A/N: I am extremely busy and depressed, which is the main factor in my not posting for several weeks. My personal goal is to try to post two chapters a month if I can find the time. I figure that's a low enough goal for myself that I should be able to do that considering I was generally writing two chapters at a time when I got into a good groove.

Please be aware that this chapter was written over 4 different sittings. I tried my best to make it flow smoothly as if it were written straight through. I tried to make tense corrections and pronoun corrections but who knows whether I did a good job until you've read through it. I'm sorry regardless. Please enjoy - I hope to be more active for you.

Lucas hadn't told anyone exactly what he'd been planning for the Friar Family dinner they hold on Christmas Eve each year. The only thing that anyone knew is that he wanted to go last when the gift exchange was happening – and that whoever had Maya needed to trade with him. Anyone who might have suspected that he was going to propose had done a fantastic job keeping it behind locked lips.

Admittedly, he'd wanted to tell someone. There was the consideration that he should let his father know, but since his relationship with Maya was strong he wanted it to be a surprise for him too. Nobody could know in order for him to have the impact that he desired.

Now that the part was in full swing he realizes that he is nervous. The confidence that he found last week when he purchased the ring dissipated. Perhaps it had something to do with the fact that Maya spent time alone with Conner yesterday. She was distant after the lunch. Lucas told Conner to keep his distance because he knew that he needed that this matter couldn't have outside influence. This was the most his relationship with Maya had ever been tested. It was crucial that they resolve it on their own.

Conner somehow interfered, though, and Lucas was not sure proposing to Maya now was the wisest move for them. His love for her is no different. His commitment to her is no different. Even his opinion of Conner is no different. Worry is simply swelling in his gut harshly.

"How you doin' son?" His father asks when he finds himself shooting back a couple of whiskeys in the kitchen. Apparently Maya had been in the bathroom throwing up for about ten minutes and had asked someone to find Lucas. Feeling terrible about himself and his selfish motivation to propose to her…

…Well, he sort of forgot that she was pregnant and that maybe wasn't at her best. Several people had questioned him if Maya was ill or if she'd been to the doctor yet. Lucas assured each person that she was just fine. Others questioned if something was wrong, then, but promised them – and him self, to some degree – that everything was delightful. Most of his words were intended to remind himself that everything was going to work out in spite of the fact that he didn't wholly believe the words himself.

"I was hoping we could at least make it through the exchange. Which bathroom is she in?" By no means does he intend to sound so angry. Fatherly eyes glare down at him suspiciously. Briefly he lectures Lucas about being a gentleman and getting her home if she's not feeling well. Then he explains that she's in her old bathroom upstairs. Lucas hesitates no longer and jogs his way through the house.

Maya was slumped not next to the toilet but in the shower. The shower was running and she was lying in her underwear with her hands on her stomach. With a frown on her face she moaned in discomfort; "The devilled eggs did not agree with me."

Absently Lucas remarks to her, "The baby is going to be a meat lover."

Maya rolls over and points a finger, "We haven't even talked about the organism inside of me yet. Don't use the 'b' word." Her words don't sound convincing, meaning she's likely struggling to convince herself one way or the other on motherhood. She already declared that she would be willing to be a mother under better circumstances. Lucas and Maya were working hard to make things make sense when they simply do not. A sigh escaped from behind his lips.

It would be easy not to say 'baby' until Maya officially decided to maintain her pregnancy. That was just an issue of respect, which he could handle. The painful part would be accepting that Maya could still choose to terminate. Lucas could do nothing about it since it was not his body.

There was certainly no rush to make it to the exchange at this point. Pretending as everything was normal, as if nothing had changed, was never going to sufficiently resolve the issues. So he slumps down against the wall and shrugs his shoulders once he hits the floor. Even though Maya is avoiding eye contact with him he stares at her attentively. This was never apart of the happily ever after story he'd expected.

"We can go home if you would like and figure all of this out. We're hitting a wall, aren't we?" Lucas offers. Maya smiles faintly. Initially it would look genuine, and anyone else would have believed her amused. Everyone else who saw her would believe she was at ease, but not Lucas. As her boyfriend, hopefully her fiancé, he could see through it. Even at a distance he could see the slightest quiver in her brows, the shadow a wrinkle in her chin. It was the shadow of sorrowful agreement. Both of them were still at a loss.

Maya doesn't wait long to reply, "Let's just go to bed here. I don't have a change of clothes here anyway. Could you just throw those clothes in the wash? I might have thrown up down the front of myself when I came up…" Her voice trails off as his eyes trace the path of her finger. Her clothes and two towels had been thrown into the trash bin. Lucas gets a chuckle out of it, which prompts her to laugh along with him. Tension doesn't melt away like Lucas always believed happened when couples found middle ground, but it did start to chip off.

Feeling better he decides to reply, "I'm sure someone bought you clothes for Christmas, but we can stay here. Anything else you need while I'm downstairs?" The offer is as natural as breathing. Doing things for and with Maya were second nature after all this time. Initially she says she is fine, but then she then asks for some water and a plate of greens. Then she asks for a specific blanket that is kept in the living room. Then and then, and then, and then, she asks for a ton of things and it forces Lucas to make a small written list.

"So laundry, greens, blanket, pitcher of ice water, our gift exchange gifts, your purse, and you decided you do want the ice pack?" Maya is nodding before he finishes the question. For a brief second things feel really good before Lucas leaves the room to fetch all that Maya requires. As he goes he wonders how he'll work a proposal into this new plan. For now, he's not going to do it tonight.

But he will propose soon because there's nobody else he'd rather marry than Maya Hart.

Morning comes and Maya wakes before Lucas. She'd fallen asleep while he was gathering everything she'd asked of him. When he returned he must have moved her into the bed. Today is now Christmas Day, and somehow the holiday spirit was completely absent. Perhaps it is due to the fact that she is pregnant in a failing relationship and a secret that wasn't hers to keep. Maybe it is the job loss, or the fact that she felt so alone in Texas. Maybe it is just because she was having a rough year as a whole, and the holidays weren't special so much as they were just another day.

Regardless of what is making her feel so off she manages to trudge her way to the kitchen. At the table sits Les with his hands folded and a familiar folder in front of him. That secret that has been weighing down on her conscience is now openly in front of her. She fears that he believes today was the day he plans to announce his diagnosis. Maya frowns while crossing her arms in a bit of panic.

Nervously she paces as she stares at the folder, "I think we both know that I know what that is on the table."

Les cracks a smile patiently. How a man with cancer could be patient, she doesn't know, but she mirrors that pace. Silence sits between them for a minute or so before he just laughs, "Well, sweetheart, I think butter has been around for a long while now. If you didn't know what it was then I'd be ashamed for you."

Under any other circumstance Maya may have laughed.

"You said anything to anyone about that folder yet?" Maya demanded, turning her back on him and staring out the window. Lucas and Connor couldn't keep up with it on their own, and with lost profits Les was pulling weight he couldn't support around the ranch. It was obvious that things were slowly falling into disrepair: flaking paint, tall grass, weeds everywhere, and shaggy fur on the animals. Aside from that, there were signs inside the house as well. Les had never wanted a dishwasher but earlier this summer he finally had one installed because it was causing his back too much stress to stand and do the dishes on his own. The clothesline outside had been replaced with a top loading washer and dryer to minimize the movement he needed to do to keep up on his household tasks…

When she glances back at Les he's opened the folder to pull out pages. Her body is on autopilot. She walks over and begins reviewing the pages. As it turns out he has stage four leukemia. As low as it could sink, her heart drops there. In her personal opinion, this was one cancer that was most easily misdiagnosed. It could be missed without even a concern arising about it. To top it off, Les is getting older. Things that may have been symptoms of leukemia in a person Maya's age were very often dismissed as signs of aging in someone at Les' stage of life. Seeing that it is so far advanced already on paper…

"Survival rate is low." He declared very certainly.

Maya is about to bite her words at him when they are both taken off guard by another voice interrupting the conversation. It was clear that at that moment that was no more hiding. For Maya, one problem was about to replace another.

"Are the horses okay?" Lucas questioned us with a hazy look in his eyes. Likely he's woke and did not see Maya in bed. He would have checked the bathroom first before sauntering downstairs to see if she was eating. Even though she wasn't very far along, she guesses he expects her to be hungry all of the time. Maya doesn't think negatively of him for expecting that, of course. Pregnancy demands a lot of the body, even in the first trimester. Still, a part of her can't help but be irritated simply because she is already upset with him and their situation.

"This is a conversation you should have had with Lucas when it first came up." Maya dictates angrily. Disagreements have come and gone between Maya and Les, but never were those arguments over something as monumental as his health. There was hardly anything he'd shared with her at this point in time but Les' intentions were clear. He had plans to speak with Maya before his own son.

Lucas perks up at the mention of his name and shoved his hands in his pants pockets. Having grown up here, kind of, Lucas has clothes lying around all the time. He'd found pajamas that still fit him somewhere in the house last night. They were quite snug, which Maya found a little attractive, but he barely seemed to notice.

Maya turned away from both men and decided to rummage the refrigerator. As she put her distance between them she counted her breaths to distract from the explosive conversation.

"What should we be talking about?" The inquiry was soft and clueless. Les was shuffling papers but Maya didn't know if it was in effort to hide them or share them with his son on the other side of the table. The only thing she knew for certain was that neither of them spoke immediately.

And even though silence can last what feels like a lifetime, it can almost move faster than you blink.

For a moment, everything seems pretty normal as Maya poured herself a glass of orange juice and picked off of some fruitcake that one of the older Friar Family members had left. Honestly, Maya didn't know every single person that came to the ranch for the holidays, but she could usually make a good guess at their age based on the food they left behind.

Just about there is when Lucas pieces together what the papers are saying, "Why were you showing these to Maya without me?" A 'demand' might be too nice of a word to describe the way his words sound. Anger isn't just seething in and around the words but it infects the air. Maya had been frustrated in the days leading to this exact revelation but even she gets more upset than she was previously.

Les does not respond, and certainly doesn't have to with his son speaking so disrespectfully. As caught up with the times as the father was these days, one thing never waivers with Lester Friar: he expects respect. As Lucas fails to give that to him, the more it becomes obvious why he was never going to be the first to know.

"This is something you share with your kids first!"

"I am entitled to this information because you are my dad!"

"I should be the one telling Maya, not you!"

"This is a family matter first, and a friend matter second!"

Each minute grows increasingly hurtful. It seems that nothing is going to stop Lucas until Maya gets the edge of the table and sets down her glass. Tears are streaming down Lucas' cheeks while Les sits with his hands on his thigh, disappointed etched in every wrinkle. The break will only last for a second so she knows she must take advantage of it.

"I didn't realize I wasn't a part of this family, Lucas." Maya remarks, staring coolly and calmly at him. She always believed she was a member of the Friar Family, simply by having been dating Lucas for several years. She lived on the ranch, for crying out loud! If Conner is considered family, then she thought she ought to be too. Of course, she was a member of the Friar Family more than ever because, well, he was pregnant with a Friar.

"You know what I meant." Lucas grumbles, starting see the mistake in his words. It is too late as far as Maya is concerned. An apology should have never needed to be issued. She belongs her as much as he does, at least she did before…

"Forgive me, but I don't. I am pregnant with your child, Lucas Friar, which means married or not I belong to this family. I have as much right to know this as you do, first or not." Maya declares with her demeanor never compromising. Les does not need a moment to take the new information in and immediately jumps to his feet. Arms wrap around Maya with congratulations, but also apologies.

Les is familiar with the goings-on in their life and the conversation takes a sharp turn. Complaints about Lucas' poor judgment on the girl form the school, whose name Maya can't even remember now. Then there's the whole matter of Connor, who Lucas belittles for the unspoken things that he must have been ignoring all these years. The man in front of her is not the man she fell in love with when she was eighteen years old.

The reality that "people change" hits hard.

Mr. Matthews had taught her "people change people."

If Maya had known this is how things would turn out with Lucas…

Well, she'd have tucked her feelings for Lucas right back under the rug.

"I need space." Maya mumbles, nearly stumbling over her feet. She can hardly believe in a split second she's decided this, but she is committed. Neither Lucas nor Lester looks at her as she leaves the room. Presently they're arguing over what to do with her – as she were an object to be cared for no more than a couch, toy, or car. Maya wishes no more to be a part of Lucas' life.

"I need space from you." She whispers as she makes her way back upstairs with plans to lock the door behind her.

Lucas sits in the hallway with his back slumped against the door. This is hardly the first time that they've been in this position, on opposite sides of a wall having a disagreement. Of course, it's never been on something this big. Implying that Maya was little more than a friend to the Friar family was absolutely uncalled for, and he knows that now.

Unfortunately, he'd said many things he didn't mean. The anger that his father had been unwilling to share the news of his cancer diagnosis with him first stung. At a time in his life where he already feels like a proper failure, even his own father doesn't trust him enough to discuss his medical condition. Lucas is officially a stranger in his own family.

"Maya, I'm not even going to bother apologizing." Lucas begins. Well, he was beginning. The entire thought will likely get chopped into pieces as Maya shouts back at him, unwilling to remain silent in any conversation.

"Good! Save your breath." Her words aren't mean so much as tired.

After a sigh he continues, "But I want you to know that I'm struggling with a lot of stuff inside of me right now. I can't expect you to stay by my side while I figure it out…" Trailing off only opened the door.

"And I have no plans of doing that." Again, she sounds simply tired.

"But I also want you to know that I have every intention of marrying you. There's an engagement ring in the glass bowl on the dresser. I was going to ask last night but you were sick. And now we're fighting over my own stupidity – again." Self-depravation probably isn't the wisest choice, since it may open a door to a slew of insults he really, really doesn't want to hear from Maya's mouth. It certainly can't be taken back now, though.

There is a familiar clunk from within the room. Lucas knows that she's looking at the ring, "Not sure where you got the money for this," she declares.

Surely she was thinking he must have taken money to pay for it that they didn't have, which isn't necessarily wrong. They were very tight for cash pretty much all the time. To think that he just had the funds ready and chose not to pay bills instead, well, Maya must want to punch him the face in response.

"None of it matters now. I know you are going to leave me, but I hope that we come back together. I hope that you'll take that ring and remember that I have a life for us on this ranch. We have a future here." Here, in Texas. Here, in Austin. Here, at the ranch. Here, between them. This is where Lucas and Maya fell for one another wholly and this is where they'll grow old together too. Nothing will convince Lucas otherwise.

The sound of the clunk is followed by a clang, which he presumes is the box being tossed back into the glass. Maya taking the box with her is definitely a long shot but the best he can do is make arrangements for her at this point. If she won't let him take care of her then he at least knows someone who she will…

Lucas makes the painful walk to his old bedroom where he shuts and locks the door immediately. To ensure that nobody can hear him he slides into his closet and shuts the door. Dialing the phone number is familiar and maybe she's already dialing the number herself, but Lucas pleads that he's the first to reach him.

"Hey, buddy, can I get a favor from you?"

A/N2: I kind of want to change the entire outline because I thought of another character I could bring in... Who would you like to see?