Rating: T for a choice of spicy words and for murderous thoughts.

Characters: Neji / Tenten / Hiashi

Warnings: See rating.

Genre: Parody / Humor

Dedication: All for I.heart.Hatake.Kakashi, just because she planted in my mind the idea to do this!

A/N: Yes, I know that Konoha don't have post offices. But this was just too good to let up. And don't say it's unreal, because something similar happened to me the other day… T.T It downed…

Also, I suggest going to see I.Heart.Hatake.Kakashi's Oneshot Collection about Neji and Tenten. Chapter 29 has a huge referrence to this! It's definitely worth the read too, since it's an amazing fan fiction!

Take care!

Title: A Man's Best Friend

"Come in."

Hyuuga Neji twisted the doorknob, then stepped inside the spacious room that served as Hiashi's office. Gently shutting the door behind himself, he swiftly made his way to the expensive-looking mahogany desk, then stopped in front of it and gave a low bow.

"Good morning, nephew," Hiashi said rapidly, putting down the few papers he had been looking over. Training his glance on the shinobi in front of him, he took a few seconds to look at the fourteen-year-old proudly before stating his desires.

"I have a few documents that were supposed to come in yesterday through the mail, yet they didn't arrive. Surely, they must be there right now. Would you go pick them up for me, Neji?"

The Chuunin blinked once with disgust before saying, "I've got training to do, uncle. I believe that training is definitely more important than going to pick up a few documents. Why don't you send someone younger?"

Shifting, Hiashi looked back towards the papers on his desks before sighing. "I would, yet the documents are very important and secret. I would only trust a shinobi like you to go pick them up."

"Of course," Neji relented with a nod. "I'll be back in a few minutes."

"Good," Hiashi said, his eyes easing from its tensed look. "But I need them within the hour, understood?"

"Yes, sir."

The young prodigy bowed respectfully once more and turned swiftly on his heels, his Hyuuga robes flowing around him. His face was impassive, careless, and devoid of any emotions as he slowly continued through the compound. Soon outside, he began to walk towards the post office, his mind reeling.

'How dare he send me on such an insignificant task!' he mentally raged, even though his face was as peaceful as ever. 'It's like I'm some weak Genin who doesn't do anything right, and I'm being punished by being Hiashi-sama's errand boy!'

As he was walking, he suddenly heard a soft yapping sound to his left. Turning his eyes lightly, he noticed something trotting along beside him. The soft brown ball huffed curiously as Neji stopped walking, its dark eyes peering up innocently at the prodigy.

'I know her…' the boy stared down at the puppy. 'This is Tenten's dog.'

Along with the realization came a sharp memory of a few weeks ago. Kiba, intent on finding himself a girlfriend, had begun to hit on quite a number of females. Including Konoha's weapon mistress. Yet, through all the compliments and passes he made at her, the girl had only cooed at Akamaru and had exclaimed on how cuddly he looked.

Neji, unsure whether he was more annoyed with Kiba or with the fact that Tenten was pouring her all attention to the white dog, had grumbled that she should get one for herself.

Big mistake.

His sparring partner had then dragged him to every single pet shelter within a day's distance during the week after, eventually coming back to Konoha with the smallest puppy he could imagine existed.

And now, that thing was sitting at his heels, looking at him expectantly.

Neji wasn't the kind of guy who liked "cuddly" or "adorable" things. He also wasn't one to lean down to pet "cuddly" and "adorable" animals. So he did the only thing Hyuuga Neji could do in such situations- he blatantly ignored the dog and started walking once more.

Yet that didn't stop the animal. She trotted happily alongside of him, almost as if he was her master instead of Tenten.

Still ignoring said animal, Neji continued his walk towards the post office. He noticed a few girls shooting sly glances at him before dissolving in a fit of giggles at seeing the tough prodigy being trailed by such a cute little dog.

So Neji retorted to the second thing he did in these kinds of situations; he glared.

Never breaking his stride, he looked down and shot the puppy a death glare, one that so many people broke under. Yet Tenten's animal only barked happily once he did so, which made him cringe slightly.

Eventually, the dog seemed to wane off and went to run through the sand, while Neji continued along the way. Arriving at the post office, he sighed deeply as his hands touched the doorknob. He closed his eyes for a second and thought of only two words, 'Stupid mutt…'.

Yet when he reopened his light purple orbs, the sight in front of his eyes hadn't changed: the puppy was still sitting faithfully in front of the door, wagging her tail gleefully.

Knowing that opening the door and letting the dog in was out of the question, Neji turned around and took a few steps back, immediately being followed by the dog. With his head held high, the powerful shinobi then whirled around and rapidly walked back to the door, but to no avail; the animal followed his every step.

'Damn you,' he silently swore as the puppy cutely ran between his ankles in a tight circle. Shooting a quick glance around and, thankfully, noticing that there wasn't a soul around him, the tall prodigy gazed at the puppy.

"Shoo," he said stoically, not an expression on his face.

The pup sat down on his feet and, huffing, peered up at him with a tilted head.

Wincing lightly as his ego was slowly being shattered by a dog; Neji gritted his teeth proudly and decided to wait. Surely, it would have effects; the dog would eventually tire himself from staring at him.

Of course, since he was a genius, he wasn't wrong. Yet his plan backfired; the dog began to run, lounging the door to the post office, rending it impossible to enter.

'Come on, Hyuuga,' his subconscious snapped at him, 'you're a freaking prodigy, yet you can't even enter a damned post office?'

Since his pride seems to be shattering more every second, Neji roughly glared at the clock that sat atop of the building. He had been standing there, like a moron, for more than thirty minutes.

'Tenten, I hate you…' he instantly thought, then glared at the frolicking animal. 'Correction, I hate your taste in pets.'

Eventually, though, when he realized that he had been gone from the compound forty-five minutes, he knelt down slowly after making damn sure there was no one around. Raising a hand, he gently beckoned the dog over.

Of course, she didn't budge from her spot at the door. Grumbling, the Hyuuga crept away from the door farther down the road, walking for about three minutes before realizing the dog was still stuck to his heels. Sighing dejectedly, he knelt down once more in front of her. She only barked a few times, then began to nuzzle Neji's outstretched hand.

Leaning closer, Neji narrowed his eyes to slits before muttering, "Now, you are going to go back home to your master, and let me be…"

Seeing as though the dog didn't seem to want to answer his command, he finished it with, "… or I'll Kaiten you out of here, I swear."

The puppy leaned over and licked his hand.

At that moment, Neji was ready to put his threat to execution. He got up, placed himself in his Jyuuken state, when a voice drifted to him, calling his name.

Neji actually cringed. Forcing his face to return normal, he turned around to meet his uncle, who was rapidly approaching with a pissed-off look on his face.

"May I ask what you're doing? I've been waiting for these papers for nearly an hour!" Hiashi growled upon arriving. Then, the Byakuugan-user's eyes fell upon the puppy.

For the first time in his life, Neji saw Hiashi with a stunned look on his face.

"Actually," the Patriarch continued slowly, unbelieving what he was seeing. "Nevermind. I'll go get them myself."

"No." Was Neji's firm answer through gritted teeth. "I'll. Get. Them. Myself."

Slowly, the leader of the Hyuuga clan turned around and, after a nod, left the area.

Neji glared down at the gasping puppy once more, with all the hate he could muster in his eyes. Now he didn't feel like Kaiten'ing him away; he simply felt like impaling the poor thing. But, forcing himself to keep his cool, he headed back to the post office.

Crossing his arms upon his arrival, he turned his attention back to the following puppy and pleadingly asked him to leave. Now he wasn't as lucky, though, since some girls had deemed the sight "too cute to resist" and had now formed a little watch just across the street. They all burst into laughter when the pup barked and ran in a circle. Feeling his reputation dying with every passing second, Neji gritted his hands in fists as his eyes fell to his weapon pouch. It suddenly looked very tempting…

Suddenly, though, he heard a giggle closer to him than the rest. Turning around, he turned his glare to a roaring Tenten, who was leaning against a tree and holding her sides with both hands as she laughed.

"This. Is. Not. Funny," he menacingly growled. "How long have you been standing there?"

"Long enough!" the kunoichi laughed merrily, then gently whistled. The puppy tottered over to the girl, who swept her in her arms. She then shot Neji a mischievous look, "I should bring her along for training. She definitely owned you today!"

"Hn," Neji mumbled in annoyance before turning his attention to the door. Placing his hand on the knob, he attempted to twist it, yet it didn't open. Frowning lightly, he rattled it a few times, before his eyes fell on the lone sheet of paper well-taped on the wall besides the door, that clearly read:

Post office: closed for the day.
Sorry for the inconvenience, come back tomorrow.