Super-happy-nudist-supernatural-finn-adventure time-fun time!
I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!
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ANNOUNCEMENT!
I'M GETTING A BOOK PUBLISHED!
SUMMARY:
On the 13th day of the 13th month of the 13th year...magic will return to the world...and the streets will run red with the blood of the (semi)innocent...unless the world is saved by the most unlikely of hero's...baking cupcakes?!
The title is '13/13/13' and it'll be coming to a bookstore or E-Book site near you! Xilbris is the publisher, also available at Amazon, Inkitt and BarnesandNoble.
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"Well...don't we look cozy?" Finn shivered as he woke up from his sleep, he looked up and saw the thing that murdered his brother and stole his dignity hanging over the bed he was lying in.
Finn's first instinct was to leap up and punch him...but not only was he too cold to act on this...but also...SOMETHING was on top of him weighing him down. He looks to see a naked blue woman on top of him...and just like that...he REMEMBERS...
...
Finn sighed, it had been a couple weeks since the ' nudist slumber party incident'(not surprising everyone remembers the pictures of PB being naked more then the near destruction of Candy Kingdom) had happened...and he'd just been aimlessly wandering the land naked. At first he'd tried to dress himself but it seemed like every time someone came up to talk with him any clothes he wore just disintegrated...
Usually at the worst possible time-
Wildberry Princess giggled, "Oh my, Finn! So bold!" She teased a blushing Finn...
In any case it was too costly and time consuming to find/make/buy clothes if they were just going to be destroyed at random intervals...so he just went naked and avoided cities.
For the thousandth time he looked at the map supposedly leading to his 'parents'. He again wondered if he should follow it...he knew his 'old', impulsive self would just jump to it without thinking...but the whole ordeal had taught him caution.
How did he know this wasn't a trap? What if it was a trick? But on the other hand...if it WAS his parents...could he afford NOT to find them?
He looked up and saw the ice kingdom...come to think of it...no one had heard anything from Ice king for weeks...he must be up to something BIG! He then jumps and assumes sliding position-
Only to realize that although a little wiser then he once was...he was still recklessly impulsive-
GAH!
-Like sliding down an icy hill naked. Naturally, by the time Finn reached the bottom, he was freezing! "Well, well what do we have here!?"
Finn turns...and is stunned! Standing before him is a naked ice king...GIRL edition!
Finn felt flustered, but quickly tried to steel his resolve, "Uh...ICE KING! I KNOW YOU'VE BEEN UP TO SOME BAD BIZ! SO FESS UP! I-
ZAP!
Finn's eye's widen, the ice 'king' had just frozen his wiener.
The blue girl chuckles, "First of all it's ice QUEEN. Second, about time a real MAN- smirks at Finn's exposed loin's much to his embarrassment -showed up, place was starting to become a real MELON-party."
Suddenly she grabs his 'icicle' and drags him away to her cave! "OW!" Cried out Finn as he tried to resist only for his ding-dong to crack slightly.
"Don't struggle, your frozen dingus will snap like a twig! Besides, if your a good boy I'll help you...'warm up'." She says evilly...
Finn tried to use his new heat powers...but her power of ice was too great and easily negated it...
In too much pain, too frozen, and desperate to keep his loins from shattering an innocent Finn was forced to comply...after all, he reasons...how bad could 'getting warm' be?
...
"So How was Tier 15?" Teased Slenderman.
Finn sighed, "Jake was right...I was WAY too young for what just happened." He groaned as the full reality of the situation hit him.
"Did I...did I seriously just lose my virginity to Ice King- "Ice QUEEN my boy, big difference." Interrupted the eldritch abomination
"...still weird..." Said Finn finally.
"That it is, that it is." Agreed Slenderman.
...there was a long awkward pause... "Look, we need to move the plot along, so to answer your question's; YES, it's a trap. But your parents ARE where the map indicated...there 'bait'."
Finn sighed, "For the record if I weren't so exhausted and confused/traumatized right now...I'd be slugging you." Stated Finn flatly.
"oh, don't be that way. I'm here to tell you how to get to them...well, I'll tell you how to get to your dad first. I'll put up an impassible hurricane around your mom until then." He snaps his finger to make it so.
"What? Why!?" Demanded Finn.
But Slenderman ignores him and continues and explains about the Enciridion and how it could be used along with the princesses royal gems to open a portal that would allow him to continue in the direction the map pointed out.
Finn growls, "Fine man I'll play your messed up game. I'll save my parents AND find a way to whoop your butt!"
Slenderman chuckled, "Good luck with that."
And then he leaves...and Finn realizes he still has a sleeping, naked genderbent ice king on top of him that'll probably freeze his dong again if he tries to escape again!
"Oh, balls..."
...
Key-per exited his lair to greet the newest challenger, "Greetings, hero's! I am- His head took 5 seconds to hit the ground... Slenderman snaps his fingers and the key on his head disintegrates...and the gate warps into a dark, twisted version of itself...which then opened for him.
"Enough of this 'season 1' nonsense...what say we craft a test worthy of TRUE hero!" Laughed Slenderman as he walked inside...the screams were quick to follow...
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TO BE CONTINUED?
AN: I know it says "in-progress" but really I just don't like boxing myself into a corner. For now this is more of a one-shot that I might continue one day...but probably won't.
But, hey. Feel free to use whatever elements you want from this, if you want! Or maybe give me ideas?
Love me, flame me, review me