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Chapter 6: Irreversible Changes

Paul POV

It was the best night of sleep I had had in my entire life.
The bed was comfy, the sheets were soft and the pillow was like air. The sunrise poked through the blinds, which only heightened my reflective mood.
The main factor of why I had a great night's sleep was mostly thanks to my wolf hearing and my wolf sense of smell. I listened to Maggie's breathing and inhaled her scent from the pillow.
It was intoxicating.
She smelt like sandalwood and the ocean. It not only burnt itself into my nostrils, but it entered my body and burnt itself to every part of me.
Her deep breaths were even and soothing. Each breath becoming deeper than the last. Every now and then she'd sigh, and goosebumps prickled on my skin.

"How long do you think he's gonna stay in there?" Collin's voice came from outside.
I leapt to the window and saw Collin, Sam and Brady standing in a huddle outside.
I sobered from my previous thoughts and silently walked out into the hallway. I glanced at one of the closed doors, my body longing to be on the other side knowing who was behind it.
Glancing away, I opened the front door and walked outside.
"I told you not to bother me tonight. I said I was busy." I said angrily. Sam turned to face me with his alpha face on, while Colin and Brady looked unsettled.
"We understand that Paul. But as I also said before you took off, we need to talk about this. About what we're going to do." Sam said sternly gesturing to the window of Maggie's room.

My anger heightened with my alpha. He made Maggie seem like a problem that had to be dealt with. Granted, it was a change, a big and irreversible one at that. But she was not a problem and she certainly was not going to be dealt with.
"There is nothing to discuss. I'm not going to tell her yet. End of story. Goodnight." I turned to leave. But Sam's strong hand was suddenly gripping my arm,
"That's not how it works Paul, and you know it. We must go through the same things with Maggie just like we did with Kim and Nessie."
"And Emily?" I challenged. I knew Sam would not react well to this. His nostrils flared and his breathing quickened. His grip tightened on my arm.
"Don't bring her into this Paul. It will not end well. I know you can't leave Maggie alone, so you will bring her to Emily's today. Where we will talk about what is going to happen from here on out. Do you understand?"

Sam's voice was quiet, yet in the silent dawn it was vicious and full of malice. I nodded accepting the order Sam gave me. I knew I couldn't avoid this talk forever. It's what every wolf had to go through when they imprinted. Sam was the only exception as none of us had phased when he had imprinted.
I hung my head low and began to walk back in the house.
"Do you reckon they did it?" I heard Brady whisper.
"He's hardly got any clothes on. Plus he's sleeping over. What do you think?" Collin chuckled.
That was all it took for the rubber band holding my anger together to snap. I used my inhuman speed and strength to grab both Collin and Brady by the throats. I slammed them against adjoining trees.
"Shut your infant mouths." I snarled. My breathing was erratic and my anger was transferred to the fear in the two boys' eyes.
"I'm sorry Paul." Collin wheezed. I tightened my grip around his throat.
"Yea man. Me to. Uncalled for." Brady choked.
I released my grip on both of them and they fell to the floor gasping.
"Why the hell didn't you stop him?" Collin gasped at Sam. I was wondering the same question myself.
"Because you idiot's deserved it." Sam chuckled, "It's Paul for God's sake. What were you expecting?"

I smiled at Sam before walking back to the house. My heartbeat was pumping at full pace and I needed to calm down. I slowly walked past Maggie's bedroom where I was sleeping and stopped in front of Alex's closed door. I quietly opened the door and cringed when it slightly squeaked. I looked over to the large bed, and smiled as my heart began to slowdown.
Maggie had not woken, even with all the commotion going on outside. She was still asleep, sprawled out on the double bed, half swallowed by a large white doona. Her face was unmoved and her hair covered half of her face. I closed the door again and walked back to where I had awoken in Maggie's room.

I felt lethargic once again as I lounged across the bed. I closed my eyes and waited for any signs of movement from the room across the hallway.

Maggie POV

I woke to the loud howl of a wolf outside the house.
My limbs felt stiff like I had not used them in months. I sat up in my bed, and looked out of my father's window to the forest. He really did have the best room. It was at the back of the house, meaning it had the most perfect view of the forest as well as the most beautiful sunsets. My room, however, had the road and a few trees, as well as the hideously bright sunrise.
My room, I thought again.
My eyes widened as I remembered the events from last night and just who was occupying my room this very moment.
I stumbled out of bed to the window. I desperately looked out past my backyard, hoping for a wolf to accompany the howl. But all I saw were trees. No wolf, no Paul.
No Paul Wolf.

I walked to the door, opening it slowly. My own bedroom door was open, but I couldn't see if Paul was still there or not. I slowly walked out to the hallway, and stopped when I came to my room. I looked around and felt my whole body slump.
The bed was empty, the window open. I felt my face droop as I realised that Paul had probably left during the night.
"Why so sad Magz?" A voice laughed from behind me.
I spun around to find Paul leaning against the wall.
"You're still here." I said, my face brightening instantly
"Of course I'm still here. Where else would I be?" He laughed.

But if Paul hadn't left, who was howling in the forest? I was beginning to get really annoyed not being able to just ask Paul. The thing that stopped me was that somewhere deep inside me, doubt played devilishly. I was afraid that if I voiced my thoughts I would be silenced.
It was best to stay quiet, even though I was subconsciously waiting for a slip up.

We walked into the kitchen and I paused for a moment, thinking about what I would have for breakfast. Obviously I would have to cook for Paul too, but I didn't mind. I considered myself a good cook.
"So I couldn't help noticing you have all the ingredients for pancakes." Paul said sheepishly.
I laughed at his not so subtle hint and began to take out the eggs, milk, flour, even the blueberries I forgot I bought.
"Just make yourself at home." I smiled and Paul returned the smile taking a seat at the little Island in the middle of the kitchen and watched me cook.
I measured out all the ingredients, but my imagination began asking me questions. What kind of food do werewolves eat? Did they like blueberry Pancakes? Exactly how much did they eat?
Judging by dinner last night, I knew Paul ate a lot very quickly.

I ended up making enough for eight people, and Paul downed three quarters of it gracefully. While I ate my portion, I was flabbergasted at Paul's pig like appetite.
"Do you always eat like that?" I asked, hoping for his answer to be applied to a different context.
He thought for a moment, "Umm, the job I do burns the calories off fast. So all the boys and I get really hungry."
I nodded taking note to stock the kitchen with tonnes of food. Maybe Paul would want to spend more of his time here if he knew i had a lot of food.
"So you work a lot?" I asked, again wanting the answer to be about his real job.
"Yea, Sam is the one who controls the roster we're at his mercy I guess." He shrugged, "What's with all the questions?"
I became nervous as his face turned serious. I knew I had overstepped the boundary from curious to suspicious. I decided to shut up.
"I just want to know more about you." I smiled, appraising myself at how blasé I sounded.
He nodded, but was now lost in a serious thought; I desperately wanted to know what he was thinking.

"Do you want to go to Emily's today? They invited us over for lunch." Paul asked after he finished his brooding. I smiled and nodded a yes, taking careful note of the way he used 'us' in his sentence. It made us sound official or something. I liked official.
Paul ushered me out of the kitchen telling me to get ready. By the time I had had a shower, gotten dressed and walked into the living room, Paul was sitting on the couch watching the latest Jeopardy re-run, the dishes currently drying in the rack.
"You didn't have to do that." I said, looking to the kitchen.
"You cook, I clean." He smiled, standing up and placing a hot hand on my waist, "Come on lets go."
It was a short drive to Emily's and I was greeted with a crushing hug from Emily.
"Thanks for coming today! I was really hoping you would. Too much testosterone these days." She laughed, taking me away from Paul. I smiled at his apologetic expression as I was dragged into he kitchen.

"Take a seat! Take a seat!" She gestured to a small table in the kitchen, "The whole pack- I mean group are coming. And they eat a buffet each, so I gotta have an early start" She sighed, wrapping an apron around her waist.
"Want me to help?" I asked. Emily eye's lit up and relief spread across her face
"Really? You want to help?"
"Sure why not." I shrugged, grabbing another apron.
"She'll love you forever you know." A booming voice entered the kitchen.
I jumped and received a laughing apology from Sam.
Paul followed in behind him, his expression conflicted but contempt. They both took a seat at the small table.
"Everyone isn't fitting into this kitchen are they?" I said hesitantly. I hated being squashed.
"No, we eat in the dining room." Emily smiled.

We spent the rest of the morning cooking and talking. I found myself becoming quickly attached to Emily. She was the most engrossing person I had ever talked to. She was cheeky, funny, sincere and incredibly bright. She balanced out Sam's serious, booming, authoritive personality perfectly.
Sometimes I would secretly glance at the two together. I noticed Sam was a completely different person with her. His face was happy and relaxed, his eyes full of love and passion. I suddenly longed to be with some one like that. I wanted to be loved the way Sam loved Emily. An arm wrapped around my waist, and my hart skipped a beat, thinking it was Paul.
"Hello gorgeous." A deep but different voice whispered.
I shrieked and suddenly the real Paul ran into the kitchen. His eyes turned from worried to amused and he suddenly began laughing. I frowned turning around finding Jacob struggling to hold his laughter. My expression darkened.
"Not funny Jake." I pouted.
"Wanted me to be someone else did you?" He smirked, looking over my shoulder. I heard Paul laughed once in the background.
"Go away." I huffed, ignoring Paul as I turned back to my cooking.
Emily walked over to give me a hand.
"Don't worry. You get use to it eventually." She reassured.

By the time Lunch came around, I realised that the living room had been filled with everyone I suspected was a wolf, as well as Leah. I hadn't even noticed them all come in.
Emily and I served ourselves first, and then we called the others in.
I literally had to hold my footing as a stampede of muscled 6 ft men filled the little kitchen. I laughed as they looked possessed with the food in front of them. You would think they were being starved.

I took a seat at the large table in the living room, Emily taking a seat next to me, and surprisingly Leah on my other side.
"Hey." I smiled, she gave me a look in between piling food in her mouth.
"Hey." She said back, her voice muffled by food.
It took me by surprise that she was as warm as Paul and Jacob, and she was almost as tall as Sam. Her appetite was as much as the rest of them if not more. I wondered if she was a werewolf too.

"Hey Emily!" Quill said in-between mouthfuls, "this coleslaw is great!"
"Yea and this Meat pie you made is better than the supermarkets." Collin said wide eyed like he was eating a crown of jewels.
Emily and I exchanged an amused glance.
"Thanks, but I didn't make it, Maggie did." Emily laughed
The entire table stopped eating.
"Are you serious?" Collin quipped, his eyes once again bulging out of his head.
"Yea, she actually made over half of the food today." Emily nodded, giving my hand a little squeeze.

It was like I was suddenly a hot topic as I was bombarded with multiple questions all at once.
"What else can you make?"
"Are you any good at deserts?"
"When are you cooking next?"
I laughed as Emily hushed them all down. I sneaked a glance at Paul sitting at the end of the table. His head was held high and he looked smug for some reason.
"I think you're going to have to help me everyday from now on." Emily whispered.
"I'll agree to that." Leah interjected.

As I sat at the table, I realised how well I fit into this group. I felt like I had known them all my life, when really I had only known them under a week.
"Now is the not so fun part of cooking for heavens." Emily sighed as Sam called the boys and Leah out the house for a moment.
I looked at her confused.
"The cleaning up." Emily laughed.
I nodded in understanding. It would take the entire afternoon.

Paul POV

I was still on such a high from lunch that I didn't even think about the meeting we were about to have.
We walked a fair distance to the house and phased. We had gotten into the habit of phasing for pack meetings, as we were able to hide nothing from each other. This way, we all got our say and came to a mutual decision.

My head was suddenly filled with a bombarding of thoughts about Maggie. From what I could tell they were all good thoughts, mostly about her cooking ability. But one thought stood out from the rest.

You should hurry up and tell her Paul, she can't be in the dark forever. The more you wait, the worse it will be when it comes out. Leah's voice was scolding, but I saw in her head that she liked Maggie. Even though she would die before she admitted it. I saw how she put herself in Maggie's position. She imagined how angry and betrayed she would feel if something like this was kept from her.

I agree. Sam thought. She should be told soon Brady whined. Jared agreed in his head.

Yea man, do you know how hard I had to try to keep my mouth shut. Seth complained

One by one they all agreed, wanting me to tell Maggie today. I felt myself beginning to panic.

I agree with Paul, Jacob said, Maggie needs to spend a bit of time around us. Get to know us more. What happens if she freaks when Paul tells her? I sighed with relief as the pack's thought's drifted to different scenario of Maggie's reaction.

Jesus Christ, Leah huffed, look at you all, you're not even her imprint and you're whining about her leaving. I would have barked at her, but her thoughts slipped for a moment and I was able to see that she cared as well. In her twisted Leah kind of way.

The pack was torn in two. Jarred, Collin, Brady, and Jacob agreed with me. I tell her when I thought she was ready.
Sam, Leah, Seth, Quill and Embry wanted me to tell her soon. Like today soon.
No way in hell that was happening.

Alright, how about this, Sam asked us, we all agree that Maggie will know about us, yes? We all nodded.

Well then how about Paul tells Maggie when he thinks is best. However, it must be within a 6 months window. After that, we tell her.

I thought bout Sam's proposition. 6 months seemed incredibly far away. It seemed good enough to me.

I agree to that, I nodded. I was followed by nodding heads all around me.

Then it's decided, Sam said, walking back to the house.

Maggie POV.

"They've been gone for ages. Should we go look for them?" I asked Emily.
I was met by her smiling face, "A little tip Magz. They do this a lot. They leave at the drop of a hat, and show up out of nowhere. But one thing is for sure. They can look after themselves."
I nodded and the sound of a swinging door met my ears and I walked out of the kitchen to the lounge room, where it was being quickly filled by the missing pack.

"Where did you go?" I asked Paul when he walked up to me.
"No where important." He shrugged, pulling me onto his lap.
After a while of pointless chatter, play fights, and more interrogations about my cooking from Embry and Quill, Paul brought his mouth to my ear,
"Do you want to stay here for tea, or did you want to go home?"
I thought about it for a moment,
"Depends" I said timidly,
"On what?" he chuckled.
"Will I be eating alone?" I asked, looking down at my shoes. Paul's grip tightened around my waist.
"Not if you don't want to be." His voice was soft and sincere
I positioned my self so that I was now facing Paul, he looked hopeful.
"Well I don't, so how does roast chicken sound?"
"It sound great!" Jarred chimed in taking a seat next to me. I laughed as I heard multiple yes's through out the room.
"Well too bad." Paul said standing me up and pushing me out the door, "You weren't invited."
"Paul." Sam stood, his face full of sympathy.
"Shit." Paul cursed, his face turning sombre.

"What is it?" I asked
"I gotta work tonight." He said, looking at me with a pained expression.
"Oh" Was all that came out in the shock, "All night?"
He nodded.
I felt tears bubbling up through my cheeks, I needed to get out of there fast.
"Well then I guess we'll have it some other time. I gotta be heading off anyway." Invisible walls began to rise around me.
"I can still drive you home and stay a bit. I don't start until six." Paul said quickly, his face was apologetic and sad.
"No it's ok. I gotta make an errand any way. Thanks for having me Emily. Today was great, seeya guys!" I waved to everyone.
I could feel an ocean of eyes on my back as I got in my truck and pulled out the driveway.

To be honest, I dreaded going home without Paul.
With out him, I became aware that my dad was gone. Without Paul I would be alone.
I went to the Library to avoid going home at all costs.
I even ate out at the Diner where I had my birthday.

Eventually I couldn't go anywhere but home.
I slumped onto my dad's bed and let myself feel what I knew was coming.
The pain of not knowing if my father was alright.
The pain of my dead mother.
The pain of being alone.

I craved Paul's presence to numb me. I needed him like I had never needed anyone before and it scared me.
I wanted his arms around me to feel safe.
I wanted his voice to sooth me.
I wanted his heart to love me.

To be continued.
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