Penny: *plays fanfare* Here it is, folks! The POV you've been waiting for! I hope we did okay on it!

Lisa: I love Jasper...but Edward...le sigh! I'm really looking forward to getting inside his head.

Penny: Oh, me too! He seems to be a complicated soul. Anyway, I don't want to give too much away, so a BIG thank you goes to our prereader, Kerrfrano, and our beta, Harrytwifan. Without them, we would be in a world of hurt!

Lisa: They sure do a wonderful job of helping us get this story just right. So, without further ado, we bring you Edward. Oh, and we don't own Twilight, we just play with the characters till they bend to our will.

CHAPTER 6

EPOV

"Holy shit!" I exclaimed as I was suddenly drenched with freezing cold water. Sitting up suddenly made the drum pounding behind my eyes intensify by about a thousand and my stomach rolled uncomfortably. As soon as I wiped the water out of my eyes, I found myself staring up at the livid face of my father.

"Edward Anthony Cullen, you are a disgrace," he spat with a sneer. "Do you realise you just made a spectacle of yourself, and me, by coming here completely wasted?"

I put my head in my hands. "Do you think you could keep your voice down?"

"Hell no, I won't! You made me look like a fool in front of those two men, and I cannot and will not stand for it!"

His acidic tone grated on my every nerve, my hangover preventing me from lashing out at the one man who was supposed to care about me.

What a joke.

From the day I was born, my so-called father did nothing but push me beyond my limits, belittle me in front of others when I didn't meet his unrealistic expectations, and make me feel like a complete and utter failure at every turn.

Apparently, I couldn't do anything right.

Not only did I refuse to follow in his footsteps, I skipped going to college altogether after dear old dad refused to let me follow my dream and go to art school. I'd spent the years since then drifting in and out of one low-paying job after another, never really finding my place in life, not once feeling as though I fit in.

It was true...I'd never felt comfortable in my own skin, and was still to figuring out who I was, but my father was supposed to love me, wasn't he? Support me, no matter which path I chose to take?

Well, apparently he never got that memo.

"Are you even listening to me?" he snapped, his face mere inches from mine as he towered over me, while I cowered on the couch, shoulders hunched, defeat the only thing left in my heart. "What the hell were you thinking, leaving your family without a word, only to come home with no explanation and to top it all off, embarrassing me in front of a potential contractor the first opportunity you get?"

"I don't know," I answered in a barely audible, cracked voice, moisture stinging the corners of my eyes.

"Not good enough, Edward. You've spent your entire life making excuses for your irresponsible behavior, but I'm done with your inability to know what's best for yourself, so I'm going to make it really simple for you. First and foremost, I don't ever want to see another drink pass those lips."

"I don't have a drinking problem!" I retorted angrily, knowing I'd been drinking way too much in recent months, at the same time not wanting to admit it was an issue. Trying to drown out my feelings of confusion after one particularly fateful night caused me to question everything I thought I knew about myself.

Ignoring my lame attempt at arguing with him, he added, "Secondly, I'm giving you a job on this project. You'll turn up for work on time, do your hours, and come home. No staying up past midnight, no going out and getting wasted. You'll pay room and board, and put the rest of what's left of your salary into a savings account."

"But..." I couldn't think of a way to argue with him. Though I felt as though he was treating me, a twenty seven year old man, like a child, he was right. I'd spent my entire life running from something I had no hope of escaping...and I thought once I'd left home and struck out on my own things would become easier...clearer somehow.

Unfortunately, spending the last several months working and travelling around the country, isolating myself from any and all social contact, had done nothing to settle the feelings of uncertainty that seemed to be weighing me down.

"No arguments, Edward. You'll do this, if not for me, then for your mother. Is that understood?" he said in a slightly softer, but nonetheless still very intimidating tone. The door opened, and in walked the woman in question.

"Yes, Sir," I answered, not seeing any other choice.

"Right. Well, now that's settled, thanks to your grand entrance today, I'm officially behind schedule. I have one more thing I need to take care of, so I suggest you go home, shower that stench off, and get some rest. You're going to need it."

"Fine," I answered, breathing out a heavy gush of air. I watched my father shoot me a warning glare before he picked up his jacket, slipped it on, then turned and left.

"Oh, Edward, I've been so worried about you. What on earth possessed you to do this to yourself?" Mom asked softly, pulling me in for a hug at the same time. She steered me out of Dad's office and back toward her desk, where I pulled up a chair and sat down next to her.

"My whole life is why," I told her, once again putting my head in my hands. It still hurt.

"What do you mean, your whole life?"

"In his eyes," I said, raising my head and jerking my thumb toward Dad's office, "I have never lived up to his expectations, and I never will. He is such a stuffy bastard, and if people don't act just the way he wants them to, he hates them for it."

"Your father doesn't hate anyone, least of all you, Edward."

"Oh yes, he does." I looked at my mother, her face filled with concern. "I didn't go to college, so he had a fit. I wasn't married with two point four kids by the time I turned twenty five, so he lectures me. Did he ever once ask me what I wanted to do with my life? No. Instead, he assumed I would be just like him. Well, I'm not like him, in any way, shape or form, Mom."

"I know...we know you're not," she said in a defensive tone.

I sighed. She loved Dad more than anything, as she did me, and hurting her was the one thing that prevented me from standing up to him.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap. I think I need to go home, take some painkillers for my head, and get some sleep."

Mom patted my arm. "Do that, honey, and when I get home, I'll cook us a nice dinner, and we'll talk some more."

"All right," I said, stood and hugged Mom again, then left the building.

The cab ride home was miserable. I just wanted to get clean and fall into my bed, preferably to never wake up. That would surely please my dad. Working for and living with him was going to be the ultimate test of my patience, I was sure. Though I had no idea what to do next, the situation I now found myself in wasn't exactly what I wanted, either.

"So, Edward. Tell me what's been going on with you. Maybe I can help," Mom began as we sat down to a late dinner of steak and vegetables after having eaten most of our meal in a tension-filled silence. I'd spent the rest of the afternoon sleeping, and my headache was gone, but it hadn't killed my sullen mood.

Taking a mouthful of steak before chewing and swallowing, I shook my head. "There's nothing you can do."

"If you don't let either of us in, that's guaranteed to be the case," she gently admonished, stabbing a piece of honeyed carrot with her fork before placing it in her mouth. Looking thoughtful as she ate, she asked finally, "Why don't you start by telling me why you left without so much as a word all those months ago."

Memories came flooding back of the night that changed everything. Dropping my knife and fork onto the plate, the clattering sound causing Mom to jump, I stood up and turned to leave before she grasped my forearm.

"I'm not ready to talk about it," I said quietly, teeth clenched. It wasn't as though I thought my mother wouldn't understand. It was about the fact that if I said anything, Dad would know about it right away, and the knowledge that I'd disappointed him yet again would only serve to alienate him further.

"Well, you know I'm always here when you're ready, honey."

"Thanks, but there's nothing to say that hasn't already been said," I responded, knowing I was wasting my breath to want anything but what my father wanted.

"You might think there isn't, but..."

"But what?" I asked, watching as her sea green eyes darted around the room before they met with mine once more. Her anxious expression made me wonder if she knew more than she was letting on, until her face morphed into the sympathetic one I'd become so familiar with.

"Edward, no matter how you feel about your father's single-minded ways, you know you can tell us anything, right?"

"No, I don't," I said, faking a yawn, unwilling to discuss it any further. "Anyway, I'm off to bed, Mom. Thanks for the lovely meal."

And with that, I bent down and gave her a quick kiss on the forehead, before pulling my arm away from her vice-like grasp and heading up the very grand, winding staircase.

After taking a quick shower and brushing my teeth, I headed for my old room. Quickly pulling off my towel and hanging it on the hook on the back of the door, I reached into my suitcase and pulled out a pair of black sleep pants and a white wife beater before zipping the bag shut. I'd still not unpacked a thing since arriving home. Unpacking meant I was somehow giving up, conceding defeat, I reasoned. So I continued to foolishly live out of my suitcase, as if that would prevent me from setting down roots here, and help me to move on. I knew I was denying the truth.

That my life lacked meaning; not only void of direction, but was, in fact, based on nothing but a lie.

A lie I couldn't face owning up to, let alone one I could confess to my parents. The internal battle I'd been waging these past months was only ever relieved when I drank a little.

My few attempts at dating had been nothing short of disastrous. It all culminated one horrible night, that night in particular causing my world to crash down around me, fear and doubt becoming my constant companion from that moment on.

It wasn't as though the tall blond wasn't beautiful. In fact, she was stunning, but her beauty wasn't the reason I'd managed to get hard when she took me in her mouth in the backseat of my car. She'd just learned a man she'd known and loved for a long time didn't feel the same way about her, and had spent the entire night telling me about how he only had eyes for someone else, but it was complicated because they were all friends. She told me she was looking for one night with someone to help forget about her situation, which was perfect for me, because I was pretty much out to do the same thing.

Oh, and prove to myself that I was as straight as they came.

What I came to discover, however, was that I was anything but. When she described his body...the way he was built and how handsome he was as we kissed sloppily and fumbled awkwardly in the confined space-that was what got me going. And so, with fear and confusion that my couple of drinks had dampened, I closed my eyes and allowed thoughts of hard, lean muscles, a firm ass, and a deep, sexy voice to take up residence within my lust-addled and thoroughly confused head. After we were done, the feelings I'd managed to suppress soon reared up once more. The moment she got out of the car, I hauled ass home, packed a bag, and left town without a word.

Plonking my ass down on the end of my bed, memories threatened to drag me under. As I cast my eyes around my old, familiar room, I felt as though it had been here waiting for my return, my life not moving forward at all, but instead, coming full circle.

Just as I'd remembered, posters of works from my favourite artist, Salvador Dali, covered most of the walls, while the bookshelves mounted above my small desk were filled with a small but eclectic mix of art books. An easel stood proudly in the corner adjacent to the huge picture window, upon which sat a blank canvas and several sets of untouched oil paints and brushes. Tears welled in my eyes as I recalled the day I left home all those months ago, and I made a decision. My life was a clean slate, ready to begin anew. As I switched off the bedside lamp and crawled underneath the cool sheets, I closed my eyes, and hoped that the canvas of my existence would soon be filled with color and life.

Oh, we can't wait to see what y'all thought of this one! :D

See y'all soon!

Penny and Lisa