AN: I love you all, my loyal readers, your reviews are wonderful! In this chapter, we hear Gwen pour her woes out to the person (or creature) in Camelot, who, after Uther and Morgana, hates her the most...
Dear Dragony Aunt,
I have a problem that's been weighing me down for quite some time... men. Once I got over my minor crush on Merlin, and setting aside the time Gwaine stalked me, and then after my brief thing with Lancelot, I finally settled down with my gorgeous, handsome, funny, brave, incredibly fit husband, King Arthur. But lately, some things about him have been getting to me. Whenever Merlin goes missing, Arthur rides off immediately, ready to rescue him. I on the other hand, well, just because I got a little... soft around Lancelot, the night before Arthur and I were supposed to get married, he banished me from Camelot, and then led a hunt when his new fiancée shot me in the leg since Morgana turned me into a deer. He tells Merlin all his little secrets, takes him everywhere, even "does poetry," with him according to Leon. What do I do to make him notice me?
Queen Guinevere xxxx
Oh Gwen,
Can't you see, he's just not that into you! Why would he be? He's the king of Camelot, he has a rich and cultivated destiny ahead of him, and Merlin is the heads to his tails! They belong together, and if you can't see that, you really are as stupid as you look! here's my suggestion to you: LEAVE MERLIN AND ARTHUR ALONE! Without you they can be happy, and ride off into the sunset together etc. etc. You run along back to Lancelot, and keep him away from Merlin and do whatever you need to do! Actually, no, wait... (note to self, save Lancelot for Leon), why don't you go seek out your BFF Morgana? I mean, she may be slightly changed since you last knew her, but you certainly had the chemistry! Now off you toddle.
Good riddance,
Dragony Aunt