'll ask him over okay? –JW
Alright, can you stop by the store on your way home? We don't really have anything for dinner. –C
Couldn't you go? I hate going to the store. –JW
Fine. But I'm not taking Sherlock with me. There won't be anyone here to make sure he doesn't attempt to blow up the sitting room. –C
Just wait until I'm home alright? –JW
Good, you two can sort out whatever you were fighting about while I'm out. –C
Before you protest I'm letting you know it's non-negotiable. –C
Fine. –JW
"Greg's coming over tonight then Sherlock. I'll go out and get some stuff for dinner once John gets home." Charlie told him from the kitchen. A short grunt was the only reply. She peeked back out into the living room. Sherlock was lying on the couch applying a nicotine patch to his arm.
"I don't mind if you just have a cigarette." Charlie told him, pulling a pack of menthol Camels from her purse and tossing them to him. He caught them and sat up, staring at her with a peculiar look on his face.
"You really don't mind?"
"Not at all. I've had to quit cause I'm pregnant, I don't mind if anyone else smokes. I miss the smell." She told him, grinning slightly. Sherlock shot her another quick glance before pulling out a cigarette and going in search of a lighter. He ended up using his Bunsen burner to light it, not wanting to have to ask Charlie for a light as well.
They sat in silence for about a few hours, Charlie curled up in John's chair with a book, Sherlock sitting on the couch and smoking absent-mindedly. All the windows were open and Sherlock was trying to blow the smoke in rings out into the cold London air. When John finally came back to the flat, he found Charlie lying on the floor in the living room with her feet propped up on the couch, watching some American drama on the television while Sherlock blew smoke rings around the flat. The whole place smelled of cigarette smoke and menthol with an undertone of acid from that morning.
"Glad to see you two are enjoying yourselves killing your lungs and possibly damaging my unborn child." John greeted them coldly. Charlie sat up a bit, glancing over at John.
"Oh good you're home." Charlie smiled at him and sat up further, she took a moment to stand up, slightly unbalanced due to her pregnancy.
"So have you and Sherlock been enjoying yourselves then?" John spat, anger spiking his tone.
"I haven't smoked at all since I found out I was pregnant alright? Sherlock was putting on one of those damn nicotine patches so I just gave him my pack of menthols okay?" Charlie replied, keeping her tone level.
"Oh yeah that's just perfect Charlie. He is not supposed to smoke! And you should know better. You knew to quit when you found out you were pregnant; you are well aware that second-hand smoke is just as bad, if not worse than smoking one yourself!" John continued, his voice rising to a shout. Sherlock finished his cigarette lazily, picking up the pack for another. He was slightly surprised to find it empty. He stood up, standing between Charlie and John. He faced John, looking down at the doctor with a somewhat angry glint in his eye. If John hadn't known better, he would have sworn that Sherlock was trying to protect Charlie. He shook his head, that couldn't be true. Could they have possibly formed a somewhat friendly bond while he was gone? Watching crap telly and smoking?
"John I apologize for smoking in the flat, however, you went down to the bar with Lestrade, I think I am entitled to a smoke don't you?" Sherlock asked him, a hint of anger creeping into his voice. John flinched slightly, knowing that Sherlock was still upset about their fight earlier, hell, he was still upset about that. Charlie edged out from behind Sherlock.
"Well you two can finish what you started this morning; I'm going to just run down to the store and get some stuff for dinner." She smiled nervously and grabbed her jacket and her purse, pulling on her shoes and slipping her phone into her pocket.
The door closed quietly and Sherlock and John stood in the middle of the room, glaring at each other with the remains of cigarette smoke hanging around them.
"About this morning," Sherlock began, hoping John would pick up and finish the sentence.
"I'm sorry about that Sherlock. I just don't really know what's going on right now, or what's going to happen from here. I don't know if Charlie and I are getting divorced, I don't know what's going to happen between us, I don't know anything." John apologized, his anger still tinting his tone, but definitely receding. Sherlock gave him a small smile and stepped towards him. He held John's face gently in his hands and leaned down, pressing his lips carefully to the doctor's. John was warm, soft, and tasted of beer. Sherlock chuckled in spite of himself as he pulled away, leaving a slightly bewildered doctor standing in front of him.
"Well I would hope that you can quickly come to a conclusion about what's going on between us because even I am getting a bit confused at this point John." Sherlock smirked and made to step around John into the kitchen, no doubt to try the morning's experiment again. John reached out and took hold of Sherlock's sleeve, pulling the detective to him. He pulled the taller man down to him, their lips clashing together with a desperate hunger. Sherlock tasted of Charlie's menthol cigarettes, and John decided that if the man was going to smoke, he couldn't smoke those anymore. The last thing he wanted was to taste his ex-wife when kissing his boyfriend. John made himself blush thinking about it, thinking that Charlie really would be his ex-wife and that perhaps Sherlock could actually become his boyfriend. They had certainly gotten off to a nice start. Sherlock moaned involuntarily as John sucked on his bottom lip and John smiled in spite of himself. He backed Sherlock against the nearest wall, letting go of his perfect mouth to lay kisses carefully along his neck, working his way slowly to his collarbone.
"John." Sherlock gasped out, his breath torn from him as John worked on creating a mark at the base of Sherlock's perfect neck.
"Hm?" John asked, moving up to Sherlock's lips again.
"It's about time you gave in." Sherlock teased, his face and eyes alight. John frowned and caught his teasing lips.
Charlie came back to the flat a half hour later to a concerned Mrs. Hudson waiting for her.
"Mrs. Hudson?" Charlie began. The woman grabbed her arm and pulled her into her flat.
"Dear, I think there's someone upstairs with John." She told her, concern etched into her kind face. Charlie stood for a moment, confused. When it dawned on her, she smiled politely and thanked Mrs. Hudson, picking up her grocery bags and heading upstairs. She opened the door carefully, peeking inside before walking in. The flat was conspicuously empty. She frowned and dragged her bags to the kitchen. She was almost finished unloading the groceries when she heard it. A loud moan drifting down the stairs. She stepped out into the stairway and climbed to her room curiously. She knocked loudly on the door. A moment later John appeared, his hair sticking up wildly and his lips swollen and red. His jumper was twisted and a large purple mark adorned his exposed neck.
"So, my bed seemed like your best option?" She asked calmly, working to keep her face free of emotion.
"We, we didn't-"
"Yeah save it John. Mrs. Hudson heard something. She practically pounced on me the minute I walked in. Told me she thought someone was in the flat with you. Looked pretty shocked too." Charlie informed him, reaching out and straightening his jumper.
"Yeah, sorry about that." John couldn't meet her eyes, feeling ashamed of himself, after all they were still married and he wasn't even sure if they were going to divorce.
"Quit worrying about me will you?" She asked him, seeming to read his mind. John stared at her for a moment, shocked.
"How did you? What-?" He stammered.
"Just don't okay? Now you two better straighten up, Greg should be over in an hour, he texted while I was out and we decided that an early dinner would be best." John's eyebrows rose at Charlie's command to 'straighten up'.
"Now when you say 'straighten up' you do just mean get dressed for dinner right?" John asked, trying to keep the juvenile smile from his face. Charlie let out a short, light laugh.
"Yeah John, I don't mean that you have to 'suppress the gay' naturally. Although I think we should only spring one massive surprise on Greg at a time don't you think?" She pulled him into a quick hug.
"Nice going by the way." She winked as she let go and hurried down the stairs. John shook his head and wandered back into the bedroom. Sherlock was spread out across the bed, lying about lazily.
"Did you-?"
"I heard it all of course. And she's right; you've landed quite a boyfriend John." Sherlock smirked at him, sitting up slowly and buttoning his shirt. The purple and red marks along his collarbone disappeared beneath the white fabric.
"Boy-boyfriend?" John asked, his face paling.
"Naturally. That's where this is going isn't it? Might as well go there now, there's no sense in waiting."
"I just wasn't sure- I mean, Charlie and I aren't divorced yet, and I didn't know if you-" Sherlock cut him off.
"John, never doubt me again. Please." Sherlock stood up and crossed the room to hold John's hands in his. "Please." John looked up into those cold blue and grey eyes. He nodded.
"Never again." He leaned up as Sherlock leaned down and they shared a short and careful, but none the less, loving kiss. John broke away with a grin.
"What?" Sherlock asked.
"You just begged." John's smile grew wider as he talked. "You begged. Twice."
"Well, the situation demanded it." Sherlock tried to cover. John laughed and took his hand.
"Let's go get tidied up shall we?" John stepped out onto the landing, checking to be sure Mrs. Hudson wasn't around. When he saw it was clear he and Sherlock tiptoed down the stairs to their flat. They stopped short a few stairs up as a familiar voice drifted to meet them.
"I assure you my dear, I am an old friend of John's. The gun is not necessary."
"Mycroft." Sherlock whispered, his voice filled with suppressed anger.
"Gun? Good lord Charlie must've grabbed my gun when he showed up out of nowhere."
"Serves the fat twat right." Sherlock spat.
"Come on Sherlock, let's go stop my wife from shooting the British government."