"And they say that a hero can save us/I'm not gonna stand here and wait/I'll hold onto the wings of the eagles/Watch as we all fly away"

–Nickelback – "Hero"

…

"Move!" Kenny screamed as he shoved Stan and Kyle to one side and Clyde, Token, and Timmy dodge to the other side. The blinding green ray flew past them, instead hitting a passing adult who immediately turned towards The Coon and Professor Chaos to bow formally like the others.

"Holy shit," Kyle sighed out, "that was close."

Stan nodded. "It was." He looked over at Kenny as the blonde began climbing a locked off metal ladder leading to the roof of the mom n' pop restaurant they were hiding behind. "What're you doing Kenny?"

"Mysterion," he said evenly and then looked back at where Stan and Kyle were still standing. "Kyle, Stan, you need to change into Human Kite and Tool Shed now!" He pointed over at Clyde, Token, and Timmy. "Tell them to change also."

"Wait, Ken–Mysterion, why?" Kyle asked with concern. "This couldn't get too bad, could it?"

Mysterion sent a glare at his redheaded friend. "Just do it! Trust me on this, both of you! I need you to meet me on the roof when you've changed into Human Kite. Tool Shed, you, Iron Maiden, and Tupperware attack from the ground. Mosquito can attack from the air." He turned and continued climbing up the ladder.

"Tool Shed?" Kyle raised an eyebrow.

"Yes?" Tool Shed's voice echoed softly next to Kyle's ear, causing the redhead's face to turn the color of his hair.

Kyle looked back at his boyfriend and sighed deeply. "That was a quick transformation…"

"Of course. It needs to be." Tool Shed released Kyle. "Hurry and change into Human Kite, Mysterion needs our help." He turned and darted across the opening of the alley, barely avoiding getting hit by another blast of green.

Kyle sighed and stripped his jacket and t-shirt off, not wanting to have to explain to his mother why yet another jacket and shirt combination had been torn to shreds in the back - he had to make up an excuse for the last time. Just before he slipped his eyes closed to allow the kite to come from his back, he pulled his hair back into a tight bun just in case the wind decided to play against him. Once the jet black kite with bone white poles came from his back and he was levitating in the air, Human Kite summoned a soft wind to help him fly up to the roof of the building. He landed next to Mysterion near the edge of the roof and glanced down at where The Coon and Professor Chaos were still standing.

"What's your plan?" Human Kite murmured to his friend.

"Full assault once everyone's in place," Mysterion replied. He looked over in time to see Mosquito quietly land on the roof on other side of the alley. "That's it," he ran off the edge of the building with his fist engulfed in flames, aiming for The Coon's head as he fell, "now!"

Hearing the voice above his head, The Coon looked up and dodged backwards just in time for the flaming fist to graze right past him and into the pavement instead. Professor Chaos was thrown back a bit by the small shockwave the impact let off, but he caught himself and stumbled for his balance for only a few moments.

Human Kite ran for the edge of the building and then stopped as the same painful sensation from before ran through his arms and legs. "What the hell?" He let out a short scream as the bones of his arms and legs forced him to completely straighten out and rose from beneath his skin to expand the kite on his back - which unfortunately tore apart his pants and boxers. "Fucking weak! I'm nak–huh?" A pair of jeans appeared around his waist and legs as a tight grey spandex long-sleeved shirt appeared around his torso - both were so tight they left little to the imagination. "This raises more questions," he muttered.

"Kite," Mosquito called from his new position in the air, "come on!"

"Uh…yeah!" A gust of wind blew Human Kite into the air towards where Professor Chaos was standing.

The blonde villain had swapped out the ray gun for a silver handgun, and seeing this, Human Kite swooped in closer to attack with Mosquito. But when Professor Chaos pulled the trigger, instead of a bullet exploding from the barrel of the gun, a ball of electricity flew towards Human Kite. He pointed the gun at Mosquito and pulled the trigger again.

The electrical ball moved towards both flying heroes faster than they could dodge it; just as they both registered what it was, it collided which them and sent them crashing to the pavement. Professor Chaos stepped towards Human Kite and Mosquito with every intention of killing them with one more blast each.

"Kite!" Tool Shed screamed. He held out one arm towards the hardware store and summoned an electric nail gun into his hand. The moment it touched his palm, he closed his fingers around it and pointed it at Professor Chaos. He held the trigger down and willed nail after nail to shoot from the power tool at Professor Chaos, who dropped his weapon as he quickly darted out of the way of each nail*.

Nail gun still in hand, Tool Shed ran over to Human Kite and dropped to one knee next to him. "Are you alright?"

The kite shrunk back to its normal size against Human Kite's back as he sat up. He nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine." He looked over at Mosquito. "You okay dude?"

Mosquito groaned and slowly sat up rubbing his head. "That little shit's gonna pay for this!" He moved into a crouch and launched himself into the air towards Professor Chaos, where Iron Maiden was already attacking the blonde with metal spikes that shot from his hollow eyes.

"Yeah, he's fine," Tool Shed commented. He helped Human Kite to his feet in time for Mysterion to be thrown into them, sending them tumbling back to the ground.

"Dammit," Mysterion cursed as he leapt back to his feet. He sent a glare and another fireball at The Coon in time to meet with what looked like green glowing leftover Tupperware chucked at him.

The two projectiles collided and caused the leftover to explode into The Coon's face, sending him flying back, (it unfortunately also left a rotten smell in the air that usually accompanied week old tuna fish). The half-raccoon villain coughed and brushed off ashes and rotted food with a loud curse. "This fucking smells!" The brunette yelled. "Godammit!"

"Fine," Human Kite stood with Tool Shed and through a blast of air at The Coon, "I'll get rid of the stench." The Coon flew back into a building and sunk to his knees in severe pain - at least the smell was gone.

"Fuck," he groaned. Slowly he stood with help from the brick wall he'd been slammed up against. He sent a glare over at the redhead who attacked him. "Asshole!"

Human Kite crossed his arms over his chest. "What'd you expect?"

Scowling, The Coon pointed one clawed finger up in the air. "Well guess what dick hole…?" He smirked as a portal of swirling crimson red and black opened in the sky. It caught the attention of everyone around; Professor Chaos, Mosquito, Tupperware, and Iron Maiden quit fighting to look at it. "You're about to re-meet something you all met a long time ago."

Professor Chaos' eyes widened significantly. He ran forward and tackled The Coon to ground, closing portal before anything could come out. "You can't do that! It doesn't matter what'll come on, it'll kill everything in sight!"

"Then what are we gonna do about those assholes?"

The blonde sighed and pulled another silver handgun from a deep pocket in his cape. He pointed it at each of the heroes and pulled the trigger. Electric balls hit each one of them, knocking all but Tool Shed to the ground; actually he had caught the electric ball. Professor Chaos' eyes narrowed at the sight of the black-haired teen with sparking orange eyes still standing and holding the ball of pure electricity. Why was he still standing? Or really, how? He should've been flat on his back like the others. Besides that, how'd he catch it?

Tool Shed smirked and looked at the electric ball in his hand as it spun gracefully. It looks like something from an anime… Cool. He glanced back over at where The Coon and Professor Chaos were standing with his smirk still in place and smoothly drew his arm back and threw the electric ball back at them.

"Shit!" The Coon hooked his claws into Professor Chaos' cape and pulled him back so that they could avoid the ball. He sighed in relief when the blonde's forehead was only grazed, barely even bleeding. He knew that there would be no one he could succeed as a villain without him; Professor Chaos was the person who built all of their weapons and technology after all.

"Nice dodge," Tool Shed chuckled, "fat ass."

The Coon's teeth ground together, he forced Professor Chaos to step in front of him, not caring that blood was dripping down into the blonde's right eye. "Take care of that son-of-a-bitch!"

Professor Chaos nodded and, regardless of the fact that his right eye was blinded by blood and that he was in pain, pulled a jet black handgun from another pocket in his cape. This time when he pulled the trigger though, a water ball launched at Tool Shed, who laughed until it hit him. It had the same effect of someone getting electrocuted; he screamed and then collapsed to the ground with the others.

Professor Chaos slid the gun back into his cape and wiped the blood from his eye. That cut was really starting to cause him a lot of pain. When The Coon looked at him funny, Professor Chaos said, "It was just a guess. But I figured it'd have the same effect of dropping a hairdryer in a bathtub."

The Coon chuckled and licked some of the blood from Professor Chaos' cheek. "Good job bitch, you'll get a reward when we get back." He stalked over to the group of unconscious superheroes. "Now what to do with all of you…?"

Slowly Human Kite opened his eyes after finally somewhat recovering from the electric shock from a few minutes before. The first thing he saw was Tool Shed's drenched, unconscious face next to his. His eyes widened. "Tool Shed?" He muttered as his arm moved so that his hand could cup his boyfriend's face, but before he could reach Tool Shed's face, The Coon grabbed onto his neck and lifted Human Kite up to be just in front of his face.

The Coon smirked. "Well well, I guess you're not as weak as you look, Human Kike."

Human Kite ground his teeth together as his vision literally turned red. "Fuck you!" Red lasers shot from his eyes, something The Coon was barely able to avoid, it burned the flesh on his cheek severely.

The brunette dropped Human Kite to the ground as his hand flew to his burned, bleeding cheek. "What the fuck was that?" He took his hand away from his cheek to look at the blood his palm had captured. "Godammit!"

"Wait!" Professor Chaos grabbed The Coon's shoulder to stop him from grabbing Human Kite again when he noticed the redhead's eyes were wide and still glowing deep red. He could fire off another laser at any moment. "We should retreat for now."

"Why?" The Coon demanded. "We've got them where we want them!"

Professor Chaos shook his head. "Trust me, save the end for another day."

The Coon ground his teeth together since he was annoyed with retreating, but just nodded and backed off a few steps with Professor Chaos.

Human Kite's eyelids became heavy and he blinked slowly, enough time for the two villains to disappear. Noticing they were gone, he allowed the kite to sink back into his back and he collapsed back expecting to hit the ground. Instead, he fell back into one of Mysterion's arms. He looked groggily up at the tall blonde. "M-Mysterion?" When did he become conscious again?

Mysterion hadn't heard his friend's words, he was staring over at where Professor Chaos had been standing just a moment ago. He'd woken up in time to see his ex and The Coon disappeared in a flash of light from a small flash bomb Professor Chaos had produced from a pocket in his cape. A single tear ran down Mysterion's face. He had been hoping to defeat The Coon and take back Professor Chaos today, even if it meant by force. Well, there was always next time he supposed.