A/N: So, I want to thank you all for reading and reviewing. I ask you for 10 reviews, you give me 21, WAW! So, thanks! So, this is the longest chapter yet and keep reviewing and they'll keep getting longer :) So, Bella has encounter with a few Cullens today. I hope you enjoy.

Chapter 5: Green-Eyed Angel

I woke up at 5:30, screaming at the top of my longues - the nightmare was the same, only worse, because this time Renée was helping Phill instead of just watching - and Charlie came rushing in, his gun in his hands, looking around my room, frantic. I'd forgotten to tell him about the nightmares, so he probably thought I was under attack or something.

"Bella? What happened?! Are you okay?!" He asked, he wasn't one to show his emotions, nor was I, but it clearly showed how much he cared for me and my safety in that moment and I knew right then and there that he was different than Phill, he wouldn't hurt me.

"I-I'm fine, Ch- dad, really, just a bad dream. I've been having them since mom died," I said, telling the truth, but also implying that I was getting them because I missed her or something - he'd be so angry if he knew what they were about.

"O-oh, I see. I'll, er, just leave you to it then. I'll be leaving in an hour, so I'll be gone by the time you get up. I'll be home around 6, okay?" He asked, I nodded. He turned to leave, but stopped at the door.

"Call me if you need anything. And, Bella, I'm glad you're here," He said, I felt tears coming as I thought of how much my being here seemed to mean to him and how close I was to abandoning him by hurting myself, even though I promised myself not to, for him.

"Me too," I replied, though I had no happyness in me what-so-ever. But now I really understood the impact it would have on him if I were to do something, so I made up my mind to not even think about it anymore. No suicide thoughts, ever again! I just hoped that I would be able to do the same for the thoughts about the cutting, because the craving was back, worse than ever.

He nodded and left my room, presumably thinking I would go back to sleep for another hour or so, but I wouldn't. I sighed, got up and headed to the bathroom to take a quick shower.

Once under the water, I felt my muscles relax once more as they always did when I showered, meanwhile, I tried my best to stop myself from grabbing the razor and just cutting some part, any part, of my skin. The cuts I already had looked a little nasty, as if they were starting to get infected, I would have to take care of them. Besides those cuts, almost my entire body was still covered in bruises. Some were fading into nothingness, but others were still very visible - it would take weeks, if not longer, for all of them to fade. Yet, somehow, I hardly cared.

That was my attitude now, not caring, about anything, not feeling. Because, when I did care, or did feel, everything was so much worse and I would wish for death to come. Not by my own hand, no, I wouldn't wish for that anymore, but by someone else's hands, or by an accident, if I were lucky. It was futile to wish for that, life hated me too much to grant me some sort of freedom. I may be free of Phill for the rest of my life, but I would never, ever, be free of my own mind. That was impossible.

I stayed in the shower for over an hour, I was going to get out sooner, but I felt the need to use the razor again, so I stayed where I was, until I was sure I had it under control. It was the only thing I could control now, and I would do everything I had to keep that control mine, and not the razor's.

Charlie had left by the time I got downstairs to eat breakfast - which wasn't much, just a granola bar - and I was glad to be alone, it was easier because I didn't have to act then. It was so tiresome to keep up a happy front before everyone, and honestly, I don't think I was fooling Charlie. Though, now I had an excuse as to why I was feeling next to nothing - Renée's death would be enough reason to do that to me, if it weren't for the fact I had been feeling the same since I was little. Though, it did get worse because of her death, so it wasn't a complete lie when I used her death as an excuse.

***

I arrived at the school in my old, red, Chevy truck - it was so loud I attracted a lot of unwanted attention to myself - and parked next to a shiny, silver Volvo which looked oddly out of place between all the other old, beat-up cars. Or maybe it was the car of some visitor or something, some hot-shot from the city, it'd make sense as I didn't see any of the students likely to drive such a car.

I got out, stumbling a little, almost falling - I was such a cluts - and walked over to the administrations office, keeping my eyes to the ground all the time. I didn't want to make friends here, I didn't want to be noticed - I hoped if I avoided people enough, they would catch on and leave me alone, because I had the feeling they would be herassing me all day. It would be only natural, since I was the new girl in town, of course they'd be curious.

I got my schedule and a map of the school from this woman called Mrs. Cope - I didn't like her much, she seemed too nosy to be likable - and was told to have all my teachers sign a slip of paper she gave me and bring and back to her by the end of the day. I was kind of annoyed with that; I had been hoping to go home as soon as the last bell rang and now that chance was out of the window.

I thought it was weird, the way my emotions seemed to be on a roller coaster ride ever since I arrived here- one minute I was completely numb, the other I was angry or scared or disgusted or anything really. The only emotion I didn't really seem to feel anymore was sadness, that one was lost to me. The only emotion that allowed me to cry was lost to me ever since the day Renée died. I wished I could go back to that state of feeling nothing at all I was in when I arrived at the airport the other day, but no, that nothingness was gone.

For example, a minute ago I was annoyed with that Cope woman, now I was scared to death of the day I had to face. I was afraid of the men in this school - would I have to sit with one of them? God, I hope not. I was afraid someone would hurt me or want to become friends with me. I was afraid they would never leave me alone in such a small town, but I hoped they would.

I headed off to my first class of the day - Spanish (A/N; I know nothing about the american school system, so go allong with whatver I write, okay? Thanks) - my eyes glued to the ground, desperately trying to block out the whispers I was hearing about the new girl, to no avail, I heard most of it.

"I heard she killed her mother and stepfather when she was little and was released from the crazy bin a few weeks ago," a girl's voice spoke - I rolled my eyes, so this is what it would be like? Goody! This just couldn't get better, could it?

"I heard she was send here because she had a drug addiction and slept around for money," a male voice spoke, making me want to throw up where I was walking. Oh yeah, I sure did sleep around a lot! Ugh!

"Leave her alone, her mom and stepdad died in a car accident, she must be really sad right now," a soft, sweet, female voice spoke up for me, shutting the other two up. Not that it was of much use, I heard the same gossip all the way to my class. I didn't really care what they thought, I hoped they thought I was a freak so they'd leave me be, but it was somewhat annoying.

During Spanish - which was given by a male teacher who looked to much like Phillf or my likings - I was seated next to a girl named Angela Weber. She was friendly, and I recognized her voice as the one of the girl that defended me in the hallway earlier. She seemed to sense I wasn't much into talking, because after introducing herself, she mostly left me alone, I was grateful for that. In any other reality, she and I would have probably been good friends, but not here, not now.

Spanish was followed by Calculus, which would one day be the death of me - I didn't pay any atttention, of course. Who cared if I failed all my classes? I didn't. Maybe I'd flunk out this year and wouldn't have to endure my senior year next year, I would appreciate that. I sat alone during Calculus, thank god. No one spoke to me, but many spoke of me as if I weren't in the room and kept sneaking glances at me. I payed them to attention.

After Calculus, I walked straight to my English class - the one class I would pass even if I didn't pay attention, because I read so much more than most people - and was glad to see I had a female teacher for that one. She seemed nice enough; she had long, caramel colored hair, was about 5'6", with a heart-shaped face. She was small, slender, but with the apropriate roundings. She had these beautiful deep, green, emerald eyes like I had never seen before. I walked up to her desk.

"Oh, hello, you must me Isabella Swan," she said as she saw me approach her, I cringed at the name Isabella. I had heard it too many times before - it made it harder to keep the bad memories out.

"Bella," I corrected, she nodded.

"Well, Bella, I'm Mrs. Cullen. I'll be your english teacher for the year, obviously, and am here to help you with anything." I nodded upon hearing this, she was nice.

"Also, all the teaching staff has been informed of what happened back in Phoenix, and if you need someone to talk to, I'm always here," she informed me, I nodded and thanked here. By this time the other students had begun to arrive and I asked where I was to be seated.

"You can take the empty seat next to Mike," she said, pointing at a baby-faced, pale blond, blue eyed boy. I swallowed the lump in my throat as I stared at the boy, who stared back with a lustfull look in his eyes, though he tried to hide it. Maybe other girls wouldn't notice that look, but I did, I had seen it too many times before.

I was 15 and alone in the house with Phill - Renée had gone to a busines dinner tonight. He stalked towards me and I could see the lust in his eyes, his need for something I never wanted to give him, but something he always took no mather how hard I fought. I hated that look, it made me sick to my stomach...

I felt a cool, yet warm hand on my hand, which pulled me out of my horrible memory. I quickly yanked my hand away, as if I were afraid to get a disease or something. That wasn't it though, I just hated when people touched me. I turned around to find a very distressed looking Mrs. Cullen staring at me, clearly concerned.

"Are you alright, Bella?" She asked, which made me notice for the first time how badly I was shaking. Was I alright? No! Not by a long shot! I couldn't sit next to that boy, I simply couldn't.

"I, er, don't feel very well. May I have a bathroom pass, please?" I asked in a slightly shaky voice. I needed to get out of here, I needed room to breath, room I wasn't getting here since my breathing was getting more irratic every second.

"S-sure. Here you go," she said, a little confused by this whole scene, and handed me a piece of paper which allowed me to roam the halls without anyone punishing me for not being in class. I thanked her and practically ran out of there, unaware of the entire class staring after me as if I were crazy, which maybe I was.

I ran as fast as I could to the bathroom, thought it took me a few minutes to find it. I tripped a few times along the way, but never fell, which was an accomplishment for someone like me - someone who can't even walk to feet without tripping over thin air.

I got into one of the bathroom stools, closed and locked it and just sat there, thinking. Mostly, I was thinking about how much I wished I had my razor with me now, how much I needed it. I didn't know how long I would be able to stay away from it, not if things continued to proceed like this. Those flashbacks I kept getting were slowly killing me, though I didn't know how that was possible since I was practically dead already.

I stayed in there until the bell rang; I felt no need to go back to english to sit next to Mike, no way! So, when the bell finally rang, I reluctantly left the bathroom to head to my french class - which, by the way, I hated - I hated languages. When would I ever need to use french in my entire life? Never! That's when.

The class was okay, I guess. A lot of people stared and whispered - I even heard some whispers about what happened during English - but I was in a seat by myself and the teacher pretty much left me alone, she didn't even want me to introduce myself, thank god. Another thing, why do people say 'thank god' when they don't even believe in god? I've never believed in him, and even I say it sometimes. I just found that to be weird.

And so I spend most of the class thinking about that saying - why? I had no idea, at least it was better to think about something trivial like that than something else.

Lunch came next, but I wasn't hungry and had no desire to go into a crowded lunchroom, only to be whispered about and stared at. Instead, I headed out to my truck and spend the lunch period there. I was tired, due to the lack of sleep and nightmares when I did sleep. I was thinking about my life so far, about everything, though trying to avoid thinking about the worst things, when I fell asleep.

"Hold her down, pumpkin," Phill ordered Renée and she obayed and held me down to the bed as Phill begun to strip me of my clothes, ignoring my pleas and struggles. Renée stripped out of her clothes then too and took Phill's place, holding my now naked frame in place. She was much stronger than I imagined.

Meanwhile, Phill stripped out of his clothes and took Renée's place once again. He began licking me down under as Renée began to stroke my breasts - silent tears were running down my face.

Renée then forced her tongue inside my mouth as she continued to play with my breasts and Phill continued to do whatever he was doing down there. I wanted to gag as I tasted Renée in my mouth - at least Phill was only my stepdad, it was worse with Renée because she was my actual mother. It sickened me more than anything ever had.

Phill and Renée switched places after a while - he started out with forcing kissing on me, but soon decided to move to the bigger leages. He forced his manlyhood - which I desperately wanted to cut off - down my throat, actually making me gag, and moved my head up and down. He came in my mouth and forced me to swallow, I whimpered and he and Renée laughed at me.

After that, Renée stopped what she was doing, put her clothes back on and kissed me goodnight.

"Have fun, honey," She said, to me or Phill, I wasn't sure, but it was disgusting either way. Phill smirked, then, very sudden and unexpected, entered me with more force than ever. It hurt so badly I screamed out, loudly!

Someone was shaking me as I was screaming, still stuck in my nightmare. My eyes popped wide open and the screaming abruptly stopped. I found myself staring into a pair of green, emerald, eyes I had seen once before today. Mrs. Cullen from English had the same unusual color of eyes, but this was not her. This was not even a woman. Before me, still holding onto my shoulders without any force, stood a green-eyed, bronze-haired, teenage angel.

I moved away from his touch, unafraid, but shocked. I was shocked because I wasn't afraid that a man, well, boy technically, was touching me and shocked because of what I felt when he had touched me. It was like there was their weird surge of electrical energy coursing through my vains. It was unlike anything I've ever felt before.

"A-are you okay?" He asked me, a little fear and uncertainty in his voice. I said nothing, I did nothing, I just continued to stare at him, shocked.

"Bella?" He asked, wary. This shocked me out of my shock - how did he know my name? Okay, the entire town probably knew my name, but no one knew to call me Bella.

"H-how do y-you know my n-n-name?" I stammered, unsuccesful at maintaining a steady voice.

"My mom told me - you met her during English, Mrs. Cullen," He replied. Oh, that made sense.

"Are you okay?" He asked again. "You were screaming," he continued.

"I-I fel asleep, bad dream," I responded too quickly - worst dream ever would be a better wording for my nightmare which came straight from the pits of the hell I hoped fuck-face was in now.

"Oh, well, I'm Edward," He introduced himself, holding out his hand a little - I was pretty close to him. It was weird how comfortable I felt with a male so close, but still, I didn't take his hand. I was afraid what would happen if I did. He left his hand lingering in the air for a few minutes, before dropping it and becoming uncomfortable.

"We should probably head to class - we have bio together. Mr. Banner send me looking for you when I heard the screams," He said, still uncomfortable. I nodded, got out of the truck and walked beside Edward to Bio. He said nothing more to me and I nothing more to him.

Once we reached the class, Edward knocked, opened the door, went inside with me on his trail. The teacher, who I assumed was Mr. Banner, looked up from behind his desk. He looked at me with a wary expression - did I look so terrible? - then looked over to Edward and nodded.

"Care to tell me why you're late, Ms. Swan?" He asked as I stood beside Edward, who didn't go to his desk yet. What was I supposed to say now? 'Oh, well, see, the thing is my stepdad raped me for 7 years in a row and now I keep having nightmares about it. And I just fell asleep during lunch and Edward here woke me up 'cause I was screaming at the top of my longues.' Yeah, he'd really believe that, so, instead, I said nothing.

"She had fallen down and cleaned herself up before coming to class," Edward answered for me - why would he do that? I shot him a grateful glance, he smiled, and went to his desk. Mr. Banner signed my paper, told me to be on time next time, and pointed out my seat. Right next to none other than Edward Cullen. I didn't panick as I did with that kid from english who's name I'd forgotten, I only felt nervous.

I sat down and scooted my chair as far away from him as possible, not meeting his stare - he probably thought I was insane or something. If he didn't think so before, he definitely did now.

Mr. Banner seemed in no mood to teach today, so instead he played a movie - I didn't follow a thing of it. As the lights turned down and we were covered with darkness, I became even more aware of the god-like angel sitting next to me. Wait! What?! God-like?! Angel?! Where the hell were these thoughts coming from? I shied away from all male populations, even most female, so why didn't I feel the urge to shy away from him, then? It made no sense at all.

And that strange electrical surge was back, I felt it all through the movie. I was gripping the table so hard it hurt my knuckles, though I had no idea why. If this was just another one of my weird up and down emotional roller coaster, then I hoped it would go away soon. Or didn't I? It wasn't exactly an unpleasant feeling, I had to admit.

As soon as the bell rung, I was the first one out of the room. It felt good to be able to think clearly again without Edward Cullen sitting next to me, clouding my thoughts. I came up with a rational explination to what happened in there: I was simply grateful that he had pulled me out of that awful nightmare before it went any further, that was all.

My final two classes were spend thinking about Edward Cullen - I couldn't get him or the weird feeling out of my mind, though I had come up with a rational explination, it was uncanning. The hours past faster than I would have imagined and I bolted out of there as soon as the final bell rang - completely forgetting I was supposed to go to Mrs. Cope first.

I got into my truck and raced home - well, not racing exactly because the truck didn't go over 50, or I didn't want to risk killing it by going over 50, I actually did like it. The silver Volvo from school raced past me as I was driving - whoever was driving was acting like an idiot, he or she could get himself killed. I wondered if Phill drove so fast with the entintion of getting into an accident and killing both him and Renée or if it really was an accident.

Great, now my thoughts were back to Phill! It was going to be a long night!

***

'You drain me dry and make me wonder why I'm even here
This double vision I was seeing is finally clear
You want to stay but you know very well I want you gone
Not fit to funkin' tread the ground here I'm walking on'

Harder To Breathe by Maroon 5

***

A/N: Thank you all for reading and I hope you review! I'm aiming for 100 reviews. You know the drill:

5 reviews: short chapter

10 reviews: normal chapter

15 reviews: long chapter

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Oh, and I have a new story called Concrete Angel and if you like this story, then you'll probably like that one too, so check it out if you want, it's on my account.

Summary: 10 year olds Edward and Bella are best friends. But Bella lives in an abusive home and Edward knows, but is sworn to secrecy. When he moves, he never forgets about her. What will happen when their paths cross 7 years later?

Preview:

"If you don't, I'll kill you," She finished in a whisper before stalking away, leaving me standing there in the middle off the hall, dumbfounded. I was vagely aware of a course of whispers breaking out, probably from people who had witnessed our little encounter, but I didn't care. All I could think of now was how my life was crumbling down as I watched the one person I had longed to see again for so long, walk away from me.