Dear Writers,
For Leviathan's sake did I not just inform you the relationship between myself and Kirsty has yet to occur? What makes you think we're producing unexpected offspring by now? Ugh. If I succeed in stealing her heart, your stories might encourage her own desire for a child. And Er- let's just say I'm not necessarily prepared for such responsibility. Or the horrors known from a woman's pregnancy that males end up suffering along as well.
*shudder* Sincerely,
Xipe Totec