A/N: So I'm back a little earlier than a week, and I may have lied last chapter. I originally only planned to update once a week, but my muse has ran away with me and I've gotten pretty far ahead in this story so updates will be more frequent as long as you guys are still interested! The last chapter wasn't quite as popular as the ones before, so I'm hoping I'm not losing you guys, I still have so much planned for this story.

Only a little over a week until the next Chicago Fire! So excited, the promo pics look insane, so it should be a good one! I'm secretly hoping for multiple Dawsey moments that episode. We only have 5 episodes left this season and I'm really hoping for a Dawsey reunion before this season ends. We all know they are meant to be and I know that although Derek Haas like to tease us, he knows they are meant to be too.

For those of you that have asked about an update to After The Smoke Clears, it is still in the works… I promise it is getting there and whenever it is finished I will be updating!

Disclaimer: Still own nothing, all rights are reserved for Derek Haas, Dick Wolf, and NBC. Those lucky ducks.

Brett

I had a great night with Cruz. It had really felt like we got our relationship back on track. He'd taken me out, we had a long talk, and I had spent the night. It was nice. All of it. The smile was still planted on my face at 8 the next morning when I left his place.

I walk up to our apartment door and wonder how Gabby's night went with Casey, hoping she had as great a night as I did. She had told me Casey was coming over for dinner and a movie, when I wiggled my eyebrows suggestively at her she had rolled her eyes and told me that was not going to happen in no uncertain terms. I could only laugh. Those two were kidding themselves, they both loved each other. I didn't get to see too much of the two of them together, but the little that I did it was clear. Even now when they weren't together it was clear. They loved each other. There was no doubt about that, even if the two of them didn't realize it.

I go to push my key in the lock only to find the door unlocked. I'm not sure whether to worry, or not. Two different thoughts running through my head. Either someone had broken in, or the two of them had gotten too preoccupied to lock the door. I shook my head at that thought, but slowly pushed the door open anyways.

The place didn't look ransacked, but once I stepped inside completely I realized that the two thoughts I had before couldn't compare to what I was seeing now.

Gabby lay curled in a ball on the couch in a restless sleep. Her face puffy and red and her hair a tangled mess. The kitchen still held the dirty dishes from the night before. Two pints of ice cream sat melting on the coffee table. The TV had the menu to the DVD they were watching playing over and over, the upbeat music and Gabby's little whimpers in her sleep the only thing echoing through the apartment.

Something had happened between the two, and from the state of the apartment, and the sad girl on the couch I knew that it couldn't have been good.

When I look back at Gabby her eyes are now open and I can see just how bloodshot they are. She doesn't say anything and neither do I, but it only takes a few seconds for her to completely wake up from whatever bad dream she had been in and come back to reality, only to apparently realize reality was just as much of a nightmare. There are tears in her eyes in an instant and a sob leaves her lips and I am on her in a second.

"Oh Gabby, honey, what happened?" I whisper, sitting down on the floor in front of the couch and resting a comforting hand on her back, brushing the hair out of her face with the other.

I'd never seen her like this. This lost and heartbroken, her eyes full of so much despair that they were almost lifeless. Like all the emotions she was feeling were too much for her eyes to even portray.

She sucks in a couple of breaths, trying to get a grip over herself, but fails miserable. The tears just keep coming fast and hard. "Gabs…" I whisper.

She finally composes herself enough to talk, and it's then that I realize just how raspy her voice is and I wonder how much sleep she has actually gotten, and how much crying she has done. "He knows."

I look at her in confusion for a moment, before it finally clicks. Casey knows. She told him about the baby. From the state she is in I easily guess that he didn't take it well.

"Okay…" I say softly, not sure what else to say and not wanting to push her. Hot tears are still streaming down her cheeks and I'm still rubbing her back, trying to soothe her as much as possible, though I know it is probably futile. The only person who can truly make Gabby Dawson feel better is the only person capable of making her feel this way in the first place, this heartbroken and lost.

Her next words come out in a whimper and if I wasn't paying as close attention to her as I was I'm sure I wouldn't hear them. "He, he left." She cries, "I, I told him and he, he walked out."

"Oh Gabby." Sobs take over her body once again, and I crawl on the couch bringing her into my arms as best as I can, wanting to comfort her as much as possible. "It's gonna be okay." I try.

She shakes her head. "No Sylvie… I, I really screwed this all up." She pauses to hiccup, her voice still so raspy and heartbroken that every word she says is breaking my own heart. "I should've told him sooner. It's all, it's all my fault."

"This isn't your fault Gabby. Okay? You were scared, no one can blame you for that." I soothe, but it only makes her cry more.

"He hates me…" She whimpers, and I'm not entirely sure if she is talking to me or just talking in general. She's barely acknowledged my presence, too many tears blurring her vision.

"Casey could never hate you Gabby… he loves you." I realize those aren't the best words when she only cries more, but before I can continue she beats me too it. Her next words breaking my heart as her hand comes to rest on her stomach.

"I, I can't do this, I can't do this alone, Sylvie… I can't." She whimpers, her biggest fear finally confessed.

I force her to sit up enough that I can rest my hands on her cheeks, forcing her to look at me. "You are never going to be alone Gabriella Dawson. You got it? I promise you that. You've got so many people who love you." I opt to leave Casey out of that remark, knowing that it would probably be more harm than good to the state she is in now. "I promise you, I am not going to let you do this alone." I convince her.

She shakes her head, but says nothing more, and I hold her close and let her cry. Realizing this is probably what she really needs. To let it all out after so long of keeping it all in.

It's almost an hour later that she finally drifts off to sleep and looking down at the broken girl whose head is resting in my lap, her face still full of tear stains, I know I needed to do everything in my power to be there for her through this.

Kelly

Walking into the apartment at 4am I don't expect to find Matt there at all, let alone ten sheets to the wind, nursing what I realized was my almost empty bottle of scotch, and beer bottles littering the counter.

From what I was told he was supposed to be having dinner with Gabby at her place, I honestly hadn't expected him to be home at all tonight with the way the two of them had been warming up to each other again.

Clearly something had happened, and from the mess of alcohol that surrounded the blonde I could tell it hadn't been good.

I cautiously walk up behind him, making my way over to the fridge and grabbing a beer of my own. He doesn't even acknowledge me, only throws back another shot of the scotch. In any other circumstances I probably would have gave him hell for drinking my bottle, but clearly this was serious. Matt Casey wasn't this guy. I knew what ever happened between him and Gabby had rattled him enough to cause a late night drinking binge, even with the break up I had convinced him not to do that, so this was bad. Really bad.

His silence eventually starts to get to me and I ask, "What's going on man?"

His eyes meet mine and there is a look there that I had never seen before in the 8 plus years of knowing Matt Casey.

He pours another shot and throws it back, whipping his mouth before finally speaking. "She's pregnant."

I almost choke on the beer I've just drunk. My mind racing. Pregnant. What? But most importantly, who. "Beth?" I stutter.

Casey laughs humorlessly and shakes his head. "Nope!" He takes a long swig of the bottle, not even bothering with the shot glass this time. Now I'm just confused. "Dawson." He confirms.

My eyes go wide and I'm sure my mouth has dropped. In the few minutes that I'm silent Casey manages to stumble to the fridge and grab out another beer. Sitting once again and popping the top, drinking a quarter of it in record time before I finally find my voice.

"Dawson? Dawson's pregnant?" I ask his disbelievingly. Dawson looked like a lost puppy the majority of the time she was around Casey. He looked the same around her. There was no way Dawson could've slept with someone else. I didn't think she had it in her. Hell, I didn't think Casey had it in him either, but he had done it.

I now don't blame Matt for the state he was in. The girl he loved was having a baby, someone else's baby. I'd be this way too. I can't even imagine what Matt is feeling… He pulls me out of my thoughts with his next words. "I'm gonna be a Dad." He slurs, completely throwing me for a loop.

I shake my head, trying to process the little information I had been given. "Wait, Dawson's pregnant…? And you are the father…?" I ask, trying to figure this mess out that had Casey doing some serious damage to his liver.

He nods. "Yup."

I shake my head again. "Isn't this a good thing?" I question, not really sure on his angle here. Casey wanted kids. He'd wanted to be a dad for years now. He loved Dawson, they were getting along again, or at least they had been. What was the problem?

Casey rolls his eyes at my words and takes a swig of his beer. "She's known for a month Kelly. A month." He hisses. "She's seen me what, every day? Since she found out. And she never told me. God, she's been working Kelly! She's a damn firefighter Kelly! Do you know how much danger she put herself in!?" He hollers, though I know that last question is rhetorical. We were all firefighters, we all knew the danger.

I quickly realize that this has nothing to do with the baby. Matt isn't mad or sad about the baby. In fact, I'm sure once the dust settles he's going to be pretty damn happy about it, maybe scared, but definitely happy. Right now he was mad at Gabby. Mad that he wasn't told about it. Mad that she could have been hurt under his watch. Just mad. And I was sure, though he wouldn't admit it, mad that he hadn't realized it during that time on his own.

"Matt…" He's quick to cut me off.

"God Kelly. She just… she's got to be what…" He pauses, trying to do the math in his head on how long they'd been apart. I role my eyes when this takes much longer than it should in his drunken state. "Three? No four?! Four! At least four months pregnant!" He pauses for a moment, proud of himself for figuring that out on his own before the angry look takes over again and he is back to ranting. "She's four months pregnant Kelly… She's known for a month. How could she not tell me?" He asks now, his voice softening and I can hear the genuine confusion and hurt in his voice now.

I shake my head at him. "Casey man, think back to where the two of you were a month ago." I can see the wheels turning in his head, but I interrupt the thought process knowing it could take longer than I was whiling to wait with him still in this drunken state and not able to make many coherent thoughts. "You'd slept with Beth. Gabby was just finding out… Then the two of you spent the past three weeks either yelling at each other or ignoring each other. You two just got back on good terms. Can you really blame the girl?" I question and watch as Matt bows his head, thinking about what I have said.

Matt and I had talked about Gabby quite a bit the past couple of weeks. Matt venting about everything that was going on and the way Gabby had been ignoring him. How they'd hurt each other and how he missed her. Everything and anything that Matt needed to get off his chest, he did. Usually a few drinks were needed to get him really talking, but I had heard more than enough about the two's relationship, or lack thereof, to know that Matt wasn't handling this the way I had expected him too.

Matt had been whining about wanting her back for weeks now. He had a chance at it, and he was pissing it away and I wasn't going to let him do it.

"Look Case, I know you're hurt and upset right now that she kept it from you. I get that. You have every right to be mad and angry, or whatever else you are feeling. But that still doesn't change the fact that Dawson is pregnant and the two of you are going to be parents. I know she kept it from you, but you also got to think about it in her perspective. She was probably scared. You two weren't together, and barely on speaking terms. What do you expect? You've both been in the wrong the past few months. Just let it go. You guys love each other and you are going to be parents… Is her not telling you right away really worth another couple months of you two at each other's throats and ignoring each other?"

Casey doesn't say anything and instead takes another drink of his beer. Maybe it's the drinks he has had, maybe it's that it is now nearing 5am and he hasn't slept much, or maybe it was just that he really wasn't ready to let this go yet. He rises from the chair and starts walking to his room. "Casey!" I holler after him, really not wanting to end this conversation here.

He whirls around, sloppily, and throws his hands up in defeat. "She should've told me Kelly! She should've told me."

I hear the echo of his door through the apartment as he slams it and I sigh in frustration. I couldn't blame Matt for being upset, but I also couldn't blame Dawson for her hesitance in telling him. Maybe a month was a little extensive in waiting, but they had also not been on good terms. They were both my friends. While Matt and I were much closer, Dawson still held a special place in my heart. She was like a little sister to me. I didn't want to choose sides because really the both of them had been in the wrong, there really wasn't a fair side to choose in the matter.

What I did know was that gently nudging Matt to talk to Dawson wasn't choosing sides, it was just being a good friend, right?

Matt affectively ignores me the rest of the next day. Leaving in the afternoon and not coming home that night. Clearly what I had said the night before wasn't appreciated and I realized that Matt was going to deal with this however he wanted to deal with it, and currently my input was not wanted. Which didn't mean I wasn't going to give it.

I don't see him again until we are on shift. I come early, knowing that it is most likely where Casey has crashed and hoping that I will get a minute alone with him before everyone else shows up. When I do see him I am not surprised to see that he is nursing a hangover. He looks rougher than I had ever seen him. I walk into the bathroom and can hear him getting sick in the stalls and roll my eyes. This wasn't Matt, and I wondered how long he would keep it up for.

"I guess maybe it's a good thing you didn't come home last night. Every time Dawson pisses you off you drink and a hole gets punched in the wall. Guess you saved yourself some trouble this time." I quip and only get a groan from the stall in return.

Eventually the toilet flushes and Matt makes his way out and to the sink splashing some water in his face. "Casey, what the hell are you doing?"

"Shut up, Kelly." He grunts, popping a few ibuprofen into his mouth, clearing not in the mood.

I don't much care.

"No, I'm not gonna shut up and let you act like an idiot right now. Dawson told you she's pregnant and you're gonna be a dad. Most people would be happy about that, what the hell is your problem?" I holler, feeling myself getting angrier by the minute at the Matthew Casey before me. Someone I was not use to seeing.

His fist slams down against the counter and he whirls to around to face me. "My problem!? My problem is that she's known for a month and didn't tell me! My problem is she made me feel like an ass for everything that was going on, made me feel like it was all my fault that she was ignoring me, when she was keeping this huge secret! My problem is she is a Candidate and didn't tell any of her superiors that she was pregnant! My problem is that she became my best friend again like nothing was wrong, like she wasn't keeping this from me! My problem is she had me believing we were at a point where we could trust each other, that we could possible get our relationship back! My problem is she had so many opportunities to tell me and she didn't! That is my problem. And now my problem is that you won't leave me the hell alone about it!" He hollers. Otis walks into the room and pauses at the obvious tension in the air. Matt looks back and forth between the two of us with wild eyes before storming out of the room.

Otis looks at me in confusion, not having a clue as to what he just walked in on, I can only shake my head, trying to get my own anger at Casey, at this whole situation, out of my head right now.

Hermann

It had been a rough previous few days for me, but I was ready to come back to work and move on from the last few tough shifts. I wonder into the briefing room and can feel the tension in the air. Otis and Cruz are joking about something. Capp and Tony are talking about something or another, and Mouch is sitting patiently at one of the tables, no doubt just waiting for this to get over with so he can grab some breakfast and make his way to the couch. Mills comes in and I take a seat down beside him. Looking to one of the front tables where Brett and Dawson sat, closer than usual, whispering about something. I couldn't see Brett well, but I could see Gabby, and to be frank, -she looked like hell. She looked like she hadn't slept in days, her face was paler than usual, and her eyes were so bloodshot she would give any druggie a run for their money.

My eyes quickly move to Kelly, who come in looking pissed and flops down on the couch across the room, something obviously on his mind. It's only a few minutes later that I see Casey enter. He's looking even more pissed than Kelly, and like he has the mother of all hangovers, the scruff on his face making him look even worst for ware. What the hell had all happened since last shift?

Chief walks into the room and either doesn't take notice to any of the things that I have, or he chooses to ignore them. My mind is too busy trying to figure out what has all gone on between the rowdy bunch around me to focus on anything that has been said. The Chief walks out of the room and everyone is up soon after. I watch Gabby closely, my worry for her taking over. She walked carefully, as if even the act of walking was too much for her. I share a look with Mills as we walk into the common room. Gabby has headed behind the counter to start on breakfast, her usual task as Candidate. Mills must have taken notice of Gabby's demeanor as well and my silent nod towards her is enough for him to understand what I'm trying to say. I watch Mills pull the pans from Gabby's hands and usher for her to go sit down. When she doesn't protest, I really know something is wrong.

I watch Casey walk into the room for moment before quickly leaving, Gabby's eyes following him the whole way. I don't hesitate before walking over to her, pulling her to the locker room for a much needed talk. She follows me in silence and once she is sat down on the bench I take a seat across from her. "Dawson what's going on?"

She looks around and I can see tears building in her eyes. This isn't the feisty Dawson I am use to. That Dawson rarely, if ever, let anyone see her cry. "I told him…" She tells me softly. "He, uh… He walked out. I, I haven't been able to get a hold of him sense… He, uh, he ignores my calls." Her voice is devoid of any emotion and I know it is her way of trying to keep the tears lingering in her eyes at bay.

I shake my head, not even sure what to say. This was all one big mess. I knew Casey wouldn't take the news well. I just didn't know he would take it like this. Before either of us can say more Truck 81 is called off to a small car accident. Although I know Casey knows about the pregnancy now, I'm grateful when he doesn't give Dawson much of a job at all. Keeping her on the sidelines. He may be upset but at least he could tell as well as I, and anyone else around, that Dawson wasn't looking well.

On the way back from the call I'm sat in between Dawson and Otis and when Dawson leans down resting her head in her hands I softly ask her if she is okay. She mumbles back, nauseous, and Casey meets my eyes through the mirror. His eyes on Dawson and me. He was definitely still mad, but there was no denying the concern in his eyes for the brunette beside me.

I find myself entering the locker room just as Casey is about to leave. He walks past me for a moment before turning back around, coming to stand beside me as I dig for something in my locker.

"You knew, didn't you?" He questions, I look at him confused for a moment before realization sets in and I look away, not proud of keeping it from him. "That's why you were second guessing me on calls… making sure Dawson was on your hip?" He realizes quickly.

I can only nod. "I wanted to make sure she was safe." I admit.

He shakes his head, his voice low. "You should've told me Hermann..."

I nod again, "I know, I know. But I made her a promise. She deserved sometime to do it on her own. If she wouldn't have I would've told you."

His resolve softens now. "I saw you talking to her… How is she?"

"You need to talk to her Casey," is all I tell him. Still a little angry after learning that he had walked out on Dawson. I'm trying not to pick sides, but seeing the state Dawson is in today isn't helping me jump onto 'Team Casey' right now.

He shakes his head. "I just can't right now, okay? I know, I need too. I just know if I do, I'm going to say things I don't mean, things she doesn't want to hear. I'm too…" He lets out a heavy sigh, and I find myself feeling bad for him now. He wasn't ignoring Dawson to hurt her, he was ignoring her so he didn't hurt her. Under all the anger he was feeling he was really just looking out for her, I could respect that. Even if I didn't completely agree with it.

Casey

Somehow Dawson and I manage to avoid each other the rest of the shift, not that I should be surprised, we had become pros at it the past couple of months.

I'm still so angry… at her, at the situation, but I think mostly at myself. I spend the past month wishing Gabby would talk to me, watching her, and hoping she would forgive me. I don't know how I missed the signs. Now everything seemed so clear the more I thought about it. She had days were she felt terrible and like she hadn't gotten much sleep, -morning sickness. Every time I saw her she was wearing loose fitting clothes, -baby bump. Her and Hermann getting closer, protecting her on calls… It all seemed so clear to me now, and I was kicking myself for not realizing any of it. Severide's words from the other night ringing in my head about how Gabby had known a month, and a month ago I had slept with Beth. I found myself wondering exactly when Gabby found out, but also not wanting to know.

I couldn't explain the anger I was feeling, and I couldn't explain exactly what, or who, it was directed at either.

I find myself in a similar position at the kitchen table nursing my fifth beer. I'm not drunk, but I am feeling the buzz. I hear a knock at the door and I don't even bother to get up. Hoping whoever it is will just leave. I'm not in the mood for a social call. The knocking is persistent and soon I hear the voice of the woman who has consumed my every thought filling my ears. "Dammit, Casey, I know you're home." I hear her grumble, and really don't bother getting up now.

We needed to talk, but would that talk be tonight? Not if I had anything to do about it. She knocks a couple more times and then I hear her keys jingle and think maybe she has gotten the hint.

That is until I hear the lock click and the door close behind her and her shoes pad across the wooden floor. I hear her stop a few feet behind me, but I don't move as I mutter. "Should've changed the locks."

She scoffs. "Guess you should've."

I shake my head, still not turning to face her. Any forgiveness I had in me melting away and anger replacing it again. "What are you doing here, Dawson?"

"We need to talk."

It's my turn to scoff. "I vaguely remember saying that multiple times over the past few weeks… Wasn't a good time for you than. Not a good time for me now."

I hear her scuff again and her arms motioning about. "Yeah, looks like you are real busy here with Jim, Jack, and Jose." She quips, all sass. I find myself quickly realizing that I hadn't heard her talk to me like this in a long time. This boldly. I missed it.

"You know, from what I remember you broke up with me, you packed your things, and you moved out of this apartment. So why are you back?" I know my words are harsh, and probably ruder then what she deserves right now, especially since we had already talked about this, were supposed to have moved past it.

Her silence lets me know that my words have stung her and I find myself feeling bad about that, but a small part of me is happy that she is feeling some pain, the pain I've been feeling for a while now.

"Matt…" She whispers and I can hear the lump in her throat and the tears in her eyes without turning around to see them.

I don't say anything, not even sure what to say to her right now. I can tell her resolve is weakening, that the sassiness that she walked in here with is leaving her and I'm not sure if I'm equipped to handle a heart broken Gabriella Dawson right now. Her next words let me know she's tired, tired of putting up a fight. Tired of it all…

"I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry." I listen as she take a deep breath, but I know nothing is going to make the rest of this conversation easier and she just has to rip the band aid off and do it. "I'm sorry we aren't together, I'm sorry I left, and I'm sorry that I lied to you. That I kept this from you. I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I'm sorry… And you have every right to be mad, and angry at me… You have every right to feel that way Matt… But I, I can't keep doing this. I can't keep playing this game with you… I'm stressed and I'm a mess… and I just need to know if you are in this with me or not… Things can't stay this way… The fighting and the ignoring and everything. We need to be adults about this, about us… We, Matt, we're gonna be parents in a few months… I..." Her voice trails off and I know she has stop to wipe the tears that have trailed down her cheeks and made her voice turn raspier with every word she has said. I say nothing, and I can't bring myself to turn around and face her, to turn around and see the sad look on her face that I knew would be there.

"We're gonna be parents Matt… and you can hate me for keeping this from you, but that doesn't change that. And I, I'm happy about this. Whether you are or not, I, I am, and I just really wish you could be happy with me about this…" Her voice trails off again and I can feel the tears stinging my eyes but I'm still rooted to my spot, unable to move or say anything, I hear her sniffle behind me and all I really want to do is take her into my arms and take the pain away… but I don't and silence fills the room until Gabby starts talking again, her voice low and holding a strength I knew she wasn't feeling. The fact that I knew all this without even looking at her spoke volumes.

"Matt I don't want to do this anymore, I can't do this anymore… I don't want to do this alone… But I'm not going to force you to be a part of my life… or to be a part of this baby's life. I, I… I just need to know, whether you want to do this with me, or not… I need to know whether you can forgive me…" I can hear the shake in her voice and if her words weren't enough to turn me around that sure was.

I open my mouth to speak but no words come out as I take in her appearance for the first time since she has showed up. Her hair is down in its natural wild curls that I loved, and knew that Gabby rarely wore out of the house. Her face was clear of any makeup, but full of tears and red marks from where I was sure she had wiped the salty wetness away. But the thing that was really freezing me to my place was the swell of her usually flat stomach through her tight sweater.

I can't take my eyes off her. This all hitting me and becoming so real. How had I not seen it before? How had I missed the signs?

I watch the tears rush down Gabby's face as she starts to speak again with a shaky voice, my silence finally too much for her, giving her an answer that I didn't mean. "I'm gonna go." She's half way out the door when I finally find my voice, but the only thing I can manage to utter is her name.

"Gabby…"

She turns back to me and shakes her head, her voice still full of tears. "I have an appointment after shift tomorrow… If you want to be a part of this babies life than come… And if you don't show… I, I guess I'll have my answer…"

The lock clicking into place is enough to bring the tears that have welled in my eyes down my face and the easiest realization to fill my mind.

I forgave her.

I wanted to be a part of my baby's life… of course I did.

I just hoped I wasn't too late.

Whoa, hope you enjoyed this one! Next update will be up this week, your sweet reviews will convince me of when to add it… *hint hint* ;)

Thank you too all the ones that reviewed the last chapter, you are my sunshine's!

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