The Heart Knows

Chapter 6

"That's it. What's going on?" Alice hissed in my ear, annoyed. I was supposed to be focusing on the finer intricacies of game-play. Today was backgammon – highlighting the lady-like ways to roll dice and move pieces, not anything about strategy of course. Alice and I usually managed to sneak in an actual competitive game among the frivolous teaching, but I had been lost in my own thoughts allowing her an easy victory. They kept returning to the mysterious man from the courtyard.

"What?" I whispered back.

"You're going to tell me. It's just a matter of time, so you might as well give it up now." She threatened me too loudly. We were shushed by the teacher- a fourth year initiate. The assistant mistress presiding over the class looked at us threateningly but didn't make any other move. Alice was forced to return her attentions to the class, but she threw me a look that promised further interrogation.

I took the temporary reprieve as an opportunity to try and figure it out myself. How did she know anything was going on? Was it that obvious that my thoughts were obsessed with him? And most importantly, what on earth could I tell her? It made absolutely no sense for me to develop interest in any man. It would only bring me heartache. And I didn't even know his name. I was such an idiot. What was I doing even thinking about him? I should be focused on not getting into more trouble with Jane. I definitely should not be thinking about cavorting with a mysteriously handsome, infuriatingly self-assured stranger.

I hadn't come to any conclusions about how to avoid the inquisition by the time the class ended and Alice was dragging me by the arm back to our room.

"What makes you think anything is going on?" I asked in an obvious attempt at stalling.

She just raised an eyebrow at me. It was an effective look, I felt guilty right away. "Are you kidding me? Your head's been stuck in the clouds for days. You're smiling to yourself at random times. Clearly, something is going on." I sighed in defeat, and her entire face lit up with her easy victory.

"Fine. I'll tell you, but you can't buy me anything for a month." Her face fell.

"One week," she countered.

"Three."

"Two."

"Fine, two weeks. No more perfumes, trinkets, stockings, earrings -and definitely no more dresses. Nothing. Got it?" It was best to take what I could get. She would no doubt get the information from me either way. I had to be very specific with Alice. She was sneaky, that one.

"Deal. Now spill."

"I don't know." I sighed, exasperated.

"Bell-luh. You just promised!" She pulled out the puppy dog eyes. She must really want to know.

"No, I mean …I don't know. I don't even know his name." I hid my face in my hands. There was no way she was going to miss that. Her gasp confirmed my fears.

Alice was unnaturally quiet. I peeked through my fingers to see her face. She was absolutely speechless staring at me with wide eyes. We were suddenly both very serious.

"Tell me everything," she breathed.

So I told her everything. From our first encounter, his beastly dog and the way his hair glinted bronze in the sun to every detail I could recall of our verbal banter. I told her about his crooked smile and the way my stomach felt when he made me promise to meet him again. I told her about my uncertainty, but how it physically hurt to think about not seeing him again. I was surprised to realize that I had only seen him twice. There seemed to be so much that had already happened.

Alice listened without interrupting. It might have been the first time that had ever happened. Her face didn't give away anything she was thinking. It was deadly serious and carefully blank. I finally ran out of words and waited for her response.

"Is that everything?" she finally asked.

"I think so." I bit my lip.

"Okay." She got up and started walking for the door.

"What? Where are you going? What do you mean, 'okay'?"

"I mean okay. I'm okay with this." I stared at her in astonishment. She was supposed to tell me what a bad idea this was, how I was being stupid. She should tell me never to see him again. I told her as much.

She let out a longsuffering sigh. "Look. Obviously this was meant to be. I know it." And then she smiled. I stared at her in shock, completely speechless. "Just. Be careful, okay? I know this will work out, but it's risky."

In a rare display from Emotional Bella, I grabbed her up into a hug. "Thank you, Alice."

"I want a name next week. 'Beautiful, Bronze Haired God' doesn't really give me much to go by." The humor was back again. We shared a mischievous smile.

"I know, I know. I'm such an idiot."

"You really are," she agreed with a laugh. I felt a huge weight lift of my shoulders. I knew it was silly, Alice couldn't guarantee the future, but it all felt right with her blessing.

We headed off together to a special class that had been added just that morning. We were carefree and giddy. I walked happily into the classroom. No one in our year knew what the special class was about. It was all very secretive and naturally made for a lot of speculation among the girls.

We entered into the class room to see Mistress Janelle preparing for the lesson. Seeing that she was teaching, I knew then that we were probably not going to enjoy whatever was in store. Nothing involving Jane was ever pain free. Especially for me. She always seemed to want to make an example of me.

She gave an introduction talking about the duties of our station and our obligation to please our future matches. I didn't understand what she was leading into until she brought in the object lesson. A man entered wearing only a dressing robe. He didn't seem to be embarrassed at all. If anything, he seemed pleased to have the surprised and undivided attention of our entire class. To our shock, Jane asked him to disrobe which he did readily.

I had not seen a naked, adult man before and I was very surprised at this turn of events. Jane proceeded to detail the man's body, giving the names of different body parts. Thankfully, the descriptions were all technical, scientific. I was staring at a naked, fully excited man and I was getting used to it. It was shocking, but perhaps her desensitization method was not too bad.

Then she brought in the other half of her object lesson. A woman approximately our age was brought in also wearing only a robe. Jane instructed as the woman demonstrate the various ways to please a man. Our class sat in shocked and uncomfortable silence. The reality of our time here came clearly into focus as we were forced to watch the perverse actions in front of us. I learned more than I ever wanted to know. Mine was not the only pale face in the room. After several different demonstrations of an extremely intimate nature, Jane instructed the woman to disrobe. We watched, most of us in a shocked silence, as they had sex in front of us. The woman mostly ignored her audience, but the man was all leering smiles during the process. I felt sick to my stomach. Jane closed with some words about the reputation of the House and our duties. I'm sure most of us were too numb to even hear her speaking.

Finally we were released from the class, silent and overwhelmed. By some unspoken mutual agreement, neither Alice nor I spoke of it afterward. It was a life altering experience that we would forever share.

Authors Note: Okay, so it's been a while. I got a bit discouraged when no one commented on the previous chapters, but I still want to continue. Hopefully at some point other people will start to like this story too. I'm posting three chapters tonight to make up for my absence…