Have my Cake and Eat it too!
Chapter 6
By Otaku no Baka
Warning: This is a side chapter, after this it is nothing but Russiamerica goodness but I needed to establish the FrUk pairing of this ficlet . My muse wouldn't stop bugging me about it. It does go along with the plot though. Sorry about the delay in updates! My job is kicking my ass once again and I am taking weird medication (weee...) that is making me queasy and kinda out of it. But I am finished with one chapter already and all I have to do is the birthday chapter after this as well as the final chapter before the epilogue! So the next parts should come out sooner! (I'm trying dammit.) I dunno how I feel about this lemon since it's something new :/
Had to post this...several times and I still don't think it came out right. For god's sake....
Thank everyone who is reading this, favoring, reviewing, etc. as well as my Russian translator Tanya-san for putting up with me.
If I owned Hetalia you think I would be done with my cosplay by now.
Hey England!
Me and Vanya are having a really good time in Hawaii! Besides an incident when Russia's heart fell out near the pool area, we are having no problems with the hotel or people!
Oh yeah, you should have seen Vanya's face when we hit the beach; it was just too awesome! He kinda has a tan now but it's like really *scratched out several times* cute! Oh and he keeps commenting on how I should stop eating so much mcdonalds because I don't look as wonderful as I did during the cold war that jerk! I used to eat Twinkies and hostess cakes back then because of all the damn paranoia and that's worse!
The drinks here really suck ass though; most of them are fruity as hell and Russia apparently drinks just vodka. (My lover hates them enough to mumble a kol.) We met Hawaii and I royally complained! (But hell the weather is too awesome though! Even though Vanya complains that it's too hot but he says it's better than being cold as hell.)
There is a picture of America and Russia on the beach; Russia looking slightly darker than normal. Both of them had on sunblock and shorts; America had on stars and stripes while Russia had blue ones with a cute snowman on it. They had their sunglasses up and were hugging close smiling, Alfred had to put up bunny ears near the shooting.
P.S. General Winter is real and almost ruined our honeymoon! But we conned him some vodka so he's chilling and enjoying the weather. (Russia says that the general is so used to the winter that he doesn't know what to do with himself out here ahahahahaha!)
There is another picture of General Winter in blublockers and shorts as well; on the boxers it reads in Russian, "If you get a head cold it's probably my fault." He is smirking and showing the peace sign at the camera.
P.S.S. Have you hooked up with anyone yet? France? I mean god Iggy you need to get laid! I still remember you telling me to give you a rubber I was like 'what the fuck...' I thought you were hitting on me! Didn't you used to get mad mad *scratched out again* women and men back in the day? It's like everyone is having sex but you.
P.S.S.S Come to my awesome birthday party in July and take France with you! Don't bring up past crap either! Sorry I punched you out last b-day! Me and Mattie are having a joined once since our B-days are right next to each other! (That's Canada in case you forgot...again.)
P.S.S.S.S. Horny Snow...I mean Russia says "hi."
England didn't know what to say besides 'stupid git.' His brain had crashed down and he wasn't in his 'refined British gentleman' mode. It seemed to happen the times he hung around other idiotic nations, (especially America and France.)
"Oh is that America's letter?" France was resting his head on England's shoulder; the British man could feel and smell his breath near his face.
"What are you still doing here you frog? I thought I told you to go home after the wedding?" England turned around and glared; trying to hide the letter. Francis was still quicker and managed to stanch it out his hands.
"Oi that America s'amuse n'est pas il?" Francis chuckled as he read the words. "Hmmm...so General Winter does exist...mmm..."
He started to laugh and Arthur fumed some more. "Dammit don't read that it isn't addressed to you!"
"Then why did dear Alfred put "To England and France" on the envelope?"
England sighed and rubbed his head. "Whatever, I'm going to make some tea."
"I guess I will follow you then." The Brit wondering what France was up to. It didn't seem like him when he wasn't groping or molesting anything that moved. Actually since the few days before the wedding, Francis was actually...tolerable. He didn't randomly touch him as much, he cooked and helped cleaned, and he didn't surprise him with kisses or attempts to get him drunk. It was making England paranoia and interested at the same time.
France sighed and watched Arthur's back. He was trying a different approach to get his dear England than the usual. If someone like Russia could get a nation like America, then him the country of love could get some silly British man that he knew forever.
It was difficult to not molest England so much; there were so many opportunities! Oh the time that he went to sleep with his book on his chest, the nation's mouth half open and tempting. Or the time that Arthur was in the cabinets under the sink and bent over showing that bite-able and delicious ass of his.
Non, he would have to curb patience. Walking side by side down the hallway of England's house, he started to hum a familiar tune.
"Hey stop singing pub and go you loon."
He laughed and wrapped an arm around England. "And why not? I think the song suits you."
England waved him off as he entered his kitchen, grabbing a kettle and setting it on the stove. "You want something?"
"Non I think I will take a bath; you want to join me?"
France groaned and almost smacked his head; dammit. He was trying to avoid perverted sounding topics or words since he knew how little set the British man off.
England raised a big eyebrow. "Yeah I want to take a bath but not with you; my back is killing me."
"How about I rub it for you then? Since your hot water here isn't plentiful there would not be enough for the both of us no?"
England thought about it; France was right. There wasn't enough hot water generated in his heater for some reason and he was in the process of fixing it. So there would not be enough for the both of them. But this was France...But he was a gentleman and not just a complete asshole.
Normally England would just say 'too bad and sod off,' but today was a good day and since Francis haven't been acting completely asinine, he nodded his head. "Alright we can take a bath together but no funny stuff! If you do I'll kill you."
'This was a dumb ass idea.'
England sunk his head into the bubbly bath water. France managed to con him into using some kind of bubble mixture, so the whole place smelled like lavender and spices. Ugh.
His bathroom was large enough despite what the Frenchman said; with a separate room for a shower as well as a big marble tub, with a lion head on the end. Francis was on one end and Arthur was on the other.
"I thought your back was hurting?"
"Shut up frog." He wanted to sink lower if possible. They were on opposite sides of the tube, Francis lazily soaking, his arms on the side of the tube.
They sat in silence until France spoke again. "Do you still feel bad about the wedding England?"
"What?" Arthur sputtered and sat up. "Why would I feel bad?"
Francis rolled his eyes. "Isn't it obvious my dear England? You had feelings for your former colleague."
The dark haired man sighed. "I raised America so of course I have feelings for him."
"You know what I mean exactly Arthur."
England made a face but didn't respond. He was right, of course he had those feelings for Alfred. He raised the boy since he was discovered decades ago, watched him turn into a man, and was still watching over him secretly. England still recalled all the times he attempted to cook for him and the smiles that he would give him when he would visit when the boy was younger; America was his heart.
"Things change Francis." The British man mumbled and turned his head. Part of him still wanted America and the incident months ago refueled that desire. Not only that but part of him wanted to be with Russia too, despite having problems and disliking the manipulative bastard. He wanted to have a ménage à trois relationship and live with the both of them. Part of him was disgusted since the church upholds such brazen bigamy but he never went along with their ideals much in the first place.
He gave up when the wedding was announced, part of him not having the nerve to even suggest a thing to the couple. 'Maybe I'm just lonely; it's been bad here after Alfred left.' England secretly enjoyed the summit meets as well as get together since he could hang around other people like himself, no matter how many times they pissed him off. It was better than being in this big house, with nobody but the fairies and the unicorn who occasionally visit that only certain people could see. His other brother nations still cursed him after all these years.
Arthur was snapped out of his daydream when the water sloshed and France got closer to him. "W...What are you doing you stupid bloody frog face!"
"You seemed stressed so I am going to help you." The lighter blond knew England and how his mind worked but didn't enjoy it. "Now turn around so I can wash your back s'il vous plaît."
Arthur made a face but grumbled; turning around and hugging his knees. He was prepared in case the pervert tried to jump him, since his wand was in the bathroom with them.
Francis shook his head and tsk; he reached over to grab the bath oil that he brought beforehand on the counter. Putting a generous among on his hands, he placed his hands on Arthur's back, who jumped and shivered.
'He's only going to give me a massage.' England repeated that again and again and he felt those fingers dig into his back. The British nation sighed and relaxed more, folding his legs under him.
The blond French man was trying to not think how easy it would be to molest the man under him and instead focused on digging his hands into hard muscle. England appeared scrawny and slim because of his height compared to the other nations, but he was actually muscular. Not as much as Russia or America but the smooth back was still nice.
Arthur moaned under him as he hit a knot and worked it out. Francis bit his lip and tried to restrain himself but habits were habits.
'Man this feels good.' France's hands were working magic on him; he didn't know how much he needed this. "Use your hands lower and ohhhh."
'Putain England hush.' The blond was at the nation's lower back now, dangerous close to the 'bad area.' He was at the point that he wanted to shag the man right now but no that would only make Arthur punch him in the face and kick him out the house.
Instead he focused on the man's sides near his ribs, going up slowly. By now the Brit was sighing and wiggling under him.
England was trying to not think how good this felt and was kinda of embarrassed that he was getting hard off of this. 'Ugh it's France of all people and mmmm..yeah.'
The dark haired nation almost threw his head back in pleasure if it wasn't for Francis' hands on his shoulders. He massaged them as well as his neck, debating if he should find a excuse to run his hands through the man's hair. "Let me wash you hair as well England." The French man was shocked at how normal his voice sound.
"Huh...oh yeah sure." Green eyes blinked in a daze as he turned his head; England was so lost in the massage that he kinda forgot everything else.
France squeezed some shampoo next and started to rub and massage the man's scalp; getting more and more turned on when the magical nation wiggled and moaned under his touches. 'Nique maybe I should just say forget and then...' He was imaging what he could be doing with those fingers, stretching and pushing with the shampo-
"All done my dear England!"
Arthur ducked his head under and sighed. "Ummm..thanks Francis." He coughed and blushed. "I'm going to wash up a bit and get out so...SO!!!!"
England yelped as he was tackled over; a mouth was on him as well as hands. Good God they were everywhere, massaging and rubbing against the front of his body.
"I need to do this side as well dearest." He breathed; still inches from his lips. Francis was on top of him; blond hair dripping water on his face. England flushed red and tried to push the man off.
"You just want to sex me up you idiot!" Hell he wanted to be sexed up now. He haven't gotten laid in god knows how long and has been embarrassingly using his hand and other means.
"Hmm...maybe." Hands rubbed against his chest and England tried to not close his eyes at the contact. No he will not submit to his primal urges and oh god that felt good when France was rubbing his thighs now.
The lighter blond smirked; he could already see Iggy hard as a rock under the bath water. Oh no but he won't be taking the direct approach this time. He rubbed and dig into his thighs, making sure to avoid the most obvious part.
Arthur was clinching his fingers now, trying to decide if he should push the man off or just arch up in wanton desire. It was bloody fucking obvious how turned on he was now but France wasn't touching him there at all. When the man started to work on his calves he wanted to scream.
'Oh all that is holy and great fucking hell just get me off already!' He glared and Francis only smirked and continued his work. He be dammed if he would beg the bastard!
"England is there something else you need~?" The nation literally purred and England shut his eyes and tried to think of anything but sex.
"No....No..." 'Yes yes yes!'
"Are you sure?" Breath was over his cock and he almost screamed; that was his breaking point.
"Dammit I want you to suck me off you fucking ass frog!" He grabbed the man's head and pushed him down towards his erection.
Francis would of laughed if it wasn't for the fact that he opened his mouth and took half of Arthur's cock without warning. England hissed and a good stream of curses flew out of his mouth. "Don't do that so suddenly and ahhh..bloody hell don't use your tongue there."
The blond french man made a hummm sound, causing the nation under him to moan and jerk his hips up. Francis didn't bat an eye and went down with the motion; lifting the brushy brow man's hips up.
"Holy hell..." The bath water sloshed around as he practically fucked the french man's mouth. England covered his eyes as he listened to every slurp and felt every time Francis would run his tongue over a sensitive area.
"Ngh..." He wanted to curse at how soon he was reaching his breaking point. Iggy felt a finger try to push into his ass and he jumped. "Wh...what...ah..." He accidentally pushed down on it, causing it to go up to the knuckle. The dark haired blond tried to open his eyes to see what the hell France was doing and ended up coming at the site of him fingering his ass.
'Hahaha so soon...' Francis wanted to laugh at his poor England but he was focusing on swallowing the salty sperm going down his throat and trying to prepare his pretty while he was distracted. He pulled off of him, up to two fingers now with the help of the oil he used earlier.
"Francis stop doing that..." England opened both green lusted filled eyes as he kinda went down from his high. Good God his senses still felt overloaded. He ran a hand through his damp hair as he wiggled on those intruding digits. "Bloody fuck...don't lick there."
"Why not?" The lighter blond haired nation was pulling the man's foreskin back with his mouth, lapping up the come that was trapped under it. He licked all around the exposed head, making ol' dear England moan so wantonly.
"Be...because its dirty you perverted frog!" He felt full and strange with three fingers in his ass, stretching and probing. Arthur couldn't remember the last time he actually did this and it was turning him on again.
"This is why I am cleaning you up!" Francis made a ooh sound. "Look at all of this foutre Ah! I see you are back to full mast now!" He insinuated this with a stroking, licking his lips at the bead of pre-cum and left over come from the last ejaculation.
"Why you..OHHH..." England gasped and arched his back as France held back a smirk. The french man chuckled evilly as he started to poke and push against the man's prostate.
"S...Stop....doing that...." But the bushy brow man's body was betraying him, thrusting and impaling himself further on those fingers.
"So you want me to stop doing this and just take you then? Alright." England bit his lip and was about to say, 'fuck no you know what I mean you bloody dumb ass frog,' until those fingers parted from his body.
"Huh...?" He was slightly disoriented from the loss and gasped as he was flipped over. Arthur cursed again, sputtering and coughing as he came up from the water. "I could have hit my chin and bit my tongue you bastard!"
France shrugged his shoulders, moving behind to straddle the man under him. England froze as he felt the head of the nation's cock rub against him. He was about to turn around and protest until he felt it penetrate his ass.
"Ah you bloody fucker! I didn't want to do it bare like this!" The bushy brow nation grind his teeth as the cock pushed in further. "At least you could have used protection! I know how much you like to spread your love around."
"I'm quite...fine...Arthur, I do check myself." Oh how have he been waiting to do this; he was to the hilt and was having trouble to not just come inside the man already. He wanted to do this since they were younger, of all those times he put his dear England in robes and dresses...
England sat his elbows down on the edge of the bathtub; trying to adjust at the erection filling him up. France wasn't the biggest guy he had but it was still uncomfortable. He grunted and buried his face into the marble as the lighter blond nation started to move inside of him.
Francis held onto the man's hips as he thrust inside slowly, moaning at the feeling of the nation's inner walls squeezing his cock. He felt England move along with him, both of them going in sync.
"Move..faster you bastard." England shut his eyes as he felt Francis go harder now, changing the angle of his thrusts. He almost jumped as he hit against his prostate and the pleasure pooled around his erection, making a pool of pre-cum spill out. "Arg."
"Hmmm..guess my technique isn't that bad is it dear England?" The french man leaned over on Arthur's back and whispered in his ear. He reached up and used one hand pinched and twist those rose red nipples.
"Shut...you...face...ahh.." The British man panted as Francis fucked him in full earnest, making the bathwater slosh and go all over the floor. Those bad fingers touched his flat stomach before reaching his cock, stroking and rubbing the sensitive head under his foreskin.
"But you look so cute Arthur." A tongue as well as teeth nipped his ear and he groaned as he came into the man's hand. England shut his eyes as he felt the nation pump him dry, the white substance mixing into the bath water. He groaned as the cock inside of his ass expanded and then something warm fill him up.
Iggy just laid there, grumbling and trying to get his breath back. It was too hot in here and he wanted to go to sleep.
"Dear England don't sleep in here." He felt something part from him and shivered at the loss. Francis was whispering in his ear again.
"Hmmm...so tired."
The lighter blond french man laughed. "Such an old man..."
England didn't have the strength to argue with him right now; he groaned as he felt fingers in his stretched sore behind again. "Stop...doing that you frog."
"Mmm...but you look so exotic dripping out my essence." France never seen England look so good; his eyes half lidded and sated and his face buried in his arms. His ass was still dripping with cum and he felt around, almost tempting to go again, almost.
'Mmm...he's worn out but that will change.' Oh yes it will change; he wanted to do this again and again and again...
"Wake up Arthur and come on." He pulled out and smacked England's ass lightly; the man only mumbled and tried to go back to sleep. "Oi, none of that." France shook his head and tried to help get the man out and into something.
After fighting with England to put some clothes on, he sat down in Artie's bedroom. There was some British game show on, where people were trying to beat some of the smartest people in the world in order to be like Bill Gates or something.
Both of them had on robes, with Francis fanning himself with a brise fan. England was laying on his stomach and actually watching the program.
"He's wrong you know." The British man motioned towards the tv sluggishly. "I know because I lived in that era." God he was tired; he knew it had been a long time but damn. His whole lower body felt like jello and he was feeling lethargic, but he wasn't a geezer dammit.
"Mmm..." France pushed a strain of his hair back into the ponytail he hastily put on; he had to fix it later. They both sat in silence for a while until Francis put his fan down to lay next to England.
"Don't...molest me or else; I should kick your balls in for doing that in the tub, without a condom no less."
"But you enjoyed it anyway didn't you?" At no replied he laughed and snuggled next to Arthur.
England didn't know what to do; he gave France what he wanted and got rid of some sexual tension and yet the man was acting so casual about it. He sighed and just relaxed near the other nation. Arthur had an idea that the french blond wanted to probably sex him up again. 'Bollocks I am actually enjoying the idea of it...' He shook his head and instead focused on the program.
They watched the show in silence but Francis was secretly plotting ways to get England to sleep with again.
blublockers: Big massive sunglasses: http: // www. esperanza-atl. com/Esp/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/white4. jpg
The punch on Alfred's birthday is from this picture: http: // media. photobucket. com/image/alfred%20america%?o=20birthday/girlgok/Hetalia/CelibrateResponsibly-1. jpg?o=2
s'amuse n'est pas il: Is having fun isn't he?
s'il vous plaît: Please
Putain: Dammit
Nique: fuck
foutre: cum *hides face* I am learning dirty French words!
France and England are watching Eggheads: http : // en. wikipedia. org/wiki/Eggheads
Brisé fan: A fan made of decorated sticks without a fan leaf and that was popular in the seventeen and eighteen hundreds.
I found something interesting about circumcision that was a deciding factor about the lemon. Apparently it's popular in United States (which is why it's strange for Alfred,) as well as the Middle East, Korea, South Asia (but not Japan,) and Africa nations. It's not that common in the United Kingdom though. http : // en wikipedia .org/wiki/History_of_male_circumcision Oh god I cannot believe I am looking up information to finish lemons.
Ménage à trois: Means having a threesome but it also means having a three way relationship as well
This was a pain because the format suddenly decided to be evil and not come out right; for everyone who reviewed about the mistake thanks again!