Hello, I'm back! I've rewritten my first ever one-shot for Game of Thrones! The story's light and funny as I wanted it to be.

I DON'T OWN ANYTHING! IT ALL BELONGS TO BRILLIANT GEORGE R.R. MARTIN!

"Stop texting her Robb!" Jon spat angrily and Robb jumped in surprise, even Jon's dog Ghost, a Siberian Husky, lifted his head, his keen sky-blue eyes followed his master's movements. The boys sat in Jon's room, simply enjoying their holidays. They just had come back from the pub 'Night's Watch', where they'd met with Theon, Grenn, Pypar, Sam and Ed.

Jon got up from his bed and lunged at his cousin, trying to whip Robb's mobile off his hand.

"Why!?" Asked Robb, a smirk appeared on his face, even if Jon's weight pressed into his ribs painfully. Robb Stark's flip attitude irritated Jon Targaryen even more so.

"Because she's my aunt!" Jon's grey eyes glared at Robb, who simply laughed at his cousin.

"Very hot aunt." Robb thrust Jon away and wiggled his eyebrows. Jon looked like he was about to be sick. Robb added. "Besides, Daenerys is one year younger than us! And I can date whomever I want."

"Of course you can, Robb. But why it has to be Daenerys?!" Jon asked helplessly, running his fingers through his curly brown hair. Robb rolled his grey eyes and sighed deeply.

"Hmm, let's see. She's hot and pretty," He started counting her advantages on his fingers. "I like her violet eyes too. Dany has plump mouth which tastes like strawberries. She likes strawberry lip balms if you wonder."

Jon paled a little and started petting Ghost, trying to ignore his cousin. Robb looked really amused by the situation.

"Okey I think I've heard enough." Jon shook his head. "You know what? You can date her, but never speak of her like that again in front of me, dickhead." He made a face and Robb scowled.

"As if I was asking for your permission to date her, jerk." He said and then added. "You know who's your sister dating?"

"What!" Jon exclaimed so loudly that Robb and even Ghost startled a bit. "She's barely seventeen!"

"Easy, Jon. The guy's alright." Robb said calmly. "It's Jory Cassel."

"I must talk with her and bring her to her senses, for fuck's sake! He's older about five years than her! If not more!" Jon said firmly and Robb couldn't hold it anymore and burst out laughing. His rich laugh sounded in his cousin's room.

"What's so funny, boys?" Jon's mother and Robb's aunt, Lyanna came into the room holding a laundry basket. Jon sat there scowling while Robb now was grinning from ear to ear.

Jon inherited his grey eyes and curly brown hair from his mother, but his features were more his father's now. As to his younger sister Rhaenys, she had silver-gold hair and indigo eyes, but her bone structures were her mother's.

Everyone thought that the three of them, including ten years old Naelle were perfect combination of their parents. Naelle inherited brown hair and features from her mother's side, while her eyes were a Targaryen violet just like grandma Rhaella had.

Only fourteen years old twins, Aegon and Aemon were the living image of their father Rhaegar.

"Did you know that Rhaenys has a boyfriend, mom!" Jon stood up from the couch and crossed his arms. Robb was quite astonished by his cousin's tone.

Jon was always overprotective of Rhaenys and treated her like she was only seven years old. He hated every guy who hit on his sister and Jon intimidated every one of them. Later poor boys were scared to death to even take Rhaenys to the cinema.

Robb Stark was used to his sister Sansa's boyfriend, he liked the guy, and when it was about Arya, he needn't have to worry, his youngest sister was such a tomboy, boys sometimes were afraid of messing with her.

"I know, Jon and don't be surprised." Lyanna smiled and collected Jon's dirty clothes. "Your sister is very beautiful."

"But she's seventeen! Rhae is too young for God's sake!" Jon protested. His mother looked at him, her grey eyes sparkling with amusement.

"Don't be silly Jon. It's only her second boyfriend thanks to you. She can take care of herself. And weren't you younger when you'd dated your second girlfriend?" Lyanna Targaryen teased him, winking at amused Robb, who grinned in return. He liked his aunt and wasn't surprised that his mother was getting along with her.

"It was different, mom!" Jon's cheeks reddened a bit and Robb laughed noiselessly.

"It was the same, sweetie." His mother shook her head. "Your behavior is ridiculous!"

"Don't call me 'sweetie'! I'm nineteen, mom!" Jon huffed and blushed from embarrassment. Robb would never let him forget this.

"And? I'm your mother, I love you and I'm gonna call you as I want." His mother furrowed her eyebrows and then turned to her nephew with a smile. "Will you stay for dinner, Robb?"

"Thank you, aunt, but no. I should get going. I promised Bran to pick him up from the training."

"And yet Aegon and Aemon convinced him to join the club." Lyanna said. Jon smiled, his younger brothers were horridly snippy and annoying when they wanted to convince you to do something, that was probably why Bran finally surrendered.

"Mom hates that Bran's in the team." Robb laughed. "She can't stand grass stains on his clothes."

"It's just the beginning. Poor Cersei." Lyanna giggled and exited the room.

Robb turned to Jon and they both went downstairs. They were almost at the door, when horrible scream pierced their ears.

"JAEHAERYS!" Jon's mother screamed ferociously, her quick steps sounded upstairs.

Both boys looked at each other in fear. Lyanna called Jon his full name only in the serious cases.

"Oh fuck." Jon whispered, guessing what it was all about. He looked frightened at Robb.

"Oh it will be a great show!" Rhaenys ran from the living room rubbing her hands. "What did he do mom?!"

Jon glared at his younger sister who looked like Christmas came earlier. Her indigo eyes sparkled with excitement. Rhaenys loved when their mother lectured her older, stupid brother.

"WHAT DID HE DO?!" Their mother screamed while running down the stairs. "MAYBE YOU CAN EXPLAIN THIS, JAEHAERYS?!" Her angry tone scared Robb a bit, who now felt uncomfortable in his relatives' house. His father, Ned preferred a calm exchange than screaming.

His aunt held something in her hand, at which sight Robb's eyes widened and he almost burst out laughing. He quickly turned his head to look incredulously at Jon, yet he shouldn't be surprised as Jon's ex-girlfriend was Margaery Tyrell.

"OH MY GOD!" Rhaenys covered her pink mouth and started giggling madly. "IT'S A CONDOM!"

"THANK YOU FOR YOUR HELP, RHAENYS. I WOULDN'T HAVE GUESSED!" Lyanna yelled, there was a storm in her dark grey eyes.

Jon stood there dead stop, red-faced. He opened his mouth and then closed them, any good excuse wasn't coming into his mind. Even Ghost ran down the stairs to observe the show. Lyanna Targaryen was convinced that her eldest son was moral enough not to engage in such activities like... intimate relationship with girls. Sweet baby Jesus, Jon was definitely too young for that, he was only nineteen.

The front door opened and two silver-gold haired boys came into view, dropping their gym bags in the hall with a thud. The tall man closed the door behind them, clearly weary, dressed in a black suit.

"Honey, I'm…" Rhaegar Targaryen raised his eyebrows at the scene before him. "…Home?"

Well, that's awkward, Robb thought. He didn't dare to look aunt Lyanna in the eye nor uncle Rhaegar. This argument should be only between the Targaryens, not him as a witness.

"IT IS GOOD THAT YOU ARE HOME, RHAEGAR!" Lyanna exclaimed, her grey eyes burned with fury. "LOOK WHAT YOUR SON HAD IN HIS BACK POCKET!"

She extended her hand closer to him. Rhaegar's cheeks reddened a bit and he didn't know what to do.

Aegon and Aemon closed on their parents and their eyes widened comically. "IT'S A CONDOM!" The twins bursted into laughter. They had to clutch their stomachs not to pee themselves.

"Jon got laid!" Aegon roared with laugh, Aemon and Rhaenys along with him, Robb stifled his own laugh heavily.

Lyanna looked speechless at her children.

"LANGUAGE, BOYS! And aren't you too young to know what it is?!" She said, her voice squeaky. Lyanna looked between the twins, Jon and Rhaenys, obviously terrified.

"Aren't you going to say something, Rhaegar?!" Lyanna screeched at her husband, who scratched his neck in a self-conscious manner.

Rhaegar looked at his wife sheepishly. "Ekhm... That's..."

"... hilarious!" Rhaenys exclaimed laughing like a mad women. Her indigo eyes were watery.

"Mommy?" A small voice sounded from the stairs. Naelle looked confused between her parents, playing with her long, brown hair. "What is a condom?" She asked with her sweet voice, innocence visible in her violet eyes.

Oh shit! Robb thought.

Oh bloody shitty fuck! Jon grabbed hold of his curly hair.

Mom's going to kill him! F-I-N-A-L-L-Y! Rhaenys grinned, thinking positively about her brother's fate.

Everyone reddened on their faces.

Jon stood there knowing his mother was going to kill him for this situation. How stupid he was not to draw it from his back pocket when he'd come back last night from his girlfriend?! Laena Velaryon was probably the last girl Jaehaerys Targaryen had ever had.

His parents were speechless and clearly uncomfortable with the course of events.

Rhaenys was laughing her pants off.

Robb knew it was the time to escape. His mother would die from laughing when he would tell her about the whole situation. He cleared his throat and everyone looked at him.

"See you later, Jon." He nodded at his cousin. "Er, goodbye everyone?"

He gave them a sheepish smile and exited the Targaryen house. Closing the door he heard twins saying at the same time:

"I love our family."

With a big smile and shook of his head, Robb walked down the pavement of the green London suburbs, where his crazy relatives lived.

It might have been the last time he had seen his cousin, Jaehaerys Targaryen.