"You sure you're gonna be alright on your own tonight?" Joel asked as he entered the room.
Ellie was laying back on the couch. Wesley had sent her home with Joel the previous day, but not before explaining how to clean and re-dress her wound properly and emphasizing that she get plenty of rest and relaxation.
"Joel, I'll be fine! I've got movies and comics to keep me company, see?" she said, holding up a stack of comics and some DVD boxes. "Maria said she might stop by too. You deserve to have a little fun without worrying about me for a night".
"It's just a game of cards, it ain't a big deal if I skip out on it".
She raised her eyebrows at him. "Um, no. You're going".
Joel sighed. "Alright, then".
"And actually try to make some friends tonight, will you?"
"Real funny".
Tommy had decided that everyone could use a laid back evening and planned a game of cards at his place with some of the guys on the settlement. Joel was looking forward to playing cards and the normalcy of having a "guys night", but didn't care too much for making friends right now. He mostly cared about Ellie getting better.
"Anythin' I can get you before I go? You okay to take care of yourself and all that?"
"Yes, now get out of here before I break my stitches open forcing you out the door!"
"Okay, okay. I'm goin'" he said, holding up his hands in defeat and approaching the door. "I'll be back real soon. I don't expect this to take too long".
Ellie rolled her eyes. "Don't stay out past your curfew young man!" she said, chuckling.
Joel began walking to Tommy's, wishing he was back in the house with Ellie. He was afraid to leave her alone ever since he had almost lost her for good. He knew she would be fine on her own, that she could handle herself, but the nagging in the back of his mind was driving him crazy. I just have to get through a few card games and that's all, he assured himself.
When he arrived, he found everyone else was already there, sitting around a large table and laughing. Tommy saw Joel walk in first.
"Big brother! Better late than never!" he yelled, his southern accent more prominent than usual.
Joel, noticing his brothers overly joyful attitude, eyed the contents on the table and saw two bottles of alcohol among the decks of cards. It was clear that most of the guys had already taken to indulging in it.
"That whiskey?" Joel asked, pointing at the bottles. "Where did you even get that?"
"Lucky find, ain't it?! Jimmy here was the one who picked it up on a search. We all decided to save it for a special occasion". After noticing that Joel was still standing, he said, "Pull up a chair, brother!"
Joel sat next to Tommy, who then became somber for a moment. "How's Ellie doin'?" he asked quietly.
"She's fine. You know how she is, tough and all". Tommy nodded in response.
"Have yourself a drink!" Tommy slurred as he grabbed an empty glass and began pouring before Joel could answer. He slid the glass over to Joel, who watched it's contents slosh back and forth in the process. He couldn't remember what alcohol tasted like, or even the last time he'd even seen a bottle of it.
"I suppose one drink couldn't hurt" he said, taking a sip. "Deal me in".
Ellie laid on the couch fighting sleep, with her things strewn about on the floor next to her and a movie playing in the background. She wanted to stay awake to tease Joel about how his night had went. Considering he had said he wouldn't take long, Ellie figured it was a good sign that hours had passed since he left.
She wasn't sure how long she had been dozing when the sound of the door opening woke her. In the darkness she could see Joel stumble into the room, clearly off balance.
"Joel? Are you hurt?" she asked, alarmed at his unusual entrance.
She sat up and turned on the small lamp next to the couch. Once Ellie saw Joel properly, she realized he wasn't hurt at all.
"You're drunk!" she said, unable to contain her laughter.
"I'm not drunk". Joel slurred slightly, walking through the room uneasily.
"Yes you are! Oh, this is great. I will never let you forget this". She continued laughing at him.
"Tommy had some drinks out, and I may have had a glass or two". he said, falling into an armchair.
"Or ten" Ellie said, clearly amused. "So, fun night with the boys, eh? Make any friends?"
"Plenty". Joel slumped in the chair, closing his eyes.
"Alright big guy, let's get you to bed" Ellie got up and tried to lift Joel from the chair. "Going to need a little help here".
Joel opened his eyes slightly and lifted himself up from the chair, falling off balance and leaning onto Ellie for support.
"Just take it slow, come on" she said, guiding him towards the bedroom. Joel's weight on her was heavy, but she didn't think he could walk on his own.
"Ellie", he said seriously, stopping and looking down at her. "I don't know what I'd do without you".
Ellie was surprised and touched at Joel's sappy confession, but knew it was only the alcohol talking. "For starters, you'd have fallen asleep in that chair instead of your comfy bed".
He made a noise that sounded something like a laugh and they continued towards the bedroom. Once they walked in, Joel collapsed onto his mattress.
"Easy! Watch yourself". She bent down to his level and covered him over with a thin sheet. Before she could away, Joel called her back.
"Ellie... I'm sorry".
"Sorry about what? That you got a little drunk? It's actually pretty funny".
"No, no. I'm sorry. You have to know". He was mumbling so much that Ellie almost couldn't make out what he was saying. She had to lean closer to him to listen.
"You're not making any sense, Joel. Just get some sleep and then you can make all the apologies your heart desires in the morning". As she finished her sentence, it dawned on her. Was Joel talking about the Fireflies? She felt a nauseous feeling come over her and she looked at Joel. She wasn't sure if she could handle hearing the truth, not with him in this state. The poor guy probably wouldn't even remember telling her.
"You remember... you remember when I told you to keep findin' somethin' to fight for, to survive for?" he tripped over his words slightly.
Ellie didn't answer, just continued to watch him.
"Well, it's you. I fought for you. I'm fightin' for you" he confessed.
She felt her heart drop and insides flip around at his words. She knew that she felt the same about him, that she cared so much about him that it made life worth living.
"I'm fighting for you too". She choked back the tears that were now threatening her.
"I did it all for you, Ellie" Joel mumbled. He was getting sleepier by the moment, and Ellie could see him drifting off. "You have to know. They... they were..." he began, but he fell asleep before he could finish his sentence.
Frustration rose up inside Ellie. This was more proof that there was something Joel was hiding, and although she was scared, she wanted to know now more than ever. "Who? What? Come on, Joel" she said desperately, shaking him. She knew it was no use. He was passed out cold from the alcohol. He probably would hardly remember the conversation.
Ellie sighed and sat back against the wall, deep in thought. For a while she watched Joel sleeping, wishing he would wake up and just confess something, anything. Whatever it was that he was hiding, she knew his motivation for it. Joel's voice repeating I did it all for you Ellie, rang through her head. How bad could things have gotten at the Fireflies that he felt he needed to lie to her about it?
"What are you hiding, Joel?" she whispered.
Once again her questions went unanswered as she crawled over to her mattress and tried to sleep. She had a feeling it was going to be another long night.