For You

Happy Easter, all!

Chapter Six - Truth

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As he was greeted at the front door of the redhead's living space, he was denied the 'good-to-see-you-again' kiss that he normally placed on the teen's lips. Instead, Axel moved back, appearing to be in some sort of shock, shaking slightly. He closed the door after his guest and could do nothing more than stare at the man.

"Axel? Is everything okay?"

"Tell me I'm wrong."

"You're wrong? About what?"

Axel pressed himself back against the door. "About Zexion. About everything." Saïx visibly cringed with the mention of the slate-haired teen.

"Zexion? What about ... Zexion?" The blue-haired man was on edge now. Axel cowered, feeling an argument brewing. He hated fighting with his friends or lovers, but he couldn't pretend anymore.

"C'mon." Axel turned away, slinking off to his room, Saïx following behind him. The redhead curled up next to his headboard, cringing when the man sat a foot away from him. "Zexion's your nephew, right?" Saïx took in a shaky breath before nodding. "He told me to stay away from you today. That you had hurt him. Is that true?" Another delayed, forced nod. "He's my age, you know. He gave you this tie, just before you went to jail. Three years ago. That would make him fourteen, right? He was fourteen when you went to jail?"

Saïx bristled. "It's not what you think, Axel."

"I'm not done." Axel stated, monotone, curled into his ball, knees to his chest, his arms locking them in place. Saïx stilled, staring at the floor so that he wouldn't have to show his weakness to the teen. "His dad -- your brother -- hurt you. You said it had something to do with your going to jail." Another stiff nod before the man tried reaching out to the redhead to comfort him. "Don't touch me!" He snarled viciously before his eyes grew wide, realizing what he had just done. "I mean ... do you think now's the best time to be touching me? I ... I'm really confused right now."

"What do you think happened, Axel?" Saïx had withdrawn his fingertips quickly; almost afraid they would have been bitten off by the furious teen. Said teen whimpered, worry written all over his features.

"I'm gonna be blunt."

"That's alright. I just want you to know what really happened."

"You raped Zexion. You raped your nephew and that's why your brother wanted to hurt you. That's why you went to jail. Zexion trusted you and you betrayed him. He was fine at Rox's birthday, but then a month later he wouldn't talk or anything. He was broken. It fits, right? But it couldn't have been like that because that is ... that is ... I don't know what the hell it is, but it isn't good! But that's why you were so nervous whenever you would drive around the school. You knew that Zexion was around there somewhere and you would see him and things would turn out bad, right?" Axel was shaking and it was taking every fiber in Saïx's being to not just wrap his arms around the boy.

"It didn't happen like that."

"But it was still Zexion."

"Let me tell you what really happened?"

Axel fell silent and Saïx took that to mean that the redhead wouldn't interrupt.

"Zexion and I got along, really well and I had a cabin on a lake a few hours from here. I decided to take him up there so that he would have a quiet place, because I knew that he liked his quiet." Saïx peered at the redhead, catching sight of blank, emerald orbs just staring straight ahead. He himself was quivering, feeling strange to finally tell his tale to someone. "We spent a few weeks up there before school started and we would go swimming and boating and he would read or study or whatever he did. We had fun."

Saïx took a deep breath, glancing once more at the redhead to see if he was still okay. "Then I decided to throw a party on the last day we were up there. There was a lot of alcohol circling around and I managed to get hammered. Zexion was the only sober one by the end of it. I had even offered him something, but he refused. He seemed so nervous. Everyone left in the early hours of the morning, leaving just the two of us."

Another deep breath. Axel felt a pang in his chest, able to see exactly what the blue-haired man was telling him. Unable to take it any longer, he edged his foot just a little bit closer, wincing when it made contact with body heat. Saïx knew not to press his luck and kept his hands to himself.

"Zexion came over to me where I sat on the couch. He told me that I looked about ready to drop and if there was anything he could do to make it better. It was then that I noticed how close he was to me. Almost in my lap. I didn't answer, trying to preoccupy myself with business-related things, but nothing seemed to work. A neighbor that had been at the party had been flirting with me, leaving me with something that I shouldn't have had around the kid."

Axel was beginning to get nervous now. He could almost see how it would play out.

"I remember that he noticed my hard-on and he smiled cockily. He asked if he could 'help me out with that' and the next thing I knew his hand was down in my lap. I didn't ... I didn't realize what was going on at the time, but the next thing I knew, I had him pressed down on the floor, moaning and going on like someone who had never felt sex before. But, of course he wouldn't have. He was only fourteen."

Saïx paused, his own eyes now glazed over in remembrance. Axel could tell that he regretted what he had done to Zexion. "He didn't realize how badly it would hurt for a new kid getting pounded by a drunk man and started crying, every so often asking if I could make it stop hurting. Never once did he ask to stop. I don't know if I would have been able to, but he didn't ask me to. He knew what he was doing. I didn't even know who it was pinned beneath me. Not until the next morning when we were getting ready to go home. Then I saw everything replay in my mind and I yelled at him. I asked him how he could let me do such a thing to him or why he hadn't gotten me to stop. I asked if he knew how much trouble I could get in. He wasn't smiling. He wouldn't even look at me. I know he regretted it.

"When we got home, the first thing he did was run to my brother and tell him that I hurt him while we were away. He told him his own version of what happened. That I had forced him down when he was minding his own business. That I had done it more than once. That I didn't stop when he asked me to. All lies. But to my brother, it was his precious son's word against his drunken weirdo for a brother. He called the cops before coming at me with a butcher knife."

Axel shivered. Maybe he hadn't been ready to know all of this. "But Zexion was broken. When he came back, he was broken." His voice was small, as though he was trying to portray how broken Zexion would have been.

"The trial weighed down on him heavily. It was hard on him. In the end he refused to speak to the judge or even the lawyers. But they already had enough on me. I was thrown in jail and Zexion broke. I don't claim that I am innocent. I did have sex with him. But it wasn't like I knew any better. I would never have done anything in my right mind to hurt that boy. Do you believe me, Axel?"

Axel tensed, coiling in closer on himself. He hadn't heard his name in a while and he had thought that Saïx forgot about him. "I ... I think. I think I believe you. But he was your nephew!"

"I was drunk. I didn't know any better. But I told you that I was horrible. I'll leave now, if you want me to."

"No!" The word was out before Axel really knew what the blue-haired man had said. "I don't want you to go. I want to know if there's still a way we can be together."

"Even after you've learned all this? I'm a monster, Axel."

"I know. That's why I want you to touch me right now. To show me that I can still love you even though you've done all this bad stuff."

Saïx stiffened, unsure of what the redhead was asking. Seeing the hesitation, Axel forced himself to uncurl, taking deep breaths to keep himself calm. The blue-haired man held out his hand, shaking with anticipation. "Touch me. Don't grope me or anything. Just, like, touch my arm or something. I don't want to be disgusted with you, but, if I can't handle you just touching my arm, how can I be your boyfriend?" Saïx nodded slowly, closing his eyes before he could see Axel's disgusted reaction. But all he could feel was the warmth coming from the teen's skin as his fingers dusted over the limb, resting on the redhead's bare forearm.

Axel's breath hitched and he stiffened, but loosened slowly, letting his breath hiss through his teeth. "Fire." His voice held the hint of tears.

"What?" Saïx opened one golden orb, confused by the relief in his lover's voice.

"I still feel fire when you touch me."

"I'm guessing this is a good thing?"

"The best." Axel smiled sheepishly. "Kiss me?"

Saïx stiffened once more. "Unless you don't want - mff" Axel was cut off when Saïx desperately pressed their lips together. The teen moved his other arm up to wrap around the blue-haired man's neck, making sure he couldn't break away. When they both needed air, Axel panted into the elder's neck. "I ... I can forgive you for what you did to Zexion. I guess I was right and it didn't matter to me. Just don't leave me, okay?"

Axel began to worry when he didn't receive an answer until he felt Saïx's fingers dancing around his waist. "Axel, I think I love you." All Axel could do was moan as his lips were taken over once again.

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To be Continued

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Okay, so, I know that it might be bad for Axel to be okay with it, but, he's someone that lives in the present. Keep that in mind. Comes up a lot.

~xbuttonsx~