Lost at a Certain Angle

'This is outrageous!' he thought.

What exactly is this?

This means Himuro tied up in a chair, sitting in front of a wooden desk in the middle of a dark room with only a dimly-lit bulb hanging above.

Reader, as you may know, creativity when it comes to words is very important if you are a writer. Now, I can honestly say that I really, really try my best to use the right words at certain moments in my stories, and right now, these two words which you are about to read rightfully sums up everything in the atmosphere and even that of our lovely Himuro's thoughts.

Holy shit.

Yes.

I know.

"Himuro-kun."

Himuro's head snapped up and he turned his head right and left as he tried to look for the person who had just spoken. He saw no one, and chills ran up his spine.

"I am in front of you."

"SHI—! I mean, Kuroko? What the—"

"Please refrain from such language and stay calm, please."

Himuro sighed and eyed Kuroko suspiciously. In a wary tone, he asked, "So, would you please explain why I'm bound to a chair in this shady-looking room?"

Kuroko merely blinked at him and sat down on a chair he did not notice was opposite him. Himuro was also quite shocked when a lamp suddenly lit up on the table. It gave more illumination to the room and he was able to see Kuroko more clearly.

For a while nobody talked, and as seconds passed, Himuro grew more nervous and awkward. He decided to break the ice. "Uh, so, what am I here for—"

"Are you or are you not in love with Kagami-kun?"

"Huh? What are—"

"Answer the question, please."

"Why are you even—"

"Himuro-kun."

"No, I'm not."

"Good, that wasn't so bad, yes?"

"Um—"

"But were you formerly in love with him?"

"Absolutely not."

"False. The waves from the lie detector are messed up, see?"

"Wha—lie detec—!"

Sure enough, when Himuro looked down at his arm, he saw some band-thingy on his arm and it was connected to what he assumed was the lie detector.

A. Freaking. Lie. Detector.

Just when he thought he'd seen all the danger in America.

"So, Himuro-kun, answer me again, are you in love with Kagami-kun right now?"

"Look, I really don't-"

"Himuro-kun."

"No. I don't see him that way, geez."

"...So you are saying you despise Kagami-kun?"

"NO!"

"You have feelings for him, then?"

"NO! I don't! I don't have feelings for him and I don't hate him either! He's like my younger brother and that's it."

"How cheeky of you to imply that you are much closer to him than I am."

"Well, damn, Kuroko. That was not my intention."

"Oh really now, Tatsuya?"

.

.

.

"Funny how you can make my name sound so mocking with that flat voice of yours."

"Why, thank you."

"That wasn't supposed to be a compliment."

Kuroko raised an eyebrow and showed a microscopic evil smile before he said, "Well, I am deeply sorry for my wrong idea regarding your previous statement, Grape Candy."

"...You did not just call me that."

"What? Called you what, Potato Chips?"

"That."

"I will not be able to get what you wish to say if you will not phrase it more clearly, Corn Stick."

"Stop calling me using Atsushi's favorite snacks!"

"Oh, please do pardon my utter rudeness, Lollipop."

"Oh, I don't mind, Double Cheeseburger."

Kuroko's expression remained neutral and Himuro had a soft smile plastered on his face, but the dark aura radiating from the two made the already-dim room seem dimmer, the cold air around them colder.

Truly, there is nothing more terrifying than two ukes—ahem—men— who are battling it out for their pride.

This was war.

Kuroko fired the first cannon ball.

"Ah, no, it was my bad, Pringles."

"No, please, Jordan, it is I who should be sorry for being so insensitive."

"You are too kind, Chocolate."

"I could say the same to you, Maji Burger."

"No, truly, you are the humbler one, oh great Princess Bubblegum."

"Edward Cullen, you flatter me."

Himuro smirked triumphantly when he saw the usual emotionless face of the boy before him morph into a small, irritated frown.

"Please stay away from Kagami-kun."

"Atsushi is better than him, I assure you. And cuter."

"Kagami-kun is the cuter one. Murasakibara-kun is but a spoiled, oversized child."

"And Taiga is just a short-circuited fuse begging to be blown up. Between a child and a bomb, which exactly is more adorable?"

"Bombs are hot. Children? I don't think so."

"Ha! Children, when they are grown, tend to find the beast inside of them."

Kuroko could no longer answer.

Himuro grinned and sent out rays of mocking victory directly to Kuroko's face.

Kuroko glared at Himuro and said grudgingly, "You win this time."

"Good. Now, for the love of God, untie me. And where were you able to get this lie detector thing?"

"I have ways and means, Himuro-kun. Ways and means."

"Why does that line sound eerily familiar?"