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Modern Romance

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"Did they wake you?" he asks quietly

Rukia rubs the sleep from her eyes and squints at him. "Nanao did, though their yelling in the kitchen certainly helped."

"I assumed you were the one calling me, that's the only reason I picked up," he says, and even though she's half awake, his sheepishness is hard to miss.

As is the fact that Ichigo is practically glistening, a small puddle of water gathering in the divot of his collarbone from its trail down his neck where his hair is still dripping.

He must be at the pool, she thinks absently, before, "You know what they say about 'assume', don't you?" Yawning widely, she hugs her pillow tighter to herself with one arm while the other keeps his phone in her hand. "How'd that work out for you, though? Did my brother threaten to disembowel you and wear your intestines as a scarf?"

"He hadn't gotten to that part, no," Ichigo drawls. "I'll remember that when the twins bring someone home."

"Don't ever say I don't give you anything," she chirps, trying to curl back into a ball to escape the fingers of sunshine peeking through the blinds, groaning aloud, "I can't believe this couldn't wait."

"You and me both," he huffs.

Nuzzling into her pillow, she blinks at him. "Why so grumpy?"

"Have you met your family?"

She chuckles. "Just be glad Hisana isn't around, she's worse in a different way. Less murder, more tell-me-everything." Suffice to say, her sister-in-law was not a fan of Rukia's previous boyfriend. Then again, no one really was. "Sorry," she adds, in a wince.

"It's – it could've been worse. Although," Ichigo huffs, "it would've helped to be more prepared, don't you think? Maybe if you'd given me a head's up?"

"In my defence I didn't know they'd take my phone and call you, I don't even video call you." That really should have been Ichigo's first guess that it wasn't her calling. Then again, he was usually too relaxed after his morning cardio that Rukia swore she could get away with dragging a dead body around the house, and he wouldn't even notice.

"Sounds like we're already on the rocks, babe, say it ain't so."

"I don't need to video call you to remember what you look like, idiot," she snorts.

"But it's all part of keeping a young relationship alive," and if it weren't for his exaggeratedly wide eyes, Rukia might have done something other than smirk.

"Like we don't already talk every day?"

"Well what if I wanted to see your face?"

"You've got enough pictures of me."

Ichigo sighs dramatically. "I'm trying to be romantic here."

"It's wasted on the sleep deprived." At that, even he smiles, and shakes his head.

"How was it last night?"

Rukia shrugs, readjusting herself so she was sitting against the headboard. "We drank wine. Rangiku tried to booty call her boyfriend while he was in the States. Nanao tried to call the TA for her government class that she's been crushing on. The usual."

"And you?"

"Sorry, babe, but my first love remains and always will remain, Family Law." In fact, she'd fallen asleep reading one of the pro-bono case files her brother had handed her, in a thinly veiled attempt to keep her from ending up like Rangiku or Nanao. Not that any of the case particulars actually sunk in. Rukia was good, but even she was no match for Rangiku's famous box wine.

"You're breaking my heart, Kuchiki. Your brother will think I'm not making us worth your while."

"Why, hoping to make a good impression, babe?"

"Well you already posted the dodgiest picture of me you could get," he reminds with a roll of his eyes.

"It was artistic, I was following your lead," she defends, though not even the pillow helps to suppress her laughter.

It was probably for the best that Instagram let them access more than one account at a time. Rukia doubted she could quite pull off Ichigo's wit via his comment section, and it seemed like the easiest thing to have their own accounts back, on top of each other's.

"In my defence, you were the one who decided to expose me for walking around barefoot. I mean, I was drunk, it was an executive decision not to twist my ankle!"

Ichigo's expression is deadpan. "There could've been glass, Rukia, you could've cut yourself."

Fortunately, despite his friends' enthusiasm about a well-chosen picture of a night-out so many months ago that Rangiku hadn't remembered taking it, none of his friends had tried to call him to demand who she was. Though, it helped that Ichigo was so flippant about her, and it was just their luck that they both went home alone the night their phones got swapped.

"And yet…"

He rolls his eyes, a smile curling at his lip almost reluctantly. "I promise to carry you next time."

Before she can reply, the person lingering at his shoulder clears her throat, and Ichigo just barely manages to conceal his flinch. So, Rukia wasn't the only one who'd forgotten about her. Then, to who Rukia assumes is Inoue, Ichigo attempts to excuse himself with a curt, "I gotta go."

"Rude," Rukia informs at the same time that the girl visibly deflates. "You're not gonna introduce us, Strawberry-chan?"

He flashes the crazy eyes at her, the what-are-you-doing face, and it's a miracle she doesn't laugh before Inoue plasters herself more firmly at Ichigo's arm and introduces herself, smile blindingly bright.

Even without the backstory Ichigo gave her, Rukia's met Inoue's type before, and suffice to say, she is not a fan.

"Oh, I see," Rukia returns, smiling sweetly in return, "and how does my boyfriend know you?"

For a split second, Inoue hesitates, looks at Ichigo in askance before firmly declaring, "We've known each other a long time!"

"Really?" Rukia tilts her head in feigned surprise which she knows probably looks ridiculous considering she's in a sleep shirt that's too big and her hair is a mess. But if Hisana can terrify Byakuya-niisama with a smile, Rukia can do it too. "Well, I'm sure you know about the girl sending him overly suggestive pictures of herself on airdrop, then?"

Inoue flushes and opens her mouth wordlessly before Rukia's barrels on, sounding perfectly apologetic, "It's so embarrassing, don't you think? I'd hate to come off so desperate…anyway, Ichigo thinks it might be someone from back home and – well, since you've known him for so long – I was wondering if you had any idea who it could be?"

If it were possible, Inoue's brain would be escaping out of her ears while Ichigo's jaw hangs slightly ajar.

"N-no, no idea whatsoever," Inoue manages after several awkward seconds and then, "Erm, excuse me, Kurosaki-kun."

One beat. Two.

"Was that too harsh?" Rukia asks belatedly.

"I think," Ichigo began slowly, "I think I'm gonna keep you."