A/N: Because I just had to.

Disclaimer: I do not own Young Justice. Also, spoiler alerts if you haven't watched up to "True Colors".

The SeaArrow Chronicles

"Um, hey Dad, I'd like you to meet my um, yeah…"

Artemis squeezed Kaldur's hand and choppily gestured towards Black Manta. Sportsmaster didn't even glance once at his daughter and her fiancé. His beady brown eyes remained pinned on Manta, and a suffocating fog of silence filled the room.

Manta narrowed his eyes.

Sportsmaster did the same.

And they just glared silently at each other for all eternity's worth.

It was awkward.

Very awkward.

Like, skin-crawling-awkward.

"Remember when you tried to kill me," Manta grumbled.

"Remember when you sent Deathstroke to kill me," Sportsmaster responded as curtly.

"Remember when you tried to kill my son."

"Remember when your son actually killed my daughter?"

Yeah…

Awkward.

Hey, Artemis here to tell you a little something about my family.

Firstly, an introduction on all the players: myself, my husband Kaldur'ahm, his father (we'll just call him Manta), my father Lawrence, my mother Paula, my sister Jade, her husband Roy, and their daughter Lian.

Once upon a time in a land far, far away (except not really), I was part of a covert team of young superheroes under the "management" of the Justice League. Kaldur was my leader, Roy was on my team, and we fought against The Light, which consisted of Manta, Lawrence, and Jade. Are you confused yet? Good, because this buggy is about to become a lot bumpier.

It turned out Roy was actually a clone designed by The Light to replace the original Roy Harper and act as a double-agent/mole/spy/bitch-slave (Jade's term, I swear to God). My father was his "handler", and could "freeze" him on command in order to "download" information, and who knows what Jade did to him then… Anyway, eventually, Roy succeeded in delivering the Justice League to The Light, and was finally free of his "duties". That's when my covert team comes in and saves the day.

Fast forward five years where Kaldur discovers the dark side does indeed have cookies, or biological fathers in his case, and abandons us for Manta. However, this is all a ruse, as he's working as a double-agent (notice a theme here). During one of the missions, he "kills" me, and coincidentally gains a new right-hand woman, Tigress. If you're not one for subtleties, I was Tigress, also working as a double-agent.

However, no one cared to inform my father and Jade of this sneaky plan, and they go beserk trying to avenge my death (isn't that sweet), and my father nearly kills Manta. Yeah… we try never to bring that up, ever.

Oh, and sometime during that five-year-skip, Roy elopes with Jade, and waste no time acting out the birds and the bees and creating cute little Lian.

So it's no wonder my father and Kaldur's are extremely competitive during Thanksgiving football games, BBQ cook-offs, and even backyard pruning. One time, Kaldur and I asked them to help us trim the hedges in our backyard, and came back to a mish-mash of Atlantis and every sporting paraphernalia molded into the greenery.

My father also likes to pretend Roy doesn't exist. I also suspect the code-word to shut him down is still effective, because there have been multiple occasions where I've found Roy with an ice-pack pressed to his man-treasures and confusion dripping through his pained features…

Jade and Kaldur also don't like each other, considering how their first encounter consisted of her paralyzing him with some form of crazy toxin. She enjoys making references to how cats hunt and eat fish in front of him, and he likes to leave bags of kitty litter under her pillow.

The only sane ones in this family are myself, my mother, and Lian. Kaldur's mother sometimes visits, but things get real strange real fast because there's always a Beyonce song blasting from an unknown location.

Dear Diary,

We are babysitting Lian today, along with my father and Artemis's. (Please take note I did not make it clear if those two are aiding us in the watching of Lian, or if they are part of the "babies" we are supervising.)

Anyway, there is an argument occurring over what movie Lian should watch before nap-time.

My father insists on "The Little Mermaid".

But Lawrence will not cease in switching the channel to today's football game.

Artemis and I are merely waiting for Lian to fling her bowl of mashed peas at them both.

Sincerely,
Kaldur'ahm

A/N: I apologize for my brain.